I understand where you ' re coming from . My narc always asked me Who gave you permission to do x to your body write a quick note on the palm of my hand , get a second ear piercing , etc ? I didn ' t give you permission to do that ! Ummm , thanks but it ' s my body . It was always assumed that if I was spending time at a friend ' s house that we were getting into trouble . Despite me introducing all my friends to my narc , they still thought my friends were troublemakers . We weren ' t . We were good kids , all on the honor roll , all had jobs and paid some of our own bills , etc , etc . It ' s amazing to me the lengths a narc will go to in order to keep you from realizing you can have your own life and have control over your own body .