But ultimately one of the definitions is the bottom line.
And how we feel about selling ourselves and how we feel about receiving money.
Now I'm not talking about selling ourselves in the oldest profession in the world sort of way….
BUT how we feel about putting ourselves forward, how we feel about stepping into our value and really inviting in what we are really, really, really worth.
The trouble is we often have a lot of clutter going on our minds.
Clutter like "Am I good enough?", "Will be like me or what I have to offer?", "Maybe I can't do this"…..
Let's look at how to step beyond all that clutter and really own your power, let's upgrade where we are…..
Firstly let's look at where you are now, where we want to be, and what is stopping us getting there.
Try this exercise to get your upgrade thoughts moving….
Like cake we need a great set of ingredients to rise, to not be soggy in the middle and be an all round delicious item!
What ingredients do you need to achieve the level of income you want? – Make a note of the first 3 things that come to mind.
Think of a particular project or goal that you want to achieve this year.
What you have written to the above are things that you have been trying to do, again and again and again?
Why is it that you are not achieving these very things that seem so logical and sensible to do?
When we want to achieve something, a goal such as increasing our income, we have to not only look at the positives of this but the shadow, the dark side of achieving our goal.
Let me tell you a little story first of all.
I've been working on this for a while but before I started doing so I spent some time visualising the outcome.
I imagined the course had been launched and it was a great success. I really stepped into that scene and felt the joy of that success, the satisfaction of reaching my income goals, and the great feeling of helping more people than I can do currently on a 1:1 basis.
Now we are taught a lot just to focus on the positives and somehow erase the negatives – something like covering up a cowpat with icing…. It's still gonna be a cowpat! So we need to face these negatives head on.
What about the pressure of maintaining this new income level?
What if it meant I leapfrogged hubby in terms of income?
What if I needed to take on more staff?
By making myself aware of these "prices of success" meant I could work out what was really going on in my mindset, and make changes accordingly.
I had to asked myself – would I take the upgrade?
If you don't look at the shadow there is the big chance you will be subtly sabotaging yourself not to achieve what you want. For example, I might not prioritise my content creation, so the date of launch get's pushed back, or I find a new project to work on that suddenly seems more important, or not promote myself fully. All to keep me in my comfort zone, and not put me in danger of potentially getting my negative outcomes.
Let's have a go at this exercise yourself.
Imagine you go to bed tonight and a magic wand has been waved as you sleep and when you wake your wish has been granted.
All the upgrades you wanted from the first exercise have happened.
What this has resulted in got everything you wanted in regard to you, and how you generate the level of income in your business, that one thing you really want to work, that one project you are working on.
It's happened and it is all a success!
What can you see, feel, hear and smell?
What emotions are running through you now you have your wish?
Now visit the shadow and list the negative feelings.
Excellent, you have taken to first step to releasing any blocks to upgrading your income as the first stage is raising your awareness. This can sometimes be enough. Alternatively, if you would like to delve a bit deeper within coaching I work with people to remove these barriers and work on actions to confidently move you to the next level.
You can find out more by booking a complimentary clarity call. I'd love to hear from you.
You meet someone for the first time, and notice that glimmer in their eye. The glimmer that says they see something in you. Something to aspire to, to respect. They admire your look and speak to you as though you can get them places….
You, of course, know you look the part, you speak the part, you act the part.
But that's just it, it's like you have a part in a play and you acting it out.
For all you appear on the outside, you think if only these people knew, if only they knew I was terrible with money. That ok, I'll give you I'm good at earning it but seriously I don't seem to be able to keep it and I feel that I have not much worthwhile to show for it.
If they knew this about me that will see that my success is a façade and I really do not deserve the accolades that are given to me.
I have heard versions of this story many times from clients.
This is how closely how we behave with money is linked to our feelings of success.
So how to you resolve this feeling of being an "imposter". Of feeling that your success is somewhat fraudulent because your finances behind the scenes don't reflect this.
First thing is to recognise that it's not just you that feels this way. Even super success celebrity types and professionals suffer the same….
1) Accept that you have had a role in your success. – you have got yourself to where you are today, with success in many areas of your life. You have made choices with your finances for many reasons over time, and are free to continue to make different choices if you want to do so.
2) Focus on the value you add to others – people value your advice, your helpfulness, your experience. Your bank balance does not need to underline this.
3) Keep a record of your successes every day however small. These are great to look back on. I use Pintrest and have a private board for each month which is a fab visual to look back on, and makes me feel great every time I look at it.
4) Stop comparing yourself to others. You have no idea what other people do with their money! We as a nation do not talk to each other about it, except to paint a rosy veneer. Focus on your own situation.
5) Be completely authentic and say if appropriate that you are working on your finances and your wealth mindset.
6) When you recognise what you are saying to yourself is part of imposter syndrome, then say it out loud to yourself. Acknowledgement and awareness is the first part of change. It makes it feel better because it makes it feel it can and will change.
7) Realise that no one actually knows what they are doing! Like many subjects your money mindset and your finances is something that your grow and develop with over your life, and still there will be more to know.
8) Realise that YOU is a changeable thing, and is changing every day. So you are never stuck.
Here is your first opportunity to overcome Imposter syndrome. Write in the comments one thing about your finances that makes you feel like a fraud. Putting it out there is one powerful step to moving on from it.
To start you off mine is that I have lost money on some of my investments. People think because I have been in financial advice for a long time I must know what I am doing, but I can pick wrong'un just as easily as the next person… There I said it!
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