ith that, and then – here’s what always seems at first a bit whacky – we start short sets of what we call bilateral stimulation.
That can involve either holding a buzzer in each hand, or listening to alternate left-right clicks in a set of headphones, or eye movements as the client tracks the therapist’s hand across their field of vision.
We’re not entirely certain how it works, but bursts of to-and-fro of attention in EMDR seem to replicate what the brain naturally does with Rapid Eye Movements when we’re dreaming, firing up both halves of the brain to rework old traumas and store them safely in the past where they belong.
This happened with my client. After a lot of tears and compassion for that little girl, the wound was cleaned and can now heal.
EMDR therapy is not a miracle cure for every emotional ill. But I and my colleagues find it an effective tool for a wide range of symptoms, from depression and anxiety to the more behaviourally visible forms of mental unrest such as OCD, bulimia and anorexia, ADHD and more.
EMDR therapy is endorsed by the National Institute for Clinical Excellence (NICE) as a mainstream treatment for PTSD, along with Trauma-focused CBT – the approach you’re more likely to encounter in the NHS if you go to your doctor with what you think might be PTSD.
NICE does not recommend ordinary counselling for trauma, and it’s been my experience as a therapist that just talking about the past doesn’t always make a difference to a client’s life in the present.
So, how did Mary’s story end? She went out to buy herself the flowery piggy bank that she’d always wanted as a little girl.
More importantly, she no longer wants to divorce her airgun-wielding husband, but is curious instead to find out, lovingly, what childhood trauma he might be acting out.
Find your balance
If you’d like to explore what from the past might be getting in the way of your present, try this exercise. Focus on a situation that bothers you and freeze-frame that moment as if it were a photograph. Once you see the picture clearly in your mind’s eye, ask yourself the following questions. Just observe whatever comes up for you, don’t judge it.
1. What does the image make me feel, emotionally? Choose just one word.
2. Where is that feeling residing in my body? It could be anywhere, from the heart to the gut to your little toe. Just trust what comes up.
3. What’s the negative thought I have about myself that’s attached to this? It could be anything: I’m not safe, I’m a bad person, I’m incompetent, I can’t handle it.
4. And now, the key bit, drop back in time, as far as you can go, and don’t censor what comes up.
5. Take time, perhaps with a friend, someone you trust, maybe even a therapist, to reflect on how the long-term impact of those old small-t, possibly Big-T, experiences are compromising your life and relationships today.