I ' m really feeling like I want to start over again with someone elseThis comes from the fact that you do not feel loved . I suggest you really take some time to talk about this with your wife . I ' m really starting to question if I love her anymore . Maybe its more that you are starting to question is she even loves you anymore , which I 100 % understand in this situation . We ' ve tried counseling . She went twice . I ' ve continued for the last 5 yearsWhy did she stop going to counseling ? Does she not care about improving your relationship ? Like uairaqua said , a crush is just a crush , I don ' t think thats the main issue here , besides that was years ago . I think the main thing to do here is figure out what your wife is willing to do to improve your relationship again . EDIT Added another point .