It takes longer to update it all as the updates stack up . You gonna be in deep shit when yo old ass ain ' t keeping up <| sep |> uPMMECUTESEALS uRhaegar 1994 usmcadam your Dead God Mascot just did something big . Check Context <| sep |> It seems thanksgiving is more about food than it is about thanks . <| sep |> I ' ve been Looking Everywhere for the Snow Warning One <| sep |> Why must you scare me like this . I ' ve been at 1 for a couple weeks . <| sep |> Yeah , I know the bastard . <| sep |> That explains why it ' s so bad ! I thought it was some sort of alcohol blend . <| sep |> But thank you for the understanding , patience , and reassurance . Especially considering the fact I ' m some random stranger on the Internet Canadian healthcare , haha Well , right now I don ' t actually have any insurance which means I would have to pay full price for meds . I HAVE applied for insurance through the gov ' t but waiting to hear from them . Also , have a doctors appointment booked for the 30 th to get a doctors note , to hopefully get sickness benefits before my phone gets cut off hah . or use it to buy meds instead , whatever I can afford Cross my fingers and hope the uni that I owe money to doesn ' t send me to the credit bureau . And that I haven ' t paid my overly maxed out and cut off credit card doesn ' t fuck me up the ass even further lolI ' m also on a wait list for a therapist but that ' s probably going to take 6 months or so because so many people are looking for the service . I guess that ' s the downside to free healthcare hahaHonestly , I got myself in a pretty deep fuckery . And it ' s only so long you can shove it in the back of your mind until it wants to come out to play with your mind and thoughts . Or play with the little volcano of that messy , clawing cluster of anxiety that sits in your stomachThe logical thing would be to get off my ass and get a job , to pay off my debt and eventually get an education so I can get a job I can enjoy . But I can ' t stomach to do it . Or motivate myself enough , or be strong enough . I ' d rather pull my hair out and scream like a mad man while adrenaline pumps through every inch of my body out of pure frustration . I ' d rather drive my car off the road than go . Hell , I haven ' t even found a field I haven ' t gotten bored with yet . Or managed to make it through a single semester at the university hahah But I ' ll go teach myself relentlessly while I ' m not in school , and while it doesn ' t benefit me . except for the fact of just knowing or understanding something lol Dropped out three times now , and my stubborn ass keeps going back ha