Empathy is the trait that allows us to intuit what others are feeling, and caring about people who are not you is crucial to being a decent human being. But if you’re too empathetic, it’s practically a handicap — and it’s a sign you care a little too much what others think of you, explains NYC-based therapist Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW, editor of the anthology How Does That Make You Feel? True Confessions from Both Sides of the Couch . “As humans, we make things about us,” she says, explaining that when we see a person experiencing something, of course we think about what it must feel like to be them. So that explains why I wanted to weep into my coffee this morning for the people who won the biggest Oscar last night but then immediately lost it.