Steve is my best friend and I'm thrilled that we're going to spend our lives together. It's great to know that so many people are here to celebrate the occasion and share in our joy. But, this essay aside, I'm a very private person and it's been hard to invite 150 people into our relationship. I understand that these people are here to support us, but being mushy, in private or in public, has never been part of who I am.And while I'm happy to do wedding planning my way, sometimes, I do feel like I'm not a "good" bride for not being more romantic. For so many people, being romantic comes naturally — their love is evident from their photos, wedding vows, and Facebook posts. Spending holidays with my family is sometimes challenging — my sister and her boyfriend are very romantic and my extended family gushes over them. I'm sure they wish I were more like her in that regard, and sometimes, it feels like my relationship is somehow less real than hers, even though I'm getting married first.But in the end, none of that matters, because it doesn't impact my relationship. It's not the picture-perfect idea of romance that the wedding industry sells, but it works for us. Steve and I are happier together than we are apart, which is really what everyone's looking for in a relationship, right?The last time I wrote an article about my engagement, the internet didn't take it well. My story was picked up by conservative blogs that mocked me for ruining romance and accused me of generally being a feminist killjoy. Many of the comments encouraged Steve to get out while he still could. It baffles me that these people — like the acquaintances I haven't spoken to in years and random vendors at bridal shows — are so invested in my relationship. My approach to planning my wedding isn't going to take down the wedding industry or uproot longstanding wedding traditions.The industry thrives on these ideas of perfect romance — a $2,000 cinematic video set to a Jason Mraz song, a blinged-out dress that costs more than several months' rent, elaborate love-themed favors and decorations. I'd love to have a wedding that guests will enjoy and have some great photos to remember it, but our relationship — and the lifetime ahead — is more important to me than the industry's theatrics. A wedding lasts a day; a marriage lasts (hopefully!) a lifetime. For us, being friends, partners, and companions is the strength of our relationship. And if that comes at the expense of fitting into someone else's idea of picture-perfect romance, so be it.