I love rom-coms and I used to think I loved a grand romantic gesture. The scenes that deliberately play for swoons get me every damn time. Think John Cusack with a boombox over his head in Say Anything or Heath Ledger singing karaoke on the bleachers in 10 Things I Hate About You. Cue swoon. Cue me in a puddle of tears. The big, public act of adoration is a rom-com centerpiece, but should it be? Have these over-the-top declarations set up an unrealistic expectation of how romance works? Should I save my swoons? It may not be fair to blame rom-coms for Offset’s boneheaded and selfish move to interrupt Cardi’s headlining set (she was the first woman to headline the festival) but there is something to be said about how frequently this trope was trotted out in beloved rom-coms of the past and how newer films are updating the cliché or doing away with it altogether.