Warning This is long but I ' ll include a tldr . I ' ve been friends with this guy , let ' s call him Chad , for about eight years now . We used to be best friends , but I have since moved across the country and we sort of fell out of touch . There was a point in our relationship where we dated . We split shortly after the start because I discovered I needed to go away for a few months across the country . When I came back , we sort of entered back into our old friendship with no discussion about the breakup . He had started seeing other women , and I had decided to enter in a long distance relationship with someone I had met on my trip not long after coming home . In that short span of time before I officially entered in a relationship , Chad and I were still very close . I would come over to his house a lot . We went to see movies and concerts . I took a nap in his bed . We never crossed lines into the realm of romance after our break up , but it did make my long distance nervous how much time I spent with Chad I made an attempt to place some distance between Chad and myself after he mentioned those worries . Fast forward to now , I live with my current SO . He knows about Chad and our history together . I received a Save the Date card in the mail and was initially very excited to attend , but then the actual Wedding Invitation with the RSVP arrived , I started to feel a little weird about it . I would need to fly out there and rent a hotel or stay with someone , and because of that I cannot really afford to take my SO . Chad really seems to want me to attend , offering to help me with my airfare if I needed it . But . while I don ' t think I have any lingering romantic feelings for Chad or him for me , I ' m still an ex girlfriend technically . I love my friend and really want to support him on his big day , but I ' m conflicted . I need a ruling . Should I go to this wedding or just mail a nice gift ? tldr One of my best friends who I briefly dated is getting married . Should I attend the wedding ?