five year and counting , that be how long my wife and I have be marry and she still think she engagement ring be real . well , I owe it all to the jewelry magician over at Gem Avenue . have to get marry be bad enough , but no way be I go to shell out the long green for a relationship I be not even sure be go to last . so when I find out $ 7.99 be all I have to cough up to quiet down my old lady and lock in a cush job at she Dad 's cardboard box factory , it do not take I long to pop the ol' question . Criminy , I spend more on the dinner at Bennigans than I do for the ring . it be that darn potato skin appetizer that put I over . Anywho , she totally go for it , and to this day she still think it be a genuine carat diamond . sure , she only have one good eye result from a freak macrame accident , but she family and friend seem to have buy off on it too . and when the old conscience flare up and I start to think maybe my whole marriage be base on a big lie , I like to tell myself that I be not fool my wife so much as I be embrace a new cost save technology .