But why even wait until you've had three or four dates? Why not friend someone after the first date if you had a good time and want to see them again? Well, you risk looking needy, Juarez says. Especially if the person has their Instagram or other social media set to private. "They obviously like to keep a tighter circle, in which case prematurely requesting access might seem too aggressive," she says. Overall, she thinks that Instagram and Snapchat are more casual (as long as your date's account is public), so it's totally fine to follow someone on one of those sites after four to six dates . But, Facebook is a different story. "There may be more of a personal photo history and more family connections on Facebook," Juarez says. She suggests waiting about a month, or until you've defined the relationship , before friending someone on Facebook.