Pay close attention to their likes and dislikes. Look for opportunities to talk with them about what they are doing or playing with. Spot the ways that they can improve their play by simple changes that they can make themselves. These changes can be as easy as adding a book for a toy car ramp or where to place their feet as they learn how to pedal their bikes.
 Your child will learn that his or her opinion is important to you. Following through with his or her suggestions helps the child's healthy internally nourished self-esteem to grow (rather than the ineffective externally imposed boosterism). It is then your job to encourage your child's suggestions and to make him or her a very valuable asset to the task at hand.


Say things like: “I’m so glad that you thought of putting the bread in this basket. This will make dinner so much easier.“

, It is much easier for children and for that matter, anyone to identify and want to help with things that they care about and are familiar with. Even if it sometimes means that you may have to go back and “really clean” the areas that you have asked them to be in charge of, passing on the expectations of responsibility for one's own things is worth the extra effort.


When they are finished with their meal, be sure to encourage them to put their dishes in an appropriate place––the sink or the dishwasher depending on your family.
If you want them to clean their rooms, begin with reachable goals, like asking them where the books go and then let them follow by putting them away. The goal is to show them that you entrust them with small independent decision making when it comes to their own belongings. This tip can extend into personal hygiene also.
Help in the house can begin from as young as 3. Small tasks at first, then increase the challenges as the child grows older.
Observe your children at play and in everyday life.
Request your child's input and advice on small tasks.
Include your children in everyday household chores that involve their own stuff.
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