Living in London can feel like one big fat real-life Instagram: appearance is everything. Yeah, I once went to the opening of a new sushi restaurant and shared nigiri with the entire cast of Eastenders. Yeah, I commute past Big Ben. But, yeah, I also can't see my friends as much as I'd like because it's a one-hour commute to Walthamstow or Stratford. Like Jack, there’s just something I don’t want to do – admit that I can’t hack it in London. What if I miss a gig I like? What if I don’t catch that new photography exhibition?When we live through a filter, trying to convince ourselves that London really is awesome, we can lose sight of the little things. When was the last time you said hello to a stranger? When did you and your mum last spend an afternoon just hanging out? There’s a truth to the old adage that nobody in London smiles and I reckon it has a lot to do with the fact that we are constantly chasing something – but nobody can quite put their finger on what. There is little time to stand and stare, and breathe in great lungfuls of the city air. (Inadvisable, given that 9500 deaths each year are caused by high pollution.)Most of my London friends cite “culture and work” as key reasons why they stay, and there’s no denying London is one of the most exciting cities in the world for music, art and theatre. Many say they’d leave if it wasn’t for work. Laura, a civil servant, said: “I simply can’t do my job outside London. I wouldn’t have moved here if it wasn’t for that.” Another, Jude, said: “People stay because this is where the work is, at least in the entertainment industry.” One friend who has moved to Leeds says she massively misses London. “I just love the variety of things that are on – if something only happens in one place in the UK, it's London.”Yet some industries are trying to decentralise and prove it’s not all about London. Salford is home to the relocated BBC studios, while JPMorgan Chase, Goldman Sachs and Citigroup have all publicly discussed shifting work to other European cities post-Brexit . Additionally, the number of people requesting remote working opportunities is on the rise . Anna, a freelance PR, is worried about losing her contacts and life if she moves. “I think I could do my job very easily outside of London, or even outside of the country, as it’s 95% over email. However, I do think I’d miss out on new business leads and a general trend awareness if I moved out of town. Saying that, I’d save so much, I’d be able to stay in hotels or Airbnbs in town twice a month or so.”Phoebe* thinks staying in London is putting her mental health at risk. “I’m embarrassed to admit it but I spend a lot of time keeping up with the Joneses. If I see friends heading out on a Tuesday night I wonder if I’m making the most of living here! Then I think maybe my friends in Lincoln are actually not partying in Lincoln on Tuesday night or going to galleries or secret dining clubs. I reckon London can make you lose perspective on things that matter.”Perhaps rather than finding fault with the city we once chose to call home, we need to try to become happier with ourselves, or instead trust that we can live fruitful lives outside of the capital. Then, maybe, London will feel more possible.