Since Pietrzak had explained the reality of the treatment, I knew I wasn't going to walk out of the office with a Victoria's Secret-model six-pack. It takes your body weeks to process the dead fat cells. Pietrzak says that over the course of the next three months, my body's macrophages (a.k.a. the "garbage collectors" of my body) see those dead cells, take a "bite" out of them, and convert the fat into triglycerides, which are then metabolized by the liver and ferried out of the body. Yes, you pee them out. Or, at least that's what scientists think. It's possible you poop them out. Everyone's still a bit unclear about that part.

But, don't worry — Pietrzak assured me I wouldn't suddenly become a pooping machine, evacuating my bowels uncontrollably for three months. (I know you were all interested in knowing the specifics of my digestive process post-treatment, so there you go.) She says the amount of dead fat cells getting processed on a daily basis is the equivalent of the fat content in four french fries — so, not a lot.

Because of this cumulative loss, it was hard for me to recognize that my body was, in fact, changing. It wasn't until just before my second appointment, where I measured my waistline, that I realized I had lost about an inch from my hips and stomach. I still had belly fat, but it was a bit less prominent than it had been.

My second treatment was relatively similar, although the suction process was a bit more uncomfortable; there was less pinch-able fat for the machine to grab onto, hence it pulled my skin a bit tighter than my first treatment. After the treatment was over, I only had a day of numbness, plus tenderness that went away in a few hours.

It's now been three months since my second treatment, and I've clocked another two inches off my waistline. Was it a dramatic, transformative, three-dress-size-dropping treatment? No — I'm still the same dress size. But, my clothes fit me better, and I no longer have a problem with waistbands digging into my sides. My body shape is the same, just with fewer bulges than I started out with.