Doused Italian | PigTales Menu Skip to content Home About PigTalesBlog Who is Brad Pitt? Who is The Little Monster? 01.11.2014 by PigTales Doused Italian Last week, Brad Pitt grabbed a sub sandwich from Jimmy John’s. I decided to write down our entire conversation regarding his sandwich. Here is what happened….. Brad Pitt just returned from Jimmy Johns with a sandwich. (Ugh, Jimmy Johns. “Subs so fast you’ll freak.” Jerks.) Me: Hey. What did you get? Brad Pitt: I got the Italian Nightclub. I had them add dijon and hold the mayo. Me: I didn’t realize it came with mayo. I thought it had olive oil and vinegar. Brad Pitt: Yeah, it has that too. Me: Oh. Well, they usually douse it in oil and vinegar. (said with a smirk and slight look of disgust) Brad Pitt: Yeah, well I looked at the guy and he didn’t look like a douser. Me: Humph. Let me see your sandwich. –Shows me sandwich– Me: (pausing) Ohhhh. Heh. Brad Pitt: Are you judging my sandwich?!?! Me: No. Brad Pitt: Do you want any? Me: No. –A few minutes later– Me: So, is it doused in oil? Brad Pitt: No. Me: Okay let me take a bite. Wait! It has dijon? Brad Pitt: Do you not like dijon? Me: Not on my Italian sandwiches. Brad Pitt: Dijon makes everything wonderful. –I decide to take a bite– Brad Pitt: I love your lady like bites. (said sarcastically as I cram the sandwich into my mouth) So, how is it? (said with total confidence and slightly smug undertone) Me: Fine. Brad Pitt: Fine? I wasted a bite on fine? Me: Yep. Brad Pitt: Are you live blogging this? Stop. Stop now. –I ignore Brad Pitt and continue typing– Me: Let me have another bite. Brad Pitt: For the record you’ve gone from a hater to a believer. Me: Sure, whatever, now, can I have another bite? –For the record, I most definitely did not go “from a hater to a believer.” I still hate Jimmy Johns because they drive like assholes in our neighborhood. And I don’t think you should add dijon to an Italian sandwich. But I decided after the first bite that I was hungry so I was going to cram as much sandwich into my mouth as possible without him taking it away.) HAPPY SANDWICH SATURDAY! Share this: Twitter Facebook Pinterest Email Print Like this: Like Loading... Related This entry was posted in Around Town, Sandwich Saturday and tagged food, Freaky Fast, humor, italian, Jimmy Johns, photography, Sandwich, Sandwich Saturday, Sub. Bookmark the permalink. Post navigation No Salt. All Pepper. ahLove Thoughts?? Cancel reply Enter your comment here... Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Email (required) (Address never made public) Name (required) Website You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out / Change ) You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out / Change ) You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out / Change ) Cancel Connecting to %s Notify me of new comments via email. Notify me of new posts via email. Δ Search Do you like me? 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