Well , there was this one time . I woke up one morning , couldn ' t find my glasses . Threw on some underwear and went about my morning . Got dressed , made some breakfast and did some quick vacuuming . I really wanted to break free though , so I head out the door . Next thing you know I trip on the front step and roll downhill . I stop finally in the middle of a parade . There ' s all these people blowing whistles and dancing to some really primo disco . It must have been some kind of motorcycle club because everyone was wearing some really nice leather . Anyway , they ' re all really cool , and compliment me on my fashion sense . No idea why since I just grabbed what was on the floor from the night before . So , we do the parade thing , I get lots of beads and we retire to a low key bar . There ' s old school music , and lots of tango dancing . Blue oyster club , highly recommended . I finally shake off the last dance partner and head back home with this hottie . Tall , long legs and this smokey , sexy voice her name was Lola . So , we get back to my place . I score big time . We do it all night long and into the morning . I ' m laying pipe like a Italian plumber . Morning comes , and Lola finds my glasses on the nightstand . I put them on only to discover that not only had I been wearing my mom ' s house coat and yoga pants , but apparently her lacy undies . Turns out the night before I ' d passed out in her bedroom instead of mine . Anyway , Lola was great . Gorgeous girl , and she seemed to really get me . It was almost like she was just one of the guys . She heads out , I go out to the mailbox . While I ' m checking for mail , I slip again , start rolling . Luckily my neighbour was out getting some sun . He does a running start and tries to stop me . It fails , we keep rolling into a ditch . Somehow , our clothes are ripped and his erection pops into my anus . Accidental gay sex ftw !