Note to future predators: Never make Charles Manson’s daughter fall in love with you or even wonder about you, and definitely don’t tell her sorority sisters about said. Fun fact: The last guy who Chanel No. 3 dated became so obsessed with her ears he had to leave school, and that’s why she wears earmuffs. Okay. This whole time I’ve been thinking the ‘muffs were a nod to the actress’ real-life mom, Carrie Fisher/Princess Leia. But what if she’s also communicating with someone through those things? Like a killer? Or better yet, aliens.

“I knew it was you,” Sam coolly confirmed once the Red Devil removed his/her mask. “You don’t have to do this. I can help you.” My best guess for this particular Red Devil is Boone, the ostracized gay frat bro who faked his own death in episode 1.

(This is even grosser than the size of Jodie Foster’s panic room, but I have to wonder whose fresh blood was already lining the bottom of the tub in the KKT cellar of secrets. Does the Bathtub Baby scene somehow materialize in the flesh every night or is it just for slumber parties?)

Back to the lady action. Terrible horrible Hester/Chanel No. 6/Lea Michele “finds” Sam dead in the tub, then suggests Chad Radwell stay by her to make sure she’s not the killer. “Screw that, Evil Harrington,” Original Chanel fired back because these girls are at least 65 years old. Agh, it’s too awful. Someone else has to die.

3. Rodger, he of Roger and Dodger non-fame The other twin in Chanel No. 5’s “Eiffel Tower” situation has joined his brother in the afterlife. It’s okay; they belong together. Poor guy got nail-gunned to the floor as Abigail Breslin stood and stared, an evil old lady clutching her giant pearls and thanking God she won’t have to withstand another minute of blather about the twins’ secret clicking language. [CUE AGONIZING SERIES OF CLICKS] and whew! He’s dead. It was not close.

Now what? How about a trap door? Sure! The Kappa house has an extensive series of underground tunnels no one but Chanel knew about, obviously, so new co-presidents Chanel and Zayday cheerfully descend into the hall of former presidents and future murders to figure a way out of this funhouse. Uh oh. Here comes another Red Devil, wielding double axes and a blatant disregard for the beautiful tiles.