Are you tired of dealing lead contaminated water , simply because the towns lawmakers let your water supply fall into mismanaged neglect to save a few bucks ? Are you annoyed that , after months and months have gone by , the crisis has been known nationally , and yet you ' re still dealing with your toxic water ? Well fret no more , cause now you can have your very own communist uprising ! cue happy infomercial musicNow you too can throw off the shackles of economic feudalism with just three easy steps . 1 unite 2 seize the means of production , and 3 establish a dictatorship of the proletariat . Then you ' re well on your way to a communist utopia . Amazing ! Don ' t rely on voting or liberal guilt to change things , in a bourgeois democracy , your needs will always come second to corporate influence . Instead , with just three easy membership fees of $ 19 . 95 you can make this easy plan for revolution a reality . If you call within the next ten minutes , you ' ll also get to be a part of this special offer to smash the patriarchyBut wait , there ' s more ! If you call within the next ten minutes , we ' ll also fight against long entrenched systematic racism ! So that ' s throw off the shackles of a bourgeois society , smash the patriarchy , and fight systematic racism , all for only three easy membership fees of $ 19 . 95 . YouMustBe 18 Y e a r s O f A g e O r O l d e r T o C a l l T e r m s A n d S t a l i n A p o l o g i s t R h e t o r i c M a y A p p l y W e C a n t F u l l y G a r u n t e e P a t r i a r c h y S m a s h i n g O r R a c i s m F i g h t i n g A s M a n y O f O u r M e m b e r s S e e m T o B e W h i t e D u d e s W i t h O n e S i z e F i t s A l l S o l u t i o n s W e A r e N o t R e s p o n s i b l e F o r I n c r e a s e d G o v e r n m e n t s S p y i n g O n Y o u B e c a u s e Y o u r e A M e m b e r H e r e O r F o r A n y I n j u r i e s Y o u M a y E n d u r e D u r i n g T h e ProtestsOrRevolutionsCall Now , comrade !