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Not the A-holeAITA for stating I would never apply to any Catholic colleges?
253 points | 99 comments | 3 months ago ago by Important-Surround-5 from AmItheAsshole
The summary: I (17F) go to a Catholic high school. I don't consider myself Catholic anymore and have told this to my parents ever since a few years ago when I realized I liked girls too and was bisexual. I don't want anything to do with the church that won't accept me and have told my parents. I won't even attend Mass outside of school now. Last Christmas Eve I basically made my family go to a liberal Protestant church instead for that because I told them I wouldn't go to a Catholic Christian Eve Mass with them.
Last night I got into a fight discussing applications when I said I'm only going to apply to public schools and will not consider any Catholic colleges. They want me to go to one like my older sister is. I told them I'm not Catholic so why bother? They told me that there's lots of students who aren't Catholic who go to Catholic colleges and that they're less strict than Catholic high schools and a lot wouldn't even care that I'm bisexuality. I told them I don't care, I don't want any part of the church. They say I'm being narrow minded.
So am I?
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[deleted] |356 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
You can do what you want, but FYI a lot of colleges and universities are Christian-affiliated simply for historical reasons like who founded them back in the day, but basically the same as any secular school.
maully |130 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Catholic colleges are also EXPENSIVE
[deleted] |31 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Well, yeah. They're pretty much all private schools since public colleges and universities aren't religiously affiliated.
dreamingofdandelions |11 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Yes they are. Compared to the university my sister went to (Jesuit) and my state university, was $20K+ difference a semester. And I went to a school with quarters. And it was still cheaper than hers. You're NTA. Apply for what you want. Once you're an adult, you can take out loans. Hopefully you can get student aid and scholarships. And apply for any scholarship possible. There's some small weird ones out there, might only be a few $100, but that helps with books. I knew a girl who qualified for a scholarship because she liked chess, but wasn't a chess prodigy. Got like $200 a year if I remember. That's like 1-2 textbooks.
katlyn_alice |7 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Wtf, my entire degree barely cost me 20k, the states are insane.
piezombi3 |4 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Uhh.. I understand that our college prices are insane, but I (and many others) also got degrees for 20k and under.
katlyn_alice |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
It's more like, I'm Canadian, I can't imagine any school where it would cost that much.
Sarahbear- |3 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I go to a catholic college and it is very expensive. I have a very good scholarship and even with that its still expensive.
benx101 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Though what college isn't expensive in this day and age.
Hint. It's a trick answer. All of them are ridiculous in the price range
Goody3333 |27 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Some are affiliated, but some more than others.
You know it's really a CATHOLIC school when they require a mandatory religion course or of there's school-wide mass.
fucking_omnishambles |14 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
They pretty much all require some sort of religion, the difference is some can be fulfilled with a couple hours in philosophy and world religions survey, and some require 20 hours of theological studies. Anything on the more secular or Jesuit side will just be the former.
I don't know of any colleges that require school wide masses. I go to a catholic college and I've never been pressured to go to mass or anything. I was required to take a theology 101 class but it was actually very secular and I found it very interesting!
Balletanon |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I go to a small catholic women's university in Canada, and literally the only religious part about it is "hey so chapel is over here if you want to go to mass, this is the info for our chapel staff if you need or want anything during the year, and we were founded by catholic nuns!" No religious requirements, and we have a fantastic scholarship/bursary program
solarbaby614 |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Yeah, I didn't attend a Catholic college but I did attend a Church of God one and it was definitely church affiliated. You were required to take several religion courses (I'm pretty sure every one minored in religion) plus you were required to attend 70% of the chapel services they had on campus 3 times a week. They also had Convocation every year, which was required for everyone to attend and was where they had church services every day. People were also required to attend a mission trip to be able to graduate.
It was also ridiculously expensive and the only reason in was able to attend was that I got a full ride due to my ACT score. It ended up depressing me so much I failed almost an entire semester of classes.
ViralLola |5 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I found out Georgetown was founded by Jesuits.
IllustriousComplex6 |5 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Honestly this, there's also going to be a lot of the same kinds of people that they're worried about at all colleges.
BasicChick314 |3 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
As someone who went to Fordham be very very careful with this… Schools that openly tout being Catholic/Jesuit/whatever like Georgetown and Fordham have amazing educational opportunities but have shit policies for transgender students and even worse ones for students who want contraceptive options even including condoms on campus. At Fordham there's basically an underground group of students that distribute condoms to other students and their are archaic rules like not being able to have someone of the opposite gender stay in your dorm room. You also can't start pro-choice groups on campus and other ridiculous shit. I wouldn't recommend and I'm also bisexual and a girl.
Again, I'm not talking about schools that "openly tout it," make a big deal about it, and have draconian "personal conduct policies."
emp9th |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
This!!! I remember being given a forum with list of churches and being asked which I would be going to. It was a tiny college town and had more churches than anything else. There wasn't even an option of no, you just leave it blank if its not for you but it was part of the official paper work.
tank5 |-2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Yeah they only somewhat compromise their entire program by being based on a foundation of bullshit. NTA
...Except most of them don't and your prejudice is really showing. Most "schools that happened to be founded by a Christian sect a long time ago" are not the "crazy Christian schools" that you are thinking of. A lot of "Christian" schools are damn good schools in their own right, and plenty of "secular" schools are for-profit shams.
BoldHYPER |70 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA it's your choice where u study
CakeisaDie |51 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
It's your life. Go to a school that you believe you want to go to that gives you the maximum educational benefit.
Catholic Colleges are less strict in general but if you don't want to go don't go.
If your parents use financing as a way to coherse you consider going for 1-2 years and using that time to get the basic courses and then transfering schools once you have the funding.
Sarahbear- |13 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
In my experience Catholic Colleges aren't strict at all! They provide a lot of opportunities to study other religions and are very inclusive! I even felt comfortable enough to come out because of the wonderful LGBTQ+ community and support on my campus!
Viperbunny |16 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I have the exact opposite experiences, but there are so many types it is probably a spectrum.
[deleted] |6 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I guess that depends on what you think of as strict.
I was considering going to University of San Diego, which I don't even think is that religious. When I found out they separate dorms by gender (as in different buildings for each gender), that was too strict for me.
Sarahbear- |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
😂 at my catholic school we had boys and girls living on the same floor and there was no curfew, the boys could literally hang out in the girls dorms all night if all the roommates were ok with it
I'm guessing it was a 'catholic' school only because some catholic's founded it many many years ago?
I mean I see priests and students who I think are training to become priests (they where long white robe things) sometimes and some of the upper level theology classes are taught by priests but they're all pretty cool. Should I just say the school? Or is that to much info to give to the internet?
primeirofilho |15 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. I'd go to the best school that accepts you that you can afford. Georgetown is a jesuit school and Id love for my kids to go there despite us being atheists.
dimeporque |12 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. Public Liberal Arts universities are awesome, and tend to be more diverse and accepting of people. Not that Catholic unis can't be diverse and open-minded, some are. Picking the right college for you is an important decision, your college experience will be something that you will value. It's totally up to you for whatever reasons you have.
Ouwyn |10 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Pretty sure a lot of private religious colleges have provisions in their student code of conduct that would prevent you from being bi or even engaging in pre marital sex. I guess is that your parents are hoping that by you attending a catholic college you might convert back to your families religion. Find a school you like and go there.
ExternalSpeaker9 |7 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I attended one of these schools before. It's trash. OP needs to go where she'll be wanted. NTA.
Cayke_Cooky |4 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
The good ones, those who are serious about teaching don't do that.
No thats not a thing. I attend a Catholic college and they are very inclusive and have a wonderful LGBTQ+ community! I have also never been pressured to be Catholic and have even had the opportunity to learn about many other religions! I think your view may be a little biased. That being said, OP should be able to go wherever they want for college.
susandeyvyjones |6 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
It absolutely is a thing. It's just not most Catholic colleges.
kirstimont |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
It is absolutely a thing. Just because your college isn't like that, doesn't mean all other religious colleges/universities are like yours.
For two semesters, I went to a private religious university that had a strict honor code. They would expel any student who didn't follow the honor code (aka didn't follow curfew, wore immodest clothing, partook of alcohol, participated in non-hetero dating, masturbated, had pre-marital sex, etc) and put a hold on your transcripts so that you couldn't transfer any of your earned credits to another college. Even if that student was within a semester of graduating, they would have to start all over somewhere else. Women who were raped in situations where they had been drinking would be expelled because alcohol was involved.
I wish all religious schools were as awesome as yours. Sadly, that's not the case. Luckily, I escaped before any real damage was done to my academic career.
Ouwyn |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Some are more strict than others. It just depends on which kind OP's parents want them to go to.
benx101 |0 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
What kind of college does that?! Seems like that school would be seriously breaking some kind of inclusion or equal treatment law of some kind if they do that.
Like I doubt a college is so observing of where students are that they are able to control whether students have sex before marriage
If it's a private college they can get away with it since they can claim religious exemptions.
Distinct-Relation789 |7 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. Get your education at a school you feel is going to be a good fit for you. College is a pretty big transition. It's your time to come into who you are and explore any and all of your interests. So if a Catholic affiliated school isn't a place where you feel you can do that, don't go just because your parents want you to. That's a recipe for ending up miserable and resentful.
For what it's worth I picked a Catholic school (I'm not Catholic) over two great public institutions in my home state my parents were pushing for. I may have done well at either of them, but I didn't want to go and ultimately I had to make a choice that I could live with. I got a great education, enjoyed myself for the most part, and I don't have any regrets about where I went to school.
So apply, and attend a school that will make you happy. Because that's what you deserve and fundamentally if any student loan debt is going to be your responsibility to pay back, you should be happy with that choice.
FluffyAlpaca49 |6 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA, but most Catholic colleges don't force religion on you so it might not be that big of a deal.
CheerilyTerrified |4 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
You don't have to go to any college you don't want to, but your parents aren't necessarily wrong. Depending on where you live Catholic universites might only be Catholic in the vaguest sense. For me it would depend on how closely involved the church is in the running of the college.
Liraeyn |3 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Definitely worth looking up an individual school's position rather than just denominational affiliation.
Yeah. A lot of catholic colleges are really only "catholic" because there's a church on campus and the name might be the name of a saint like Saint Paul, Peter, John, etc.
Flashleyredneck |3 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. How are you the one being narrow minded? Would they accept you going to a Muslim school instead? If all they will accept is catholic, as the only faith allowed when it's not even yours then THEY are the narrow minded ones.
MadameBurner |3 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA.
I spent the first two years at a Chrisitan-affiliated school (it used to be a Catholic college and switched when it became co ed) and it was a nightmare. 2/3 of the student body were girls and most of them went to girls-only Catholic high schools. The cattiness was worse than I ever experienced in high school. The first roommate I was supposed to have refused to set foot in our room because she didn't want to be around a "dyke" (I'm bisexual but apparently my short hair set her off). In fact, the only people I made friends with in those two years were other people who felt like misfits because they didn't act like or look like everyone else.
I took a long hiatus after my sophomore year and eventually went back to a large public university. The environment there was so much more inclusive and support of everyone.
BelovedAntipop |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Unless your parents are going to pay for everything, they don't get a say in where you go to college. Hell, once you turn 18 they don't get a say in anything anymore.
AndersonxCooper |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Don't go to those small state bible colleges those suck. If you're going to Georgetown or Notre Dame it's probably a different experience as they're only historically religious.
maddr_lurker |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I will say that my sister and mother went to the same Catholic college and they're not as "church-centric" as you seem to believe.
Regardless wherever you go to college should be for you. For your best future. You shouldn't be pressured into one (type of) school just to make your parents happy.
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Usrname52 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
You should definitely go to a school you want to go to. Also, a public university probably has more major options, more clubs, more internship connections, etc. Can they suggest a Catholic school with an LGBT+ club?
Do you know what you want to major in?
Also, public school is probably cheaper.
Just make sure you reach out to your guidance counselor and know everything you need to do. Your parents might refuse to financially support you (if they would/could have at a Catholic school), so you need to look into loans and such. Unfortunately, even without parental help, financial aid still looks at parental income to decide how much money you'll get in aid.
What do they want you to get out of a Catholic school, if they say it's okay that you aren't Catholic, and accept your sexuality? It sounds like they are hoping you will change, or at least that all their friends think that you are a good Catholic.
Do Catholic colleges require religion classes?
pkkballer22 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. it's your choice where you want to study. hope you know that your parents will likely not pay for your college fee.
michelle_MPLS |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. What they're saying is true, there are a lot of students who attend Catholic colleges who aren't Catholic and some colleges are less strict than others. The big thing here is that you need to feel comfortable with your decision about where you're going to attend college. If you're not comfortable at the school, you're not going to do well there.
Also, they're sort of the AH because they want you to do what your older sister is doing. They should respect the differences between you & your sister and recognize what works well for your sister may not work well for you and vice versa.
annabannannaaa |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. If you don't want to go to private school that's your decision. Public universities are cheaper and tend to be easier to get into anyways. Your parent's should be happy it'll be more affordable lol
Liraeyn |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. You've made it clear what you want in a college, and you have valid reasons for avoiding a Catholic one. Seems to me that should be helpful to your parents, since a public school would cost less. Have you actually checked out specific schools, to see how they are on LGBT+ issues? The first college I went to ranked low, but was actively working on improving it as of when I left. Good luck.
AugustNClementine |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA but I do think you might want to just evaluate colleges on their own merit. I had a few close friends who went to Catholic colleges and there was functionally no difference in the college experience. One of them just had some priests people would see in the dining hall occasionally. I also don't understand the Protestant church part, are you Protestant? If you don't want to go to church anymore can you stop going?
violetwandering |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA but you shouldnt be forcing your parents to attend a church they dont believe in like you dont want to be forced to a church you dont.
liberatedorwhatever |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. But just so you know a lot of catholic universities are just catholic in name and dont push the religion on anybody. It's completely your choice where to study, but if the best school for your major happens to be catholic I wouldn't rule it out just because of that alone. I go to a catholic school and a lot of my best friends are gay or bi
yackla |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Most private religious colleges are crazy expensive meanwhile providing worse education then you're nearest state school. For stem always go to a large school.
hubrisonthemoon |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Bugseye |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
One former Catholic here, don't listen to them. NTA
It's really rich for them to say you're being narrow minded when the Catholic Church still refuses to recognize gay couples.
Pick schools based on the programs you're interested in, location, cost etc and not based on their religious affiliation.
_Julanna |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA but I do think you're being a tiny bit narrow minded. I was raised Catholic but bailed before confirming. I did go to public schools. But for college and grad school, I went to colleges that just happened to be Catholic affiliated. I didn't even realize it when applying. The undergrad was Jesuit and it was a stellar school. Catholics are really pretty good about the education thing.
It really is entirely different than a catholic high school. Generally, except for the 9 religion credit hours requirement, you can't tell it's a Catholic affiliated school. (For those 9 hours, there were tons of classes. I took 3 and none of them were Christian or Catholic based and it was super interesting). It's like any other college with a wide range of people, but is a smaller private school with the differences that brings. (That May differ based on school and area, but the poi t is that you should find out, rather than write them off.).
There is no reason to aim for a catholic college, I just wouldn't write them off for that sole reason if they otherwise are interesting or good for your goals (where to live, major, class sizes, etc).
Good luck with your choices! It's tough, and you're NTA no matter how you choose or what schools you consider.
Viperbunny |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. Don't go to a Catholic College. You will have no freedoms. It isn't worth it.
Vaughn125 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. Once you graduate high school, I don't think it is right for your parents to force their beliefs on how. I have met many people while I was at college who were also LGBT+ and whose parents pressured them to go to a Christian university, so you are not alone. You should go where you believe you will belong best.
Astro_Dragons |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA you're an adult now. You have to live the life you want and not the life your parents want you to have.
camipretzel |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA and as someone who goes to a catholic college let me tell you that if you're unlucky you'll get classes about religion for the rest of your career. I regret getting into my college everytime i have to use study time to read about faith and god for homework.
gfaed |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
I wouldn't go to a Catholic school either. They have a tendency to expel girls who were raped because being alone with a boy is a violation of their student conduct policy or whatever.
lifeismyinspiration |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. You have the absolute right to apply to colleges that you feel comfortable with. I was also raised catholic and now consider myself a "recovering catholic". I did, actually, attend a catholic college though. Got a few great scholarships, ended up being way cheaper than my state school. And my college was super liberal! Our dean of students was a lesbian and all of my professors were amazing.
If I can offer a little advice, don't go into it thinking about the religion aspect of it. Go into it considering the campus culture, the values of the school, and what the classes/professors are like. I ended up hating the administration at my college but the professors and classes more than made up for the bureaucracy of it!
MyDogIsMrNoodle |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. But I will say I grew up Catholic but we weren't super religious, I did funny enough go to a catholic university and for the small university I went it wasn't bad. I wasn't reprimanded for my sexuality (I was actually welcomed which was nice) and I was allowed to do other things aside from church activities. We had a class that required us to attend a spiritual event and although it implied church it wasn't a GO TO CHURCH OR YOU FAIL kind of thing.
Main thing is, if you don't want to go to a catholic college, don't. It's YOUR future not theirs and college can be such an amazing experience and to go to one you didn't want to go in the first place completely ruins the overall experience of BEING IN college. Good luck with applications!
DazedandConfused8406 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. Go to college where you want. Join an atheist organization. Be free! But for what it's worth, I went to a Catholic university and it's not nearly as bad as a Catholic high school. Almost none of the professors were really religious, and maybe about half the students were. The school was a little weird about having people of the opposite sex in dorms (but that doesn't matter so much if you are into girls). And there were some stupid anti- abortion protests. But overall, it was a pretty normal university.
LavaPoppyJax |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NAH. I think it is reasonable to put some applications in for your family. Applying is not choosing the final college. Ideally it would be places you'd consider, though. Why not research a few of the liberal Catholic U's? You do sound too close minded about it. Catholic schools give an overall very good education. Smaller privates usually are a better undergraduate experience than large publics. I've had an advisee attend a Catholic school with great financial aid and she was Asian and not religious.
-- an atheist who likes good colleges
Bite-Famous |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Catholicism is a wicked religion their leaders hoard gold which jesus forbids, for over a thousand years they tortured and killed jews, christians, Muslims, American Indians, moors, and women. They were the first to enslave the blacks and bring them to the new world, they turn a blind eye to the holocaust and much more even the protestants comment similar crimes own it to the fact that they follow the same traditions
kirstimont |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
You're being narrow-minded?
Ha. Haha. Hahahahahaha
paintedkoifish |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. I'm not Christian, but I attended a Methodist university. I think best known for having Wesleyan in their name at times. My alma mater is a liberal arts school and extremely open to people of all walks of life.
They have an affiliation with the Methodist and have a representing chaplin, but in no uncertain terms to they force beliefs on to anyone. Honestly, the chaplin when I was a student helped me through some difficult times when I lost some family members.
Keep an open mind about higher education programs. Do your research and make a list of the ones that appeal to you and have the majors you want. Then narrow it down, you'll quickly come know your favorites. Good luck!
CaliforniaAudman13 |1 pointwritten 1 month ago ago
Yes. Most are CINO
OptimalFunction |-1 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA of course! You don't have go to a college you don't like! But also, YTA for making your Catholic family go to a Protestant church on Christmas Eve.
[deleted] 3 months ago ago
CommentThrowaway20 |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
This assumes that every parish in their area is as homophobic as the Vatican -- if OP's in a reasonably sized city, there's a good chance that there's a more LGBTQ+ friendly Catholic church they could have attended for Mass.
Source: am a bisexual Catholic who specifically searched for diverse LGBTQ+ friendly parishes when I started attending church again.
Antonio1025 |-8 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
She also knows that is something her family has always done on Christmas Eve. If they want to go to a Catholic service then that is their choice. Just like it's her choice to not attend said service or go to a Catholic affiliated school.
IBarricadeI |13 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
I think you misunderstood her story. She did refuse to go to the service, the Protestant service was the compromise.
Antonio1025 |-16 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Her making her family go to a Protestant church doesn't sound like a compromise. It sounds like her family caving in to her temper tantrum so they could all be together during the holidays.
"These people think I deserve endless torture because I'm sexually attracted to women. I'd rather not go to their church for my Christmas celebration. If you want to go without me that's fine, or we can go to a different church."
Wow, what a tantrum.
Acceptable-Mess8132 |-8 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
It really depends on the church. There are not many sadly, but there are catholic churches that acknowledge the LGBTQ+ community, and advocate for respecting all regardless.
If their parents are at an accepting church, then it's an asshole move to force them to go to a church they dont necessarily fall under because only you are agnostic and dont want to spend a few hours allowing your family to attend a religious ceremony.
But, if the church is unaccepting, like many are, I can totally understand where OP is coming from.
It's a YTA move because most Catholics aren't fans of Protestant churches. I know I personally dread going to a protestan church where it feels like a mockery of the Bible
She's an asshole for making her Catholic family attend service at a Protestant church.
starryeyed00 |4 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
She didn't make them do anything. Her parents decided that a Protestant service with their daughter was more important to them than a catholic service without her.
She shouldn't have made them go. She could have gone by herself to the Protestant church or just simply not have gone to Catholic mass on Christmas Eve.
OptimalFunction |2 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
Again, forcing Catholics to attend Protestant Christmas Eve service is a dick move.
Her family trying to force her to attend Catholic mass/college is also a dick move.
BlackStarCorona |0 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA but it really doesn't matter in the long run. I have friends that went to Baylor which is a baptist college and they weren't baptist.
The one problem however is that Baylor required them to attend church two out of the four weekends a month, so I'm assuming catholic colleges may do the same. Go where you want to go.
Sneakys2 |5 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
It depends on the denomination who runs the university. Many Catholic universities are run by the Jesuits and don't have requirements for students to attend mass. I went to a Jesuit run university. I took courses on Buddhism for my theology credits. Many of my classmates were openly atheist and no one cared.
BlackStarCorona |1 pointwritten 3 months ago ago
Innnnnteresting. Thanks for the info!
McSuzy |0 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
You are NTA but you do not seem to be handling this very adeptly, even for a teen.
Are you in a position to independently secure admission to college and pay for your own upkeep and tuition?
Most likely, your parents have a stake in this decision and you would be wise to be more persuasive and respectful when you discuss it.
Also, is cost a factor? A lot of catholic colleges are fairly inexpensive. Have you saved a lot of money to contribute to your tuition?
The goal is to happily attend a college where you are comfortable. You can make that happen without quite so much drama. Talk about where you would like to apply and why. (Why needs to be a lot more than 'it's not Catholic'.)
I was raised Catholic and have been a humanist from the time I was about your age. Attending midnight mass with your family is really not such a difficult thing to do on Christmas, particularly if you're willing to go to a church to begin with. Sitting there for an hour with your family won't hurt you any more than sitting through mass at school. Unless you are a devout member of the liberal Protestant church and that faith is very important to you, I think you should be more reasonable at the holidays.
FYI I am a bisexual female (raised catholic but no longer religious at all) and I go to a Catholic College! Honestly I've never gone to church and it's not like religion is shoved in your face or anything! They are very inclusive and you don't have to have any part in the church! I even took a theology class that was taught in a very secular and academic way. That said, you can go wherever you want for college!
giheeredfox |-1 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA. I will say catholic colleges come in all shapes and sizes. I went to one and I never even thought about it before I started to apply. It was fairly liberal and I only had to take 2 religious based classes my entire undergrad. It's all about finding the right school to fit your ideals. And tuition wise it was close to a lot of state schools and gave me more in scholarship money.
With that being said, you absolutely do not even have to apply to a Catholic college if you don't want to. I chose to go to one and the was my choice. Where you go to college should ultimately be up to you.
CalibanDrive |-7 pointswritten 3 months ago ago
NTA: It is your right to be as narrow minded as you want to be.
"Last Christmas Eve I basically made my family go to a liberal Protestant church instead for that Nevada I told them I wouldn't go to a Catholic Christmas Eve Mass with them."
That doesn't sound like i compromise. It sounds like her family caving to a petulant child just so they can all be together during the holiday.