e time, motivation and resources to focus attention on conflict management as a part of education.
Results and impacts
Here are some results from five projects in Stockholm, Sweden: one pre-school, three municipal schools and one Waldorf school. Altogether, 137 teachers have taken part in these projects and evaluations. The intention was to adapt the projects to each school’s specific conditions, such as limited time (the projects lasted from 6 to 12 months) and limited financial resources, and to make the content as practical as possible for the teachers’ everyday work.
Results revealed in the evaluation (shown as an average across the five projects) included:
- 90% of the participants felt they had increased understanding of factors facilitating communication/co-operation.
- Increased understanding of factors that prevent communication/co-operation (87%).
- Greater feeling of security in dealing with conflicts (80%).
- Increased understanding of communication that facilitates learning (78%).
- Greater feeling of security in difficult/challenging conversations (71%).
- Increased ability to achieve constructive co-operation (67%).
There is consistent feedback that NVC strengthens self-awareness and influences all relationships. Starting from the teacher-student relationship, this will inevitably spread to others – teacher to teacher and student to parent, etc. When students experience this NVC approach from teachers, they get used to handling differences and conflicts with respect and care, which is a skill for life. Students report that they are taken seriously and helped to understand themselves, other people and conflict situations. From this they gain self-knowledge and a sense of security. This is a foundation for successful conflict management.
Sometimes students have grown beyond their families in conflict resolution skills, which is not always easy. Parents can be both inspired and annoyed by that dynamic. Often projects start with teachers, and later on parents seek to know more as they see big changes in their children´s communication and self-esteem.
- NVC is a very helpful tool to learn how to identify emotions, needs and facts, and differentiate them from misinterpretation and judgments, all of them key concepts to transform conflicts in a non-violent way.
- It is a powerful resource to develop empathy and assertiveness.
- This methodology, based on communication skills, seems accessible to anyone – considering everybody uses communication on a daily basis, and is likely motivated to improve it – but at the same time it allows deep connection with other people’s needs, with one’s own humanity and the humanity of others – which is a much deeper outcome that people might not be aware of, or ready for, before starting the course.
- The desire to reach actors beyond teachers and pupils, which might include not only all the school staff but also parents, increases the reach of the results.
Betina Jamsek, teacher in Prevalje, Slovenia
“Due to the NVC idea my work as a teacher as well as my daily life have got incredible new dimensions. I consider the aspects and strategies I have learned so far the greatest gift in my life. We are all humans with individual stories, backgrounds and needs, and it simply feels amazing to have the knowledge to contribute to the well-being of pupils and co-workers. Instead of judging, blaming and self-pitying I have learned how to listen and open my heart to people around me … and all of a sudden it seems so easy to be understood. By support of NVC I feel to finally have the right to be a compassionate teacher with my own needs as well. I have experienced that a safe, respectful and warm classroom atmosphere is the solution to all challenging situations. Thank you, dear NVC friends, thank you!”
Giacomo Poleschi, parent and NVC practitioner, Lido di Camaiore, Italy
“When a conflict arise with my daughter, NVC helps me in connecting with myself and being able to distinguish the needs I'm trying to meet and then choose between many different ways I can take care of them. When a conflict 