Was It Worth The $$?

What was the worst part of being a bridesmaid? "The bride constantly repeated that she didn’t want any of us to stress, just to have fun. And somehow it made things 10 times more stressful. She was very non-confrontational about things that involved money. I wish she would have just recognized that we agreed to be bridesmaids and that we understood we had to spend money. The other difficult thing is that it can be really hard to say 'no' to things. People on the outside looking in love to give the advice. 'Just say no!' but it’s just not that easy. You have to find the smart ways to say no here and there when you can. And finally, the cost sneaks up on you — $50 here, $100 there — and eventually you find yourself spending over $1K. As a bridesmaid, you start to fear unexpected phone alerts, because it might be someone requesting money for something on Venmo."

What was the best part? "Being part of her big day! It sounds so incredibly cliché, but it’s true. I couldn’t imagine not being part of it, and as expensive as it was, it was a beautiful celebration of their deep love for one another."

Would you/did you include the bride in your own wedding? "I plan to one day, yes. It felt very special being part of the bride’s crew, but honestly, there wasn’t much special about being one of 10. A lot of our friends who weren’t in the wedding got basically the same experience as I did, without having to pay for things like bride tanks."

Would you do it again? "Yes. This was my first experience being a bridesmaid, and I would do it again for this friend in a heartbeat. But it was a good lesson in the importance of being selective. The next time I’m asked to be a bridesmaid, I’m going to roughly estimate how much the entire thing will cost, and go from there."