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 Nancy Kotowski said Wednesday that she hopes the revelation this week that she had a long-term relationship with a priest will open a dialogue within the Catholic Church about its clerical celibacy requirements. 
 
 Kotowski, the Monterey County superintendent of schools, said the "physical aspect" of her long-term relationship with the Rev. Mike Manning ended about three years ago. 
 
 Manning, a prominent figure in the church in Southern California, has taken a leave of absence from his ministry after his relationship with Kotowski, his second cousin, was reported by the San Bernardino Sun and published in The Herald on Wednesday. 
 
 Manning has stepped away from Wordnet, a worldwide Catholic television ministry based in San Bernardino, said John Andrews, a spokesman for the diocese. 
 
 Kotowski said she believes news of her relationship might open discussion about Catholic mandates on celibacy. 
 
 "The reality is that we love the church, we're committed to the church, but I'm hoping a dialogue will open up (about) obligatory celibacy, the whole question of celibacy," she said Wednesday during a telephone interview with The Herald. "Is it right for all people?" 
 
 The Sun story described communications between Kotowski and the priest. The correspondence included their conflicts in determining whether Manning should leave the priesthood to marry Kotowski. 
 
 "We're soul mates, and in any human relationship, especially one of over 30 years, you reach a decision-making 
 
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 point, and our relationship reached that point," Kotowski said. 
 
 Kotowski said she takes exception to media descriptions of her relationship with Manning as an "affair" because she believes theirs was a life-long commitment. 
 
 "It's a 30-year relationship of love for one another," she said. "That's what it was." 
 
 Kotowski, 59, and Manning, 70, are cousins on her mother's side, and did not grow up together, she said. Manning left for the seminary when he was 14, and she was 3. 
 
 Kotowski attended Manning's ordination and first Mass, but their paths did not cross again until she was in her late 20s, she said. 
 
 Both families know of their relationship and have even welcomed them at family gatherings, she said. 
 
 "My family knows him and loves Father Mike. My family knows of our closeness and our relationship, and they're very happy we have each other on our life journey. They know we're kindred spirits and soul mates." 
 
 They are now embracing celibacy, Kotowski said, because she supports Manning's calling. 
 
 "It's a struggle, but we know God is calling to us, so we honor that," she said. 
 
 Kotowski would not say how long the physical aspect of her relationship lasted, nor whether she has had other long-term relationships. She has never married and has no children. 
 
 Kotowski said she is not concerned with how the revelations of her relationship with Manning will play out because she feels she has done nothing wrong or illegal. 
 
 San Bernardino Sun staff writer Josh Dulanay contributed to this story. 
 
 Claudia Meléndez Salinas can be reached at 753-6755 or cmelendez@montereyherald.com. 
 
 
 
 
 

– A popular priest who leads a worldwide TV ministry is taking a leave from his California diocesan duties after revealing an affair with a second cousin. Michael Manning 'fessed up after a local newspaper received a series of intimate notes between Manning and his former lover, a schools superintendent from Monterey County. Manning apparently broke off the relationship with Nancy Kotowski three years ago. "I was living two lives: one as a priest who was vowed to celibacy and another life as a sexually active man in our sexual intimacy," Manning, now 70, told the San Bernardino Sun. "It's very hard when you care for someone, but I love my priesthood more. I admit the fact of my sinfulness. I've done wrong. That's why I've stopped." Manning began his Catholic TV ministry 33 years ago. He appears weekly on The Word in the World on the Trinity Broadcast network. He has announced he's taking a leave from his post with the San Bernardino Diocese, but it's unclear if he'll continue on TV. Kotowski, 59, who called Manning her "soulmate," said she hoped the revelation would spark debate. "The reality is we love the church, but I'm hoping a dialogue will open up about the whole question of celibacy," she told the Monterey Herald.