Oh , sorry I lied . Oh , yeah , sorry I lied again . Oops , my bad ! Lied again . OH I ' M SO SAD LOOK AT MY SAD EYES . Yep , lied again . Its getting harder , with your oversight and all , but he ' s going to run up more debt and lie again . Yes , you recreated your childhood . Your DH is not just undependable with money , he lies to you constantly . That is NOT your fault . That is his choice , and he ' s made that choice over and over KNOWING that it feeds into your anxiety . So . he did it again . What a prince , huh ? Not just about money , either . It ' s not ever JUST about money . You are in the dark about a lot more than debt , guaranteed . <| sep |> We ' ve all been there , trying to end it on a perfect note . There is no perfect note . The only reason you wish you were more aggressive or more badass or more sensitive in your goodbye is because you feel like she validates you . Why else would you care so deeply about a proper goodbye ? What you did was way better than what most people do . You cut it clean , now stick to it . You ' ll want to reach out for months probably , but now is the time to focus on yourself , invest in yourself , get to the point where she ' s not on your mind all the time and you don ' t feel pressured to talk to her . Truly move on , only then will you be ready to talk to her . I had a very similar situation with my ex . She broke my heart and used me for sex for 2 years , but I let her . Finally I broke it off and it took another 8 months of silence and fighting urges to talk to her before I was independent and happy on my own . Eventually she reached out again and we met up for coffee . She was seeing someone and just wanted to catch up but I used it as closure since I never really got to explain myself . I articulated myself way better than I would have the year prior , and I felt great finally getting it off my chest to her . We agreed to do our own things and not plan anything but maybe do a fwb if the chance comes around . I hardly talk to her now and she ' s become a very small part of my life . Where as she used to be a huge part . And when you first cut that part out there ' s a big void you need to fill . So shake things up , try new things , challenge yourself , learn a new skill , heal . You ' re on the right track dude .