Oh great, I thought. Add that to the ever-growing checklist of “things I didn’t know I needed to give a shit about that I now need to give a shit about.” I had been engaged for about a month. I was still wrapping my head around the idea that I was getting married. But I was quickly discovering that everyone thought that by placing an engagement ring on my finger, my fiancé had activated some dormant gene that would turn me into a wedding planning expert, the kind of person who could tell you what chateaubriand was, or the difference between tulle and taffeta. I get stressed inviting a bunch of people to a bar for birthday drinks. A wedding planning expert I was not. I struggled with literally every decision: my dress, the bridesmaids’ dresses (ended up bunting that quagmire to them), the guest list (still gives me stress acne to think about), the menu, the invitations, the table decor, the honeymoon, the bachelorette party, the ceremony music. The list of relatively unimportant decisions was seemingly endless. But each of these decisions felt really important, and I was totally overwhelmed. I wasn’t born a Bridezilla, but I was becoming one. And instead of being bitten by a radioactive spider, I had been bitten by the Pinterest Bug, with equally devastating results. I started to believe that if my wedding didn’t have the perfect number of whimsical sayings written on chalkboards, then I might as well throw myself off the cliff where we were taking engagement photos. I probably don’t have to tell you that no one expected a thing from my fiancé, who happens to be male, because of previously stated maleness. Luckily, I didn’t marry a Neanderthal, so he helped me with a lot of the planning. But the fact remains that preparing for the biggest day of our lives is so much more work for the bride. Why is this still the case in 2017? I don’t know, but probably sexism? And the fact that weddings are by definition suuuuper traditional. Like, we still wear virginal white wedding dresses. Who do we think we’re kidding? Sure, I know I didn’t have to have a wedding (or wear a white dress). But the truth is, I’ve always been very into the idea of marriage. I can make this hot, funny Italian guy sign a contract stating he has to love me forever? Hell yes, sign me up! Also, I love weddings! I wanted to have one. But I had never given much thought to what exactly that would entail until it was happening. And I was terrified of letting everyone — and myself — down by planning a subpar wedding.