Update . esm was marked as one of the masters in the original ESP if I remember correctly , so I don ' t think I actually could have done it without doing that . <| sep |> Hahaha yes they do and and they get mad but it ' s funny <| sep |> Thannks . giant . bro . <| sep |> To who ? ! They ALL have generally shitty service and fees . There is no where to go . All you can do is choose who shits on you and whether it is from a great height or a great height . <| sep |> After 33 years , I realized I wasn ' t a severely depressed and suicidal tomboy , I was simply transgender . Femaletomale . I began lifting as a way to mold my body into something closer to the mental image I had of myself as male . Without testosterone , though , it was slowgoing . I never put on appreciable muscle pretransition . I ' ve been on T since early this year , and in ten months I ' ve gained more muscle than I ' ve ever had in my life . At age 34 , I ' m the healthiest and happiest I ' ve ever been . Lifting kept me sane and gave me hope that I could truly change myself before I was able to transition . It has , quite literally , saved my life .