Once the pregnancy is successful (IVF using donor eggs has about a 25% success rate overall, according to the CDC ) and you've actually given birth, the next major hurdle will be when and how to tell that child about the donor egg. "Some people go in [to the process] thinking, I’m not going to tell this kid," Deborah says, "and that can lead to negative consequences down the road." In the age of 23andMe, it's surprisingly challenging to keep this sort of thing a secret. Jake explains that biting the bullet and having these difficult conversations tends to be the right move — and it's even better if you do so as early as possible.