The reality is that good and functional relationships are very hard to come by and for a myriad of reasons , seem to be harder to come by as we get older . In fact , I ' d say most people significantly underestimate how much work it really takes to make a relationship strong , and how good they have it when they are in one . The other reality is that a wandering spirit is almost always impossible to satisfy , and that type of spirit can get crushed in the confines of a relationship , particularly a first or near first relationship . It ' s a life conundrum . How will you know unless you learn and find out , but you wouldn ' t be asking if you didn ' t already know or assume the risks . How can you have a satisfying relationship when you feel crushed . To me it really depends on how strong the calling is to find out . If it ' s strong , it seems like you need to take the risk . You could also ask for an open relationship , assuming you are ok that he may also want to experiment . It ' s a tough sell , and difficult to manage , but they ' ve certainly worked for many .