Along those same lines, avoid asking your Black coworkers or friends to educate you on how to help Black communities, says DeGeare. She suggests considering, "What are you actually expecting back from this person? If you’re expecting them to do more work with you around that, you need to probably not do that. Don’t send it, don’t ask questions,” DeGeare says. “It’s that laziness in this that’s creating this really toxic environment around these casual check-ins on your Black friends.” You may want to keep your message brief and to the point. "Sending a novel... if I was really going to respond to that and help educate you in this moment, you’re asking for an hour or two hours of my time,” DeGeare adds.