These retreats seem extreme, and there’s going to be a natural temptation for people who haven’t heard of them before to think: Those People. Those people with their weird thing. But before you judge, Klein points out that the themes of shame in sexuality and gender roles aren’t just found in these retreats — there a part of our world. “Look in the mirror,” she says. “You might find there are some similar themes in your life. How can we work as a collective to challenge the deeply damaging sexual ethics as opposed to pointing fingers at certain groups of people who we feel are the only ones who are having a negative experience with sexuality. The reality is: Sexuality is complex and we’re all having complex experiences with it.”