In 2011, I had my first child. Shortly thereafter, I created BOX Naturals because I quickly realized that after a woman births a child, the kid is not the only being in need of all natural wipes. Copious amounts of wipes. The only thing I could think about was – “WHY did no one tell me this?”
I’ll tell you why. Women forget in order to propagate the human race. If we didn’t forget all of the annoying things leading up to and after childbirth, well, friends, humanity would come to a screeching halt.
Well, I didn’t forget. Consider me the friend that straight up tells you that yes, you did gain weight, or that your outfit looks like it’s from the ‘80’s and not in a good way.
Five Things You Need To Know About Becoming a Parent:
1. The time you’ll most need a vacation is right after you give birth. Unfortunately, that is when you can basically kiss your current idea of “vacation” goodbye.
2. Sometimes, you will want to stuff your kid back where it came from. Everyone feels this way, so lose the mom guilt.
3. It can take a long time to feel a bond with your baby. Everyone talks about the instant bond that they felt with their babies. Well, guess what, it doesn’t always happen right away. Just because it came out of you, doesn’t mean that the crying, red-faced Mr. Magoo they hand you is something you intrinsically understand. A bond can take weeks or months to form, and…it’s OK!
4. You will hoard mesh undies like that time we all thought Twinkies were going out of business. Chances are, you are currently wearing a cute Hanky Panky thong. Or a little boy short. Perhaps a practical cotton bikini cut brief. Chances are, you are NOT wearing baggy mesh underwear (no judgment if you are. Well, maybe a little judgment). These little gems will be given to you after you’ve had your baby by the hospital. STEAL AS MANY AS YOU CAN. If you had a c-section, these undies will lay forgivingly over your incision. If you birthed naturally, these undies will hang loose below your tender lady parts. They are magic and you will want to make sweet love to them. Because you sure won’t want to make love to anything else for a long time.
5. You will never sleep like a normal person again. Even when your kid does eventually sleep through the night, sleeping with the monitor pressed up against your ear will have trained your ear to hear as keenly as a blind bat. Every single creak, every little mouse sigh, and you will pop up like a prairie dog who smells danger. Or, you will fling your arm across your baby daddy’s face and say, “Your turn.”
Since I probably slapped you hard with the truth, I will end with another truth: It is all worth it. It may not feel like it at first. It may not feel like it all the time, but there will be those moments (usually when the kids are sleeping) when you think “Maybe we should try for another…” Becoming a parent has made me a better person because it forced me to be the person my children think I am: the smartest, kindest, bravest, funniest person in their world.