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Game Time 🎮
Family Picture📸
Marriage Tips 🪢
I remember when it was simple. Horrible, yes … but simple. There was Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold and they matched up with Columbine — which, side note, would have been my high school had my parents not moved to NY when I was 2.
Now, on the same day a school shooting happened not 20 miles from where I work, which happens to be the same day a school shooter in Michigan pled guilty to killing four students and injuring seven other humans, it feels like we're all playing the match game with this fucked-up phenomenon.
I remember these worksheets from elementary school. You'd have a list of something on the left — say, cities — and you'd have to draw a line to the appropriate item in a column on the right — say, states. Newark matched with New Jersey. Chicago matched with Illinois.
It's becoming more and more challenging to remember which asshole goes with which shooting. Part of that is because we're becoming desensitized to this shit. Part of it is because there's so damn many. And that's not even counting the non-school shooting mass casualty incidents. I listened at lunch as some colleagues talked about different incidents. "No, that wasn't the Sandy Hook kid. That was the Parkland kid."
So let's play a game to illustrate just how fucked up our country is. Match the shooter with the mass casualty incident:
SHOOTER INCIDENT
A. Nicolas Cruz 1. Santa Fe High School
B. Jeff Weise 2. Uvalde, Texas
C. Christopher Harper-Mercer 3. Sandy Hook
D. Seung-Hui Cho 4. Amish school, Nickel Mines, PA
E. Dimitrios Pagourtzis 5. Parkland, Florida
F. Salvador Ramos 6. Virginia Tech
G. John Zawahri 7. Umpqua Community College
H. James Crumbley 8. Red Lake, Minnesota
I. Adam Lanza 9. Santa Monica College
J. Charles Carl Roberts IV 10. Oxford Twp., Michigan
ANSWER KEY: A5, B8, C7, D6, E1, F2, G9, H10, I3, J4
Yesterday was family picture day for the Core Four. Boy The Elder and his lovely girlfriend arranged a photo shoot for Wifey Poo and I for our 25th anniversary back in March, and we decided to include the rugrats in it. We haven't done this since 2016, and to say the boys have changed a bit is an understatement.
We were to meet at a local park, but when BTE and I arrived after a lunch trip, we found it to be closed. Why? Because it's setting up for its festival of lights, a Christmas event. I guess that takes awhile.
So we audibled (OMAHA! OMAHA!), contacted the photographer (the daughter of a friend of Wifey Poo) and switched to a different park. The fall colors were beautiful, the wind way too much for those with hair (suck it, losers), and it was unseasonably warm, with temps tipping 80.
We had fun. It's cool to see BTE an Boy The Younger be goofy together. There's seven years between them, but they don't act like it. BTE has been a fantastic big brother, and BTY allows BTE to keep his childhood alive for longer.
As far as Wifey Poo and I, we've had a lot of pictures taken together over the years, but not too many by a professional photographer. It was nice. Happy 25th anniversary to us.
I talked recently with an acquaintance who, after a number of years of marriage, is getting a divorce. This has become a somewhat frequent thing in my life, which I guess isn't surprising, but this one was sad. I'm well aware there are two sides to every story, but this one seems to be all about a wife who just stopped putting effort into being married.
This is as true for men as it is for women, but I'm going to address this to the ladies. Hey … um … us men? We're really not that complicated. Sure, your man might be different, but there are a bunch of really easy things you can do to keep your marriage solid. Here's just a quick sampling of the first 15 things I thought of:
Listen when he's talking.
Support his work. Whether it's the thing that brings home some bacon or a hobby about which he's passionate, be his biggest champion.
Compliment him in public. We love to be seen as your hero.
Show him and tell him that he's wanted. As in, desired. We don't want to be your roommate. We have friends. Neither ever wanted us.
Give him out-of-this-world pleasure. You know what I mean here. In a rut? Google something and be creative.
Invest the time. We see you doing all that other stuff that's really, really important. We want to be really, really important to you too.
Play with him. Whatever he likes to do, find a way to join him. Pool. Xbox. Shooting.
Buy him small gifts.
Write him a letter.
Don't criticize. We get it. We suck. We are abundantly clear that there are things about us that we can be better at. Hearing it from you too often hurts.
Arrange dates with him.
Write a list of everything he's done to make your life better. Share it with him.
Hug him. Often. Strongly. Willingly. Often. Did I say often?
Encourage him. Deep down, we all feel like frauds sometime. Your encouragement means the world.
Tell him he's the one. Remind him why you chose him over all others, and tell him you'd do it all over again. We know, but it's still nice to hear.
Folks, marriage is work. Get too complacent for too long and you're inviting trouble. Willingly, joyfully do what it takes to show your spouse how amazeballs they are.
husband wife
Soul Comforts
Soul Comforts A just-because gift An accidental nap Shared fries A hidden note, found A joined passion A soft hand Communicated desires A hug, freely given A safe landing place A secluded table Memory-filled songs Appreciation, openly stated Take me away from here Take me away Take me Take A common blanket A slow dance…
Boy The Younger runs in cross country nationals this weekend.
Big stuff coming up for Boy The Elder.
I love fall!
Tags: family photo, marriage, marriage advice, marriage tips, match game, school shooting