I agree that age usually plays a huge part in this behavior . Twentyone year olds are at that sweet spot of having that advanced teenager problem of thinking they already know everything and don ' t need advice or heed outside opinions when it comes to their views and desires , and now being 21 they are officially an adult and can speak with authority . It can be a pretty obnoxious combo in people who aren ' t that selfaware . Eventually they ' re going to get a few of their edges knocked off by people who call them on their bullshit and they realize that the world doesn ' t work the way they think it does , so by the time they ' re in their mid to late 20 s they can actually be decent people . If your boyfriend is an ENTJ , he should be pretty logical . Have you ever considered just showing him this post ? It might be nice for him to know exactly what you ' re going through so you can at least have an ally . No one wants the person they care about to be secretly suffering in their own home .