Based on my experience it is likely to shake things up . My birthday is coming up and I made plans for myself i . e . without her for that evening . Told the wife about plans last night and she exploded . Seems to have brought everything to a head and now she ' s decided that ' s the end of our relationship . The attempt at manipulation is so clear she ' s expecting me to roll over and apologise and beg her to take me back . Because when something like this happened a couple of years ago that ' s just what I did . But not today . I strongly suspect she ' ll come to me in a week or so and try to make amends , which is my opportunity to really begin the process of reframing the relationship . But if not , you know what I don ' t really care . Funny how in my above post 24 hrs ago I was saying I still care too much . When it actually comes to the crunch nope . Faced with a choice between carving my own path or following a critical , manipulative harpy , the choice is pretty clear cut .