Being consistent means that the expectations and rules that are set should be the same from day to day, and place to place. Consistency gives a child a sense of well-being, safety, and security. It teaches a child accountability for their actions, and helps provide a safe boundary for exploration.


If you're inconsistent, you're giving a child the information that their needs are not important to you.
Having regular daily routines at home will help provide a better sense of security for your child. If these routines are based in your child's needs, they'll better understand that they are valued.
 It helps to get into a routine (for example, taking a half hour walk every day after your child comes home from school). This can help ensure that you spend time with them. Set aside blocks of time where you can be with your child.


If you're really busy one day and don't spend much time with them, make up for it by spending more time with them on a later day.
 Modeling self-care for a child is an important aspect of teaching a child what it means to be valued. Taking care of your health, hygiene, psychological and emotional needs are all part of what it means to care for your own well-being.


Don't remain in situations where you're abused, neglected or mistreated.
Take time for yourself when you need it. You don't have to be constantly available at the whims of your child. If you really need some quiet time, say so, and set up the child with something they can do independently.
If you need help understanding more about self-care, ask for help from a friend or professional.
 For a child to feel valued, they must also feel safe. Safety comes from adults having good, healthy boundaries. The adult is responsible for providing structure and support.This doesn't mean that you can't have fun with your child. However, you must be prepared to interrupt a fun game in order to ensure that the child's safety needs are met.
Consider your child's individual personality. Some children need more structure to feel safe than other children. It's important to meet the needs of your particular child.
 If your child is upset, respond with empathy and patience, not judgment. Ask what's wrong, and work together on brainstorming ways to make things better.


Be gentle and firm about rules. For example, "I know you want the purple car. The rule we set is that you can pick out one toy, and you already chose the pink car. It's your choice which car you get." You can empathize with the child while still expecting them to adhere to the rules.
 Let your child know that even if their behavior is unacceptable in a given situation, you still care about and love them no matter what. Everyone makes mistakes, wrong decisions, and errors in judgment. If your child is learning that they're valued, they'll be learning to make this distinction as well.Reminding them that they will have other opportunities to make better choices is one way of encouraging them to learn.
If your child repeatedly engages in the same negative behavior, consider what response you are providing. If you tend to engage more frequently with your child regarding negative behaviors, they may be acting out in search of your attention.
Be consistent.
Try to spend quality time with your child every day.
Show that you value your own well-being.
Set appropriate rules and boundaries.
Be there for them when they're struggling.
Focus on negative behavior, rather than saying the child is bad.
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