First, don’t take it personally. Try to look at the conflict as objectively as possible. What was the aggressor trying to achieve? Ask yourself whether you’re dealing with a one-time incident with a specific trigger, or if this behavior is likely to repeat itself and keep dragging you down. If you’re sure it’s a single episode, there may not be much you need to do now other than avoiding this person in the future.

Second, consider killing her with kindness. If you know you’re stuck working alongside your workplace nemesis, you may have to grit your teeth and try to win her over. Though this tactic involves emotional fortitude, there’s a reason for the saying “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” It’s human nature to reciprocate kindness, and even if your antagonistic coworker doesn’t warm up, you may at least be able to diffuse some of her competitive instincts.

Third, play defense. Share less — or, even better, share selectively. Tell her only the things that benefit you. Again, this takes some mental and emotional energy, but if you can’t trust someone, you have to control whatever this person knows about you, your ideas, and your office relationships in order to limit the potential damage she can cause.

Whatever you do, don’t gossip. Everyone needs support when they’re in a tough situation, but it’s a bad idea to drag coworkers and management into your issues. You never know where loyalties lie and who may be talking behind your back. Moreover, complaining and office gossip can reflect poorly upon your character and leadership skills. Hold your head up high by knowing you are confident enough to be discreet, and find your emotional outlet through friends or family, outside work.

Finally, you may have no choice but to confront her. This approach is not without risk, but sometimes, it’s unavoidable. If you’re at your wit’s end and things have become so corrosive that there is no other alternative but to walk away (to another department, manager, or even company), you may have nothing to lose in trying the direct approach.

Unfortunately, there's nothing easy about dealing with a difficult coworker who makes you feel like you're being sabotaged. Fortunately, we also know that plenty of women have nothing to do with that kind of nonsense. Each of us can control our own behavior and take ownership of our choices and allegiances. Even if we’re not managers, we can all do small things to support fellow women at work — and in the world in general. So the next time you’re in a situation where you see another woman talked over, not given her due credit, or critiqued unfairly, don’t just sit out on the sidelines. Your voice matters, so don’t underestimate your own power to make the office a better place.