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Illustrated by Paola Delucca.

"These are generally good rules to live by if you're in a relationship, but especially important if you're dating someone with an anxiety disorder:

"Don’t tell me to relax. This will never help me to relax. This insinuates that my emotions are inappropriate and/or wrong in some way.

"Don’t minimize my experience. Even with good intention, saying things like, 'You just need to get some more confidence,' or 'I dealt with this one time. I just sucked it up and it got better,' [is] very hurtful. If someone has been diagnosed with a mental illness, they have already seen a medical professional, and are likely taking the appropriate actions to deal with their problem as much as they are able. By recommending solutions in this way, you imply that I am not trying hard enough, that you are somehow more experienced than the medical professional I am already seeing, and/or that you do not believe what I am experiencing is as difficult as I know it to be.

"Ask questions. Don’t assume you know or understand. Everyone is different, experiences emotions differently, and even experiences the same mental illnesses differently. Just because something worked for you or someone you know once, doesn’t mean it is a solution for everyone. Just because you experienced a situation you think is similar doesn’t mean it is similar.

"Don’t tell me to 'be rational,' [or] that I am 'being irrational,' or 'acting crazy.' This implies that my feelings are 'wrong' and is a way of minimizing my feelings. This is gaslighting. I may have a mental illness, but calling me 'crazy' is never helpful."