Speaking up for yourself may cause you to step out of your comfort zone. You may feel leery about doing so because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. However, if you look out for your well-being, while still being respectful towards others, you have every right to take care of your needs.

When you say “no” to someone, don’t focus on what you said no to, but instead think about what you said yes to. For example, if you refused to let your friend borrow your car because they are too lazy to find a job, don’t think about how guilty you feel for saying no. Rather, think about how you are helping your friend by not just giving them something, and how you are honoring your hard work by not sacrificing your vehicle for someone else.;
, The art of assertiveness is not only about verbal communication, but non-verbal communication, as well. You can practice how you’re going to be assertive when alone. Taking the time to practice can help you gain the confidence you need when it comes to putting it into use.

For instance, practice standing up straight, looking someone in the eye, and displaying clear and direct emotions. Also, speak in a relaxed and sincere voice and practice talking without any hesitation., You can also practice your body language skills to enhance assertiveness. There are a few stances called power poses that convey confidence and authority when speaking. What's more, practicing these poses doesn't just influence how others see you, they will actually change how you feel about yourself, too.Practice your power pose while looking in the mirror before entering a situation where you may need to speak up. Stand like a superhero with your feet wide and firmly planted and your fists at your hips. Lift your chin and channel your inner strength. You will naturally appear more confident and feel that way, too.
Another power pose involves sitting with one leg casually slung over the other and your arms forming a "V" shape with your hands resting at your nape. Try these poses for a few minutes each day and see if you feel a difference in your confidence.
 You can be assertive without being argumentative. The key is to use the proper language. You can get your point across effectively without coming across as aggressive, which increases your chances of being taken seriously.

Instead of pointing blame at someone by saying “You always do this” or “You need to stop doing this,” use “I” language instead. For instance, begin with “I feel upset when…” or “I think we can...” By focusing on you, the person you are speaking with may not feel attacked., You don’t want to assert yourself for the first time in a high-stress situation. Instead, use your new skills initially in a situation that is low-key. Doing this can help you build your confidence and cause you to become comfortable standing up for yourself.

For example, implement your assertiveness on your friends or loved ones in small settings before you go for something big. Tell your friends “no” if you can’t watch their kids or let your partner know you don’t want to go to a party. Get some practice before you take on a bigger issue, like turning down a project at work.
Stop feeling guilty.
Practice being assertive.
Feel confident using power poses.
Avoid using combative language.
Start in less stressful situations.
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