So, maybe I do have a slight fear of falling in love based on past experiences. But it’s not as if I have a plethora of Casanovas knocking down my door either. In the years since my first love, I’ve dipped my toe in the dating pool, sure. But I’ve genuinely not met anyone I’ve connected with enough to imagine a full-blown relationship with. I’ve not been on more than five dates with someone before it just fizzled out. Sometimes I seriously do question whether I’m asexual, for example, but then I see photos of Jamie Dornan without his top on and my lady parts go beep.

Maybe I'm just picky. A lot of my first dates feel like I’m sat opposite the dumb, the dire and the depressingly dull. My friends say I shouldn’t write first dates off so quickly. But that’s hard to do when you find yourself sharing a drink with a lad who refers to his friendship group as "The Dick Dons" (true story).

I’ve also seen my close friends go through enough relationship bullshit to last me a lifetime. It always comes in waves. One minute, all my coupled up friends are sunshine and rainbows and the next thing, I’ve got a mate dumped by text, another who has been ghosted by her boyfriend of ten years and one poor soul whose bloke says he sees marriage and kids in his future – but with the girl he met a few weeks ago in Infernos.

It’s enough to make you see relationships like eating hot wings from that that fried chicken shop that also doubles up as a men’s hairdressers and fixes your phone screen for £20... Not worth all the shit that follows.