i dunno what changed for me exactly but with my shrink ' s help . for a while , no defined time , i ' ve put away the scale , and refusing to puke my food . so it has helped me be able to fill my hunger again slowly . not all the way there yet . also , what triggers my puking is feeling full . so one thing i ' m doing is eating little bits at a time . i eat a little until i feel nothungry . put it away . if i want more in a little while i go back . it ' s not 100 % yet , but i ' m trying really hard . i know for me identifying that feeling full makes me puke was key . so eating less at a time helps . but if i eat too much and feel full i just deal with it for now . it ' s an experiment my shrink suggested . just letting go of the bulimia for a little while , letting go of the scale , and trying to pay attention to hunger and enjoying food . i have goodbad days but i haven ' t puked in two weeks at all . i weigh every so often instead of obsessively 310 times a day . weight hasn ' t changed one bit . it ' s been a relief to let go for a while and try to find some stability with food . i ' m not obsessing about it 247 tho i still think about it a lot . but . my suggestion is just promise yourself not to puke today . try not to over fill or maybe not even fill yourself up at all . eat about 12 , take a break , eat the rest if you still want it . and allow yourself to enjoy it today . puking doesn ' t moderate weight at all , it just fucks you up . keep that in mind . pretend just for today your life is amazing and you don ' t have this disease . just pretend . enjoy today . be grateful for food , for your life , for who you are . and maybe listen to Alessia cara ' s song scars to beautiful good luck everyone . we can have 1 good day ! then another ! and another .