Im a former cutter and I relapse once or twice a year . I cut consistently for my middle and high school years and I am 29 now . Whenever something bad happens or something I dont like about what myselfsomething I did , my mind immediately goes to cutting . Its just so automatic that I think its weird that others minds dont go there . I wonder what its like not to think it and where other people go and how they deal . I wish l could say the thoughts go away but Im not sure once you go to cutting as a coping mechanism that it never really leaves . I give you major kudos for not acting on your thoughts . It takes a lot of will to not fall into those old patterns . <| sep |> The only area where you can tell its pencil is like the shoulders , dang