It's unearthing the prejudice of relatives that can cause the biggest rifts, not necessarily the election results themselves. "My girlfriend's mum voted 'leave,'" Susie added. "But then she also made a sweeping statement about Muslims, and that caused an argument. My girlfriend ended up walking out. Her mum [immigrated] to the U.K. herself so a lot of her arguments didn't make sense."Those on the "winning" side can help smooth things over."We talked about it at a dinner with my mum and dad when I was back in England. My dad never actually said, 'I voted out,' but I know he did," Emma, a 30-year-old editor who lives in Spain, said. "It was a bit awkward because I live in Spain and, clearly, leaving the E.U. could affect my life in a way it may not affect his. But he let me talk because I was upset about the result. He's not always that good at listening to opposite views, so the fact he was fairly quiet and restrained about it was unusual and it helped defuse the uncomfortable atmosphere."For me, not mentioning the referendum wasn't an option. It was too important to pretend it hadn’t happened, partly because I live in the E.U. and my future is looking very uncertain. But mainly because I felt like the country I was from had died. I knew, as soon as the result came out, that there would be an upswing in racist, xenophobic attacks, and there has been . I barely recognize England now. Any conversation about the referendum, or the aftermath, makes me furious. But I've managed to let go of the anger I had toward the relatives that voted out of Europe by reminding myself that their votes alone didn't tip the balance.I'm still angry, but I know exactly who to direct it at: the politicians who lied and spread hate to further their own careers. Fortunately, I don't have to sit down and eat with any of them.*Subjects' last names have been withheld to protect their anonymity.