Nine years after Heath Ledger's death, Michelle Williams is opening up about what it's like to live without her former partner. In the February issue of WSJ Magazine , Williams revealed the heartbreaking reason she didn't want to leave the home she and Ledger had shared in Brooklyn. "At that time, I was inconsolable," Williams told the magazine . "Because I felt, 'How will he be able to find us?... This is where we lived, and he won't know where we are." Talking about those feelings now still makes Williams sad, but for a different reason. "Now I can't believe I thought that," Williams told the WSJ. "Maybe that's what's making me cry is I feel sad for the person who thought he won't be able to locate [us]." The couple's daughter, Matilda, is now 11 years old. Williams also told the magazine that right now, she's more focused on being a good parent than on finding love. "When you've been a parent for 11 years and you've done it alone, you don't have romantic ideals, because you have a practical understanding that you can do it by yourself," Williams told the WSJ. "The romantic idea of meeting your person and having a storybook family life that looks like the model you grew up with — that doesn't really exist for me."