Before you approach your teen about texting boundaries, it is important to consider your approach. Try to think of what you can do to improve the chances that your teen will listen to you.

For example, you could take your teen out to a sporting event or to dinner at their favorite restaurant. Do something that will be fun for your teen and where you can spend some quality time together.
Whatever, you decide to do, make sure that you have your teen’s full attention and have set a positive tone before stating your boundaries.;
, You’d be hard pressed to find someone today who hasn’t heard about how unsafe texting while driving is. But your teenager may not fully understand the scope of just how deadly this act is. Sitting them down and explaining that texting while driving is deadly and setting the boundary of prohibiting them from doing so may help them understand.


You might say, "I know this device seems harmless, but it's responsible for taking many lives. I want to make sure you understand how dangerous it can be to text and drive."
Show your teen pictures and statistics of texting while driving. Inform them that 6,000 teens die in car crashes every year, and texting when behind the wheel is one of the causes. Consider limiting their text messages in your plan and monitoring when the texts occur. Letting them know that you will be watching them may prevent them from getting into an accident because of texting and driving., Your teen may think you’re exaggerating when you tell them that texting can have a negative impact on their health, but it’s actually true. Teens often text late into the night, which results in not getting enough sleep. Not only does this affect the way they feel, but it can impact their grades, social activities, and appearance.


To make this point really hit home, talk about how the lack of sleep can affect your teen’s life personally. Knowing your audience can make a huge difference in how effective this boundary is.
For instance, if your child really enjoys playing football, you might say "Not getting enough sleep because you're up all night texting might affect your performance." Or, if your teen is concerned about their appearance, you might say "I know having youthful-looking skin is important to you. That's why I want to remind you that not sleeping because of late-night texting can cause acne or bags under your eyes, dear.", Most schools prohibit bringing cell phones into the classroom, but that doesn’t always stop teens from doing so. When your teen is texting instead of paying attention, their grades can fall.


Additionally, they can get in trouble for texting, which can earn them marks on their permanent record. If your teen is focused on getting into a good college, explain how texting while in school can prevent that from happening.You might say, "I know your reputation with your teachers is crucial to your college applications. I don't want your teachers to think you're not taking classes seriously because you're texting, so put your phone away at school. Okay?"

, If your child feels like they are a part of making the rules, instead of just the person who has to abide by them, they may be inclined to do what they are supposed to. Your teen wants to know that they are heard and their opinions are respected. Including them in the decision-making process can help to enforce boundaries successfully.


Ask your teen what they honestly feel their boundaries should be. Say, "Let's talk about some fair rules we can set to make sure you get to use your phone, but also make sure it's not distracting you from other, more important things."
Even if they don’t suggest the boundaries you want, getting the conversation going allows you to build respect with each other and may eventually lead to a mutual understanding and abiding of the boundaries., Coming into the conversation prepared allows you to stay on track and get your point across. Jot down the boundaries you would like your child to follow, and then suggestions on how they can still do what they want while adhering to your rules. Showing the child that they aren’t missing out on anything by listening to your rules will make them better adept at following them.


If one of your rules is to not text during family dinners or outings, suggest that they do so right before and after. This gives them time to get their texting out of the way, so they won’t feel like they aren’t getting out the information they need to send. Additionally, if one of your rules is they have to put their phones away by a certain time each night, offer to let them use it later one night a week if they follow the rules for the rest of the days., To ensure that your teen follows the rules, you want to make sure you state the specific actions you expect from them. This also helps when you go to enforce these rules. If they aren't clear, you may get in a power-struggle with your teen about semantics.However, it is important to avoid power struggles at all costs. Try to keep things light and friendly. State the facts and stay focused on your expectations.


For example, you might say, "The rules we agreed on are no texting after 9pm, during dinner, during the weekly family meeting, or during movie night."

, There’s something about contracts that make everything seem more official. Writing up a contract then having your child sign it may make the boundaries more concrete. Sweeten the deal by allowing special privileges each week or month the teen adheres to all of your boundaries.Be sure to post the contract somewhere that your child can see it on a daily basis, such as on the refrigerator.
 Some newer vehicles, like the 2016 Chevy Malibu, come with technology that allows you to monitor your teen’s phone use while driving. If your teen doesn’t drive a newer vehicle, you can purchase programs that are installed into the car that allow you to keep tabs on what is going on while your child is behind the wheel. If this is one of your boundaries, you may want to consider investing in these types of programs., Examine the kinds of texts your teen is setting and when they take place by looking at your child’s text log. Although this method isn’t foolproof, as your teen may delete incriminating texts, doing so shows them that you mean business and you are going to stay on top of the situation by checking in periodically. Your teen may feel violated that you are going through their personal texts, but part of being a parent is making sure your child is safe, even when they don’t feel like that is what is going on.


In addition to checking your child’s texts, become involved in their life. Talk to them regularly about what is going on at school and in their social circles. Know who their friends are and check in with their parents, if you can. Being an active part of your child’s life can stop them from getting into trouble and build a rewarding relationship for the both of you., If your children break the rules, they must learn there are consequences. When you set your rules, it's a good idea to go ahead and let your teen know what the consequences will be for breaking them.


If you set punishments, you must make sure you carry them through. If your child sees that you are all talk and no action, they will likely continue to break the rules knowing that they can get away with it.Reasonable consequences might include losing cellphone privileges for a certain period of time completely (e.g. no phone privileges for 2 days), having a narrow window of phone privileges (e.g. between 6pm and 8pm), or having to do extra chores.
Consider how to talk with your teen.
Tell them about the dangers of texting and driving.
Discuss how texting is bad for their health.
Talk about how texting in school can hinder their future.
Include your teen in the boundary-making process.
Write down your proposed boundaries.
Be clear about your rules.
Create a contract that sets the boundaries and rules.
Install text-monitoring devices into your teen’s car.
Check your teen’s text log occasionally.
Consistently enforce punishments.
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