Going to the gynecologist can be a journey. It often involves cold tongs and personal questions. But it’s a necessary part of life for your health. There’s one question some doctors ask that can cause some speculum -like personal discomfort. “How many sexual partners have you had in the past?” This question can seem invasive or confusing. After all, Shadeen Francis, MFT, a marriage and family therapist who specializes in sex therapy previously told Refinery29 that the “sex number” has historically been “used as a way to shame people for having 'too few' or 'too many' sexual experiences. ” Plus, as America becomes more sex positive, you may have stopped keeping track of your number — which can make for an awkward pause when you just want to get off the table and out of an ugly robe.