One thing I spend a lot of time thinking about is the inner world vs. the outer world. Like, you have an inner world with its own laws, and its own color palette, and I have my inner world, and everyone you know has an inner world, and the basic fact of the matter is that NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW WHAT YOURS IS LIKE.
So in thinking about all of the richness of your internal reality – your challenges, your beautiful views on life, your language style and mannerisms, your experiences – there is a certain pointlessness that could manifest, thinking about the fact that no one – even the closest of lovers, the best of friends, the wisest of mentors – will ever come to know the landscape inside of you. Even with the best of storytelling skills, the most colorful of language, the greatest prowess in articulation – you will always be alone.
Pointlessness is only one reactionary outcome that's possible of course. You could experience depression or excitement, motivation or dejection, determination or disregard. Whatever. The point is, aloneness is magical. Aloneness is true. Maybe the only true thing that ever existed!
But what is perhaps most interesting about all of this is that the only way to get closer to the possibility of knowing someone else or having someone else know you is in the excellence by which you can communicate. Communication opens a channel that allows connection. And in so far as you refine your ability to communicate – a lifelong study – is how close someone will ever get to knowing you.
Yeah, I said it – it's all up to you! I once heard the quote that "the burden of communication is on the one trying to say something." As in, if someone doesn't understand you, it's because of YOU – your approach, your word choice, your focus, your tone of voice, your body language. Not because they're not listening, or they don't care, or they aren't hearing you right. You must focus on what you are doing. You must make them care to hear it. It is only up to you.
You want to feel connected? It's up to you to express yourself. It's up to you to tell your story, make your claim, stand up for yourself… to find your voice and use it.
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Great post, Clem. Very intriguing. I often visualize my "inner world" as a one-sided limit going towards infinity. We each have our own personal wavelengths, and with open communication we are able to make closer connections by synchronizing our wavelengths to the point that they almost intersect–but they will never intersect. In some cases I feel as if others' wavelengths do not even come close to mine. Is this the difference between meeting someone you "click" with instantly versus someone you do not?
And what if one day you find someone with whom you are able to synchronize completely? And if so, what is the reasoning behind it? Do people get along better with others raised in similar environments? It's a fascinating train of thought.
There are times when I feel as if my friends and I can finish each others' sentences and think the same exact thoughts at the same exact time. I have several friends with whom I instinctively felt that I had known or met them at some point before, even though I hadn't. I wonder what kind of similarities our "inner worlds" contain to be so compatible from the get-go.
Anyway, thanks for the stimulating words. Always inspiring!