It can be a sore part of your body or an inflamed area such as your neck or shoulders. Or, it might be your mind if it's full of racing, uncontrollable, negative or unhappy thoughts. Or perhaps it's your skin, your knees, your lymphatic system, your broken heart – just pick whichever part of your body is hurting most or causing you the most discomfort in your opinion.;
, What do you notice when you do this? For most people, you'll find that your body as a whole, including the painful area, tenses up. Be aware that this is a common strategy that we use to try to deal with pain – yet you've just learned that it doesn't work so well!

, This time, pretend that the pain is no longer present. Ignore the pain and tell yourself that you're not hurting. This strategy is like playing peekaboo – first you see it but then when you no longer pay attention to it, you expect it to go away even though it's still very much there. Consider how this makes you feel – does the pain go away? No? You've just discovered another common strategy for dealing with pain that doesn't work!

, Now say the following phrase to yourself, either in your head or out loud: "I am resting for now." Then just pause. Think about what you notice now. For many people, focusing on resting works far better than working at trying to fix something relentlessly or to try to hide from it. Indeed, Dan Howard says that the more you work at trying to stop the pain, the less successful you will be. Instead, intentional resting requires that you notice what is going on in your body and then choose to rest what hurts.


This exercise can be done anywhere – you don't have to stop what you're doing but can incorporate this desire to rest the hurting part of your body into whatever it is you're doing. It can be done when walking, exercising, sitting, lying down, or being around other people.
 This isn't by any means an exact science and it'll require some trial and error on your own behalf to find what works for you. For example, Dan Howard has found that some parts of his body respond better to saying "I'm resting into my " than saying "I'm resting for ". The aim is to find a settling feeling, a feeling that you've landed into deep restfulness for that pained part of yourself and you're releasing yourself from unease, anxiety and discomfort. It's a healing process and a restorative process.


It may be as simple as saying to the hurting part of your body: "Rest". Give it the permission to rest.
 It may take a number of attempts before the pieces fall into place and you discover how intentional rest soothes you and allows you to truly rest to the point of restoring your energy and reducing any pain.
 Rest does matter and yet it is tied up in so many negative connotations such as being lazy, selfish or unaware that many of us are too guilt-ridden to treat rest as the restorative we deserve. Martha Beck points out that we need to watch animals to be reminded what real rest is like. She relates an incident where she was watching a pride of lions resting after an unsuccessful hunt. Instead of sitting around down and low about it (and analyzing what went wrong if they could do such a thing), they sat, purred and rested for hours, surrendering to the need to regain strength rather than wallow in defeat.Yes, life can be hard and sometimes life stacks up all the odds against us and causes us to feel that we never get a break. However, by choosing to rest intentionally, you can heal the scars and restore your energy to face the challenges with greater strength and sense of purpose.
Begin by focusing on a part of your body that is hurting you.
Focus your willpower on the part of your body that you have decided is hurting.
Change your strategy.
Stop trying.
Try different ways of telling yourself that you're resting.
Repeat until this method works best for you.
Be accepting of the value of resting like it matters.
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