Current undergrad on the east coast considering UBC for grad school . Mainly concerned with living cost of Van . Would it be worth it to consider the graduate residences instead of offcampus living , or would it still be cheaper to be offcampus ? <| sep |> I want to yes , too busy working . <| sep |> Whos to say that , since you have this power , your body hasn ' t mutated and adapted to prevent this <| sep |> Welp , that ' s definitely one 25 % likely to occur upside to a Trump presidency . <| sep |> If you don ' t go , you might have regrets . But he ' s gone now . least you can do is attend and while what he did was awful , think about the good times memories you had with him and not just think about the bad times . Look at things from both sides . Maybe you can try to put yourself in ur cousin ' s place and be understanding , you ' re cousin sounded lonely , had nobody else , acted on urges on the wrong person on a family relatives member . It happens . If i were you , I ' d go . You should gather up your relatives and parents , everybody at the funeral and give a speech . Mention the rape . It will be very brave of you . Be 100 % honest truthful . And while the rape was messed up , also mention there are good memories and you wanted to be there for him today on his deathbed . The average person will be understanding , people can appreciate the real truth even though it is an unpleasant one . I hope you will come up with the courage to bring it up in a speech and really let others know how you felt and what you experienced with your cousin . It will feel like a fresh breath of air because the more you hold in a secret that hurts . that more it hurts you in the long run . It will help if you wrote it down in letter form so you know exactly what to say . That ' s what I would recommend .