Haha your description of developing a minipsychosis is pretty akin to how I feel in any new foray . It ' s like my brain can witness itself being manipulated and changed , and it has a panic response . Same thing happened to me when I started reading No More Mr . Nice Guy and The Rational Male . I was like Wait , this has to just be a passing phase , or some new thing that ' ll pass by in my life . Couldn ' t initially handle the fact that there was light being shed on dark areas . I think some of meditation may be placebo when people claim it ' s anticancerous , other broad health claims . But I like to compare it to cleaning the blades on my Vitamix blender that thing has to do WORK ! So why not keep it clean so it can do its job better ? Now I want a smoothie .