The challenge for researchers, then, is to create questionnaires that accurately and consistently reflect the nuanced experience of sexual desire for as many people as possible, as it changes from day to day. And that's exactly what Dr. Mark has been working on : building a way to investigate the question, What do we really want out of our sexual experiences?What she and other researchers have found so far — contrary to popular opinion — is that women don't have a lower baseline level of sexual desire than men. But when we zoom out to look at it overall, Dr. Mark says there are some slight differences (women's desires tend to be a bit more context-dependent, for instance). For example, one of her papers, published in 2014 in The Journal of Sexual Medicine surveyed 406 people and found that, while the levels of sexual desire didn't differ between genders, what they desired did: All participants agreed that pleasing their partners was important, but women also desired emotional intimacy and "feeling sexually desirable" where men placed more value on physical sexual release and orgasm.For non-heterosexual women, the picture is much murkier, unfortunately. For decades now, research looking at LGBTQ populations has focused only on the risks for STIs associated with sex, explains Dr. Mark. "That has not allowed a lot of room to look at sexual desire and pleasure." But she and other researchers have done some work looking at sexual desire in lesbian and bisexual women, shedding light on the complexities of sexual fluidity and the differences between sexual desire and romantic bonding . For instance, a 2014 study in Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity found that women who identify as bisexual tend to be less supportive of traditional views of monogamy than heterosexual women. However, there's still plenty of research to be done in this area.Your gender doesn't necessarily determine your level of sexual desire, but being in sync with your partner's drive is still an important factor in a relationship . Luckily, if you're not matched up in that particular department, Dr. Mark says that is something you can work on. However, "partners should always try to meet in the middle rather than placing all of the pressure [to change] on one member of the couple, which typically falls on the individual with lower desire," she explains.