DL Hammons: Seek Immediate Medical Attention skip to main | skip to sidebar Newsletter Signup DL Hammons Newsletter Signup for news and special offers about his debut novel KNIGHT RISE as well its upcoming sequel FALLEN KNIGHT! Subscribe Loading... You can unsubscribe anytime. For more details, review our Privacy Policy. Subscribe Loading... Thank you! You have successfully joined our subscriber list. HOME WRiTE CLUB BLOG Seek Immediate Medical Attention Something happened Saturday afternoon that was totally unexpected, but on the awesome scale of 1-10, ranked a 15. All I can think of to explain what happened was that cosmically the planets must have aligned, and I was the recipient of a convergence of Karma points. Whatever the reason, it ROCKED! The family was shopping after our son's soccer game, and collectively our stomachs started to growl. Where to eat? North Little Rock is loaded with places to dine, but my only request was that we pick a place with televisions so I could watch some of the college football I was missing out on. A couple of idea's were thrown around, then my wife blurted out, "Hooters?" After re-directing the car out of the way of on-coming traffic, I turned down the radio because I had obviously mis-heard her. "Huh?" was my response. "Hooters," she said again, "they have TV's don't they?" She was being serious, I thought. Better play it casual, and act dumb. "I think so." So off we went. For the next sixty minutes I was in HEAVEN. The rapture consumed me. I sat there at our table, swiveling my head back and forth like a spectator at a tennis match trying to catch all of the football games on the 128 televisions they had installed in that place, gorging on a juicy hamburger, wiping off the BBQ sauce constantly running down my chin, and did I mention I was in Hooters! My wife asked me why I kept pinching myself. Football, Meat, and Boobs. What a foolish question. When we left, I fully expected to see the following warning on the exit doors. SEEK IMMEDIATE MEDICAL ATTENTION FOR ERECTIONS THAT LAST LONGER THAN EIGHT HOURS. 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