Still more funny than haitai memes <| sep |> Just bought it yesterday and you just get lost , there ' s so much to do . It ' s really good . I ' m enjoying it . <| sep |> yo I found a dope side zip hoodie there <| sep |> fuck you lol <| sep |> Well shit . Here goes . When I was 8 years old my parents were out every night trying to salvage their marriage , not that it panned out . I had this babysitter who I thought was super cool , he could keep up with me in halo and played football . I went to bed that night and woke up from a nightmare . I went to find him just to have someone to talk to , and I walked in on him masturbating using my mother ' s computer . At that point I didn ' t know what that was , but I knew that NO ONE was allowed to use her conputer because I used it to play runescape once and she hit me . I panicked and yelled at him to stop , and saw that the porn was of a woman being raped on a hidden camera . When he saw me he picked me up by the throat and held me down on my parents bed and sexually assaulted me , and when he was done he told me that it was God ' s plan for me , and made me swear to God to never tell anyone while he strangled me . I didn ' t tell anyone , and I saw him 3 or 4 times a week for 5 more years . My mom told me that I would be going to football camp with him and he was on his way to get me . I locked myself in the bathroom , and he came and broke the door down while my mom drank and laughed . I was physically removed and thrown in the car . When I got back I told her what happened , and she didn ' t make me see him anymore . I went and saw a therapist , but turns out we couldn ' t afford a real one so mine didn ' t have doctorpatient confidentiality , and she called the cops on me . I was so afraid of burning in hell that I told them that I had made it all up for attention , because that ' s always what child psychologist hacks think the answer is . I became an atheist and got over the whole hell thing . I guess I had to . Now I ' m looking for faith , but whenever I try a religion I just feel silly . Today , I just hope to help as many people as I can . I don ' t know if you guys are the same way given your experiences , but I can often see that same brand of pain that I have felr in other people , and carefully approach them about it . Helping those people has really changed my life . Sometimes it ' s caused me to make questionable choices , but none that I regret . Like how my best friend she ' s a girl was being sexually abused by her brother in her adopted family she ' s an orphan and I went to his home and beat the shit out of him there , and got her out of that house . Today , I ' m 21 , studying History at Stetson University in DeLand FL , and things are actually going pretty well . I ' ve had a rough go at it , I guess , but all things considered I know I ' m a better man for it , stronger too . To those of you that share my pain , I ' m sorry that you have to be my peers , but know that it gets better , and life isn ' t all that bad . If anyone needs to talk , I ' ll be around .