What you have to do is have the story narrated by Stephen Fry , and kind of allow the characters to be somewhat aware of the narrator , and let the narrator pull away from the story for absurd explanations etc . as required . A bit like the approach to the Hitchhiker ' s Guide To The Galaxy film . <| sep |> We nuked a lot of professors and sports teams . I went there from 20112015 and trust me , it certainly wasn ' t swept under the rug and tainted a lot of my time there <| sep |> When mine get cones , they like to walk behind me and rear end me with it . Just to make a point , I think . After the pathetic looks , the ramming begins . <| sep |> My school has procedurally generated passwords . Based on your full name . And your date of birth . And a giant illegal directory . With all student names and ages . Accessible by all students .