It ' s available in the US , I searched for it on Roku , and gave me the option to watch on Netflix or rent on amazon <| sep |> when I was younger I got therapy because I acted out and had anger issues , so for years I only ever viewed it as a punishment like I had to go because I wasn ' t normal . but I think coming back to it has really helped me . and I know what you mean by saying you feel like a bother . I was the annoying kid who didn ' t have many friends growing up , and I think I still carry that idea of everyone doesn ' t want me around , nobody actually wants me with me . it ' s not so much towards the body parts everywhere kind of bother , but it ' s still something that wears away at me . it ' s tough when you hate yourself all the time I guess the question is do you want to die ? or is it just that you ' re not afraid of it and wouldn ' t be too turn up if it happened ? and then from there , where do you want to go from here ? I know it may seem impossible , but it still is possible to go forward from here . At my lowest , when I wanted to die , I looked at myself and thought I might as well keep trying . I couldn ' t imagine that being any lower could feel any worse , and if so I could bear it a bit longer . How ridiculous that a decision so important was so incredibly mundane . I realized I didn ' t have anything I liked doing everything I used to love doing had been corrupted and I had lost any love I had for it . Without me even realizing , I had nothing I liked . So for me I started bouldering . I had wanted to try for a while but I ' m a small guy , and I ' ve never really been athletic , so it was intimidating . but it was nice to find something I could enjoy again . it wasn ' t quick , or easy , or even continuous , but I did improve . I still struggle constantly . I still hate myself . but realizing I deserved to have things I liked and my therapy has helped me try to claim back some self worth that my depression had stolen from me . so what are you doing for you and your own sake ? what do you do purely because you enjoy it ?