shit I wish my parents still called me . <| sep |> Hey you helped yourself , and guess what , God is just a reification of your higher self because you can ' t accept , due to your ego , that you are actually in fact God and are entirely incapable of setting your life as you really wanted , but can metaprogram your life from the godhead and help your lower self , with alcoholism , as you did . So the ego makes you surrender god and reify it as a external force that is in control . Reify means take a mental concept god , source , creator and make it physical God , gendered . The ego can ' t take the fact that it isn ' t real and that you really are god , this is undeniably true in Western and Eastern literature not doctrine . So you prayed to yourself , and you helped yourself , that was that . God by definition has no agency , therefore can ' t make an action based off a prayer . You are the God of your own universe , just because you aren ' t in control doesn ' t mean you are not God , because God isn ' t in control either . He just flicked the first domino if you want to follow Thomas of Aquinas ' s First Mover Principle . PS I am highly religious , and agree that a poly view of old world triform Philosophical Christianity , Buddhism , and Esoteric religions gives a solid perennial philosophical answer to God and all the questions about him .