Firstly , you have nothing to be ashamed of . Considering what you ' ve been through , you ' re doing exceptionally well . Just be honest . Have a frank discussion about dealing with issues together through communication and lead in from there . If all of us were educated with tools of communication from the beginning , most of us might not be here . Setting up how you deal with raising issues and discussing them prior to a LTR can very well solidify the foundation that you build on . Sure some things are uncomfortable and egos can be bruised , but if both partners recognize what it means when issues are raised and take responsibility for dealing with them together , then there is absolutely more chance for success . And hopefully no one can pretend by sticking their head in the sand . Good luck !