Five full minutes after sitting down to write a story about why Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian is a no good, very bad show, I still hadn’t found a first sentence. That’s because there is no one sentence — nay, paragraph — which can wholly summarise why Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian is hateful, base, and boring garbage. There are so many reasons, the mind reels. Still, having watched the first episode, I can only conclude that this show will be shredded to ribbons by media critics as well as body positive finger-waggers (like yours truly). But I am also just as sure that the show will be watched by millions. It will be popular amongst hate-watchers, sincere Kardashian die-hards, and more importantly, people who believe on some level that their worth is inextricably linked to their physical appearance. And let’s be real: That last group is basically all of us. That’s why it’s worth sitting down and pointing out precisely what is wrong with Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian and why you absolutely should not watch it. So strap in, people.