I think this top comment is how things ought to be , but not the way things are . It should be enough to say you want to wait but as you ' ve already learned some people , women more than men I ' d guess , will take it personally . Instead , make the first date centered around an activity that won ' t easily allow sex . There are a few tips I ' ve read for getting laid after a date . If you do the exact opposite than you ' ll be in a better position to avoid the situation all together . don ' t bring them back to your place . Don ' t even be somewhere near your place . have some obligation . Then if things get on and heavy you can honestly say you ' re enjoying yourself but you are late . Or if she knows from the beginning it probably won ' t even get that far . go on dates that aren ' t late night at a club bar party etc . I feel that if things become serious and you were to explain to a girl how you had orchestrated the date to avoid sex she ' d probably think it was funny or at least unique and quirky . If she finds out date 1 , she has a higher chance to be offended or put off . Sorry if I ' m repeating answers or not answering fully I ' m responding quickly before bed . Good luck .