Penises Largest Among Hip Hop Fans
Richmond, Va. Scientists are scratching their heads at new evidence supporting the claim that fans of hip hop, over any other genre, have the largest penises by a staggeringly large margin.
The website condominion.com made the claim last May after compiling the demographic data from their sales questionnaires. When asked which music their customers preferred, 83% of their 'larger' clientele clicked the box marked "Hip Hop".
University of Virginia Professor Michael Reblock said "Condominion's assertion that hip hop enthusiasts had the largest penises was very unscientific and basically, unbelievable. I mean, why would fans of one style of music have larger penises than another?" But, after taking every factor into consideration and eventually having self-proclaimed hip hop and rap enthusiasts tested, Condominion's claim was proven to be 100% accurate.
As to why the genre attracts more well-endowed listeners? "That's a whole different question" Reblock said "We tried correlating the amount of testosterone produced by large-penised men, there wasn't a connection there. Really, your guess is as good as mine" Reblock also confirmed the entirety of Condominion's list of "Music Genres by Penis Size (in descending order).
When asked about size specifics Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., M.P.H. reported "I am more interested in the broad range of penile sizes than only the averages. For those reading the full article, you can find the distribution of reported sizes in Table 3. There you will note that men in our study had erect penis lengths of 4 to 26 centimeters and erect penis circumferences of 3 to 19 centimeters. For people who care about penis size averages (and many people do, based on the questions I receive), we found an average erect length of 14.15 cm and an average erect circumference of 12.23 cm as can be seen in the abstract of the article on the Journal of Sexual Medicine's website. However, the average size increased to a whopping 17.12 cm in length and an average erect circumference of 13.44 cm if the penis were found in a pair of baggy pants. I don't get it".
Condominion CEO Wally Zimmerman said "I know the genres in the survey were generic but if the customer had to identify as being a fan of one of these general categories, that affected the size of the condom they purchased. Those same customers were the most likely to purchase cocoa butter, mentholated cigarettes and novelty hair picks with fists on them from Amazon.com, but is there a factor that links all of these things? I'm not really sure."