. you ' re not supposed to do this ? <| sep |> Okay so I think I should hire you to critique and peer edit all my writings . I got 70 out there and I know there has to be a ton of mistakes . But this is great . Thank you for taking the time I really appreciate it . I ' m curious do you have a passion for literacy or writing ? Are you a writer yourself ? Maybe I ' m just a bellow average writer and they would , but I don ' t think most would pick up all those errors , or even care to try . Hey first off I ' d like to say I did not mean to come off as harsh in my previous comment , I did not realize this was a more amateur project by a fellow fan and rkanye user , I kind of just thought it was a hasty article written by some random so sorry . All good man . I ain ' t a professional . I just love writing . It ' s a hobby . I do agree though it was hasty . As soon as I felt the urge to write on the topic I had so many ideas going through my head I wanted to put it all on the page at once . The whole structure of the piece could probably be redone to make the ideas flow more cohesively . If I was patient and came back the piece to edit every day for the next week like I normally do it could be much better . But then the whole story would have died down in the media and I would reduce the potential for my message to reach a large audience . Thankfully it has thanks to my hastiness . Though the overall quality had to take a backseat temporarily . avoid saying i do not believe I feel pretty strongly on saying things like I do not believe or from my perspective etc , to diffuse myself from being any type of authority figure . This may be counter intuitive but I ' ve recently been trying to convey in my writings that this is all from my eyes . This is how I see the situation and the world around me . But I understand how it can sound weaker and actually did change it . 7 honestly just kills me . theres nothing awful about it but there are a lot of small structural mistakes and I do not feel like rewriting the whole thing , i do urge you to look it over though . I feel you . Because when I read over He understands how he ' s changed and what many miss about him . He understands exactly how to behave in the box that would make most like him . Though I just don ' t think it ' s in his DNA to conform the way he knows everyone wants him to . He need ' s to be different . It ' s part of his identity . I know that doesn ' t flow . I can feel it ' s structurally unsound . It ' s missing things . Though I have changed it now , a lot of the time when I write I feel like I can identify the problem easily but I have trouble correcting the phrasing or finding the appropriate word . Any advice on this ? In ur large text you cant say such as bipolar find out the real nameIt ' s called ' Bipolar disorder '. There are different types , but I ' m not knowledgeable enough to understand the the differences between the types . I think I stopped reading because of the formatting , so many small paragraphs and big images make it feel like a wordpress cupcake recipe from a stay at home mom . Gave it another shot though ! This is important and valuable advice thank you . I like to use imagery because , well I love visuals and like to add art to the writing . But I have a habit of small paragraphs . Seems like larger paragraphs and fewer or smaller images allows the reader to focus and follow more easily . I know that Kanye is not infallible , he has done things that are I guess rude , or offensive , but i really disagree with the idea that he has done anything truly rude or offensive enough that he needs our forgiveness . Or that he would need mental illness as an excuse . It is easy to forgive kanye without any further explanation . This is a really great point that really made me think . As much as an advocate I am of him . We are we being fed this idea of a person from the media without coming to our own conclusions . Or rather , we are constantly facing the people who have fallen victim to that , and so we start to exaggerate the negative effects Kanye has had compared to the reality because were simply seeing it so much . At least that ' s the case for me . Hope that makes sense . Anyway I added an important short paragraph on it . So thank you . With the final fucking cmon I was trying to convey my frustration with a common tendency people have when talking about kanye and which i believe your article participates in where they just say stuff like yes of course we all know kanye is a bad guy , but i like his musicThe point of the article was to represent that majority who are doing that and speak to them to maybe help them understand a potential differing side they may have not considered on the topic of mental health . Personally I don ' t feel like I ' m in that camp . I don ' t think Kanye is a bad person . But like you were trying to point out . It ' s a yinyang . It ' s a duality and balance of extremes . Okay I ' ve finished this long ass response . Thank you again for taking the time man . Hope to hear your reply whenever you have a moment .