You (think you are the only one who) can imitate different Ecuadorian dialects and translate regional jargon, such as "arraray", "siffff", or "plena varón".
You're 100% certain your city has the best cuisine, but you make sure to nib at that cazuela manabita, encebollado, locro, fritada, or seco de guanta whenever you come across it.
Whenever you get a plate served without rice or mote, your brain goes WTF?!
Your inner pyromaniac takes possession of your soul when you see an Año Viejo. You've heard of at least one story of a guy setting something on fire while trying to celebrate New Years Ecuadorian style!
You've mastered the fine art of haggling, and if you can't… you'll refuse to pay for something unless it's at least 40% cheaper than advertised.
You've brought at least 3 cellphones and one TV from "la yoni".
To you, a trip to the beach is not complete without granizado or bollo.
You've used the #AllYouNeedIs hashtag several times, because you feel it's spot on: it really helps you describe what it is like to explore Ecuador.
You laugh every time someone says "y le mete las garraaas… en la barriga".
You have that vintage Sucre coin in your room, and plan to show it to your kids when they grow up.
You're used to other Spanish speaking friends not being able to get where you're from, but you make sure to explain we have like five different accents.
You're perfectly aware of who "El Ruiseñor de América" is, and can sing "El Aguacate" from start to finish (even -or especially- when "pluto").
You deeply respect Alfonso Espinoza de los Monteros, and aspire to be as wise, healthy, and eternal… You might wonder what kind of world we will leave to dear Alfonso.
You remember soaking someone's shirt from a car with pinpoint accuracy using a water balloon. Or worse.
You may (or may not) remember getting wasted with Caña, Pedrito, Zhumir, or some savage unbranded concoction.
You look forward to any holiday, because it means delicious seasonal food.
You're used to natural beauty, wildlife, fruit smoothies, and perhaps the best ceviche Latin America has to offer.
Your mom's chancla (or zapatilla) is the wildest form of boomerang.
You're used to "dar un besito o mucha" to people as you enter a room.
To you, "tarde" means past 6am. And "temprano" may mean encebollado.
You can turn any flat area into a "cancha" with 4 rocks.
You never miss a game where La Tri is playing, and you celebrate epic wins with copious amounts of liquor.