Happy I could help people get karma and gold <| sep |> Well it ' s not so much about expecting people to be childish as it is hoping they would be mature and vote correctly . But we showed them ! <| sep |> The entire Trump campaign was an act but cyber security and the lobbying ban are probably things that will happen because they require no effort on Trumps part and theres no political capital that needs to be spent for congress to get behind either , if they even have to . Almost all of that can be handled in house through executive action . <| sep |> This is a joke written with real sentiment , you see , my life is not near the point of soggy toiletpaper , and the mental hospital cleared me less than a week ago with no real diagnosis other than amphetamine abuse disorder , which is what lol ? No it ' s more one perspective put into words by the power of a million feelings I ' ve been holding inside too long to remember the origin of each . But I ' m angry , angry at a lot of people who did the exact opposite of what they could have done to make the world a lot better for all of us , and I am angry at my grandmother for taking my pills away , which is why I impulsively posted this rant with the intention of it being humorous because I know it would cause a butterfly effect of more bad feelings if I actually screamed at my grandmother like I would truly enjoy doing for the first few seconds . I feel the socially responsible thing to do in the situation of myself , someone who ' s recieving a hail of negativity from people who just refuse to understand my situation when I ' ve gone to the ends of the earth time and time again to sympathize with their circumstances is to channel all of this horrific intolerance into something someone somewhere can laugh at , or otherwise find amusing or relatable , rather than the default human response to anger . an even greater amount of anger . It ' s fuckin alchemy , lead to gold , it ' s the only way I ' ve thus far devised to survive all these damn bullets . But I really am feeling a need to leave a few weeks , maybe months , not as much ' running away ' but just to let shit cool down , upon my return , it will be clear that serial killers aren ' t going to hack me into bits because the world isn ' t like a horror movie at all , which is what my fam keeps on insisting when I stray further than a few counties away . They ' ve done crazy shit I can never prove to keep me here , I swear . And no , I ' m not even robotripping , I took 1 swig as a placebo to keep me from fiending alcohol because I ' m responsible enough to do that instead of getting myself arrested stealing alcohol . But I have suffered depressionanxiety disorders , bipolar , OCD and maybe BPD for my entire life due to unlucky circumstances and events that made me feel like it just gets worse and worse until certain suicide . But these last months have been incredibly stable for me , internally , I ' m just unintentionally stirring up a lot of shit by expressing a lot of things quite poorly , but my suicide potential has gone from constant 8910 to seriously 010 now and it feels great having aspirations , but my family is so damn paranoid all the time they crush me with their frantic attempts to ' keep me from doing something that ' s going to get me killed when I ' m honestly the most safety overthinking traveler ever because I ' ve always been a paranoid OCD clusterfuck of a person really , except now they ' ve done crazy roundabout shit to make me lose all my money and vehicle and I quit my job because I knew I couldn ' t handle any more stress on top of what my family was trying to do to ' teach me a lesson ' or something . That ' s the whole problem with them , they control with fear . They use fear , and if necessary sabatage to make me give up on the dreams they disagree with , thinking I will assume all my plans just fail because they ' re not meant to be and then do as I ' m told instead . But I see right through all the manipulation and bullshit and I have aspirations which I live for thus I will stop at nothing to make my dreams come true , because I will never go back to the days of laying in bed planning the big suicide I procrastinated out of for years for reasons I ' m unsure of , that was miserable . But I feel good now , i have some stuff to keep me going , I just need the pills and the booze to protect myself from the opinions of assholes who like crushing dreams , because I ' m fuckin sensitive and it doesn ' t take much to destroy my entire sense of goodness and send me spiralling back into depression or paranoid repetitious lostness . Although this last week I ' ve been doing alright sober , just can ' t hold a job or handle any responsibility , which I need to to regain the level of independance necessary for me to not return to a state of dreading each day . But I ' m doing great