"The Priest in the Churchyard"
[SCENE_BREAK]
(EXT: Churchyard cemetery. BRENNAN, ZACK and FATHER MATT are walking through it)
FATHER MATT: This cemetery has been connected to our parish for almost 200 years. At 3AM the water main broke. Felt like an earthquake. Coffins were bursting out of the ground. (he winces)
BRENNAN: Are you alright?
FATHER MATT: I've had some stomach problems lately... this isn't helping. The last person was buried here over fifty years ago, I don't know how you're gonna figure out who's who.
BRENNAN: With burial records, identification should be pretty straightforward. (she crouches down to a coffin) Alright, let's see. Female, forty to fifty years old, severe osteoporosis. Dress and jewellery place burial around the late 19th century. (spots another skeleton) This one's in pieces.
FATHER DONLAN: What's going on here? Lorraine said you're giving them church records.
FATHER MATT: The burial records, Father, so they can identify and re-inter the remains.
FATHER DONLAN: Those records are my responsibility, Father Sands. You're to go through me before allowing their release.
FATHER MATT: I'm sorry, Father, I saw no harm in it.
FATHER DONLAN: I still run this parish.
FATHER MATT: I understand.
(BRENNAN approaches them holding a skull)
FATHER DONLAN: I'm Father William Donlan.
FATHER MATT: This is Dr Brennan, from the Jeffersonian, and this is... FATHER DONLAN: They can't speak for themselves?
ZACK: I'm Dr. Addy. Are you one of those priests who smacks school children with rulers?
FATHER DONLAN: That's not allowed anymore.
BRENNAN: We do need those burial records, Father, and since this is a federally protected historic site... FATHER DONLAN: Fine. But I'll expect you two to show some respect for where you are. This is consecrated ground.
BRENNAN: When did you say the last person was buried here?
FATHER DONLAN: 1951.
BRENNAN: This is a male, buried no more than five years ago without a casket.
FATHER DONLAN: That's impossible.
ZACK: There's evidence of trauma to the frontal bone. Looks like a fatal assault.
BRENNAN: Arrange for a forensic team - Hodgins will want to collect soil for bugs and particulates. I'll call Booth. I'm afraid your ground was consecrated as a crime scene, Father.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
BOOTH: You know, the priest made a complaint. He said that you made fun of consecrated grounds?
BRENNAN: No, I didn't. Perhaps I was a bit... colourful.
BOOTH: Colourful?
BRENNAN: Writerly. I'm a best selling author, Booth.
ZACK: The victim is thirty to forty years old.
BOOTH: He's an old-school priest, Bones.
BRENNAN: What, so I'm supposed to walk on eggshells because someone believes that a plot of earth has supernatural properties because they waved a wand over it?
BOOTH: It's not a wand, it's a... the church doesn't use wands... BRENNAN: Fine, magic wand.
BOOTH: Magic? Holy water.
BRENNAN: The terminology makes it real?
BOOTH: Okay, you know what, I can't work with you on this case.
BRENNAN: What, what do you mean? The victim was clearly murdered; we investigate murders. Together.
ZACK: There's evidence of blood pooling on the frontal bone, and an absence of concentric fractures. That requires investigation.
BOOTH: I'm not working the whole case with you attacking my beliefs. You should have just sailed off with your boyfriend.
BRENNAN: Funny, a man who believes in an invisible super-being wants to run my personal life.
ZACK: Death would have followed quickly, caused by cranio-cerebral trauma.
BOOTH: By the way, 90% of the world believes in God.
BRENNAN: And at one time, most people were certain that the sun revolved around the earth.
BOOTH: You see what I mean? I don't think this is about religion at all. We obviously have issues, okay, that are affecting our working relationship. And you're afraid to deal with them, so you just lash out at my religion.
BRENNAN: Can't you just be satisfied that if I'm wrong about God, I'll burn in hell?
BOOTH: It's tempting.
BRENNAN: Good. How about we get back to work? You know, I think we both still want to find out who killed this man.
(CREDITS)
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
(CAM and HODGINS are examining the water main pipe)
CAM: So... a shovel hit the water main?
HODGINS: The shovel was found a few feet from where the water main burst, buried in a colony of worms.
CAM: And they say Christmas only comes once a year.
HODGINS: The metal shavings here match the shovel. Someone was digging in the cemetery and broke the water main, resurrecting the dead.
CAM: And why was someone digging up the cemetery at 3 in the morning?
HODGINS: Maybe he came back to dig up the victim.
CAM: Move him to another location.
ANGELA: Yeah, or bury someone else.
HODGINS: Dark!
ANGELA: Yeah, and this place is always so sunny. Here's our victim.
HODGINS: Found casings from Eastern caterpillars in his eye sockets, means he was buried about three years ago. He has kind eyes. How do you know he had kind eyes?
ANGELA: I had to make a choice, so, I chose kind.
HODGINS: And you wonder why I love you. Is she not fantastic?
CAM: You aren't seriously asking me to be a part of this. Get your rendering over to Booth so they can show the priests. I am gonna go re-saturate the dried blood, see if it's of any value.
(EXT: Church gardens)
(FATHER DONLAN is gardening)
FATHER DONLAN: Murder? I don't believe it was murder.
BRENNAN: It's not a matter of faith, Father, the injuries were definitive.
FATHER DONLAN: You ever hear of the sin of pride, young woman? You could be wrong.
BOOTH: Dr Brennan here, she's the best in her field.
BRENNAN: He would have been buried about three years ago.
FATHER DONLAN: I've been here forty-one years. I would know if someone had killed and buried a man in my cemetery.
BRENNAN: You seem quite proud yourself.
FATHER DONLAN: I don't need to be insulted.
BOOTH: (whispering) Knock it off.
BRENNAN: (whispering) What, the rules don't apply to him?
(LORRAINE approaches)
LORRAINE: Have you offered your guests any tea or snacks, Father?
FATHER DONLAN: Isn't that why you're here?
LORRAINE: I see someone wants his roast dry and overcooked tonight. Hi, I'm Lorraine. I'm the parish administrator. I have some refreshments inside, and Father Matt is there if you need to talk to him.
FATHER DONLAN: Nicknames for priests. Last Sunday, he had the whole congregation holding hands. No wonder there's no respect anymore.
BOOTH: Would you mind just taking a look at the sketch we have here, please? So do you, uh, recognize him?
FATHER DONLAN: No, no I do not.
BRENNAN: You're sure?
FATHER DONLAN: I'm not senile. I can name every child I've baptised, every person I gave the last rights to. Every plant on these grounds, over 200. That's aconite, and this is origanum vulgare, and over there are yew trees.
BRENNAN: You know, it was the Druids who first thought of the yew tree as sacred. The Christians adopted the belief, claiming it as their own.
BOOTH: (whispering) Stop!
BRENNAN: What? I'm just making friendly conversation.
FATHER DONLAN: If there's nothing else, I'd like to finish pruning. You go have tea with the hippie priest.
LORRAINE: Follow me.
(INT: Church lounge)
FATHER MATT: I've been here three years. The archdiocese was thinking of closing the parish, sent me here to try and breathe some life into it. I started a sports program for the boys, organised singles' dances... none of this has been easy for Father Donlan to accept.
BRENNAN: So, you don't believe in all the supernatural mythology he does?
FATHER MATT: Well, if you're talking about the holy trinity, the transubstantiation of the host, and the Resurrection, I certainly do.
BRENNAN: But you seem like such an intelligent man... BOOTH: You have to excuse her, Father.
FATHER MATT: No need. God has a soft spot even for the atheists.
BOOTH: (eating cake) I'm telling you, this is fantastic. What is it?
BRENNAN: She's trying to concentrate, Booth.
LORRAINE: It's an orange berry pound cake. I'm sorry, I don't think I recognize him.
BOOTH: How long have you been here?
LORRAINE: I've been here 23 years next month. My mother died when I was twelve, the parish took me in. I've been the administrator for seven years now.
FATHER MATT: Father Donlan basically raised Lorraine.
BOOTH: Right, um, you're not going to eat that, are you, Father?
FATHER MATT: No, it's okay. My stomach hasn't been too fond of me lately.
BRENNAN: Then let's get out of your way.
FATHER MATT: Perhaps a nap wouldn't be a bad idea.
BOOTH: Is there anyone else that we can show the sketch to?
FATHER MATT: Why don't you bring it to Mass on Sunday? We could pass it around. Some of the parishioners have been there a long time... you might have some luck.
BOOTH: Are you sure?
FATHER MATT: Agent Booth, I'm trying to build a community here. If we can't work together to help solve a crime like this, then I'm not doing my job.
(INT: Car)
BOOTH: You know, it doesn't help the case for you to insult the priest. We're supposed to be gaining their trust so they'll help us.
BRENNAN: Matt wasn't threatened, you were.
BOOTH: We're definitely not working well together.
BRENNAN: Because you are bossy and judgemental.
BOOTH: Problems between people, it's never just one person's fault.
BRENNAN: What about Hitler? He did pretty well on his own.
BOOTH: Bones, just... come with me to go see Dr Wyatt, once.
BRENNAN: No. Therapy is a vague and inexact process. The man shouldn't even be called a doctor.
BOOTH: Well, he helped me. I mean, are you so threatened that you can't even do a favour for someone you call a friend?
BRENNAN: I will speak my mind, Booth. I will speak my mind.
BOOTH: Okay.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
ANGELA: It's 7.30, Hodgins.
HODGINS: I thought maybe the same shovel was used as the murder weapon. The metal residue on the skull is some sort of silver alloy.
ANGELA: You said you were going to be finished in a minute. That was an hour ago.
HODGINS: If I can narrow down the smelting process of the silver, I might be able to figure out what kind of weapon we're looking for.
ANGELA: I love it when you talk about smelting.
HODGINS: You do?
(They kiss)
HODGINS: Move in with me.
ANGELA: What?
HODGINS: We already live together, just... just move in.
ANGELA: No, we don't.
HODGINS: You've taken over my closet. It's over half full. And over half is the common law definition of living together.
ANGELA: I have my own place, Jack. I need my place.
HODGINS: I need you.
CAM: (clearing throat) Do I have to throw cold water on you two?
ANGELA: We were, uh, just...
CAM: Oh I know, just try to keep it off the internet, okay? So, I have bad news. We've all been exposed to coccidiodomycosis, a fungal infection from the graveyard dirt we've been breathing. Symptoms include nausea, weakness, fever...
HODGINS: I feel fine.
ANGELA: Yeah, me too.
CAM: ... decreased libido...
HODGINS: I'm listening.
CAM: (laughs) We're all gonna get shots.
ANGELA: Yeah, that sounds good.
HODGINS: Very good. Yeah.
CAM: Thought so.
(INT: Diner)
BOOTH: She refers to God as my invisible friend.
BRENNAN: You're talking to somebody who isn't there. I'm sure that the doctor questions your little fantasy.
WYATT: My beliefs aren't at issue here, Dr Brennan.
BOOTH: Clearly, she's intolerant, and it's affecting our working relationship.
BRENNAN: Yes, he's very difficult to work with. (to Wyatt) Booth said that you could fix us, so...
WYATT: What now is proved was once only imagined. The rat, the mouse, the fox, the rabbit, watch the roots; the lion, the tiger, the horse, the elephant, watch the fruits. The system contains, the fountain... overflows.
BOOTH: What?
WYATT: Oh come now, surely you get the reference.
BRENNAN: William Blake.
WYATT: Yes, Blake is telling us that we're all at the mercy of our fundamental natures. Nonsense of course, but when we understand our natures, we understand the resulting conflicts.
BOOTH: What?
BRENNAN: I hate psychology.
WYATT: As do I! It applies a patina of science over what is essentially a dark and complex set of roiling unknowables.
BOOTH: You see... what?
WYATT: You weren't fighting about religion.
BRENNAN: But that's what Booth said.
WYATT: No, religion provided the flashpoint you needed to expose an underlying issue. I will find out what that issue is, help you resolve it, and set right the balance of dark and light in the universe.
BOOTH: Isn't he great?
(INT: Church)
FATHER MATT: Oh merciful Christ Jesus, wash away our sins...
ANGELA: Shouldn't Brennan be here with you instead of me?
BOOTH: We're dealing with a few work issues.
ANGELA: Trouble in paradise?
BOOTH: Just spending some time apart. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to pray. Thank you.
ANGELA: Did you two sleep together?
BOOTH: Do you see where we are? You don't talk like that in church.
ANGELA: Okay. I...
BOOTH: (shushes her) What does that lab do to you people?
ANGELA: It's just that... this feels like a couples' thing. And now that Sully is gone...
BOOTH: It's not. It's a work thing. So is us being here, so stay focused.
FATHER MATT: ... joy, and eternal peace. Amen. I have an... unusual request, before I dismiss you today. We have Special Agent Booth and Miss Montenegro from the Jeffersonian with us, and they need our help identifying a victim found in our cemetery.
(BOOTH and ANGELA pass out copies of her sketch)
FATHER MATT: Now, I know none of us want to get involved in something so ugly. But as Jesus said, 'whatever you do for the least of these brothers of mine, you do for me.' So please, if you recognize the sketch, let them know. How about you, Enzo? Enzo never misses mass, right Enzo?
ENZO: Sorry Father, I can't help you.
JAMES: Excuse me? Could you give him a beard, make him... heavier?
ANGELA: Yeah. I think I can manage that.
FATHER MATT: James was an altar boy here when he was younger.
(ANGELA finishes altering the face)
JAMES: Uh, I think... does this look like Father McCourt to anyone else?
WOMAN: Yeah, that could be him.
YOUNG WOMAN: Someone killed a priest?
FATHER MATT: Thank you, James. (to BOOTH) Father McCourt was here before me. I replaced him three years ago. I was told he left the priesthood.
(INT: Church lounge)
FATHER DONLAN: I suppose it might resemble Father McCourt.
BOOTH: So much for that sharp memory.
LORRAINE: Father McCourt wasn't here for very long.
FATHER DONLAN: And the eyes are wrong. That's how you recognize someone. Father McCourt's eyes were hollow... cold.
BOOTH: I take it you two didn't get along.
FATHER DONLAN: I was his confessor. You know I can't say anything.
BOOTH: (to LORRAINE) Can you tell me anything?
LORRAINE: Just... he was very secretive. He'd disappear for hours at a time. Some nights he wouldn't even come back to the rectory. One day he was gone. Left a note saying he was leaving the priesthood.
BOOTH: Great, thanks.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
ZACK: I've identified some odd post-mortem injuries on the old bodies. Snapped fingers, fractured wrists, abrasions on the ligamentum flava.
HODGINS: I found traces of gold in some of the fractures.
CAM: I don't get it.
ZACK: The person who ruptured the water main that night was a grave robber. Dr Brennan told me she saw injuries like this in Tibet. Broken bones and bone markings from yanking jewellery and valuables off the remains.
HODGINS: Yeah, which means McCourt could have been struck by a shovel, but also he could have been struck by one of the valuables the grave robber found.
CAM: So our grave robber comes to a nice quiet graveyard, next to a nice quiet church, whenever he's in need of some extra cash.
HODGINS: Only to be surprised one night by Father McCourt, who gets his head bashed in for his trouble.
(INT: FBI Building, conference room)
FATHER MATT: During the 19th century, it was customary to photograph the deceased before burial.
BRENNAN: We have identified these two people. Gertrude Waters died 1873, and Horace Rutlidge died 1901.
FATHER MATT: And their valuables were missing?
BRENNAN: Yes. Dr Hodgins believes the grave robber is working in sections, focusing on the oldest first, where the artefacts would have the most value.
BOOTH: Listen, who takes care of the cemetery? A landscaper? Janitor?
FATHER MATT: Father Donlan does all the gardening. It's, you know, sort of his obsession. Other than that, the occasional parishioner will rake leaves or shovel snow. (he winces)
BOOTH: You alright?
FATHER MATT: You know, I can't quite shake this bug. And I've got a wrestling team to coach, so... do you mind?
BRENNAN: You were in close proximity with remains - you were probably exposed to a fungal infection.
FATHER MATT: Is that bad?
BRENNAN: No.
BOOTH: (at same time) Yeah.
BRENNAN: It's nothing to worry about; I'll have my office arrange for treatment.
FATHER MATT: Thank you.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Angela's office)
HODGINS: That is some serious bling.
ANGELA: FBI's trying to track the jewellery to pawn shops and fences. I'm checking online auction sites. This stuff could net a fortune.
HODGINS: Enough to kill a priest?
ANGELA: Apparently. Hey, have you noticed anything going on between Brennan and Booth?
HODGINS: This sounds good.
ANGELA: There's tension. Ever since Brennan let Sully sail off into the sunset without her.
HODGINS: Nah, I didn't notice. But then again, I didn't notice that you didn't want to live with me either.
ANGELA: Hodgins.
HODGINS: If you are getting cold feet...
ANGELA: You would be the only one that would feel them.
HODGINS: Angela.
ANGELA: We'll discuss it at lunch.
HODGINS: The Egyptian place?
CAM: (entering room) Just got off the phone with the CDC. The fungal infection that we were exposed to from the graveyard is rare enough that they'd have records of anyone who was infected. But I need your samples for the strain.
HODGINS: You got it.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
BOOTH: Yeah... you know, I got no problem with this place. It's where Bones and the Squints get their answers. See?
WYATT: Thumbs in the belt. That's a very aggressive stance... very male.
(BOOTH crosses his arms)
WYATT: Crossed arms. Defensive.
(BOOTH shoves his hands into his pockets)
WYATT: Disdain. But let's not worry about what you do with your hands. What you must do is recognize your negative feelings for what is, after all, Dr Brennan's domain, and verbalize them.
BOOTH: Verbalize them? What, now?
WYATT: Mm-hmm.
BOOTH: This place is too... it's too shiny. It's bright. It's clean.
WYATT: Clean is bad?
BOOTH: Death isn't clean. Especially murder, which is our business. This place is completely fake, it's bogus.
WYATT: You'd like to destroy the entire edifice?
BOOTH: Oh, I'd like to rip the whole edifice down with my bare hands or set it on fire. Except, you know, there's nothing in this place to burn... all the plastic and the metal and the flashing lights, you know, and the arithmetic. I mean, where is a guy, a normal guy who believes in intuition and the soul and good and evil...
WYATT: And God?
BOOTH: Yes, and God too. Where is a guy who doesn't believe in all this arithmetic supposed to stand?
WYATT: So your problem with Dr Brennan is that you don't know what will or will not catch fire, or where you stand.
BOOTH: Heh. What?
WYATT: That's good. Now that's, that's very good.
(INT: FBI, interrogation room)
BRENNAN: CDC shows that you contracted coccidiodomycosis three years ago. The only case in the area.
ENZO: Well, you know, I used to... I used to do a lot of odd jobs around the parish. I'd help Father Donlan in the garden. I'm sure that's how I contracted it.
BOOTH: Nice try, Enzo, but your name also came up on the auction site that was selling jewellery from the graves.
BRENNAN: Which you might have gotten away with if you hadn't hit the water main.
ENZO: I want a lawyer.
BOOTH: Yeah, nice way to get him to clam up, thanks.
BRENNAN: What? So why'd you kill Father McCourt? Did he catch you?
ENZO: I didn't kill anybody.
BRENNAN: Ah, there you go, he's talking again.
ENZO: What the hell is wrong with you people, you think that I'd kill a priest?
BRENNAN: Your record also shows that you were assigned to court appointed drug counselling.
ENZO: Okay, look, I had a drug problem, and I needed money. I saw these pictures in the rectory - jewellery just buried, you know. I figured no one would miss it. I didn't kill anybody, okay? Father McCourt and me, we never had that problem. I wasn't his type. Too old.
BOOTH: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
BRENNAN: I'm pretty sure it's an implication of paedophilia.
BOOTH: I know, Bones, it's... who, Enzo? Who was his type?
ENZO: Talk to James, okay? The kid who ID'd him.
[SCENE_BREAK]
(INT: Jeffersonian, Egyptian room)
(HODGINS and ANGELA are in one of the beds)
ANGELA: So is this really Cleopatra's bed?
HODGINS: Perfect replica. For the new exhibit. We're just making it a little bit more authentic. Your feet aren't cold anymore.
ANGELA: Nice try.
HODGINS: Hey, I thought I was successful, but if you want me to try harder...
(They kiss)
HODGINS: We can't keep our hands off each other. I think about you all the time.
ANGELA: Mm-hmm.
HODGINS: Moving in is the next logical step.
ANGELA: I have a lease.
HODGINS: I have an estate. I'll buy out your lease.
ANGELA: We only have fifteen more minutes.
HODGINS: You said we would talk.
ANGELA: Yeah, well, guess what? I got distracted.
(INT: FBI, Booth's office)
JAMES: I can't believe Father McCourt's dead. I mean, I thought he just took off.
BRENNAN: You two were pretty close?
JAMES: Yeah. I was an altar boy.
BOOTH: Yeah, so was I. I liked our priest, but um...
JAMES: What? Oh, you think what everyone else does, don't you?
BOOTH: I don't know, what does everybody else think?
JAMES: Because we spent so much time together, he was... touching me and stuff.
BOOTH: Really. Because, you know, if he did, and you got mad one day...
JAMES: And killed him? You think I killed Father McCourt? He never touched me, not even once. He was my best friend. My dad bailed on us when I was three. Father McCourt came to my ball games, he yelled at me about my grades, he was the only one who actually cared. It doesn't matter what you think. Father Donlan didn't even believe me.
BRENNAN: Father Donlan?
JAMES: Yeah. About a month before Father McCourt disappeared, Father Donlan came to my house. He said he knew what Father McCourt was doing to me, he wouldn't listen. He was screaming that Father McCourt was going to pay for his sins. I'm telling you, it was scary. That old priest was crazy. He was just crazy.
(INT: FBI, interrogation room)
FATHER DONLAN: Yes, I was strict with Father McCourt. I'm strict with all the priests who are assigned to my parish.
BOOTH: How strict, Father?
FATHER DONLAN: I'm not a New Age priest, like Father Matt. The church should be firm and act as an immovable bulwark in the face of change.
BRENNAN: Actually, organized belief systems which fail to adapt to changing ways are demoted from religions to acknowledged metaphoric myth systems. I mean, no one worships Odin anymore, or Zeus.
BOOTH: Thanks, Bones, I can take it from here.
BRENNAN: You're kicking me out?
BOOTH: Yes! All he can think about now is giving you catechism. I need him to answer some questions.
BRENNAN: Wyatt's psychology isn't working.
(BRENNAN leaves)
BOOTH: Father, I contacted the archdiocese about St Agatha's and they said that quite a few priests have come and gone during your tenure.
FATHER DONLAN: Given who they've sent me, I've done well.
BOOTH: Who do they send you?
FATHER DONLAN: Priests who need firm guidance, for the most part.
BOOTH: In 1997, a complaint was sworn against you for assault. Is that your idea of firm guidance?
FATHER DONLAN: It was not assault, it was corporal punishment. I found an altar boy drinking sacramental wine from the chalice.
BOOTH: And you caned him?
FATHER DONLAN: The charges were dropped. I learned my lesson, and I have never struck anyone since.
BOOTH: Father Donlan, in your opinion, did Father McCourt pay too much attention to James Levay?
FATHER DONLAN: You should ask James.
BOOTH: I did. James told us that you suspected the worst. He was frightened at how angry you were.
FATHER DONLAN: I regret scaring him. He's only a child.
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
ZACK: There are greenstick fractures on the victim's left ulna, as well as his fibula and some ribs.
CAM: Probably defensive wounds received in the struggle.
ZACK: There's no evidence of a struggle. These seem to have occurred post-mortem when he was dragged, probably for burial. But even getting dragged over rocks shouldn't have caused those fractures. The matrix of the bone was weakened. The cause could be genetic.
CAM: Or it could be some chemical or medicine that compromised the tissue. I'll need samples to run some tox screens.
HODGINS: Alright, see these tiny metallic fragments embedded in the victim's skull? It's silver.
CAM: Then I'll assume he wasn't struck by a shovel.
HODGINS: The silver was smelted using the lead reduction method. The flexes used indicate that it's from the early 1800s, probably during the Napoleonic wars.
CAM: One of our old skeletons was ID'd as a bishop. Bishop Jersik. Died 1889.
ANGELA: Yeah, his robes were worth a fortune.
CAM: Let's find out if he was buried with something silver. A sceptre or a shepherd's crook or something else suitable for skull cracking.
(INT: FBI, interrogation room)
BRENNAN: Booth kicked me out of here.
WYATT: For you to say kicked out means that you've acquiesced in the idea that this is his domain.
BRENNAN: Domain... yes. He's good at questioning people. He can... he can tell when they're lying.
WYATT: Can you?
BRENNAN: I've learned a lot from him about people.
WYATT: But?
BRENNAN: It's not that Booth has a sixth sense. There is demonstrably no sixth sense to have. Obviously he reads minutiae of body language, pupil dilation...
WYATT: Yes. You don't sound very satisfied with your own argument there.
BRENNAN: Booth likes to say: there are more things in heaven and earth, Bones, than are dreamed of in your science. That's, uh, a bastardization of a writer named Shakespeare, from a play called 'Hamlet'.
WYATT: Yes, yes, I was... uh, I was aware of that. So, if you're so uncomfortable here, why come?
BRENNAN: Because something goes on in here. He does something.
WYATT: And you want to find out what it is, dissect it, so that you can do it yourself.
BRENNAN: Yes!
WYATT: So that you can do it without Booth. So that you won't need him anymore.
BRENNAN: No.
WYATT: No?
BRENNAN: No! I just want to observe.
WYATT: Surely if you want to observe, you can do that on the other side of the mirror there; instead of insisting on being in this room, with him, out of your element.
BRENNAN: Observation isn't just seeing, Dr Wyatt, it's experiencing. Ideally I prefer being inside Booth's head. You know, seeing and feeling things the way he does. Then maybe I'd understand.
WYATT: Be one with him.
BRENNAN: In a scientific sense.
(Her cell phone rings)
BRENNAN: Booth needs me. Hodgins has a line on the murder weapon.
WYATT: Ta-ta then. We're done here.
BRENNAN: Thanks.
(INT: Church)
BRENNAN: We need to know what artefacts were buried with Bishop Jersik.
BOOTH: You see, there was no photograph of his burial in the paperwork that we received.
LORRAINE: Well, I'm not allowed to pull interment records with Father Donlan's permission. Where is she going?
BOOTH: Bones! You are approaching the altar - very sensitive area.
BRENNAN: Right.
BOOTH: Listen, you must have known Father McCourt pretty well. Did him and Father Matt have similar tastes?
LORRAINE: Look, the only similarity I know of is that they were from the same seminary.
BOOTH: Same seminary?
LORRAINE: Agent Booth, there's so much suspicion and innuendo these days. This is a good parish. The Father makes sure of that.
BRENNAN: What's that?
LORRAINE: It's the chalice!
BOOTH: Oh no, it's the vessel in which the wine is transformed into the blood of Christ... don't touch it, no...
BRENNAN: It is going to be touched, Booth - it's silver and these little eagles are a common Napoleonic motif.
BOOTH: You're saying that it's possible that this could be, uh, a murder weapon?
BRENNAN: Yeah. Can we take this with us, or do we need to serve a warrant on God?
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
HODGINS: It's a match. The silver fragments in Father McCourt's skull came from that chalice.
ANGELA: Well that officially looks the least like a murder weapon than any murder weapon I've seen.
ZACK: The green bone response indicated that the injury was inflicted peri-mortem. That means he might have already been dead when he was struck.
HODGINS: So, we have no cause of death?
CAM: Yes we do. McCourt was poisoned. An alkaloid called taxine.
ANGELA: Could it have been accidental?
CAM: Not at these concentrations.
HODGINS: Alright, I'll go compile a list of possible sources of the poison at the church.
(INT: Church, hall - wrestling practice)
BRENNAN: So what if they went to the same seminary?
BOOTH: Well, then why didn't Father Matt mention it, huh? What else is he not saying?
BRENNAN: This is intuition, right? You're subconsciously recalling pupil dilation, or some pheromones?
BOOTH: You know what, we're not talking the same language here.
FATHER MATT: No, no, no. That's not a butcher. Come here, Tony.
TONY: Why do you always pick me, Father? Take Sam.
FATHER MATT: Let's go. Watch.
(He shows the boys how to perform a wrestling move)
FATHER MATT: Now from here, Tony can reach around to my right arm, uses his left knee against my left hip, and... see? Tony's in control. I'm helpless, and he can score some back points. Good job, Tony. Let me up. That's the butcher. Learn it. Love it. Use it to smite your enemies in the name of our loving Lord. Pair up, get it right.
(FATHER MATT joins BOOTH & BRENNAN)
FATHER MATT: Phew. Kid took me down for real. That shot must not be working, Doc. So... what can I do for you today?
BOOTH: Yeah, Father, I...
BRENNAN: You and Father McCourt were in seminary at the same time.
FATHER MATT: Right. But I told you, I never met Father McCourt.
BOOTH: What, you guys never got together, compared wrestling moves?
FATHER MATT: I didn't know him there. Did you know everyone who went to your college?
BOOTH: You do know why Father McCourt was sent here?
FATHER MATT: Yeah, I've heard the rumours, that's all. Do you base all your investigations on rumours, Agent Booth?
BRENNAN: He has a point, Booth.
BOOTH: You know, St Agatha's has been a dumping ground for troubled priests for some time, so it's reasonable to suggest that... you're one of them?
FATHER MATT: I told you why I was sent here. I got work to do.
(INT: Diner)
BRENNAN: So you still think Father Donlan is the killer? I mean, Matt could have killed McCourt and taken his post?
BOOTH: Why?
BRENNAN: Because McCourt was going to come clean about being a paedophile, maybe accuse Matt if they knew each other? Of course, there's no evidence of that. I have no intuition.
BOOTH: None. Zilch.
BRENNAN: You have no analytical skills. I mean, you're all about emotion and feeling.
BOOTH: Well...
BRENNAN: They say that means you have a well developed feminine side.
BOOTH: Who says that?
BRENNAN: Psychologists.
BOOTH: Oh...
BRENNAN: What? You're the one who believes in them.
BOOTH: Let's just stick to the case. We know that Father Donlan is this harsh, judgemental guy who keeps being sent these problematic priests. There's McCourt, there's Father Matt...
BRENNAN: No proof.
BOOTH: Yeah, but Bones, it happens, alright? Anyways, Father Donlan, he's getting old, he can't deal, so he takes action.
BRENNAN: Old Testament action?
BOOTH: Alright, there you go again, you're attacking God.
BRENNAN: I am not attacking God, he doesn't exist, so how can... religion is part of...
BOOTH: (speaking over her) Unbelievable, you know, God is not...
WYATT: Quarrelling? Yes, of course you are. Uh, cup of coffee please, dearie darling. I am here to put right what has been rent asunder.
BOOTH: Great, he's figured out our problem.
WYATT: Yes.
BRENNAN: From three meetings?
WYATT: I knew what your problem was right off the bat, if you'll forgive the cricketing metaphor. The meetings were for fun. Booth never knows where to stand when he's in the lab, feels like teats on a bull whenever he's there. Ditto Dr Brennan in the interrogation room. Simple geography, sense of belonging, et cetera.
BOOTH: But that's not the main problem.
BRENNAN: He can't possibly know.
WYATT: Yes I do. You're both afraid that the reason Dr Brennan didn't sail off into the sunset with her boyfriend Sully might have been because of her ties to Agent Booth. You are both quite wrong.
BRENNAN: Why didn't I go with Sully?
BOOTH: How's he supposed to know?
BRENNAN: Sully is perfect! We communicated well, the s*x was incredible, he invited me to sail around the South Seas in a beautiful yacht for a year. I mean, why would anyone turn that down?
WYATT: In my opinion, you are unable to lead a purposeless life at this stage in your psychosocial development. Which, by the way, is an issue you should address, because a certain amount of purposelessness is necessary to lead a full life.
BRENNAN: I hate psychology.
BOOTH: You don't like it because he's saying that all this tension between me and you is... your fault.
WYATT: Mmm, on the contrary. If anything, your issues are more pronounced, given that your behaviour is being affected by what turns out to be a quite irrational fear of being responsible for someone else's destiny.
BRENNAN: That makes sense.
BOOTH: Oh, now you like psychology.
WYATT: I think you'll both be able to work together just fine, now that your minds have been set at ease. And thank you, dear. Ta-ta then.
(WYATT leaves)
BOOTH: You, uh, feel anything?
BRENNAN: Feel?
BOOTH: Yeah, you must... feel something.
BRENNAN: I do. You know what I feel? Father Matt has been sick a long time.
BOOTH: He got treated for the fungus.
BRENNAN: But he hasn't shown any sighs of recovery.
BOOTH: So?
BRENNAN: I feel that's weird. I mean, his symptoms should have cleared up by now. I feel that since Father McCourt was poisoned...
BOOTH: We should have Father Matt checked for the same poison. Ahhh.
BRENNAN: What?
BOOTH: We're back!
BRENNAN: We're back!
(INT: Jeffersonian, Medico Legal Lab)
FATHER MATT: Poisoned?
CAM: Yes, Father, by something called taxine.
FATHER MATT: Father McCourt was poisoned?
HODGINS: The poison's easily derived from boiling yew tree needles.
FATHER MATT: We have yew trees at St Agatha's.
CAM: Symptoms include nausea, vomiting, increased salivation, stomach ache, diarrhoea, spasms and death.
FATHER MATT: Well, I have all of those. Except for death.
HODGINS: So far.
CAM: We suspect the poison weakened him, made him unable to defend himself.
FATHER MATT: Defend himself from whom?
HODGINS: Someone much weaker than himself.
CAM: Say, an old man.
(HODGINS tests a sample)
HODGINS: Yellow.
FATHER MATT: Yellow, what does that mean?
CAM: The good news is, we know how to make you feel a lot better.
HODGINS: The bad news is someone's trying to kill you.
(INT: Jeffersonian, floor area)
ANGELA: So things are alright?
BRENNAN: According to the psychiatrist, we were both concerned that Booth was the reason that I didn't run off with Sully.
ANGELA: It wasn't?
BRENNAN: No, it's because I'm currently unable to live a life without tangible focus, so, you know, sailing around paradise with a man I adore...
ANGELA: And you believe that?
BRENNAN: Well, if I expect people to defer to me as an anthropologist, I have to concede to their fields of expertise.
ANGELA: Right.
BRENNAN: And our working relationship has definitely improved, so...
ANGELA: Mmm. Maybe I should talk to this guy.
BRENNAN: Why?
ANGELA: Hodgins asked me to move in with him, but I'm... I'm not sure. I mean, what's the problem? Hodgins is perfect. I'm nuts about him.
BRENNAN: I'll call the doctor.
(INT: FBI, conference room)
FATHER DONLAN: I'm certain that I'm innocent of whatever it is you think I did this time.
BRENNAN: Can you identify this clipping, sir?
FATHER DONLAN: Taxus baccata. European, or common, yew.
BOOTH: Then you're aware that it's poisonous?
FATHER DONLAN: Did you bring me here to test my botanical knowledge?
BRENNAN: Both Father McCourt and Father Matt suffered yew poisoning.
FATHER DONLAN: The hell, you say.
BRENNAN: Is he allowed to say that?
BOOTH: Dr Brennan's people can prove that the poison from the yew tree came from your own yard.
FATHER DONLAN: Both Fathers McCourt and Sands?
BRENNAN: It's why Father Matt has been so sick.
BOOTH: Can you think of anyone else who'd want to poison these two priests, aside from you?
FATHER DONLAN: No. No one. I'm going to need a lawyer. That damn Jesuit would be best.
BOOTH: Are you confessing, Father?
FATHER DONLAN: Yes. I did it.
(BOOTH just stares at him)
BRENNAN: What?
BOOTH: When this goes to trial, Father, you're going to have to place your hand on the Holy Bible and swear to God to tell the truth. Are you going to be able to do that?
BRENNAN: What's going on?
FATHER DONLAN: Get me my lawyer.
BOOTH: See, I don't think you will.
BRENNAN: Why?
BOOTH: You didn't do it. See, it's time to render unto Caesar.
FATHER DONLAN: On one condition. I take the confession.
(INT: FBI, interrogation room)
LORRAINE: I never set out to kill Father McCourt.
FATHER DONLAN: You poisoned him.
LORRAINE: I saw the way he looked at James Levay. I tried to give him just enough poison to make him too sick to want to... but he, he fell and hit his head. He wasn't breathing. I had to make sure he was dead. I couldn't bury him without making sure.
(BRENNAN and BOOTH are watching from behind the glass)
BRENNAN: The heaviest thing she could find was the chalice.
FATHER DONLAN: And Father Matt?
LORRAINE: Wrestling! The boys were all over him. And I knew better this time.
FATHER DONLAN: Less poison.
LORRAINE: Father McCourt was a mistake, Father, I...
FATHER DONLAN: Lorraine. There was no proof that Father McCourt touched anyone. Only rumours. And Father Matt...
LORRAINE: But you - you were so angry at Father Matt. I see the way you look at him.
FATHER DONLAN: Because he was sent here to replace me. What you saw was my own pride, my own weakness. Father Matt is a good man.
LORRAINE: I was trying to help. I was just trying to help. Do you absolve me, Father?
FATHER DONLAN: We're not alone with God, Lorraine. This is not that kind of confession.
(INT: Diner)
(BRENNAN and ANGELA find DR WYATT)
BRENNAN: Dr Wyatt? We need you to do it with her.
WYATT: W-would that I could, but uh, unfortunately my heart belongs to another.
ANGELA: No, it's actually my boyfriend... asked me to move in with him, and I need to know if I should or not.
BRENNAN: I told her to come talk to you.
WYATT: Look, I absolutely refuse to be relegated to the role of some sort of advice columnist, or daytime television shrink.
ANGELA: Well, Brennan says that you are the only psychological type who's ever made any sense to her.
WYATT: Yes, well, now of course you're flattering me, so obviously I'm helpless. Alright, so, what made you think you should move with him in the first place?
BRENNAN: The closet test.
ANGELA: Over half of his closet is filled with my things.
WYATT: I see, and what about your own closet? It overfloweth with his things, does it?
ANGELA: Uh, no. It doth not.
WYATT: Well then, I suggest you wait until it does, thus rendering you manifest equals. Tabling until that day, the vexed question of who should move in with whom.
ANGELA: He is good.
BRENNAN: I told you.
WYATT: As a stopgap, you should remove enough clothing from his closet, so as to occupy less than thirty percent of the space.
ANGELA: You know, the accent makes everything that you say sound really smart. (to BRENNAN, in a fake British accent) "Stop-gap".
(BRENNAN gets up)
WYATT: Oh, you're not leaving, are you Dr Brennan?
BRENNAN: Uh, Booth and I have to put our notes together for the prosecutor, so...
WYATT: And so, you and Booth, you making any further assumptions about each other?
BRENNAN: No. No assumptions. Thanks. (she leaves)
WYATT: Good.
ANGELA: Look at that. You fixed them too.
WYATT: Hmmm.
ANGELA: Alright, listen up, Monty Python. You got it right with Hodgins and I, that's fine. But we both know that you are full of it on the other thing.
WYATT: I have no idea to what you refer.
ANGELA: Brennan didn't run off with Sully because she cannot live a life without focus. She stayed because of Booth.
WYATT: Ah, now you're projecting, Ms Montenegro. Agent Booth and Dr Brennan are not you and Dr Hodgins. I stand by my diagnosis.
ANGELA: You stand by the FBI. Your first priority is to get agents back into the field, solving murders.
WYATT: Mmm. Your romanticism is endearing, but as the Bard says, "lovers and madmen have such seething brains, such shaking fantasies, that apprehend more than cool reason ever comprehends."
ANGELA: He also says "journeys end in lovers meeting, every wise man's son doth know."
(Behind them, outside the diner, BRENNAN gets into the car with BOOTH)
WYATT: Hmmm. Excellent.
ANGELA: You betcha. Monty.
WYATT: You are good.
Plan: A: Brennan; Q: Who believes one of the bodies was buried five years ago with no coffin? A: Brennan and Zack examine corpses; Q: What do Brennan and Zack do? A: their coffins; Q: What have the corpses spilled out of? A: a burst water main; Q: What caused the corpses to spill out of their coffins? A: St. Agatha; Q: What church grounds are the bodies in the cemetery on? A: the individual bodies; Q: What do Brennan and Zack identify to be put back in their proper place? A: one skeleton; Q: What is out of place in the cemetery? A: Father Donlan; Q: Who runs the church? A: at least 50 years; Q: How long had the bodies been buried for? A: the validity; Q: What do Booth and Brennan argue about religion? Summary: Brennan and Zack examine corpses, which have been spilled out of their coffins, due to a burst water main in an old cemetery on the St. Agatha church grounds. However, as they identify the individual bodies to be put back in their proper place, they find one skeleton that is out of place. Father Donlan, who runs the church, says all these bodies had been buried for at least 50 years and yet Brennan believes one of them was buried five years ago with no coffin. When it is confirmed the deceased was murdered, Booth and Brennan investigate the priests and administrator of the church and argue about the validity of religion.