Kinda like hope and change for the Obama administration . Most campaigns have some sort of rhetoric that they build their base upon . <| sep |> Yep . when you back on this post in a few years please tag me <| sep |> When she ' s on home turf she plays by your rules . If you want a happy bathroom then you have it , and she can live or she can go away to die . And yes , I fear this too . MIL # 7 has cancer and won ' t last long the devil doesn ' t know , but a storm ' s coming . MIL # 2 well . dementia wouldn ' t dare , it knows better . MIL # 5 is being deported back to the US as soon as she gets out of prison , if I don ' t have her killed first . But the other 4 ? They all made plans about having DH and I as their full time carers when they were married to FIL , and some after . So many comments about moving in with us if they get ill . It is a fear , certainly . How do you say no without being the bad one ? How do you say no when they have nowhere else to go ? DS 1 ' s SIL works in a nursing home . Her stories , the things she ' s seen . I would not want to go through that . I would die ere I had the choice . Waiting for death because there ' s nothing left worth living for ? Waiting for death because there ' s nothing of you remaining ? I do not want that . And I don ' t want to watch my MILs go through that . But it is inevitable , with no solution in sight . There ' s a Terry Pratchett quote . He had PCA Alzheimer ' s I am , along with many others , scrabbling to stay ahead long enough to be there when the Cure comes along . Say it will be soon there ' s nearly as many of us as there are cancer sufferers , and it looks as if the number of people with dementia will double within a generation . In most cases , alongside the sufferer you will find a spouse suffering as much . It is a shock to find out that funding for Alzheimer ' s research is just 3 % of that to find cancer cures .