That scene from saw was my first thought as well shudders <| sep |> Cheio de merda <| sep |> It ' s possible you have some mild form of clinical depression I am not a physician , but I don ' t think you need get too concerned at the moment . People your age are still learning about who they are , relationships , and what they want in the world . I would also advise , although I expect few to agree with me , that you avoid sexual encounters until you are in a committed relationship . I don ' t know how to say it well , but men who have sex with you are , in my opinion , less likely to want to get to know you better . because they don ' t have to . It is also a matter of selfrespect if men see that you do not value yourself , they will also value you less . I know this sounds like some ultraconservative Bible thumper talking , but think about it .