For starters, never go in cold, no matter how casual the meeting seems. Prepare in advance, even rehearsing in advance (both what you plan to say and how you intend to say it). My friend Lauren Anderson, who’s a former FBI executive, told me that when she was with the Bureau, she would always try to “game” a meeting first. “I’d get a sense of the key person’s agenda and the agendas of my colleagues in the room and speak to them without seeming obvious.” She points out that it’s good to show others, subtly or not, that you’re interested in their perspectives, needs, wants, and not only your own.