Play it cool , so tell me a bit more about yourself then and maybe you ' ll feel comfortable when you know more about me too put the ball in her court to lead the convo and see where it goes . <| sep |> PJCK ! ! ? what does that mean ? <| sep |> Jund is Jund . Its a color pie . Twin is a single card that made up 4 color pies . Twin was going into every archetype that played blue . <| sep |> What the hell is a beach press ? <| sep |> That ' s how many times I ' ve had sex with her too <| sep |> Should work . I know people eat raw RSO or decarbed co 2 oil and distillate , or add them to food . <| sep |> because nobody cares about them or their feelings <| sep |> I only read the tldr but I ' ll just say based on that , if she can ' t accept you as who and what you are then it wasn ' t the right matchup . Whether it be timing or just maybe her not being the right girl for you because she can ' t handle everything that you are , sometimes people just don ' t work out . Based on pay experience all I can say is time and staying busy will help heal . Try your best to do the things that make you happy . I wish you the best . Edit fml give me a few min to read through , I just saw the first commenter . Sorry , I just have a hard time reading things since I hate everything haha . Edit 2 okay well the whole cutting in front of thing . do you think you were doing that for attention ? Not the cutting part but doing it in front of her ? Everyone is different but whenever I ' ve wanted to or have harmed I ' ve always wanted it to be outside of anyone and everyone ' s eye . Also , do yourself a favor if you haven ' t already tried and go try talking to a therapistpsychologist about your insecurities and your jealousy problems . That will undoubtably affect your relationships the rest of your life if you can ' t at least deep down get some better selfacceptance in regards to that kind of thing . Don ' t think I ' m expecting you to overcome all the jealous feelings and all those insecurities but you need to do something about it , even if it ' s just a little progress . I ' ve had those problems in the past . Not to mention you ' re feeling so lonely at least having someone to talk to who most likely actually wants to help will probably be a positive thing .