. looks at American Baseball World Series <| sep |> OCD can manifest in many different ways , not just compulsive handwashing and cleaning . It can be repetitive thoughts , patterns of behavior and habits encompassing almost everything . There ' s even a type of OCD called Pure or relationship OCD that has to do with how one actsthinks in relationships . It sounds like you ' re definitely struggling with some variety of OCD , and I would highly recommend looking into your university ' s facilities . My uni has a program where you can get free counseling if you can commit to ten weeks of a fixed schedule . They might also be able to refer you to other low or nocost solutions . There are things you can do to help control your OCD without medications , so please don ' t be frightened of seeing a specialist because of that . I wish you the best of luck , and the courage to reach out for help . Mental illness is unfairly stigmatized . Just by reaching out for advice and help here is an incredibly brave first step . Please don ' t continue to suffer in silence .