While it's hard to admit that sticker shock has played such a significant role in my decision-making, it's even harder admitting that I am also scared to do it on my own because it is hard. Really hard. No one has ever said raising kids is easy — especially no one who’s done it alone. I recently sold my apartment, and opened up some savings I could tap to move forward with single parenthood. But I haven’t. And now I won’t. The urgency has faded with age and has been replaced by a willingness to see motherhood differently and get that connection in other ways, such as the potential to be a step-parent.