Despite this hardship it’s a tradition that has not only prevailed but continued to thrive (see your Instagram all summer for further details). So why do we still do it? Ada asked many rabbis and priests this very question during her research. And the answer? Many couples didn’t actually know. “This one priest told me that the first thing he’d do is look at a couple and ask them if they knew why they were there,” she remembers. “He thinks that it’s something people should be asking more. It’s a real source of strength to be asking that – and to be really conscious of it.” But most of the clergy Calhoun spoke to found engaged couples to be entirely unable to explain their reasons for getting married. One went as far as calling it a “cultural crisis”.