I am actually . I remember when it shifted . I was in my bathroom , listening to this angstyemo song over and over . And I was like fuck this . I grabbed a razor and sliced my writs . and then regretted it right after . I called my mom and told her . She told me to stop being so dramatic and hung up . At that point , I was crying on my bathroom floor , and screamed out I don ' t want to die , Jesus . I want this to be over . I DON ' T WANT THIS ! !! I ' ve tried everything I know . You get ONE SHOT . Fix me , or I ' m done . And he did . It wasn ' t this dramatic night and day difference , but within the next 2 months , I saw a HUGE difference . I haven ' t dealt with depression since then . I ' ve had bouts of being depressed , due to my environment external circumstances . But it ' s not the I don ' t deserve to live depression . It was the this is a really shitty situation depression . MUCH DIFFERENT . You WILL conquer this . And then you ' ll go on to tell other people dealing with this about how you kicked it in the ass . This is not the end .