The months that followed were a bit of a haze. You know when you spend the whole day at the beach, and then when you get home, you feel like you can still hear the ocean in your ears? That's what it was like. On the outside, I was completely impervious: "This happened, but it doesn't really change anything!" was my go-to line. In reality, it was a little more complicated. I wanted to be angry, if not only because my parents kept yet another secret — an even bigger one than my father coming out as gay 10 years ago — from me, but I mostly felt scared. Scared of who I would be without my Cuban badge; scared that it would never feel like enough now.