I once worked as a Test Engineer at an android factory.
We'd been struggling to debug a new product line, a female pleasure-housekeeping model. The units met almost all the design specs, rating particularly high on the obedience scale–but they consistently failed the housekeeping tests. They all had a irrational fear of vacuum cleaners.
Turned out that some idiot Design Engineer had specified the integration of select brain functions from the Canis lupus familiaris species–the domestic dog–to boost the model's obedience index.
We finally fixed it–although the final product could be a bit balky at times.
Author's Note: Lest anyone question it, idiotic Design Engineers are quite common. Take it from me.
He tweaked the little metal splinter on the back of his neck. It gave him an ice-cream headache.
Everyone googles themselves sometime, but he'd never found urbrain.com before.
Neatly taxonomized were personal opinions, secret opinions, embarrassing memories, family secrets… sexual fantasies. Everything.
Horror quickly took the place of shock when he realized it was updating in real-time, putting online pictures and video that could only have been taken from behind his eyeballs.
Refresh: now it showed him in the mirror, pliers in hand. The counter had gone up – over 12,000 now.
Author's Note: Privacy has become a commodity that sells.
He turned into a roaring lion, then a marauding elephant. Puss barely escaped trampling.
"Of course I can!" the ogre roared, and shrank.
Then a skunk sprayed him straight in the face.
Author's Note: Just because one is big and strong doesn't mean one has to be stupid.
Three dozen boys shifted nervously at the starting line as the Howling Terror snorted and stamped behind its gate.
All the boys except Usias had trained their lives to outrun the Terror. Those who succeeded would earn citizenship on Cadillac-9. Those who failed, died.
Usias smiled and pulled a knife out from under his shirt as the Terror's gate began to roll back.
Author's Note: I've always liked intelligent, creative people that thought outside the box. But more than that, I've always admired that select few that also had the courage to carry their difficult realizations through to realization. Usias is a member of that tribe and I'd be happy to meet him.