I concur . It was just always made very clear to me that the respect I owed to my elders was markedly different from the respect I already show to everyone around me . This frequently meant deferring to them , even if they were being absurd think things like aids is a gay disease , blacks and whites shouldn ' t mix , etc . It also meant never debating them , even if I ' m being polite , and often meant just flat out being silent . This expectation held well into the adult years , and not just for myself this included my aunt and uncle who did end up railing against their own mother for it in their 60 ' s . They harbor quite a bit of resentment towards her even years after her death . And I know I ' m not the only one who was raised to distinguish the difference between regular respect and elderly respect .