The fact that the list has gotten so long is just sad . <| sep |> I was raised by abusive librarians . But on a serious note , getting frustrated or bitter about it probably isn ' t going to help . People talk about vapid bullshit like football and cars , not because they really love talking about it , but because it ' s a low investment way to sniff someone out . If someone can sit and talk about intake manifolds and lug nuts for half an hour without saying or doing something inappropriate , maybe they ' re safe enough to have a more in depth conversation with next time . It ' s the same reason people talk about the weather . No one gives a shit about the weather . The subjects don ' t have to interest you , you just have to be able to contribute a few little vittles of input , or ask some softball questions , so that people know you ' re making an effort to fit in and start to get comfortable with you . The good conversations come later .