That ' s your fault lol <| sep |> Yeah mine are still available and I can save 20 dollars on wifi set up ! <| sep |> So since global temperature is increasing , will everyone be brown ? <| sep |> You trust McCown that much more than JR Tolzien ? <| sep |> Oh sweetheart . Give yourself a lot of grace . You don ' t have to be okay with this . You ' ll get through it anyway , one deep breath at a time , but you don ' t have to be okay with it . I made a tiny Christmas ornament to remember the baby , just the size she was when we lost her , and it helped to have something to hold . We named her , and I still talk to her sometimes . When I can when we own a house I ' ll plant irises and hyacinths to remember . You can create tangible things , and make a memorial now . It isn ' t ever too late to honor this baby you love , who changed you . Ignore your cousin . Ask your mom to not send you updates about her , since it ' s too painful when you shared a due date . Reasonable people will understand that . Don ' t hold the newborn unless it feels right . Ignore the baby focus on cooking and hosting , and play with your brother . The twoyearold might be just fine I did OK with toddlers , it was infants that hurt . Does baby ' s mama know about your loss ? You might delicately mention it . We lost our first earlier this year , and it ' s still painful . I ' m sorry I can ' t hold little Persephone but she ' s a cutie . Say it with a smile practice in the mirror 10 x first and then change the subject graciously . You are going to make it through this . Just be kind to yourself .