I was set on living my life in a way that would serve my own happiness, but I also wanted to make sure I didn’t hurt anyone in the process. And even though I was finally focusing on my own needs, Dylan was struggling with the whole open relationship thing. Soon after moving into my apartment, he told me he couldn’t do it anymore. It hurt him to think of me with other people, he said, because he was afraid he’d lose me to some guy with bigger muscles or more money than him. My love for Dylan has always been tender — he’s like family to me — and I would never intentionally hurt him. Out of respect for his feelings, I agreed to be monogamous temporarily, but I asked him to think through why he was so scared to lose me when we were so solid. I wanted us to reopen the conversation once he’d had a chance to work through his issues.