It looks like the biggest problem you two have is communication . Why don ' t you talk with him , share your emotions and thoughts . He does sound like a butthead but to be honest all men are , as a gay man sometimes I feel like my SO doesn ' t want to open up he ' s the more serious one . It doesn ' t sound like he ' s trying to come up with an excuse , maybe he ' s just feeling lost or scared , maybe he ' s having another deeper issue that you don ' t know about , why not talk to him ? your SO makes mistakes , we all do thats why were human but it sounds like your just really upset at him and won ' t forgive him . It sounds like the both of you are stressed and have no outlets , why not set a day or a time when the two of you can go on a walk or something and just talk ? I ' m sorry your SO is being a jerk but also it would really help you both if you just communicate your feelings , and give him the time and space for him to communicate his .