The average person freaks the fuck out over GMOs and doesn ' t realize they ' re probably only alive because of them . <| sep |> ideally both . I ' d go with Refia though for the heals and having Fullraise . <| sep |> yea , they got great marketing strategy as usual . $ 40 for a boat in same preorder pack as month ago , just different contents less this time , that does not count as preorder anymore , cuz this is prebeta . <| sep |> It ' s been 8 days since I found out my baby died and 5 days since I was induced . My best friends have texted me exactly 1 time their condolences and one of them said she wishes she was here to cheer me up like this is something to be cheered up from . I ' m sure I could reach out to ask for support , but no one in my life is good at it . And I feel like there ' s an expectation that I can just handle it because I ' ve been through it before ? Which is bullshit because I need support now MORE . My husband said the first time , there was an outpouring of OMG this is so incredibly horrible I ' m so sorry . The second time , it ' s been more like Oh yeah . You already did that . Which . part of the problem might be that I haven ' t shared as widely this time . But the same way I wasn ' t ready to share widely about the pregnancy , I ' m not ready to bring a lot of people in yet . With their advice and their shock and outrage on my behalf . It ' s like I want them to know because it ' s part of my life , but want to hide it because I don ' t want it to define me in their eyes . Like , thats my cousin Ashley who has babies die halfway through pregnancy . Poor thing . . It ' s not all of me . I don ' t WANT that to be all of me . But I wish my brokenness could somehow be known without affecting the way people think about me . Sigh . This is such bullshit .