If you think about it, there’s another catchall word that captures all these critiques: greed. Because if greed is defined as “a selfish and excessive desire for more of something (such as money) than is needed” (as Merriam-Webster puts it), and the things that women want are not considered necessary by the mostly-men in power, you can see how all the criticism might saddle women with the label “greedy.” In actuality, this term — and others like it — are designed to keep women down; conditioning from day one for women has been to give, not take, even if it’s for your own self-preservation.