Now, unless you are, say, the Duchess of Argyll or a royal footman, you have probably never come across Dubonnet, an aromatized wine-based aperitif, which is likely because it is not very nice. It is largely thought that the only reason the drink is still in production is because the Queen likes it (though it doesn’t have a royal warrant; presumably because it is French) and, sure enough, you can’t even get it at a normal British grocery store. After ordering the fortified wine off the internet, I mix it with my gin, add the lemon and drink it with “lots of ice”. It is fragrant, it is strong, it is what I imagine drinking Estée Lauder is like. At this point I start to feel the unmistakable pleasure of mild drunkenness. I wouldn’t, say, go and climb up some scaffolding, but I am on my way.