We become ourselves more when we get older, we know who we are and we like who we are. I remember when there was a whole rush of books about menopause... My book Fear of Fifty didn’t even mention menopause, you may have noticed. Because it’s not a disease. Childbirth is not a disease and menopause is not a disease! In fact, when women stop trying to please men, they totally come into their own. I think pleasing men is hormonal.We come to a point in our lives where we’re not worrying about getting those eggs fertilised – and that is total, absolute liberation. I see members of my daughter’s generation – she’s 37 – freezing their eggs, and saying, 'If I want to have a baby I’m going to have a baby,' which I think is great. It’s very hard to raise a child alone, but these women have a strong desire to have a child and they’re doing it. More power to them. The important thing about getting older is that we are more unapologetic about who we are.The original title of the book was Happily Married Woman. At a certain point in the process of writing, I put a subtitle: 'Happily Married Woman OR Fear of Dying'. Because Happily Married Woman was ironic, and I began to see as the plot unfolded, that Vanessa was really responding to a sense of mortality. So I made that the subtitle. When people started reading the manuscript, like a cousin of mine, they would say, ‘Erica! Fear of Dying has to be the title’. I said ‘It’s vulgar and obvious’. And my cousin said, ‘Readers are vulgar and obvious!’