My mother constantly told me “no” when I was growing up, especially when I would ask to go places or do things she didn’t think I needed to go or do. When my request turned into begging, she would calmly and firmly say, “no means no.” And that was that. My response (sulking and writing my true feelings in my diary) had nothing to do with her being a woman — I was 13 and wanted to live my 13-year-old self’s best life, whatever that was.