"Just lying about who I was like, 'Oh yeah, yeah, totally, totally.' Getting in on shit-talking someone, you know what I mean? Like 'Yeah, I'm into that,' and I was holding back my deep self, which loved playing with dolls in my room until I was too old. All I wanted to do was be reading a book in a silo with the Amish. I was hiding all these parts of myself because I was trying to be something I wasn’t. I'm like fuckin' 45 and I still feel like I'm trying to make friends with that girl and being like, 'You did not need to be that hard on yourself.'