When bringing up the problem, you need to pick the right moment so you have enough time to have a real discussion. If you pick the wrong moment, your discussion may be rushed, incomplete, or come across as hostile.


Initiate the conversation when you are together. Do not initiate it by text or over the phone.
Consider a quiet moment when you have some time to talk. For instance, avoid initiating the conversation in the morning when both of you are getting ready for work.
Try not to pick a moment when the person is using their smart phone. If you do, they may see it as an attack. At the same time, they might be doing something useful (or work related).;
, When you start your conversation, don’t start off with a blanket statement of what you think they are doing. By simply stating “you are addicted to your smart phone,” you’ll set a negative tone for the discussion and might even close them off to listening to your concerns.


Use words that moderate your tone. For instance, say “I feel” or “It seems” or “I think”
Never make definitive statements like “You use your smart phone too much.”, It might help to share the fact that you understand why they love playing with their phone all the time. By sharing this, you’ll put your partner at ease and let them know that you understand their position.


Share the fact that you love your own phone. For example, say, “I’m really into my phone, too. I just think it is so easy to overuse the phone.”
Tell them that their phone is really cool. Say “John, your phone really is awesome. It can do so much.”
Explain that you, at times, have struggled with your phone usage, too. Say for example, “Daryl, when I got my new phone, I was obsessed with it, too.”
Let them know they’re not the only one obsessed with their smart phone – many people are., Perhaps the most important thing is to share exactly how their phone obsession makes you feel. Without sharing this, your partner won’t really understand why you’ve initiated this conversation.


Tell them you feel like they ignore you. For example, say “John, it hurts my feelings when you focus on your phone and ignore me.”
Let them know you are frustrated. For instance, say “Sarah, I get so frustrated when I’m talking to you but you don’t listen to what I’m saying because you’re playing with your phone.”
Pick the right moment.
Avoid accusations.
Express the fact that you identify with their fascination.
Tell them how it makes you feel.
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