Hawking: That's nice. Hawking: You made an arithmetic mistake on page two. He wants to meet you. He was really impressed. Howard: Give me a compliment. Howard: He's coming to the university for a couple weeks to lecture, and he's looking for an engineer to help maintain the equipment on his wheelchair. Howard: I gave it to him three days ago. Howard: No, about my job. It's just that what you do is not worth doing. Just give him my paper on the Higgs boson. Leonard: Still going to introduce him? Mee-Maw's forks never had that. Please let Professor Hawking know that I'm available at his earliest convenience. Raj: Bring him to his bony knees. Sheldon: All right, then. Sheldon: Because if I don't, he won't give my paper to Stephen Hawking. Sheldon: Do you understand how important Hawking is to me? Sheldon: I want you to tell me that Howard is being mean to me for no reason. Sheldon: Leonard, do you recall when I said that I was going to revolutionize humanity's understanding of the Higgs boson particle, and you said, Sheldon, it's two a.m., get out of my bedroom? Sheldon: Now will you give my paper to Hawking? This is Stephen Hawking. You've heard him tease me about not having a doctorate.
Plan: A: Stephen Hawking's motorized wheelchair; Q: What is Howard hired to maintain? A: Caltech; Q: Where is Stephen Hawking guest lecturing? A: Sheldon; Q: Who faints when Hawking tells him that his paper is wrong? A: his idol; Q: What does Sheldon consider Hawking? A: a doctorate; Q: What does Sheldon want to see Howard get? A: the Higgs boson; Q: What paper does Sheldon want to give to Hawking? A: several embarrassing tasks; Q: What does Sheldon agree to do for Howard in exchange for his paper? A: his job; Q: What does Sheldon feel Howard is not good at? A: his backhanded compliment; Q: What does Howard accept from Sheldon? A: three days ago; Q: How long ago did Howard give Hawking his paper? A: an arithmetic mistake; Q: What did Hawking say caused Sheldon to faint? Summary: Howard is hired to maintain Stephen Hawking's motorized wheelchair while he is guest-lecturing at Caltech. He plans to introduce Sheldon to Hawking (Sheldon considers Hawking his idol) until Sheldon insults him yet again about his lack of a doctorate. Sheldon pleads with Howard to introduce him to Hawking, to no avail. He then asks him to give his paper on the Higgs boson to Hawking, to which he agrees, but only if he does several embarrassing tasks for him. Howard then asks him to give him a compliment about his job. Sheldon replies that he never said that Howard is bad at his job, he just feels that his job is not worth doing. Howard accepts his backhanded compliment and reveals that he had already given Hawking his paper three days ago and that he wants to meet him. Hawking is very impressed with Sheldon's paper, but then mentions that he had made an arithmetic mistake as a result of which the entire paper is wrong. At this, a shocked Sheldon faints.