Might be like the joker ' s though , and have a sillycrappy unawakened form , but look better once awakened ? <| sep |> Hey I ' ll walk you through my Christmas experience ! Morning You just woke up and you have to get out of bed immediately . Not because you want an early morning or because you need a piss real bad but you have the misfortune of having you bedroom window facing east and the sun is shining blazing through your window . You wait in the living room for your family to get up and exchange presents . You have some breakie , drink some beer and then not wait for your nan or cousin or uncle to show up because it ' s only you , you ' re parents and your brother who live in Australia . Midday For Christmas lunch you have salad or seafood because you ' re not gonna bother roasting a turkey in this climate . If you ' re lucky you and your brother get to have a dip in the pool or the spa if you have one , but you have to abandon that venture because your suncream washed off and you can see the sun burn happening . At 330 you decide to have one of the chocolates that Mum got you but you discover that they have all melted because they are from Belgium and don ' t have the right preservatives in them . Evening You all decide to catch a few Christmas specials on tv but then you remember that you ' re half a day in front of the places that all the good shows are made so you have to wait until a Boxing Day for those . No Doctor Who for you ! You all end up watching the Home and Away special . At least we all got to get a bit hammered on some Emu Draft . Last thing before bed is to call the family in England and America making sure to point out how nice and warm it is over in Aus and how they should totally come out here next time . At last you go to bed with content with another underwhelming Christmas ! Merry Christmas mate !