I can somewhat relate to your experience . My ex is offering to move across the country to be with me towards the end of our relationship a year ago he decided to move back home to be closer to his family and is now offering to move back to be with me and claims that therapy has turned him into a changed man . It makes me think that maybe I should give him another chance since he is making an effort to grow and change , or so it seems . At the same time , I question the likelihood that he really has changed . Plus , he cheated . That alone should be a good enough reason to never go back to him , yet I ' m still considering it . <| sep |> Fair enough . The problem that I saw here particularly is the victim role attitude . It ' s an attitude that a lot of people adopt as it puts all responsibility outside of their own decision making . Had your grandma not decided to even work hard on Maths , therefore being eligible to participate , she wouln ' t have had this chance . In my opinion , these things are also correlated . Working hard with the right mindset , creates more opportunities than being idle and waiting for someone to throw something in your lap . I know I could use a few lessons in eloquence , but I think this is exactly what this dudes example exposes . A lack of action from himself , then complaining he ' s not getting chances . You have to enable yourself to take these chances .