We had to work hard to recognize that there were faults on both sides. There always are. Then we had to work on forgiveness. On patience. On being mindful, especially in front of our two children. On not sweating the small stuff, like The Mystery of the Disappearing Socks. Over time, we managed to talk about the differences between us without it descending into chaos. Seeing ourselves through the other parent’s eyes — in a way that I don’t think parents who live together always do, because the view is different when you’re under one roof — has given us both a certain level of self-awareness that’s been a surprisingly rewarding (and positive) repercussion of our divorce.