I ' d take Crabtree on our roster in a heartbeat . <| sep |> Ultimatums and interventions just push people away . The best thing you can do is to love and support her without enabling her . She already wants to get clean , but she needs to want to do it for herself . Probably the number one reason why people ultimately fail in recovery is because they get clean for a family member or significant other so that they stop worrying about the person who ' s suffering . For me , anyway , that meant I just got better at hiding it . It wasn ' t until I lost my grades , job , friends , money , freedom , and sanity that I decided I couldn ' t take it anymore . It doesn ' t have to get to that point though . Some people don ' t recover until they hit rock bottom , but you can choose your own bottom