Presenting A Bra That Will Only Unhook For Your True Love
The high tech garment can only be undone by someone who literally gets your blood pumping
The brainchild of Japanese lingerie company Ravijour (perhaps they think the French have dibs on the brassiere market?), the "True Love Tester" bra will only "come off" when the woman wearing it is with her true love.
We are not making this up.
Covertly embedded in the bedazzled cups of this high-tech undergarment is a sensor that syncs via Bluetooth to an app that calculates heart rate. When the app detects that the wearer's rate is sufficiently high, then -- and only then -- will the clasp open. "This innovative bra cannot be unhooked without true love," a breathy-voiceover proclaims in a promotional spot as we're treated to a visual of the bra popping open.
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How high does one's heart rate need to get before one's girls can be sprung from one's cutting edge garment? According to the video (below) it's somewhere between the rate reached while shopping and that of jogging.
"When excited, the adrenal medulla secretes catecholamine which affects the automatic nerve and stimulates the heart rate," explains an un-named "Doctor/Former Med School Associate Professor." Hey, with credentials like that he must know of what he speaks.
How the wearer is supposed to remove the bra herself after a humdrum, basal heart rate day isn't addressed in the promo, although, that could be the perfect time to break out those dusty old Tai Bo tapes.
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While the efficacy of such a product might be called into question, so too could the fact that the company is also marketing it as an anti-sexual harassment device, implying in the (oft-verging on creepy) video that the bra will keep your breasts safe from the unwanted gropings of letches everywhere.
[Writer Qualification: I did watch this video several times to make sure it wasn't an SNL spoof. Though, if Seth Meyer catches wind of this ...]