“Ultimately, we chose surrogacy because I had the drive to have a biological connection,” Kirk says. “You know, I felt shame about that for a long time. I wanted that and it felt difficult to say that out loud. But I realized: It’s okay for me to want that. Part of me felt like, well, there are so many people on the planet already and overpopulation and climate change. There were all these intersecting values that I hold. It felt difficult to come to terms with: Oh, and here I am wanting this heteronormative thing — to have a biological connection to my child.”