I mean , can I replace any players ? Who couldI take out ? <| sep |> Secondary would be the slight inequality between white and black . But even that is just subjective what I like stuffIt does unbalance the game , no matter which way you slice it though . You can be excellent at white at rubbish at black , or vice versa , because the way each side plays is different out the gate , which can mean if you ' re only going to play a single game , you ' re already tossing a coin to see if you ' ll get the side your better or worse at . Over a stretch of games though , with equal turns at each side , this becomes less of an issue . <| sep |> This is a tough situation . I ' m sorry things have been so hard . Since we ' re not in your head or able to ask a ton of questions , I don ' t know whether or not you ' re in love with your boyfriend . It might be that you love him , but aren ' t in love with him , so it won ' t work long term . It might also be that your desire for adventuredramapassion outweighs your desire for love , and you should actually stay with this loving , low drama guy . I don ' t think you ' ll know until you ' ve been through some time in therapy . I feel torn about whether telling him is about being honestvulnerable or whether it ' s just hurting him for no purpose . I want to add , the talking about this would annoy my friends statement came out of nowhere . Do you not have good , safe friends you can talk about feelings with ? This seems like a good thing to talk about with trustworthy friends .