Which option you choose depends on how openly you and your partner talk about masturbation (as well as how horny you really are). You obviously need to be respectful of your partner's feelings. So if telling them you're going to take care of yourself before the movie starts feels too pushy (or is too embarrassing to say aloud), then mindful breathing might be the best choice. Your arousal might seem insurmountable, but it is possible to work through it without an orgasm. "The idea of blue-balls is an old myth , so the horny partner can certainly calm their arousal down through any number of activities," Cooper says. Mostly, the "activities" that are going to help you work through arousal without masturbating are anything that distracts you from your sexual fantasy . You can do the breathing, which can help you focus on non-erogenous zones like your shoulders, lower back, or feet, Cooper says. Simply take a deep breath in, and think about any body part that doesn't feel sexy to you (because to some people, feet are very sexy ).