Miracle Match: Texas woman donates kidney to…
Miracle Match: Texas woman donates kidney to New Jersey man she never met
How a Facebook post and advanced transplant surgery restored a life and created a special bond between two families
Roy McIntosh, 48, of Mays Landing, underwent a kidney transplant at Virtua Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital in Camden. His new kidney came from a living donor he had never met: a woman from Texas who saw and seized an opportunity to help a stranger. Pictured are front row, from left, Julia McIntosh, Toshira Maldonado-McIntosh, Jacinth McIntosh and Jni McIntosh. In the back row are Roy McIntosh and Judah McIntosh. (NINA SOIFER PHOTOGRAPHY)
By For The Central Record |
PUBLISHED: September 12, 2022 at 3:05 p.m. | UPDATED: September 12, 2022 at 3:06 p.m.
CAMDEN – The notion of answered prayers and divine intervention mean different things to different people. But two families forever bonded by a kidney donation believe they have irrefutable proof that miracles can happen.
On June 8, 2022, Roy McIntosh, 48, of Mays Landing, underwent a kidney transplant at Virtua Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital in Camden. His new kidney came from a living donor he had never met: a woman from Texas who saw and seized an opportunity to help a stranger.
"None of this makes logical sense," said donor Heather Schaefer, 33. "But now that it's happened, it feels like it was meant to be."
"What are the odds that a Caribbean man in New Jersey and a woman from Scotland living in Texas would even find one another, let alone be compatible?" mused Roy's wife, Toshira Maldonado-McIntosh.
Exactly eight weeks after the successful surgery, Roy, his wife, and four of their five children, met Heather and her two children in person for the first time. The tearful, joyous gathering on Roy's front lawn cemented a bond that both parties are certain will last a lifetime.
"We love Heather, and we are forever grateful," said Roy, a New Jersey native whose parents came from Grenada and Trinidad. Heather was born to American parents in Scotland, where she lived until she was 16.
Coincidence or Something More?
The story begins in December 2021, when Roy's wife, Toshira Maldonado-McIntosh, posted a message to a Facebook group titled The Laughing Christian. Although she did not personally know any of the group's members, she had faith in the power of prayer, and sought support regarding her husband's lifelong kidney issues and his reliance on dialysis. Her message read:
"Please pray for my husband that God sends a type B+ living kidney donor to him. We believe in God for a miracle. Please pray for him."
Toshira had no way of knowing that more than one thousand miles away, in Harker Heights, Texas, a military wife would see the post and – almost instantly – make a decision that would change both of their lives.
"I read the message and thought, 'That's for me,'" Heather said. "Somehow I just knew I had a part to play. So I messaged the lady about 30 minutes later and wrote, 'I am B+ [blood type] and I'd like to look into if I can donate my kidney.'"
Toshira, understandably, had reservations. Would this random person from Facebook really follow through? Did she fully comprehend what she was volunteering for? Would Heather and Roy even be a match?
Given all these uncertainties, Toshira did not say anything to Roy. Instead, she provided Heather with the contact information to the living-donor coordinator and held on to hope that her prayer would come true.
Step One: Registration
True to her word, Heather took all the necessary steps. First, she called her husband – who was deployed in Southeast Europe as a commander with the U.S. Armed Forces. Heather admits it was one of the stranger phone calls she's ever made.
"My husband was surprised by my decision. But the more we got to talk about it, the more research we did, the more supportive he became," Heather said. "About a month before the surgery, he called me to say, 'I'm really proud of what you're doing.'"
Like her husband, Heather's family and friends had
seemingly endless questions about her decision to become an organ donor. To shed light on the situation, she began creating and posting videos to YouTube called "Adventures with My Kidney."
"Making the videos helped me organize my own thoughts and explain the process to my loved ones. I also hoped sharing my story would remove some of the mystery and help other people consider becoming an organ donor too," Heather said.
Even with Heather's best intentions, there was no certainty that she and Roy would be a match. Relatively new immunosuppressive medications help to ensure the recipient responds well to the new, unfamiliar organ – but it all hinges upon identifying someone with a compatible blood type.
As Heather details in her YouTube videos, she had to undergo several tests across many months to ensure she was a good candidate for transplantation and that she and Roy would be a workable pairing.
The results underscored the serendipity at play: her kidneys were healthy, and she and Roy were a match.
On April 8, Roy received a phone call that caught him by surprise: he had a guardian angel, and her name is Heather. As the details emerged, Toshira filled him in on the Facebook message that started it all.
Step Two: Surgery & Recovery
In the early days of living kidney donation, the donor and recipient needed to be in the same hospital. But since the start of "paired kidney exchanges," in which pairs of incompatible donors and recipients are matched by a computer database so that each receives a suitable matching organ, transplant surgeries are able to take place hundreds of miles apart.
A newer program through the National Kidney Registry (NKR) takes the process a step further. Remote kidney donation allows an individual to donate a kidney to someone in a distant city without traveling to the recipient's transplant center. The program reduces travel and lodging costs for testing and the surgery, and allows participants to recover at home instead of a hotel.
"It is easier for the donor," said Jennie Roggio, BSN, RN, living kidney donor transplant coordinator for Virtua Advanced Transplant & Organ Health. "Heather was able to complete her tests and prep work close to home. The Texas hospital approved her, and then sent us her chart to accept her kidney for donation."
On the morning of June 8, Heather reported to Medical City Fort Worth Transplant Institute, where doctors removed her left kidney. The hospital packed the organ in ice and used a specialty courier service to fly the kidney from Texas to New Jersey.
That evening, John Radomski, MD, and Nasser Youssef, MD, transplant surgeons at Virtua Advanced Transplant & Organ Health within Virtua Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital, received the kidney and implanted it into Roy.
An accomplished surgeon with 30 years of experience, Dr. Radomski appreciates the new lease on life these procedures can provide.
"The greatest thing about organ transplant is that it provides a better rate of survival and dramatically allows recipients to lead more normal lives," Dr. Radomski said. "Dialysis, specifically, requires a restrictive lifestyle and can be quite taxing. When on dialysis, you are essentially asking a machine to do in a few hours what the kidneys would normally do over the course of a few days. It takes a lot out of someone."
Roy can attest to that. Prior to the transplant, he required dialysis three days a week, and each session lasted five hours.
Although donated kidneys often come from deceased donors, Dr. Radomski cites research that demonstrates better outcomes when a living donor is involved.
"The quality and function of the kidney from a living donor is almost always better. This is because we can evaluate the kidney before the surgery and be absolutely sure that it is perfectly healthy and suitable for transplantation," Dr. Radomski said. "On average, a person can get 8.5 to 9 years of full function from the kidney of a deceased donor.
That number just about doubles to 15 years or more when the kidney comes from a living donor. That is why Heather's act of kindness is so significant and deserving of praise."
Dr. Radomski is pleased with Roy's recuperation so far, and Roy is delighted to no longer require dialysis.
"I feel 20 years younger!" he said.
Step Three: Redefine Family
Throughout this journey, Roy – who works as a plant engineer at another Virtua site in Camden, the Virtua Health and Wellness Center on Atlantic Avenue – and Toshira, a child-welfare social worker, had only spoken with Heather via FaceTime. The families pledged to meet in person one day, but shortly after the surgery, Heather decided she wanted "someday" to come soon.
In another coincidence, Heather has an uncle who lives within an hour's drive from Roy and Toshira, so she decided to visit her relative—and her new family, too.
On Aug. 3, Heather and her children arrived at Roy's home and, within moments, all parties felt a rush of powerful emotions.
Roy and Toshira presented Heather with a necklace and ring, which they consider to be a small token of their profound gratitude.
"If we had a million dollars, we'd give it to her, and it still wouldn't be enough," Toshira said. "There's no way to repay a gift like this. You can't even try."
"She's my kidney sister and I'm her kidney brother," Roy said.
The Need for Organ Donation
Roy and Heather's unlikely pairing underscores the nationwide need for organ donors. According to Donate Life America, 95 percent of adults support organ donation, and yet only 60 percent of eligible adults are signed up as donors.
Dr. Radomski states that people who cannot identify a living kidney donor may wait for as long as six or seven years for the opportunity to receive a kidney from a deceased donor. According to United Network for Organ Sharing (UNOS), one out of 20 people on the kidney donor wait-list dies before a match materializes.
For anyone considering becoming a living donor, Virtua Advanced Transplant & Organ Health staff have two important messages.
One: Paired kidney exchange makes it easier than ever to match donors and recipients – as visualized in this illustration from the UHN Ajmera Transplant Centre in Toronto.
"Access to transplantation is a critical need. We have potential transplant recipients who have friends, family members, and altruistic donors who come forward to donate a kidney, but discover they are not a match due to their blood and tissue type, or live too far to travel to our center for testing and surgery," said Christine Palms, MS, RN, Virtua's vice president of transplant services. "That's why we participate in national programs like paired kidney exchange and remote donation that expand recipients' access to the pool of organs, shorten their wait time, and potentially avoid dialysis."
Two: Palms and the team emphasize that those who donate their kidney are just as likely as non-donors to have long, fulfilling lives. In fact, the donor's remaining kidney often undergoes a process known as hypertrophy, in which it compensates for the removed kidney by significantly increasing its own capacity to function.
In an op-ed published in April 2022, during National Donate Life Month, Virtua President and CEO Dennis W. Pullin, FACHE, wrote about the way in which organ donation reflects the best in people.
"Our organs and tissues speak to our shared humanity. No matter our race, gender, age, income, or political affiliation, each one of us innately possesses the astounding ability to save lives," he wrote.
The notion of shared humanity rings true to Heather and Roy, as well. When he is medically cleared to do so, Roy hopes to become a bone marrow donor so that he can help someone else in the way Heather helped him.
"If you look, you will see the good," Roy said. "There are good people in the world."
For The Central Record
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