Quiz: Are you a Moderator or an Abstainer, When Trying to Give Something Up?
Often, I know I'll be happier if I don't indulge in something. For example, I won't be happy if I eat five cookies—and I'm the kind of person who can't eat just one cookie.
I find it far easier to give something up altogether than to indulge moderately. When I admitted to myself that I was eating my favorite frozen "fake food" treat, Tasti D-Lite, two and even three times a day, I gave it up cold turkey. That was far easier for me to do than to eat Tasti D-Lite twice a week. If I try to be moderate, I exhaust myself debating, "Today, tomorrow?" "Does this time 'count?'" etc. If I never do something, it requires no self-control for me; if I do something sometimes, it requires enormous self-control.
There's no right way or wrong way—it's just a matter of knowing which strategy works better for you. If moderators try to abstain, they feel trapped and rebellious. If abstainers try to be moderate, they spend a lot of time justifying why they should go ahead and indulge.
However, in my experience, both moderators and abstainers try hard to convert the other team. A nutritionist once told me, "I tell my clients to follow the 80/20 rule. Be healthy 80% of the time, indulge within reason, 20% of the time." She wouldn't consider my point of view—that a 100% rule might be easier for someone like me to follow.
So...do you identify as an abstainer or a moderator? Do these categories ring true for you?