"I'm really trying to do the right thing. I am," he says. "Even when it's not clear what that is." He's trying to figure out what is good and what is moral on his own, which has left him struggling to find himself. He is so dedicated to those friends that he is beginning to disappear. While he is fighting for his friends, his subconscious is struggling to be heard. It's then there is a question of whether it's coming out in ways he may not even know yet.