I read your comment and thought , wow that guy should really stop spraying random bears with pepper spray . <| sep |> A few Christmases ago , my cousin brought his girlfriend of three months to dinner . They ' d met as a one night stand so everyone assumed they weren ' t very serious . So when they announced they had a big announcement at the dinner table , my big fat mouth opened and said what I thought was the most unlikely scenario . Oh my god , you ' re pregnant . Cute nervous laughter from the family , awkward glances between everyone and my cousin stuttering , uh yeah , actually we are . Three months . Then an awkward silence as everyone did the math and realized he knocked her up less than twenty four hours after meeting her . There was a half hearted toast and cheers , and the girlfriend hates me to this day for ruining their big announcement .