MEREDITH: At any moment, the brain has 14 billion neurons firing at a speed of 450 miles per hour. We don't have control over most of them. When we get a chill, goosebumps. When we get excited, adrenaline. The body naturally follows it's impulses, which I think is part of what makes it so hard for us to control ours.
(Shot of Izzie in the kitchen, surrounded by dozens of muffins.)
IZZIE: That's enough muffins. We don't need all these. No more muffins.
(Yet she goes to make another batch.)
MEREDITH: Of course, sometimes we have impulses we'd rather not control.
(Christina walks into Burke's room and begins stripping off her scrubs, climbing atop his bed in nothing but her red lingerie.)
BURKE: what are you doing?
CHRISTINA: Just because you cant touch, doesn't mean you can't enjoy.
MEREDITH: That we later wish we had.
(Burke's parents walk into his room.)
BURKE: Mama... Daddy.
CHRISTINA: Oh...what...
MRS. BURKE: Preston?
CHRISTINA: Mama and Daddy!?
MRS. BURKE: Is this a new service the hospital is providing?
(Christina scrambles to clothe herself.)
CHRISTINA: I told you to guard the door.
NURSE: I had a code blue.
CHRISTINA: I had parents walk in.
NURSE: We saved the guy's life.
CHRISTINA: Whatever, I want my 20 bucks back.
NURSE: Sorry. It bought everyone coffee to celebrate saving the guy's life.
CHRISTINA: I want my 20 bucks back!
MEREDITH: You know it's not Tyler's fault you're a dirty, dirty stripper.
CHRISTINA: You heard.
MEREDITH: Everyone heard. Stripper
CHRISTINA: Oh you're one to talk. Sleeping with two men.
MEREDITH: Wrong. I'm not sleeping with either one of them. Not until I pick one. If I haven't made a decision by the end of the day, I'm flipping a coin. A girl can only hold out for so long.
CHRISTINA: Oh and somehow I'm the dirty stripper.
BAILEY: You two have time to round or are you too busy getting naked on hospital property?
CHRISTINA: I wasn't... I wasn't naked!
[SCENE_BREAK]
CHIEF: You have coffee stain on your shirt.
ADDISON: You have a bed on your couch
CHIEF: Hope you're not hoping to see patients in your sweat suit.
ADDISON: Actually I need the day off.
CHIEF: A day off...for what?
ADDISON: For drinking. I am feeling the need to do some drinking. Actually, I'm feeling the need to do some crying, but my tear ducts seem to be too proud, so I'm going to do some drinking instead.
CHIEF: What no laboring moms today?
ADDISON: No, because I think God knows I need to do some drinking today.
CHIEF: You want to talk about it Addie, or you just want to be glib a little bit longer?
ADDISON: Why are you living in your office?
CHIEF: Marriage... is hard.
ADDISON: Well thank goodness, mine seems to be just about over.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(A 30-something woman sits on her bed, eating a giant cake as the interns make rounds.)
BAILEY: Ms. Seabury what... what are... no I'm sorry, you cannot be eating.
CHIEF: What is all this?
MS. SEABURY: This is chocolate raspberry soufflé cake and it's the best thing I've ever tasted in my life. Except for maybe the banana cream torte there, it's pretty stunning really. Bakeries deliver, did you know that? Please grab a fork.
CHIEF: Ms. Seabury, you're scheduled for surgery this afternoon.
MS. SEABURY: We push the surgery a little? Tomorrow maybe? Oh my God, you've got to taste this!
BAILEY: Ma'am, you have an aggressive form of lung cancer. The sooner we get you into surgery, the better your chances of surviving. So I've heard. It's all very aggressive. I mean, it's very...
(Ms. Seabury erupts in giggles.)
MS. SEABURY: I have never smoked a cigarette in my life. I've never smoked pot. I've never drank. Before today, I hadn't had a desert in 10 years. I am the picture of health. And now...i have lung cancer. Come on it's absurd right? (still giggling) Oh...I'm sorry. I think I'm on a sugar high.
(The doctors take the conversation outside.)
CHIEF: O'Malley reschedule her surgery for tomorrow. And get her a psych consult. And no more food deliveries.
GEORGE: Yes sir.
MEREDITH (to George): Okay...(she nods her head toward Bailey)
GEORGE: So...um Dr. Bailey?
BAILEY: Surgeons don't say "Um" Dr. O'Malley. You want to be a surgeon, learn to speak like one.
ALEX: Look he wants you to talk to the chief about Izzie...
GEORGE: She just baking...a lot of baking, and it seems a waste for all her talent and medical skills to go into muffins. We just thought you might be willing to help...
BAILEY: Stop...talking.
GEORGE: Yes ma'am.
(They follow her to the next room where Derek meets them.)
DEREK: Well, good morning. Benjamin, Ruth.
RUTH: Good Morning Dr. Shepherd
DEREK: Morning.
BENJAMIN: It doesn't feel like a very good morning to me I have to have brain surgery today.
(We see Derek dreamily gazing at Meredith, and she smiles back.)
BENJAMIN: Pretty scary. Plus my sister's nervous, and when she gets nervous she sweats, and the windows in here don't open so it's pretty rank.
RUTH: Benjamin.
BENJAMIN: Was I rude Ruthie?
RUTH: Let's let the doctors talk.
CHRISTINA: Benjamin O'Leary, 32. In for the removal of a brain tumor that's pushing on his fronal temporal lobe. Clearly it's effecting his impulse control.
BEN: It makes me sad everything I think, which apparently is annoying. This doctor looks annoyed anyway. Although it's hard to tell, cause she always has kind of a pinched uptight look on her face. Am I annoying you?
CHRISTINA: It's fine.
RUTH: You can't say it's fine. He doesn't perceive sarcasm or irony. If he's annoying you, you have to tell him.
BEN: Maybe I'm not annoying her, Ruthie.
CHRISTINA: No you are
BAILEY: Dr. Yang..
CHRISTINA: Well, he asked.
DEREK: Ok, Dr. Yang, pinched and annoyed though she may be is going to be prepping you for surgery today. Do you have any questions for me?
BEN: Is that blonde your girlfriend? Cause the way you keep looking at her, you might as well mount her right here and now.
RUTH: Benjamin.
BEN: I'm sorry, was that rude?
BAILEY: I'm proud of you all. You make me proud. You reflect on me well. Grey, if you think you can keep you clothes on long enough to follow up the labs, I'd appreciate it. Karev, cover in the pit.
ALEX: The pit? Wait, I'm off Gynie squad?
BAILEY: Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd is out sick today You can cover the pit where you can... you can tell me who's damn panties are on the bulletin board?
(Everyone giggles, and the entire floor turns to listen to what's going on.)
CHRISTINA: Are those yours?
BAILEY: This is a hospital, people. Serious work happens here. We save lives here. Oh is something funny? Whose are these?
MEREDITH: This is bad. This isn't good.
CHRISTINA: Well you'd better claim them. She thinks they're mine! Claim them!
MEREDITH: No.
BAILEY: Yeah, I know it's one of you. It's always one of mine. Always. So, tell me. Which one of you left your damn drawers on my surgical floor?
CALLIE: Oh no, did I leave my underwear lying around again? I'm so sorry Bailey. It's my bad.
(And with that. Callie removes the underwear, and trots off.)
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: O'Malley, Yang, prep your patients. Karev, pit, Grey, charts. All four of you, do not make me regret setting you loose in this hospital. O'Malley, what I mean by that?
GEORGE: You mean to check with you before we cut any wires or steal any hearts.
BAILEY: Are you trying to be clever?
GEORGE: No ma'am.
BAILEY: Better not be.
GEORGE: Holy crap.
CHRISTINA: The Nazi is definitely back.
ALEX: Better than ever.
CHRISTINA: Oh, Mrs Burke...Hi I'm Christina. I may have said that earlier.. but...
MRS. BURKE: Did I hear you refer to Miranada Bailey as a Nazi?
CHRISTINA: No. Well... I mean yes, but...
MRS. BURKE: You do understand that the Nazi's were responsible for the worst genocide in the history of man. And a racist genocide at that. I would think that as a woman of color and a doctor, no less, that you would think twice about using that word as a punch line.
CHRISTINA: I will think about that in the future Mrs. Burke.
DEREK: Mrs. Burke? Preston's mother?
MRS. BURKE: Yes, and you are?
DEREK: I'm Dr. Shepherd, the surgeon who operated on your son.
MRS. BURKE: Thank you, brilliant surgeon. And a handsome man too. Your mother must be very proud. Do you mind, Dr. Shepherd, if I borrow your young intern for a cup of coffee? I'll bring her right back.
DEREK: No problem. Dr. Grey can cover for Christina.
MEREDITH: I'm sorry?
CHRISTINA: Dr. Grey is very busy. She has charts to do for Bailey. Bailey is on the warpath. Oh, not a German warpath. It's a hospital warpath.
DEREK: I'll take care of Bailey. Enjoy your coffee date, ladies. It was nice meeting you.
MRS. BAILEY: Thank you.
CHRISTINA: I'll um... I just have this one quick... I'll meet you in the cafeteria in a couple of minutes, is that alright?
MRS. BURKE: Yes, I look forward to it.
DEREK: Well this is a change. From the elevator. A little more public, I like it.
MEREDITH: You're married... You're married, and you said things to me.
DEREK: Yes, I said things to you.
MEREDITH: Normally, I would like the things you said to me. Normally I would even think the bulletin board thing was funny.
DEREK: What bulletin board thing?
MEREDITH: But you're married. Which makes none of this normal. It makes me a home wrecker. And I hate that I'm a home wrecker..
DEREK: I'm not going to pressure you, take all the time you need. But just so you have all the information...my home was wracked long before you came into the picture. And I am just now done trying to rebuild it.
MEREDITH: Done?
DEREK: I'm done. Whatever you decide, I'm ending it with Addison. Today
MEREDITH: You have said this before.
DEREK: I know, but this time I mean it. And I'm going to come clean, just as soon as I see her.
(He's inching closer and closer to her face, about to kiss her.)
MEREDITH: You are?
DEREK: I am.
(Callie walks is just before their lips touch. Derek flees. Callie hands Meredith her underwear.)
CALLIE: You guys should think about getting a hotel room or something.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(Christina walks into Burke's room, Mr. Burke is sitting in a nearby chair, reading something.)
CHRISTINA: Oh... um. Your mother wants to have coffee with me.
BURKE: And?
CHRISTINA: She thinks I'm a racist. Oh, and a stripper. She thinks I'm a racist stripper. Oh, come on, what's funny? This is not funny.
BURKE: Well it is kind of funny. She's just my mama, Christina.
CHRISTINA: You're mama?
BURKE: You'll love her when you get to know her. Everybody loves my mama.
CHRISTINA: You... will save me from this. You will save me from this or... you will save me from this.
DEREK: Hey, you haven't heard from Addison have you?
CHIEF: Actually she needed the day off. Something about finding another woman's panties in the pocket of your tux.
DEREK: That's not how I wanted her to find out.
CHIEF: You don't leave another woman's panties in your tux unless you want her to find them. I know a thing or two about affairs. I even know a thing about affairs with women named Grey.
DEREK: It's not an affair. I was going to tell her...Addison...i was going to tell her today. I was going to end it.
CHIEF: Give her some space.
DEREK: No, I gotta talk to her today. If something's over, it's just got to be over. Meredith, she's...she's not an affair.
[SCENE_BREAK]
BEN: Ow! Ruthie I don't think I want this surgery.
RUTH: You have to have this surgery Ben.
BEN: Right. You're very pretty. But you look kind of tired, and I think maybe you should change your hair conditioner.
RUTH: That was rude Benjamin.
BEN: It is?
MEREDITH: No, actually, it's true, and it's refreshing.
BEN: Do you have s*x with that brain surgeon?
RUTH: Benjamin...
MEREDITH: It's okay. Nope. I haven't. Not today anyway.
BEN: I would. He's hot...and arrogant, in a ways that's still sexy. I would totally have s*x with him if I could. Looks like you could. So what's the hold up?
[SCENE_BREAK]
(George walks up to Callie, and looks over her shoulder at a chart.)
CALLIE: Are you trying to seduce me?
GEORGE: I was just wondering... I have a lot of work to do, but I was just wondering about the panties, that are yours, and how they ended up on the bulletin board. Black lacy panties on the board.
CALLIE: You are trying to seduce me.
GEORGE: No... no I'm not. I'm just wondering how...panties I haven't seen before...and I've seen your panties a lot of days in a row now... I'm just wondering how black panties that apparently belong to you and I've never seen end up on the bulletin board.
CALLIE: Wow...you are jealous.
GEORGE: No...no no no.
CALLIE: Yeah...
GEORGE: I'm not...
(Mrs. Seabury goes flying by in her self-propelled wheelchair, screaming.)
GEORGE: Is that my patient? Mrs. Seabury?
(He goes to chase after her.)
MEREDITH: I'll tell him.
CALLIE: What?
MEREDITH: I'll tell him the truth...about the panties.
CALLIE: Don't you dare. He is jealous.
[SCENE_BREAK]
ALEX: So, you and O'Malley, huh? How'd that happen?
CALLIE: I don't know. You're a surgeon, how'd that happen?
BAILEY: Karev, she's a resident, she outranks you. You don't get to ask personal questions.
CALLIE: It's fine Dr. Bailey.
BAILEY: He's my resident, I say it's not fine. is that clear?
ALEX: No.
BAILEY: What's not clear?
ALEX: What's not clear to me is why you won't talk to Izzie. That's what's not clear.
BAILEY: Really, you want to push me on this? Today? Today you want to push me?
(They meet an incoming ambulance outside.)
BAILEY: What have we got Jill?
Jill: Marley Hernandez, 14. Was street lugeing when he lost control and hit a car. Witnesses say he was catapulted at least 20 feet into the air. Landed on a pile of tree trimmings. Broken pelvis is apparent, as are I would guess some pretty massive internal injuries.
BAILEY: You would guess?
(The paramedics wheel out a young man who has a tree sticking all the way through the left side of his body.)
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: Alright Marley, you're at the hospital. We're going to take care of you now.
MARLEY: Hospital? What's the matter with me?
MR. MARLEY: You're an idiot that's what's the matter.
MARLEY: Dad?
BAILEY: Please back away, sir.
MR. MARLEY: Your friends are idiots and you don't use the sense God gave you. That's what's the matter with you!
NURSE: You're blocking our path, please!
(Alex then shoves Marley's dad to the side, forcing him to slam into the outside wall of the hospital.)
ALEX: Are you okay?
MR. MARLEY: You son of a bitch. Where's my son?
BAILEY: We took him in there.
ALEX: He was blocking the paramedics!
BAILEY: No, he is terrified. His child is a tree! Alex, listen to me. You will not get physical with another human being on my watch ever again. You will not question my authority. And you will not defend your little girlfriend for killing a man. Are we clear?
ALEX: She's not my girlfriend.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MRS. BURKE: As you know I'm sure, he graduated first in his class from Tulane.
CHRISTINA: I... I did know that. Actually, I graduated first in my class at Stanford.
MRS. BURKE: Ah. So you are planning to pursue a less time consuming specialty? Obstetrics perhaps? Or family medicine?
CHRISTINA: Oh, I'm in the surgical program.
MRS. BURKE: But after you're married?
CHRISTINA: Married? I'm sorry... married?
MRS. BURKE: Come, Christina. You must have considered the possibility. You're no spring chicken. I don't know a young woman who wouldn't want to marry my Preston, given half the chance. He's brilliant, he's handsome. He's the best thing I've done in my life. He's the most important thing in the world to me.
CHRISTINA: Oh...okay. Oh Burke, Burke! Preston... Preston Burke is here.
BURKE: What a surprise. My two favorite ladies in the same place.
MRS. BURKE: Preston, what on earth are you doing out of bed?
BURKE: Oh... well I... I wanted to... get some... stretch my legs mama.
MRS. BURKE: But you're not supposed to stretch your legs. You're supposed to be resting.
BURKE: Right. But I wanted to have some... some air. Some stretching, some air... and some coffee. Anybody want any coffee?
CHRISTINA: We Already have coffee. Please have a seat.
BURKE: Right. Just a second... coffee.
MRS. BURKE: You did this.
CHRISTINA: What?
MRS. BURKE: Christina, listen to me. It's not that I don't like you. I think that you're a very smart, very attractive young woman. But you're selfish.
CHRISTINA: I beg your pardon?
MRS. BURKE: Oh, you pulled him out of his sick bed because you were uncomfortable. That's selfish. You're selfish, and my son is giving. And the combination...well...it's not going to last. Not much longer.
BURKE: Hey heyyy, hi. Alright. I brought you a scone mama.
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: His kidney's gone. No way to save it.
CHIEF: Just focus on keeping the renal artery under control
BAILEY: I have another bleeder.
CHIEF: Ok pace yourself everybody. We have a long way to go. We have enough blood standing by?
ALEX: Yes sir.
GEORGE: (from the gallery) Is that a tree?
CHRISTINA: His mother rivals his mother. And that is saying something.
GEORGE: They're operating around it?
CHRISTINA: Both dark and evil. You're blocking my view George
MEREDITH: I miss dirty stripper Christina. She was fun. A lot less angry.
CHRISTINA: Next time I see her, if she even looks at me sideways, I'm telling her what I think. She wants to call me racist?
GEORGE: What?
CHRISTINA: I'll call her sexist. Change my career after I'm married? What is this, 1953? She comes at me, I'm going there.
MEREDITH: I think you should. I think we all should just go there. You know, tell the truth. Spit it out. Go with your gut. Follow your instincts.
CHRISTINA: I miss philandering whore Meredith. She was trashy and much less ldyllic.
GEORGE: Do women have two sets of panties? You know, ones they wear for different occasions?
MEREDITH: I made a choice. I'm picking Derek. Finn is great. But Derek...is Derek. And I'm following my gut.
CHRISTINA: Whatever. I want my patient back. You know, the one you stole after mama cornered me?
MEREDITH: That's okay. It's my day to check on Izzie anyway.
[SCENE_BREAK]
GEORGE: You paged me?
NURSE: Your patient was caught shoplifting chocolate from the hospital gift shop.
GEORGE: What?
MRS SEABURY: I've never done that before, it was exhilarating.
NURSE: And now she's planning to leave.
GEORGE: You can't...she can't leave. You're sick. You should be sleeping. Resting.
MRS SEABURY: Preparing for death?
GEORGE: Preparing for surgery there's a difference.
MRS SEABURY: Maybe. Maybe not. That's what they mean when they give you a 60% chance of survival. It means 4 out of 10 people die whether they have the surgery or not. I have lived my entire life, pent-up, repressed. Stifling every impulse, following every rule. And now I'm done. And you know what, you should be too. We should all be done.
GEORGE: So you're leaving?
MRS SEABURY: I'm claiming my life doctor. I cant do that from a hospital bed.
GEORGE: And you know you'll die.
MRS SEABURY: Maybe. But at least when I do, I'll know that I have lived. Mmmmm. Oh God, this is good.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MEREDITH: Izzie?
(The entire kitchen is covered in muffins. The doorbell rings before Meredith can locate Izzie)
MEREDITH: Finn.
FINN: Hi. What are you doing home? I thought you were working.
MEREDITH: I am. I was. I still am. I just came home to check on Izzie.
FINN: So did I. Brought her lunch.
MEREDITH: You brought Izzie lunch?
FINN: When my wife died, there really wasn't anything anyone could say. But the bringing of food helped. It was the only thing that helped.
MEREDITH: You brought Izzie food?
FINN: Yeah.
MEREDITH: Even though you didn't think I was here.
FINN: Is that okay?
MEREDITH: Yeah... it's amazing actually. You're amazing. Sweet and thoughtful. And sensitive.
FINN: Meredith, I don't want to pressure you. You have a decision to make. I want you to take all the time that you need. But I do want to make one thing clear.
MEREDITH: What's that?
FINN: I'm not al that sensitive.
At which point he kisses her.
FINN: So...
MEREDITH: So...
FINN: Have a nice day at work.
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: Mr. Hernandez?
MR. HERNANDEZ: How... how is he? Is he okay? I mean you've been operating for hours.
BAILEY: There is extensive damage. We've had to remove one of his kidnneys and a portion of his bowels.
MR. HERNANDEZ: But the tree's out. I mean you got it out and he's okay?
BAILEY: Okay, Mr. Hernandez the branch is actually still there. We're operating around it which is a part of what's taking up so much time.
MR. HERNANDEZ: His mother's not here yet. Do you think he'll be okay by the time she gets here?
BAILEY: I'm sorry, I do have to get back in there. I just came to give you an update.
MR. HERNANDEZ: That he's still alive.
BAILEY: Yes, that he's still alive.
MR. HERNANDEZ: Okay
JOE: Izzie. How you doing sweetie?
IZZIE: I brought you some muffins.
JOE: Okay.
IZZIE: I made a lot. I was running out of room and I thought maybe you would like some. I'm a good baker.
JOE: Yeah absolutely. Thank you.
ADDISON: Dr Stephens.
IZZIE: Please don't call me Dr.
ADDISON: Okay...please don't call me Mrs. Shepherd. HA. That's funny.
IZZIE: She's drunk.
JOE: This is true
ADDISON: So did you know about the slutty s*x your slutty friend had with my super slutty husband?
IZZIE: You should have a muffin. They're really good...and they'll help you.
ADDISON: I may be beyond help.
IZZIE: Yeah. Me too. Don't let her drive Joe.
ADDISON (taking a bite out of a muffin): Mmm. Good.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MEREDITH: She's still here (referring to Mrs. Burke who is still at Burke's bedside)
CHRISTINA: She never leaves. She never even pees. I'm not entirely sure she's human.
MEREDITH: Finn brought Izzie lunch.
CHRISTINA: Oh you went to see Izzie?
MEREDITH: Yeah, she wasn't home. But I'm taking that as a good thing cause at least the baking has stopped. But my point is, Finn brought Izzie lunch. He's that guy...the guy who brings your roommate lunch when she's sad.
CHRISTINA: So you didn't end it?
MEREDITH: He's the guy who brings your roommate lunch when she's sad. So I'm going to end it with Derek.
CHRISTINA: Whatever. You know, I'm not selfish. I'm by his side. I..i took off all my clothes this morning. That's not selfish. And I'm going in for surgery. Selfish people don't save lives.
MEREDITH: George...
GEORGE (looking through the glass at a nurse who giggles): What?
MEREDITH: You're flirting with that nurse.
GEORGE: I'm young. I'm healthy. I got a life to live.
MEREDITH: Is this about the panties? Are you still jealous?
GEORGE: I'm not jealous. I'm just living my life.
[SCENE_BREAK]
BEN: Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a boyfriend?
RUTH: He's going to keep asking 'til you answer.
CHRISTINA: Yes. I have a boyfriend. Can you look here?
BEN: If I had a boyfriend, I would definitely not be as angry as you. Why are you so angry? Is it because you're frigid? Or he's frigid? Or..
CHRISTINA: Nobody's frigid. His mother called me selfish.
BEN: Are you selfish? Cause you do seem kind of self-obsessed to me.
RUTH: Ben.
CHRISTINA: I'm a surgeon. In order to be a surgeon, a certain amount of self- obsession is necessary. My boyfriend gets that. If his mother doesn't. It's her problem.
BEN: I used to have a boyfriend. When I got the tumer, he understood. He tried to understand. He loved me. But his mother didn't. My offending everyone offended her. And he said he didn't care what his mother thought. But in the end he did care, 'cause now it's two years later and I'm having brain surgery, and only my fat sister Ruth is with me.
CHRISTINA: Benjamin, that was kind of rude.
BEN: Sorry.
[SCENE_BREAK]
CHRISTINA: If the tumor is removed, is it going to bring his old personality back?
DEREK: If we get the tumor out and Benjamin lives, anything else is icing on the cake.
[SCENE_BREAK]
CALLIE: I'm locking down the external fixator.
BAILEY: There's no active bleeding, and the trajectory is clear.
CHIEF: Karev, I want you to hold pressure on the liver. Put your hands down there and don't move. You with the saw, don't make a move until we get our hands on every vital organ around the tree trunk. The parents, have they said their goodbyes?
BAILEY: Mom's not here yet.
ALEX: And the father was too busy blaming him to say goodbye.
BAILEY: Speak when you're spoken to Karev. I've had enough out of you today.
ALEX: All due respect Dr. Bailey, I think you've gotten me mixed up with Izzie Stephens.
CHIEF: All right, everybody, take your positions. Cut carefully. We'll get this thing out in pieces.
[SCENE_BREAK]
DEREK: You see that right there? It's too close to the cavernous sinus. Suction. I've got a bleeder. The brain is starting to swell. His heart can't take it. Yang get those paddles. Move!
CHRISTINA: Clear!
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: Renal artery's collapsed.
CHIEF: I thought you had that.
ALEX: Hepatic artery is gone.
BAILEY: BP is dropping.
CHIEF: Oh he's bleeding. He's bleeding fast. Laps.
[SCENE_BREAK]
NURSE: No change. Epi and atropine are in.
CHRISTINA: Still in v-fib.
DEREK: Shock him again.
[SCENE_BREAK]
ADDISON: I've decided that I'm going to get really fat. Just as a stopgap. Just until I figure out another plan. I'm going to eat all of these muffins, and I'm going to really, gloriously fat. It's over. Over. OVER. I'm talking about the last third of my life, Miranda. How can it be over? How can it just end? Over a skanky pair of panties and... a bad tux? I am desirable, Amanda.
BAILEY: Miranda
ADDISON: Right. Joe, I'm desirable, right?
JOE: I have a boyfriend.
ADDISON: Be that as it may, I don't need me to tell you how wildly attractive I am. Wildly attractive.
JOE: You are, and your wildly attractive cab is here.
ADDISON: It is?
JOE: You told me to call you a cab at 10:00. It's 10:00.
ADDISON: I guess that's for the best, huh?
BAILEY: I would say so.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MRS. SEABURY: Hey. Can I buy you a drink? I have a lot of them. I'm trying one of everything.
ALEX: Hey. Aren't you the cake lady from this morning? Aren't you supposed to be having surgery?
MRS. SEABURY: Well that hasn't been decided yet. So you're a doctor?
ALEX: Yes. I'm a doctor.
MRS. SEABURY: Does that mean you can't drink with me?
ALEX: Not at all.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(George is throwing darts. He misses the board completely on the first shot.)
MEREDITH: George... you're going to kill someone. What are you doing?
GEORGE: I'm working it. If Callie can be bad, so can I.
(He throws another dart which almost hits a seated woman.)
WOMAN: Hey! Watch it!
MEREDITH: George, Callie is hot. She's like really sexy...almost dirty hot. And she's hot for you. In my opinion, you could keep using the darts as weapons, or you could go get lucky with a sexy, hot, dirty girl.
CHRISTINA: Where's he going?
MEREDITH: To get laid.
CHRISTINA: God, you know there is something wrong in the world when bambi's getting laid and I can't get 5 minutes alone with Burke. What are you doing?
MEREDITH: Day's over. I'm flipping a coin. Call it.
CHRISTINA: The brain surgeon should be heads.
MEREDITH: Right.
(She flips the coin, but we don't see what it lands on.)
MEREDITH: Choice made.
CHRISTINA: Oh that's it? You're going to base your choice on flipping a coin?
MEREDITH: I'm taking a cue from Benjamin. Impulsive, honest.
CHRISTINA: Benjamin died. He wasn't impulsive Meredith. He wasn't honest. He was sick and brain damaged. And now he's dead.
[SCENE_BREAK]
BAILEY: Mr. Hernandez? May I? (She sits next to him and grabs an Izzie muffin.) You-you okay? Your son is going to be fine.
MR. HERNANDEZ: He was off with his friends. I let him go off with that thing. I knew better. His friend, he has this driveway up on a hill. I just keep picturing him...i just keep picturing him going down that hill and I didn't stop him. I should have stopped him.
BAILEY: Kids spin out of control sometimes. They spin out of control. You can't...
MR. HERNANDEZ: Yes, you can. You can control them. It's your job as a parent to control them. Ever since the divorce, I only get to see him every other weekend. I never would have bought him that louge. I never would have let him go off on his own that way before. I went soft. I went soft when he needed me to be the father.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MRS. SEABURY: I wish I'd had more fun. I didn't want to be a slult. I didn't want to be a tramp. I didn't have any fun. My ex husband...he had fun. All sorts of fun with all sorts of women who were a lot more fun than me. Nobody called him a slut. Why is that? Men can do it but women can't.
ALEX: Women can. I know some who do.
MRS. SEABURY: Not without being called names.
ALEX: What do you care what people call you? I get called an ass, I don't care.
MRS. SEABURY: I dont think you're an ass.
ALEX: I don' t think you're a slut.
MRS. SEABURY: You have a girlfriend Alex?
ALEX: No, no girlfriend.
MRS. SEABURY: So you're single?
ALEX: Yes. Definitely. I'm single.
MRS. SEABURY: I'm single too. And I'm very bad at this. Never actually had any practice. So..um. I'm going to go into the bathroom. And if I find myself alone in there after two minutes, I'll just touch up my makeup and come back out. But should you have any interest in fulfilling the wish of a potentially dying woman...you know where I'll be.
(Alex follows her into the bathroom.)
Callie is in her room...in her underwear and sunglasses...dancing around. Chief passes her room (jogging I think as he lives there too) and comes in.
CHIEF: Getting some exercise Dr. Torres?
CALLIE: Yes... Yes... Sir. Chief Webber.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(Meredith is sitting at Joe's. In walks Finn, who comes over to her table.)
FINN: Hi
MEREDITH: Hi.
Then in walks Derek, who also walks to her table.
DEREK: Finn.
FINN: Derek.
MEREDITH: Thanks for coming. Both of you, thanks for coming. Here's the thing. I like you (to Finn) and I like you (to Derek). And I thought I had a choice to make I thought I had to decide. But I think I owe myself the chance to consider my options.
FINN: Options?
MEREDITH: There's this thing that allows for the considering of options. In the olden days they called it dating.
DEREK: Dating?
MEREDITH: Yes I'd like to try that.
DEREK: You want to try dating.
MEREDITH: Yes.
FINN: Both of us?
MEREDITH: Yes. I understand if you're not up for it. But, I really hope you are. (With that, she walks out.)
FINN: You bowing out?
DEREK: No, you?
FINN: I don't think so.
[SCENE_BREAK]
CHIEF: You're here first. You get all the best cases. Trauma comes in the middle of the night, you get first dibs.
CALLIE: Exactly.
CHIEF: I respect it. I do. And also I can't have it and you know it.
CALLIE: You're throwing me out.
CHIEF: Got no choice. This violates all sorts of codes and you know it.
CALLIE: I have to go but you're allowed to live in your office?
CHIEF: You noticed that huh?
CALLIE: Yeah, I'm pretty observant.
CHIEF: Guess if I'm throwing you out I have to follow my own rules.
GEORGE (with flowers for Callie): Ok I'm jealous. I have a right to be jealous cause I don't want other guys touching your panties.
He sees Callie half naked sitting on her bed with Chief, having coffee and leaves.[/i])
GEORGE: Great. That's great!
CHIEF: Might want to clear that up.
CALLIE: Yes sir.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(Mrs. Seabury emerges from the bathroom, flustered.)
JOE: You headin' out Dana?
MRS. SEABURY: Gotta get back to the hospital Joe. Kick this cancer's ass.
(Alex emerges...)
ALEX: What do I owe Joe?
BAILEY: Alex... about today...
ALEX: Dr. Bailey, you were right. I shouldn't be getting physical with patients.
[SCENE_BREAK]
MEREDITH: The body is a slave to its impulses.
(Christina goes to Burke's room, where he's with his mom.)
BURKE: I don't know if it's going to get any better mama.
MRS. BURKE: Well I do baby. I do know. Christina, it's late. Preston needs his sleep.
MEREDITH: But the thing that makes us human...
CHRISTINA: I'm sorry Mrs. Burke, I was just coming to see if either of you needed anything before I went home for the evening.
MEREDITH: Is what we can control.
MRS. BURKE: We're fine.
CHRISTINA: Good night Preston. Sleep well.
Mr. BURKE: Hang in there
MEREDITH: after the storm. After the rush. After the heat of the moment has passed.
CALLIE (to George who is lying on a bench outside the hospital) The panties?
GEORGE: Yeah...
CALLIE: Not mine.
GEORGE: Yeah?
CALLIE: The jealousy?
GEORGE: Yeah
CALLIE: Insanely hot.
GEORGE: What's with the suitcase?
[SCENE_BREAK]
MEREDITH: We can cool off and clean up the messes we've made.
(The group walks into Meredith's kitchen to find Izzie making more muffins.)
IZZIE: I'm busy you guys, leave me alone.
BAILEY: Izzie... I went soft. I had a baby and I swore it wouldn't change me. It just...it does change you. I got tired. I got busy, and I stopped teaching. I stopped teaching when you needed a teacher the most.
IZZIE: You couldn't have stopped me.
BAILEY: Yes I could have. You couldn't have stopped you, but I could have. And in the past I would have. I went soft, And I'm partly to blame for what happened. So, I want you to come back .you'll talk to the chief, well work it out. Because you're talented, and capable, and we all make mistakes - and it's enough muffins.
(She grabs the spoon from Izzie's hand.)
MEREDITH: We can try to let go of what was.
[SCENE_BREAK]
ADDISON: I thought you were room service.
DEREK: I feel terrible. I'm not proud of what I did. You deserve better. And I'm sorry about the panties. The prom. I'm sorry I did that.
ADDISON: Yeah. I'm sorry you did that too.
DEREK: Our marriage is over.
ADDISON: Yeah I guess it is.
DEREK: It's all my fault. It's incredibly sad
(Mark walks out of the bathroom... steamy and naked, wrapping himself in a towel.)
MEREDITH: And then again...
MARK: Oh this is awkward.
DEREK: I feel much better now.
Plan: A: a bad first impression; Q: What does Cristina make on Burke's parents? A: Burke; Q: Whose mother believes Cristina is selfish and driven for her son? A: a "mama's boy; Q: What does Cristina think Burke is? A: cardiothoracic surgery; Q: What is Burke's specialty? A: her grieving; Q: What does Izzie use baking to cope with? A: hundreds; Q: How many muffins does Izzie bake to cope with her grief? A: Meredith; Q: Who struggles to choose between Derek and Finn? A: a day; Q: How long does Addison take off from work after pinning Meredith's panties to the bulletin board? A: the day drinking; Q: What does Addison do on her day off? A: Bailey; Q: Who finds the panties on the bulletin board and loses it? A: the pit; Q: Where does Bailey have Alex help her in? A: a teenage patient; Q: Who is impaled on a tree branch? A: A brain tumor patient quizzes Meredith; Q: Who quizzes Meredith and Cristina about their relationships? A: their respective relationships; Q: What do Cristina and Meredith quiz a brain tumor patient about? A: Webber; Q: Who discovers that Callie has been living in the hospital? A: the bulletin board; Q: Where did Bailey find Meredith's panties? A: Meredith's embarrassment; Q: What does Callie see in Meredith and takes the blame for? A: the blame; Q: What does Callie take when Bailey finds Meredith's panties on the bulletin board? A: George; Q: Who is jealous of Callie? A: A surgical patient; Q: Who lives what may be her last day to the fullest? Summary: Cristina makes a bad first impression on Burke's parents and is also surprised to find that he is a "mama's boy". Burke's mother believes that Cristina is too selfish and driven for her son, and is only trying to take advantage of his extensive knowledge of cardiothoracic surgery. Izzie uses baking to cope with her grieving, and bakes hundreds of muffins. After pinning Meredith's panties to a bulletin board, Addison takes a day off from the hospital and spends the day drinking. Due to Addison taking the day off, Bailey has Alex help her in the pit, and they're faced with a teenage patient who has been impaled on a tree branch. A brain tumor patient quizzes Meredith and Cristina over their respective relationships. Webber discovers that Callie has been living in the hospital and tells her she has to leave because of hospital policy. Bailey finds the panties on the bulletin board and loses it, demanding to know who they belong to. Callie sees Meredith's embarrassment and takes the blame, which in turn causes George to become jealous, fearing Callie might have cheated on him. A surgical patient lives what may be her last day to the fullest. Meredith must choose between Derek and Finn, and struggles coming to a decision. In the end she tells them both that she would like to try dating them both instead.