You can try bringing up some gay subjects to get a feeling on what he thinks of the matter . It ' s a hard balancing act . You have to put yourself out there a bit if you want to see where it goes but guys your age tend to react harshly if they aren ' t in to it whereas someone my age would tend to just be glad someone noticed they were still alive . Good luck with it . The best thing I can tell you is don ' t try to label yourself . Just be you , don ' t be afraid to try different things with different people . Some you ' ll like and some you won ' t . <| sep |> It ' s not really the same thing as being homosexual . Homosexuality doesn ' t necessarily involve dominance and submission , while BDSM necessarily does . As feminists , we condemn female submissiveness not the women themselves , so why should our advocacy stop at the bedroom door ? Or the door to a dungeon ?