It ' s nice to think that everything can be resolved with words , and it ' s awesome to try that before things get out of hand but not everyone thinks that way . Some people just enjoy hurting others . Seems like she ' s trying to think of the world as a much better place than what it actually is . I don ' t think you ' re in the wrong here but you ' re probably not going to change her mind either . I agree with you , I wouldn ' t apologize for doing the right thing and probably preventing something worse happening . If it ' s not something you both can just let go then you may have a tough decision ahead of you . edit I ' m not saying that I think you could have talked your way out of it either , from the sound of things they had their minds set on beating the shit out of someone . Words wouldn ' t have stopped it .