I know plenty of incels and beta guys who don ' t lack social skills . The only social skill they lack is actual flirting with women and taking the necessary steps . I know that people have different opinions on this . Many say that if you can ' t flirt , you don ' t have social skills . Just because you excel at soccer doesn ' t mean you ' re ready for fencing . Or dance . Or baseball . Learning to map out and measure a curiosityattraction you ' ve sparked , before amplifying it together , is a completely different style of communication . Me , I had zero experience , when I started flirting up a storm . I didn ' t even know that was what I was doing . I just knew it was a thrill to hang out with aggressive flirts , and then stay just out of reach . vv So naive . So , it ' s not just the lack of experience . Some of it is instinct . I think you were onto something with the lack of experience lack of connectionsrole models , though . When I started seriously flirting , there was someone who explained what was happening . And she was my mentor , through it all . It was . the most fun I ' ve ever had . She introduced me to witty people to practice with , and . Anyways , if I ' d been in another time and place , with a worse experience ? I wouldn ' t even be able to have this conversation now . Who knows what I ' d be projecting ? But at the same time , how you handle finding out that you ' re projecting , is the mark of your character . Some use criticism to grow . Some lash out at the messenger . The latter still lack social skills , even if they ' ve mastered making friends .