uh that ours girls are already in their teenage therefore the taking care of them is uh much easier if they’re toddlers or even uh in the kindergarten it will be uh tougher especially uh parent have to both parents are working uh so that’s something I very thankful for


describe your perfect day okay for me my my perfect day will be, send the girl to school go for nice breakfast uh especially coffee, then I can come back and relax and uh do what I want I need to do uh then after that go and pick the girls I will end with uh


part one financial related topic


the two girls also have uh their own savings account so every every year if they have their #ang pao# money, or they have the year end they have uh school awards you know like, uh scholarship money, or, they will all placed the money into the account but this account they can use it for like


to buy their presents or, or to, use the money to you know to treat the family or use the money to treat uh their, their grandparents, so I think I think is still uh is flexible so their monthly , monthly allowance ah that they save also can save into their savings bank account


yup so I think , uh it helps them to grow in the area of uh be independent uh taking control of their own saving and ownership of uh uh saving their money


uh for myself I also do , err, uh park some money on the, err uh, I I don't pay monthly I pay yearly for my insurance for, uh more for old age you know that uh uh, uh reach certain age that I can uh draw out the money I also buy shares uh but usually I buy uh blue chip shares so every every year they will return me some dividends so this one is for more for long term I don't plan to draw it out you know unless the share price rises uh not only that uh


err, I also embark into some bonds, uh like singapore bonds you know at this at this time uh singapore bonds will be a a good place to park the money though the interest uh may not as good as last time but it's still uh a good place to park the money that I need to


uh need to, need to uh earn


uh regarding credit cards uh we do give uh our older girl credit cards, so uh uh she is very , techno savvy so she just took a photo of our cards and then when she need to buy, uh things uh she will just use the credit card from us


so can be trusted I I tested her that uh whether she is accountable to, uh, in using the cards I can see that uh when during weekends you know, she will, she will use the credit card to buy food yeah so I think uh, uh


is it helped to save money in the sense that you know uh the interest wise uh uh through paying credit cards we can earn points from it so I think is wise for her to use a credit cards as long as she did not misuse it


okay regarding joining account with uh husband uh, personally I don't agree with it, I because I I'm working and my husband is working so I think uh, , uh we can come to a compromise to you know each each each of us take out a certain percentage you know to go for tour or


to go for a payment for the house loan last time I mean I meant last time, so I believe that uh whatever we earn uh, uh, it should be kept by ourselves and then uh wherever there's a in need we should compromise to share the load together


so I think uh, so basically I I don’t agree on joining account


okay mostly regarding the ATM card, alright , actually both my girls they are, capable to handle their own ATM cards it's just that the my second girl will be she will lost cards so that's why I'm still holding on to her card


so uh other than that she's mature enough to handle her savings and her, her expenditure, uh well for my older girl she's she I she has the card , but I do still have her account in my in my in my bank, so uh so in case that she overspent


uh she will she will keep a record you know by nature she's a very uh, prudent girl so she will not uh allow herself to spend certain amount within uh certain month but I think she use the money to touch lives uh like giving treats to the grandparents and giving treats to to us you know so I think


uh he watches her finance uh closely if there is, if it happens that she overspent she will usually control herself for next month she will not, uh, she will she will save more even she will skip her recess you know just to save that amount to to to


to keep the the amount uh, the the ideal amount that she want to uh, uh stay on to so I think , so I think is still on the habits of the child that uh whether they can manage the money or not but, uh other than that uh at the age of uh uh


to me personal I feel that at the age of maybe sec sec three onwards, is is is uh they're they're actually uh mature enough to handle their own accounts


actually in some bank they uh, like, if I'm not wrong I heard from my student that they took loan so there's no interest charge but after they come out after they finish their studies they can just pay one lump sum, so I think is a good uh at uh


it's a good I mean to use money wisely I think this is a good choice to uh turn into so that using the uh this period of time you know to uh to take the uh the help from the from the bank to help these students to study and then with a without giving the


any interest charge for the the loan they have taken so I think it's uh it's very wise to to have to to go into this thing but I also have heard that uh from another banker that he came back came back from overseas that he felt that , uh uh he got to pay back the loan and uh still got to work he felt that uh how you wish that his parents can


uh can uh can afford and pay all the all his study loans but I felt that uh it's a good journey to a person to grown up you know by you know uh make a make make make him tougher and and to count his blessing that you know through


through able to uh take up the education without uh the need to fork out a uh uh any money, and still can study the course that he liked and fulfil his dream it's just that you need to come back and to pay back the loan just earn maybe his saving maybe not even have any saving because the money is use it to pay back for the loan so I think uh there is always a pro and cons so yup so that we may consider


it's a good consideration


part three negative experiences


or I can still remember when uh when I was young, uh, uh because I'm the oldest girl in the family so my mum will, always uh use me and as a as a very uh, as an example to you know speak volume to my two siblings


so always get caning for uh, like breaking a bowl, and even uh I go out with with them uh with my mum then , I always fall down because I'm so scared of uh walking beside her so I always fall down, so I come to a point that


uh I dare not to walk, I dare not to walk so , so uh, to a point that my mother, uh doesn't want uh didn't want me want to bring me out at at all, so , so the only person that uh


really care for me is my grandmother so my grandmother will


will always pity me and will bring me out to walk and not walk, she will always carry me, and she's a very small size, very petite, she will always piggyback me behind her


these are the thing that


that , cause a a lot of pain to me so , so as I I I I I I grown up


that is slowly I pick it up because , uh yup, so other things like uh, so being the eldest at home also need to uh clean up the, , the the mess so I'm I'm just living in


concern uh scrutiny by my by my mum, or maybe because I’m also a a wedlock child you know that’s why


uh, also made me feel that I'm I’m unwanted, that uh I'm I'm the results of her to marry to my dad you know so these are the thing these are the negative thing that that I experienced as a in in my childhood


describe a time when you feel when, nobody care about oh nobody cares about, okay often what is the thing that worries me the most is uh my my oldest girl on scholarship, she has scholarship since uh


uh, P P five onwards when she told me that she has uh the the doctor the doctor told her to see more often so I I I doesn't I I don't know what is uh scoliosis so I I don't know I did not take action about it so I just leave it so by the time when she's sec one she would uh


the nurses uh, from the ministry of health board came and say that uh she needs to see a doctor, so realised that her spine uh S shape spine has uh deteriorate to twenty one degree that's where I'm I'm very shocked and, I kept on actively looking for doctors to


to cure her but unfortunately the curve uh because of her puberty her curve uh increase another ten degree, so become thirty one degree, so , so I think uh in this area that , uh because of scoliosis uh certain part of the muscle is


uh, is very is is very tense and the other part of muscle is very relax so there's imbalance that's why there's a S shape so the thing is that she will be easily lethargic and she cannot focus like any uh those normal child who has a healthy spine and she will easily uh get wearied weary


and and she can't focus, so these are the thing that uh that is my my main main concern and she ever cried to us and and ensure to us that whatever she wants to do she can't uh, push herself and motivate herself to do it or because uh she cannot focus so I think of this body


unhealthy body also plays a part in uh on the attention of a child so showed so she will escape she'll find ways to escape like you know uh playing games you know or, uh find distractions like uh watching dramas and


so , these are things that uh, err, at the same time she also has very high expectation on herself in her studies so I think these are the few things that uh, uh, uh I'm very concerned as a mother, uh uh


that uh she will she also eat uh unhealthy food you know like your, like, Lama what what the kind of very spicy food, , very very spicy food yeah so I think food wise uh she eat unhealthy also so these are the another thing I'm very concerned about and she sleep very late so I think uh all these add up to uh


uh, that she you you know, will will make her to to, to not to put she can't have a sound mind to really uh plan her day and really uh uh revise her work well so I think these are the thing that that that that causes her to


to it will further hopefully , it will stop deteriorating so these are the thing that , uh then for my second girl I'm I'm more worried that uh she's a bit uh eating disorder when she's under stress uh she will look for food to


to to to, to ease her stress and uh she will just eat non-stop just like me I also eat non-stop when I'm under stress, I’ll eat non-stop whatever thing that I bought today I’ll make sure I’ll definitely clear within fifteen minutes


so these are the thing that , uh that worry me me a lot and uh and my second girl also over, uh, obsessed by her she set very high high high expectation high goals and, uh she always wanted to meet and to clear there's one day that


she was so stressed up so overwhelmed because the end of the year exam it carries seventy percent so uh, either she make it or she, she she, she didn't make it she will not get the, the the the, the distinction that she wants so that day I'm so shocked by her that she study from


, night to morning and after that she just go straight to school without without a blink of eyes to sleep, so that is something that I'm so so affected, I'm so affected you know that that, she so obsessed and so , uh so affected you know by her the her her studies that she will just


what what what what is the biggest thing that holding you back from your goal, I think for me is more on my two girls so when, uh when they are, I think when they finish their studies uh


maybe uh go to stay in uni, uh, then I'll be more comfortable to pursue my goal because I still need to be at home uh, uh preparing food for them you know when they, when they ask for food I got to make sure that within you know


five to ten minutes I can produce a dish ah, so I think , so I think this is a responsibility uh for me to, to fulfill you know when they still need you because to me I always tell myself these are the things that is uh that has expiry date, uh uh


it will it will it will not always I’ll cook for them so in time to come they need to cook for their parents uh cook cook for their own children and their family members so these are the thing that affects me that uh I just need to be, I felt as a mum my role is I need to be around with my girls till they’re uh they’re independent uh


I can see that they are they're capable to handle you know their own own ownself then I can let go of myself I can you know uh and fulfil my goal with uh, uh with uh with uh freedom and with uh with no concerns and worries behind


what is the one thing that, what is the one thing that uh, you wish to change and you can't change, maybe uh for me is uh


I will not be so strict to my second girl when she's young, so uh I think I‘ll love her more and I’ll embraced her more so uh so yeah


okay ya, recording recording yes moving, part two positive experiences


uh for me is , uh, my happiest moment is when uh when my my children and and my whole family went overseas, so I I really love mountains and lakes, that’s where uh that’s where uh uh


at the nature will just destress uh me and uh seeing the two girls uh loving each other spending time with each other and talking to each other uh is a very joyful moment, and uh then uh my husband and myself will go overs uh I mean will will will drive the car around and see the mountains and even the snow so I think uh all these are the the nature will help to you know uh


to to destress us to to, to feel uh loads off you know from all the all the, responsibility you got to carry when you are back in singapore so, so going oversea is helped me to be when I go oversea is the time that I really switch off I really


don't care about anything in singapore is everything I can all the things I got to takeover and uh and not only takeover uh must be excellence you know so I think very high expectation on myself to meet the, uh, my own expectation so I think uh going oversea is totally zero


zero role just doing nothing just uh just enjoy everything is being uh prepared and done up by my


for me as a mum that uh, I like to, I like to hear, my daughter the first, the first uh, the first expression when she saw the, when she see the food that I cook for her


like my girl will say !wow! so I love to hear the !wow! you know it means that uh all the hard work I've done ah to prepare this dish ah is really worth it I usually will watch maybe seven to uh five to six uh YouTube you know to learn one dish to make sure that uh I will


uh it will turn out be perfect so I think uh is uh it's amazing to see because I wished to leave a legacy that my children will remember that uh, uh my mom will cook you know uh, extraordinary dish you know just to, to fit her stomach to


helped her to be healthy because as once I heard from my my daughter came back and say mum I've never known that uh uh the uh because she went to this N uh NKF, uh uh uh, to do some volunteer work so what happened is that uh, so uh


she get to know about the the food truck you know the food the this uh diabetes uh, the correct food they supposed to eat you know uh healthy food so what happened is that uh then she told me mum I never know that the food you cook for me are so healthy all unhealthy food is all on the list so I felt very comforted and uh


uh they she knew that uh the food I cook for her is really uh meant good for her, so another one as a teacher so I I will feel very touched you know when my student‘s mum uh, uh uh uh, to show appreciation to me that uh they believe in me to to help their children to do to get to uh a good grades like recently I taught one


I just started teaching a a a new student uh, he math and math, never passed before all the while is uh maybe ten plus percentage, so recently her test after three months I start to coaching him he get uh managed to get he managed to pass


so I think uh but it's not the marks that uh, uh, that draw that that drive me or motivates me but what motivates me is that uh he will he will come to me and said that uh !wah!, I’m I'm so excited to do math now I'm so excited you know I'm looking forward to do math you know can you give me more more more math questions so this is the thing that excited excite excite me because I think that uh a subject it should be whatever subject we learnt it should be out of love and not out of uh


to achieve to besides achieving good results uh it should be to enjoy the subject to love the subject that is the the it should be the engine and to drive a student to do better so I think , uh hope uh, hopefully he's coming he of one month more one month later he'll be having his PSLE hopefully he will do well and


he able to go to secondary school so uh seeing a child from a low esteem child to a hard uh high esteem child in mathematics uh it made me feel uh feel as uh feel good and I felt that , , uh as a teacher uh just like as a doctor you know we bring hope


to to a student when, they have been going through years of hopelessness


what what did you use to hate as a child and but now you love as an adult, , I think uh uh I don't have a very good childhood uh because uh, from young I’m the eldest at home so I get all the caning and beating


out of uh, need to set good examples to the my younger sibling, and even in primary school because of uh, uh uh, all the beatings at home also, you went to school your teacher will you know, you have that kind of <mandarin>欠扁:qian bian</mandarin> face you know your teacher will also slap uh I mean I also get all the abuse from school also so


but all these are are past uh, uh, but it it does affect your esteemed especially when you're when you become uh, a teens and, uh even young adults uh, it really affects so I think , but uh but it's good you know when uh


someone who love me very deep and then uh, he saved me and uh transformed me and then to be a


to be a uh uh, loads my heart with lots of love, that's where I become a, uh a very confident girl, and then uh that's where , uh, I get to know


I I I pick up my confidence then then I met my husband and, now I I I, I really appreciate the life that I have that uh I really enjoy every minute every second uh, uh excellence in every areas and


uh believing that uh I can do all things you know, through, through him who give me the strength so , his, it's a good experience that , especially now that uh, uh even planning about old age that uh I want to be a volunteer in helping the unfortunate in


in uh as a as a as a, as a tutor who give free lessons to help the poor so I think of, everything is lined up and I'm excited, I'm very excited about uh even my future to come, as now I got to provide you know


for the family and , uh, wait until my two girls they've finished their uh, their uni and start working that is where my retirements uh kicks in and I’ll I’ll do, I will do something good back to the the society


oh what do you love most about yourself , I I I love my my confidence uh, my uh positive perspective over my work and uh, uh, when I'm under pressure I can uh perform and I can overcome a situation fast and then uh


lastly is uh, uh I mean I, I will not dwell into uh, the negative situation


eh , financial related topic, okay so do you want to talk about the thoughts on CPF contribution


okay so, I think CPF contribution is a good it's a good , policy ah basically


basically we its forced it's used to force people to save oh and then it distributes equally into three, different uh like a like a pot of gold like that one is your ordinary then the other one is your MediSave and retirement account and then I think it's quite smart that they they convert it to retirement account


ah after a certain age ah, so I think it's good for, normal people who do not really know how to save money and finance properly at least they can retire properly with a bit of money or


because they do not have enough cash ah, true so you actually it also depends on the the income oh so by right they they they force you to save certain amount of from your income ah


ya uh agree


but I guess they also have flexibility uh like like my parents that time when they need a minimum sum they couldn't make it then, they also allow her to take it out and not meet the minimum sum requirement


I think on another note right you said that the for the for the younger generation err it may not be enough right but this is just a very basic kind of savings think that's why they came up with this thing called the supplementary retirement scheme the SRS ah


so that if you want to save more you can actually put in more err cash


they don't work hard lor to earn more money lor ya no choice mah because cannot be everybody, follow the lower income people uh the lower income might need to catch up ah


do you know the the percentage of interest for SRS, do you know for CPF right for your OA and your ya how many percentage for the first sixty K


!oho! the aeroplane is here , , SRS zero point zero five oh


but then the OA leh the OA has a certain like two percent or ah I think five percent for the first , think first sixty K out of first sixty K the twenty K in your OA account is a five percent after that right after that more than twenty K right you will be it will drop to


to like two percent ya, ya then there's another account that is uh together one is OA and what SA, !wah! tap tap already, okay OA and SA


is it I think so it no it, I I forgot right there is actually a , I think the ah the ordinary account and err one more account that you merge together


I think it's, it's SA or SR I cannot remember lah !aiya! that one have to read up again, ya okay, what, I haven't put in SRS leh I haven't put I I actually thinking of putting it but then


I need to pay finish the loans ah so I I wanted to ask you uh last night right is ah which one , I know it's it's always a balance but my question is err should I, should I, put more money in the loan as in to clear the loan or should I put more money in the savings


but they always say you must start saving early ah because of the compounding interest, but they say it's never too late to start to


okay so I ask you ah let's say you have six thousand dollars for saving up extra cash how will you distribute this six thousand would you six five thousand return to the loan, then one thousand, for savings, or five thousand five hundred for the loan and five hundred for savings


then why not err three thousand for loan and, uh three thousand for savings


okay then I will think that the first the first step of the three thousand is to set aside for emergency fund which is six months of your monthly income right, so ya so I think the the first step is I want to create


a emergency fund cause which now I do not have an emergency fund, yes, what what do you think it's okay, so so everybody should always set aside emergency fund first or should


just straight away go for err, a a conservative saving


what what's that say again what's the name, how you spell SEEDLY ah oh


never plan what we didn't plan that time when we buy the first car, okay so so now I ah I also was thinking that uh, that I should also eventually you will need to buy car right because eventually financially we will be


quite stable then we'll have a car, or rather we or rather you we should we will think that ah I think it's time to buy but when is this time to buy a car lah that's, that's my thought lah, first could shouldn't be I think I think we eventually will like maybe ten fifteen years later we'll buy a car because maybe you have enough money in your bank so I then that that that that brings me to uh thinking of


when is the right time to buy the car , so I think that may answer the, the planning for a big ticket item lah like


I did not it is actually a need it's a need more than a want I was working in the the, very far away place mah


okay so I think the first thing is the the deposit right the downpayment right, have to have to have the down payment right to in order to buy the car, I think that time my mum forced me to save, certain uh set aside a certain amount of money every month and eventually I did have the money to


put in down payment ah, no I did not I did not I did not set aside the money because I want to buy the car I just set aside money just for saving


it's just nice that I needed a car and then uh I saw that I have this enough money to set to it I have enough money to put a down payment I just went for it lor


it was actually quite a bad bad financial decision, ya because uh after you take away that savings then uh there's no emergency fund anymore basically you are using your emergency fund , for a car lah, ya which that time we have no financial knowledge at all zero


ya, and my parents also quite bad with the financial, !huh! knowledge ah


it's what I want to ask you ah look at this last question is quite interesting what can you do to earn extra income or to improve your income level I think it's for you leh because I think I really quite maxed up, I've already , reach my maximum capability ah


ah so what about you ah


that's very very generic eh, oh with the with the kids right


okay , !hais! , how do you manage your cash flow , I'm I'm I'm quite lousy with it err, I've been trying I think my only only way to manage the cash flow is to return the loan


then the rest right I the rest like groceries and all the daily expenses are just depend on I trust that you will spend prudently then I'll just I'll just pay accordingly, so I never like set aside like err I'll tell you like eh this month you only can spend three thousand dollars on


on all household items, I did not I did not set that ah I will just take it that you will always find the cheapest and the most amount of quantity, versus balancing out with quality kind of err, things so I'd just


I'd just support your financial expenditure, ya so I don't really have, a dedicated or allocate a certain number of savings expense, for insurance investment kind of thing


I wanted to start small leh meaning ah I will want to save like err I will set aside, cause, the insurance thing also also helped me right because, because err I know there are there are certain plans that and insurance is actually quite a very very conservative or moderate conservative kind of err


thing so I want wanted to set like two hundred dollars or three hundred dollars aside per month, to put inside and that and I want to use it to start as my savings or investment kind of thing ah and at the same time there's also a protection thing ah cause I after joining right then I realized that the


insurance it's really a protection thing and if I have a lot of protection then, and at the same time if it's, a savings or endowment plan all these right then err it's it's good enough lor because I already started with all the hospitalisation and life plan accident plans with I think that's a basic


kind of err armour ah, ya, for yourself I think you only lack the X, not long is the accident ah, no so I must I must set aside I must I must solve my own problem first before I can resolve their problems


ya that day I also was thinking whether to uh everyday teach #kor kor# about money so I wanted but wanted to shift until the new house then we will start lah so basically I will want to like every, everyday, I will give him like three dollars


then he will I would give him a a a a pot of for savings for buying things and for any other thing, okay then I will ask him to set aside his, three one dollar and put into which jar, K then eventually if he want to buy thing then he will take from the expenditure jar


ya then if he got any other thing he don't know what to do at the end of the month I'll ask him okay so you at the at the end of the month you have this, third jar right you can you can redistribute it to savings or expenditure, ya so I think if you make it fun for him lor everyday three dollars so one week is what twenty-one dollar


sorry sir ya twenty one dollar


okay then maybe like ten cent twenty cent


ya no so we can actually start like twenty-cent right then for savings you will tell him that every time every month right for a certain amount I will I will top up if you have you have hit this certain amount of savings then I'll, top it up into your, saving account


fun right but but but we're moving lah then , I have no time to as in I don't want to to, it's quite troublesome ah I think when we shift to the new house you can put a jar three jars or something like that


for the day actually I was I was uh looking at the expenditure uh COVID is the I really heard I really like CB period it is the period of time whereby our


expenditure dropped down by almost fifty percent you know we never we never take transport that transport right already reduced, one one to two thousand dollars you know, because never take bus never take MRT ah never I mean never take taxi


oh you'll be surprised that groceries right actually didn't take take take big big chunk of your money so during that time whereby we we don't earn a lot during the CB period remember, but our expenditure also cut fifty percent you know


, transport is really the biggest ah I would think


okay please click the stop


negative experiences


if I start I will I will talk about helper already and you want to talk about helper first


actually at that time I was also we were risking about uh violating the CB rule ah, cause we had to ask uh , our parents to come over and help, to manage ah, so at that time I quite stressful cause , I need to think of a a a a valid reason to explain to the authorities if we ever get caught


uh then I decide to, go for it and ask them for help ah because really without them ah we cannot , I cannot look after the helper plus plus the children plus work ah, so I waiting to that time if, if, if uh we are being found out or what then at least I will be able to explain nicer I think it's really a


exceptional case is not that we purposely want to , create more trouble for during the CB period, ya lor ya, so you are right lah that time was, felt more I think it's trapped lah, trapped lah you are stuck


like we cannot do we cannot we cannot violate the rule yet , we we cannot survive at that time lor so I decide to violate the rule and so that we can at least tide through anyway is at the end of the CB period lah when the cases also start to drop


ya, so for myself the negative experience ah, , err


that time oh when I was when my, when my flying not very good lor, , I think I remember that time the very hard landing when I come back, not really hard but then very lor, that one really uh heart drop ah


my heart really dropped , I firstly when I when when it happened right at the moment right I was , I was worried that people got injured ah, then can feel lah you can feel


you can feel the the the impact lah, I don't know why I explain I explain to you before I do not know how come I forgot to , to recall your flare lah flare means to to slow down the rate of descent, actually the rate of descent is not so high already just that need to do one more one more


flare, then when you hit the ground right then ah !wah! the first thing that came to mind is people you're injured or not then second thing is is the plane okay or not then the third is, uh are we are we all, safe or not uh something like that lah, then I realised that and then when we print out the data come out it's actually not not that hard


not it's still it's still within still far away from the limit, we are still very safe, so then it started off with the, fearful of uh landing properly ah, then I thought that I'm really very very very very lousy ah


then after I talked to a few people right actually , everyone of us go through this phase, before , so I think there is a point whereby everybody's career at the as the worst, period ah and then this, this bad period will keep coming back every now and then


ya it's like a cycle lah cannot be always be good all the way ah, same as that time when controlling lor also the same also got also got bad times, also got a close proximity kind


, then you can from there start to think about the amount money part lor


but at the beginning we already say what we don't have hobbies


I don't have a interest I for me I don't have interest ah, I don't have interest to do things ya, do you have, like what dancing ah


then you go dancing lor when they your kids grew up lor, got those aunties


line dance


maybe one day you will know lah maybe one day, I think now now it's a bit difficult for you to take cause they still need you lah but when they reach primary school then maybe you can


ya six years you are still young what you are still in your thirties leh


so so your stress is you you do not know what to do in the future


so you are those type of parents that err, will want your kid to be successful ah, like they do well in their academics


[orh] so if they don't do well will you send them for


I'm having a dilemma lah I do not know whether I want them, to, to go for classes, or should I just let them be, uh (hmm), like you just do your best, ya err because


but I think [orh] the part of us like want to always make them a hundred


but sometimes I also look at err <P2>sheryl</P2> right then I was like how come <P2>sheryl</P2> can be so, uh anyhow right let the kids , shout and scream and then she also can't be can't be bothered


but I don't know what what's the what's the bad thing about letting them have uh free play oh, I'm struggling like I do not know whether I should let them have free play that much ya


oh the saddest scene you have ever witnessed oh yes yes I have, when I see this uh question uh my my my my cousin {loh] my cousin that passed away


(hmm) I think that one hor, because I see my #ah yi# very poor thing leh, ya, it's like his her best son passed away like that


so so so because now I have kids right then then this sort of thoughts will come will I will think about it like what if my kids pass away, ya, it's like, okay so so I do not know I haven't I'm in my thought right there's a few few


few thought I have a few thoughts ah for example will I feel that uh they pass away then I'll feel very disappointed cause I spend so much effort to groom them up then it it, goes down to waste would I feel like that or, would I feel like err err err very sad that uh


nobody can uh can can be with me until I pass away or, I don't know leh, I don't know how should I feel ya so I I think that time when I see her like that I think that was the saddest


saddest moment of my life, or a rather a saddest scene I have seen, this, always you always see like in the movie ah on the TV show or the parents uh, sent their kid uh (ugh), uh away or something like that lor all very normal ah very drama


but when you've really witnessed it like your, your family members then


oh have lor always at the beginning of the work ah


but now you can treat this like a job interview also is like chit chatting ah, oh you don't feel like chit chatting ah, okay okay I feel like chit-chatting


okay what's the, what do you often worry about ah I often worry about money, I guess err that's because I'm a taurus


ya so ah I also was err struggling lah now that I know that I need to save early actually I know very long time ago I need to save early, ya but but, I just don't want to heed the advice I just want to YOLO, and I I still stood by my thinking of being of or doing YOLO


the ya I still think that if I never YOLO at that time, , I wouldn't have experienced all the nice stuff lor but I but, but the expense of my money ah which now I have to do the catching up game lor


so I think the catching up game, because now I also do the insurance thing , think I I I'm doing pretty okay because, I've already transferred the risk of not able to build up my money, to the insurance company ah


I've transferred that risk away, so that now while I'm still building up my money in the event that I suddenly have any illnesses or pass away , that goal will achieve immediately [loh], ya


I think that is what I wanted to share with you correct the other time, the, the the way to transfer this risk and opt and go, err, to another, party


!hais! there is an african proverb child who is not embraced by village will burn it down to funeral !wah! don't have , veyr extreme don't have ah


come so close to start a fire I think don't have lah I think maybe start a spark have ah, , like in company lor where the uh bosses are very lousy ah just cannot


maybe we are embraced by the village that's why we don't feel that way


eh but but will you will you will you help your children next time, I will not leh that's why I never expect my parents to be so actively in helping


!huh! I must look after another kid again , , ya cause maybe you will miss, looking after them, but how are you going to


but how are you going to ensure that your your daughter-in-law won't feel that way


positive experiences


so what is a VBAC


so that time when that time a second time do you want to have the epidural because the first time you take epidural then err, it it somehow affected the the giving birth portion right because you felt like, quite weak right so the


so does that actually motivated you not to have a epidural on a second time


really enjoy meh , ya ya


ya you did and then I tell you not to right then after that right I regret that I never ask you, you cut your fingernails you know, it was so sharp


so what if what if, so what if uh the second time didn't come out as as a natural again leh


positive experience ah actually ah yesterday I was thinking about the flying part right but now I saw one one more new topic describe one of your most memorable travel experience , so I really like the I really like the Osaka trip with you uh for twenty-four hours and and also ah actually the next one ah that


make, most the second memorable travel experience is the vietnam one that we , we did a turn we did ah, , ya I like the short trip it's very exciting and, and not a lot of people will have that kind of experience it's it's like a a very rare kind of thing so for the Osaka we can do the twenty-four hours and then we come back then for the vietnam one right the #ho chi minh# one a bit short ah a bit short


so err that one, that one I think I think can we can do again ah what do you think the #ho chi minh# one ah maybe we can do short trip again, !huh! then like that not not ya not memorable already that one is normal


ya, then like that I might as well do longer, I like it that it's short then everything Pa Pa Pa Pa very quick ya, yes that's got a lot of objective you don't need to dilly dally do things slowly anyway don't have kids at that time we can do very fast


ya lor , suddenly no baggage right !wah! move around so quickly yes, ya so I think that is my positive experience, lor, very simple one ah


err so what, what was your best birthday present no don't have, , I only give myself the best birthday present what the mcdonald birthday


cause I never have a mcdonald birthday eh, err it's it's actually affordable leh, I remember that time still regular mah


yes per pax per pax it's just like uh treating your friends to a happy meal lor, ya ya how much is a happy meal five dollar six dollar


ya so each person like six dollars so you invite like uh thirty friends that's three hundred lor, , party gifts is included in the I think like maybe add another ten dollar or fifteen dollars


ya very very very cheap one, I I think it's very affordable for a, party that err, that people will come and uh enjoy lah I feel I, especially like it when they they treat us like a kid right then we have to, uh hold each other's uh shoulder right and then you do a train and then we will go one round around mcdonald and then after that we go to toilet


together , yes so I , I I make all my friends uh look like a fool like that , yes , then I have to sit on the the birthday boy chair ya


quite fun what just that the food ah very unhealthy ah the birthday cake is super sweet ah, no no no is is you can buy a mcdonald birthday cake, it's just a just normal sponge cake


but everybody get to have a a a happy meal toy, , in a happy world happy meal box , ya like that [orh], Know your turn


share another positive experience


but when you read when you reach your old age right sixty plus years old you can sleep all you want, ya then that's when I know I realise right all the old people right and they like seven AM wake up already because they have


ya , no that is it because right since our like thirties and forties right our body clock has been adjusted by our kid, to wake up at six seven o'clock


so smelly !ee!, , okay, describe a time where you get appreciated for your hard, work have or not appreciate for your hard work ah


I don't know leh when uh, it it depends eh actually depends on the bosses there are some bosses right they do a little bit of thing right you feel appreciated there are some bosses that do a lot of thing right I feel that it's very fake


no it can be like boss A and boss B right like buy breakfast for everybody if I if I like boss A right then I'll think !wah! boss A very appreciate my hard work and then boss B right like !walao! then he's spending money to to to to motivate me to do a hard work


like your boss give you the eighty dollar, #foie gras# meal right, that's


ya , ya, but maybe somebody will like it lor because it's feel that the boss spend a lot of money


do you have any biggest blessing in disguise, have lah have two ah, one is I never go to


uh PC five lor ya, that one I thought was a big loss ah, cause thought can go overseas for, for training, that would because I never go right then I can meet you mah


, then I never go then I can I would not be bonded lah for so long, then I can leave uh earlier leave the job earlier, so that is the I think that's the first, blessing in disguise then the second one is uh that that I didn't manage to go to the middle east for the interview ah


if I have passed it like uh three month or two months earlier right then we will now be in a quite big trouble ah, cause of the COVID incident, right, so I think these two are the biggest blessing in disguise


I have been trying because the middle east one we I tried first time then, I submitted too early then they delayed it right then by the time I set send a second time I need to wait for the period of uh cooling period, that that that that delays a bit so that time when there's a delay I thought !aiya!


a bit , a bit Sian ah like how come it delays, could have been earlier but now if you look back right !wah! it is actually quite lucky that it delay lah if they never delay right that we we we could we could enter at the wrong time because I know some of the the Emirates people ah all came back already


uh, so now they're all jobless ah


so where should we go ah next go Perth again meh, no let's assume that COVID ends lah, , in in uh in uh Berlin in Berlin in greece is it too far like that


go Hawaii [orh] ya


middle east [orh] , ya ah, no lah don't go during summer ah, go during ah, ah I think they will I think they will be like us that time lor be fearful in the first few days ah cause we always hear hear uh middle east as a as a terrorist country right actually it's not


dangerous ah a lot of uh kidnapping actually no really leh they they're they're so they're so rich that they they're they don't bother with all these kind of things lah, hor


ya it actually pretty much like a CBD area like that, they just do their own job they just do their own work just like they they dress the way they though ya differently lah very traditional kind of thing lah, but when you go to the restaurant they actually


they actually more wild than, than than any other country when we when we were at the restaurant, they actually let the kid free run everywhere jump up and down then they enjoy kids' presence, ya to the point I I I was afraid that they were paedophile or something like that you know


ya, oh ya I did not do ah I was with, I was with #di di# ya


it's okay lah I think it's once, I think I don't mind doing more often I wanted to say once, in a lifetime but I think camel riding really not bad ah


or, , !aiya! then you do you do pony riding also the same what, camel also camel can what camel cross


walk across the desert what , , !wah! the okay what, , quite sad ha they got food leh they got food leh they just cannot roam around lah


, I don't know no then I'll be like , then that would be a negative experience, okay, it's okay lah I think the camel riding okay lah maybe can go maybe maybe


ah emirates [orh] the next time don't don't go qatar lah, cause we went qatar already oh, ya don't know, wait until COVID lor COVID finish


no lah everybody need to get COVID lah , see Wuhan now they can have uh they can have beach party, freely eh, because all of them ya all of them have immune system already they have they recently show uh


Wuhan had a had a like a, a clubbing party, everybody never wear masks and then they were clubbing , so ya and they don't have outbreak also I think everybody got, antibodies inside


so hopefully lah we can travel soon I see taiwan also like not bad the taiwan people also never not never really wear mask they wear mask as per their normal daily life like that, but japan japan is still a lot of uh cases uh japan I don't know why they didn't didn't control properly taiwan lor okay


financial related topic


maybe you should start first what are your thoughts on the CPF contribution


I, I agree with you I think this CPF contribution is err is is a very good policy too because I think given that maybe the older generation or when it first started this that they assumed that the citizens don't know how to save money for the future


or lack in err some sort of financial planning and along the way as people get more educated then they know more err I mean they know more about how to save so I think this CPF contribution , it's good err for working adults but I think in terms of


maybe some of the elderlies and freelancers or self-employed it may be kind of a trap they may feel like it's a trap, that's why yes and they feel that they're part of their cash is being tight or taken away and locked up in CPF ya


so for example if I think if somebody who is earning err one thousand five hundred versus


fifteen thousand of course gonna make a very big difference ya for to to be ya to have twenty twenty-seven percent is it I can't remember what's the


but then it means that they either have to keep working or they're, disciplined enough to have cash savings on hand if they need, to ya


, but I think this is still uh only beneficially ah I mean only beneficial to those who are the high-income earners if I'm only earning two thousand five a month as like a fresh grad right why would I want to contribute to SRS when my take home pay is only like err one plus


I err it's already barely enough to pay for your insurance for your bills or parents, and if you have other commitments then how am I supposed to contribute to SRS usually in my opinion for people who contribute to SRS is because their income is so high and can excess of cash


and of course then oh why not I should just put it in SRS since uh it will help me save and err save up for retirement and reduce tax so it's still I feel it's still beneficial to the high income earners but not so much the, the low to middle-income earners I mean the people that I know who have contribute to SRS voluntarily are those who earn uh who have a certain earning power


, , and the SRS itself


is really to help you save for retirement and to to help you save on taxes I think most people use it to save on taxes instead, it's no I'm not sure can't remember


oh I think it's for as long as it's as long as as long as the zero point zero five percent per annum


it's the same as your savings account in the in like say DBS POSB bank


I don't think it's five percent of first oh right right ya after that it's two point five


again pardon what do you mean


the investment scheme


so what about you what have you done in order to, to uh


in my personal opinion it's always to clear liabilities first so I would say clear off the loan before you can I mean it's good to set aside some, err probably err a percentage that you think you can manage then I think you should still pay off the liabilities


but it should have been done I think in when you first started working okay err ya that's why I say you should still set aside a certain amount


oh so given these two options I would choose the first one five thousand and one thousand for savings, I think you can if you have an idea of what the three thousand you want to do this three thousand is it further split into investments or is it just purely being put into err the bank account because if it's just purely putting in the bank account I don't think it's gonna do you much


so I would say then further split the three thousand into doing some sort of investment and savings


okay okay, ya I think you can do that yes


I think everybody has a very different view on money so you cannot just ask me like oh should I do this or should I do that yes you can listen and you can also go onto forums like I I do read a forum called seedly is like a forum app an all in one


seed seedly, dly ya so people go on to that app or platform to share uh I mean some somewhat like what you asking me now should I do this do that and then different people have different ways of managing money so you can read up on it uh I mean if you go into the forum and see what


what some people do or ask for suggestions and err, ya maybe you will get answer some of them are are traditionally the type that would save a sum first and then some they're very ambitious so they will also start investing as well


, ya I actually wanted to ask you what what would you err recommend uh for somebody who's planning for a big-ticket item so for instance maybe when you buy a first car right how did you how did you plan to to to get into that


what was your strategy, ya what what was your what was your strategy in order to afford a car at that time


oh


uh no no no actually that's not what I'm asking I'm actually asking how did you plan for to to buy your first car when you when you first started working


I know so I what I'm what I'm trying to say what I'm trying to say is how did you come about to have uh to be able to afford the car financially


it's not whether it's not how you landed the decision, (uh huh) yes (uh huh)


so it was your month so, your strategy at that point in time as you told your mom that you want to buy a car and then she said okay you you shall set aside this amount every month for how long did you do it for


okay so err thereafter once you see the amount that's enough for a deposit you just went ahead, to purchase the car


the deposit of a car, okay , okay, uh


I see okay I think , (ppc)


I actually have I mean maybe err, some years back I've been thinking about it, I mean it's either doing something else freelance


or err to sell something like an online business err, ya online business I guess because then err because I have a full-time job, so to seek another employment is difficult given that I have family as well so


if you ask me what I can do to earn extra income I would say either taking out taking on ad hoc jobs or really setting up like uh online business where there's minimal


because I don't want I don't really have a firm plan in mind because, day to day I'm currently very maxed out, uh with everything actually I barely have enough sleep, so it's difficult yup


okay


okay actually can I ask you something I would actually want to know how you have planned since you said that your parents or our parents have not really err taught us about, uh savings right managing money so what would you want to plan for your children or what do you have in mind


okay I see


no I'm not asking about me I'm asking about your children what do you have in mind for them I think


, okay


actually three dollars a day for a child is quite a lot I think for I I know of some parents who only give like ten dollars a week so so I think


three dollars a day is a lot but but I mean in in in terms of in terms of teaching the concept of money I think it's quite interesting to see whether or not he will use it to make a purchase or to save it, for instance I guess ya


okay okay okay


actually since ya okay then since COVID right have you made any changes to your spending or saving habits or do you has it have no effect on you at all


really


but, but I remember spending a lot more on groceries every trip we went to the supermarket is like


but really mostly actually transport you are the one that is taking up the bulk of it cause , uh ya okay but I think for us in order not to, sacrifice our spending habits we trying to find extra income in order to maintain ours


spending habits in fact spending and saving habits, ya that's why you took on extra jobs to find income ya


negative experiences


I'm actually reading through the questions , that's quite a lot that we can talk about , , maybe you want to start first or what ya sure


okay maybe maybe I'll share that one , I would say that that is a (hmm), negative experience but I can't put words to it whether it was stressful sad or traumatic I think it's a mix


because when we first decided to hire a helper was of course to lighten our workload, but, it didn't and it brought us even more trouble yes this helper didn't really do anything bad per se like


, steal or hurt my children but it's still quite a , , unfortunate event that happened during a bad time so it became uh I don't know whether it's unlucky I think it's unlucky and just bad timing that uh during COVID period she has had high fever


then keep telling us that she's unwell then it has to get swabbed and this is due all before circuit-breaker and once she has err, returned home she had sufficient rest but, she didn't take care of herself didn't want to eat


didn't I don't know sleep early, and then in the end it was diagnosed that she has TB, and that was during circuit breaker where the, kids are at home and I still have to work full time and have to take on chores at the same time it was just really difficult and from actually from circuit breaker until now


I still feel, exhausted like super super tired everyday, uh, ya she hasn't the cleaning wasn't done properly and, we have to check her into the hospital so either one of us has to be uh getting out of work


to get her to the doctor uh to the x-ray clinic, to the hospital and then have to follow up (ppc) excuse me follow up with that, ah and then the bills keep piling up for her hospital bills and at that point in time we don't know whether or not it's claimable there's a cap the cap was fifteen thousand


and during the interview when we called the hospital it was already at eight thousand thereabout ya so that was worrying because it was also at the same time where uh you said you may be out of job, , so ya that was stressful I guess


and because we didn't have a lot of help from err family members already that's why we decided to hire a helper because they're old or they're unable to uh so it was just , kind of glad that this phase has passed but then we are back to square one when we are tired everyday with not much help


cause you were fearful, oh so you were aware as in you knew, you you were aware oh okay


actually I feel like I worry a lot every day, uh


about, myself my career I feel because I'm focusing a lot on the kids right I'm doing nothing for myself I'm worried that, eventually when they grow up I'll feel like there's


nothing left for me oh , because the kids will leave and you'll, grow up what so I understand that but then what do I have of myself than I have no career to to talk about I have not done anything for myself either,


so ya, not just about money it's not about money it's about having a a a goal


but is it because we don't have time or


I used to have ya used to like to dance err, err, not so much exercise just dancing the most part is dancing actually


but at for people like my, age group I don't know where to go to , I mean when I'm when I'm in my hello I'm not I'm not gonna I'm not gonna do line dancing right


right , ya but I think it's quite sad that do do not have any hobbies or goals, at this point in time because all I can think about is, making through every day


making sure that making sure the kids, making sure the kids eat sleep are happy whether they're going fine is a never-ending worry


when they reach primary school is still err let's see how many years to go six years to, go and then in primary, but in when you when they are six when they're in primary school then you will think about how how they're gonna do academically whether or not they're gonna survive in a primary school


and then uh, make it past the next year the next stage whether they are behinds behinds their friends, ya, so I think


!ugh! this is very yes very ya especially when, for myself ya actually for both I want to worry for my kid whether uh I want them to be


on track with other kids their age and the same time, because I spend so much eh time and energy into them !hais! I just lost, focus of on myself totally like completely I feel


subjective I guess how successful what what is successful


!huh! have to see what's the reason of them not performing well,


, I am trying , because I really feel very, upset err


when I lose my temper at them afterwards ah if you think of it as an afterthought you will like ah why do I have to say that why do I have to do that at a point in time when I'm angry


it also me and my friend me and my friend has discussed this before it really depends on, your parenting style if you are okay with them sleeping at twelve o'clock or eating whatever they want


then actually I think it'll be much easier it's about the control I think


okay have, you been let's see


uh the one that she tried to groom


but she has put up very strong front leh every time I see her she's still smiley


ya !hais! I don't think of that leh I don't think of things like that I try not, (ppc)


somebody losing a son ah basically, , ya it is, uh, describe a time where you feel that nothing you do is good enough


oh really I think for me it's always, interviews job interviews I'm very disappointed with , myself in job interviews I don't know whether it's job interviews or maybe just I don't know job interviews are difficult and very very stressful for me


but I don't feel like it's chit-chatting , not so not very much ya


, I don't think so I because before this you you didn't really worry about money you were quite like living the life when you see money you spend it


kind of person uh, you didn't heed the advice


okay


okay, ya I think that is very extreme I also had I haven't felt that before so I think it's quite uh it's very extreme measure and I will never do it lah


why I I don't, I I generally won't do uh I I won't do the things that I don't want others do to me so I'm never the type of the this kind of very revengeful behaviour I don't do it


but uh upset okay but it just feels like okay the child is not embraced by the village, (hmm) I don't know maybe, no lah I'm just I'm just I'm just err a bit upset I'd be quite upset that err


err, like uh our our parents are not the type of parents who are, like very enthusiastic with grandchildren so that's where we don't have a lot of help and to the point that so if I were to see and other err if I would again once again if I were to compare but comparing is always like you only see the bad side lah but comparing with other


moms they have a lot of help from their family that just kinda, sucks for me , that's that's something that I thought of also


, okay X I (hmm) but maybe your thinking may change I don't know


ya maybe I will, I don't know, ya, I don't want them to feel the same way as I feel


well then I guess maybe it's to give and take and bond with my daughter-in-law in the future, ya, so the in-law problem is one thing that is like, quite negative in my life


, ya and I feel that it's because the husband the son which is you did not try to mediate or be the mediator you have you have to be but you're not doing it


me err I think the most positive experience in my life so far one of the most memorable is being able to do VBAC successfully last year so v


okay so VBAC is a vaginal birth after caesarian so for my first kid it was an emergency C sect and I was quite disappointed to be honest because, I know my mom went through that and I didn't want to err


go through the same thing, but in the end unfortunately I wasn't able to dilate fully and my gynae then wasn't very supportive if I think she's quite pro-caesarian uh so for my second child I decided that I I want to give VBAC a try because


to me personally if I have not experienced the birth process, then it's not really called giving birth and it's only gonna be once or twice in my life it's not like I tend to have five kids eh will have chance again and I will have like the youth again so I decided that I was gonna I was determined to go for it so I have my doubts


but then err in the end I mean I succeeded lah so it was very empowering, and ya kinda like a !yay! I did it moment


yes correct cause so for a lot of, uh, ya definitely cause the first time round actually because I gathered information from like you know other mums right so they all say that you should definitely go for epidural in fact even my gynae said why do you want to go through the pain just take epidural so that you can relax and


enjoy while the contraction is going on but for me no when I took the, epidural it was err this for some people will react differently to epidural and I was one of them so I had side effects like uh chills vomiting I was just


feeling super miserable and I was curling up on the bed and the nurses telling me you should not be doing this you need to lie on your back cause we need to monitor the contractions and heartbeat yada yada but, err so at that point in time, uh the epidural really had a very I mean negative effect on me to the point that I was very tense it's not really helping me to relax at all so I couldn't dilate so for the second time I try to really err endure the contractions until I can no longer take it


and then before going to the hospital and, since I was already I think five CM dilated that was already halfway there uh I just stopped maybe I could just wait a little bit longer but then I think at maybe seven or so it was really too late and the nurses were saying that ah no problem then they just help me manually


do it so there was no, there was actually no time for me to react to whether or not I want epidural I mean I did beg for one but uh, of course of course ya


oh you must understand that the you must understand that the pain right is not like your usual it it's not the usual fall kind of pain you know or not like your muscle ache, it is like I don't know how to describe it's just a get-it-out-of-me-right-now kind of feel so ya


ah ya so, I really felt the whole thing and ya it was really really fun and for once in a lifetime will do , oh then it will be become


a negative experience in my life it will be a dead disappointing experience in my life, ya what about you maybe you share one positive experience


ya ya actually I think maybe two days one night or three days two nights will be good, too long okay oh you mean even two days one night,


okay, ya ya when you have no when you have no kids along you can do everything very quickly


, (uh huh) do you remember how it costs how much it costs for a McDonald's breakfast ah breakfast sorry McDonald's birthday party


it is uh your twenty first birthday right so do they count by like per pax, [orh] same and and then it I think so


and then but what about like the party games and what not


the don't you have to bring your own


oh okay maybe that's where you made a wrong choice by buying it, okay


ah I will share (hmm) what do you used to hate as a kid but now I love as an adult actually there's a lot of things that you know you don't appreciate as a kid !hey!


I used to hate uh showering and sleeping I guess , that's why I always sleep very late cause I feel like , I feel like sleeping was a waste of time where I can watch drama watch movies, uh okay not as a kid maybe err as a kid you want to stay up and play right


but now you I would love to sleep I will, I know right that's what that's what I heard like you will wake up and thinking I think like uh what you are going to do today


, no I think my I think my dad wakes up even earlier like they say that the body will automatically wake up at six plus


maybe , maybe possibly so ya because your body has this like bioclock but ya besides I I also used to hate showering I was telling my sister I remember that what do we need to shower what a waste of time ,


err no waste of time like I could use that time to I don't know watch TV, I don't know maybe I wasn't a smelly kid


, no maybe you maybe I think for you that's more applicable maybe you can share


so what other things for example what have your the boss


I think I think pretty much the same, if ya pretty much the same


ya, cause it's something that I don't really eat so ya, I know I don't think so I think being appreciative is when you least expected it whether it is uh by a note


or maybe an email or even just a small snack that somebody bought along the way because thought of you I think that's that's really nice, ya but I don't have a time that I feel that way yet


uh, I cannot think of anything now do you have any


(mmhmm)


(mmhmm), I okay I think for me, I just remembered I think a lot of thing a lot of the positive experiences are travel experiences cause err uh


ever since I got married right seldom travel with my parents and all along err and when we were we were kids and in teenagers eh in teenage years, I think knowing that my dad doesn't earn a lot but he will still make it a point to at least bring us to travel once a year so one of the


memorable trip would be the one where we, all travel to Perth together because my dad and mom don't speak, much english, so they'll be fearful of countries like


australia or any western countries lah basically and so to be able to bring them there was really nice and I mean my mum still remembers it till date so I guess she really quite, uh enjoyed it and instead of living in hotels we stayed at Airbnbs we


drove them around visited farms and by then we had one child so I think they also bonded with the grandchild, eh ya that was really nice where


I don't know it depends on when COVID ends isn't it or which one, or with the entire family where shall I bring them next (hmm) I don't know


I don't know I don't know whether they're up for it or not , my dad and my dad is very traditional so he likes I don't know taiwan china asian countries where he is where he can read write and understand but I always wanted to bring him


to you know somewhere where he that's a bit too far, I think I want to bring him somewhere where uh, ya maybe right the heat will be a killer though


, (oo), , dangerous ya


and actually they're pretty much like I don't know singapore I feel


ya it is differently lah just dressed differently


for which one (uh huh), !oops! ya because they love kids they love kids


no ya but they love kids ah they love kids yes oh then one more memorable one would be camel riding with my, sons it was really, fun ya I mean eh ya you


I would want to do it again I think the one we went to was like more of a tourist trap lah we didn't go to the proper like camel riding experience but it's okay lah I think it's fine


ha I went to read up on this after that and I felt guilty because camel riding is like elephant riding it's also ya like exploiting animals and then uh this kind of like err a bummer,


but horses are meant to be ridden mah pony and horses are they pony can carry weight right, eh , but it's the way they are treated you see, where is the way they're treated no I don't think so I think the camels there are quite


!ugh! ya quite sad just because , so if I just give you food is it enough ya it's the same thing right, ya


okay


ya COVID is really !ugh! a killer for everybody, oh is it I didn't


oh I didn't know about that


I would actually choose to go either taiwan or japan next if you ask me cause I feel like it's, then, then taiwan lor yup


financial related topic, okay financial related topic


ah definitely because I think for me basically we do events so we're definitely very badly hit so there's been likes basically no income coming in for a couple of months already so definitely I will actually, have a lot of difference in my spending in the past is quite common where you know you bring your kids you treat your kids to a to to a good meal or you go to the restaurant at a very where normally we'll do that


but right now I guess uh also because of the, uh locked down I've learn to cook, so I I I started to realise that eh actually cooking it's so much cheaper and when I go out I I see that I see that western meal or or go to a restaurant and see that that price tags eh I can do it at home at half the price so actually we we have been yeah so actually we have been doing quite a bit of cooking at home


and of course we have been uh, that's basically stop shopping lah we basically stop shopping yeah and uh also when we, yeah, yeah I mean I did, only make one online shopping purchase ah other than that


ah unless is really super good deal I mean right recently there's a lot of good deals coming on right so have also have to be very specific what we really need and not what we really want ya so that's for me what about you


quite fulfilling right


yeah, yeah that's right, especially also less SM uh MSG also it's healthier


but but in terms of saving do you do you manage to actually do any savings during this period of time


yeah


yeah I I totally agree with you because I think prior COVID you know we really think that uh times will always be good but right now when you are really, down it's quite a humbling experience and I think it is is also a a a lesson learnt that yeah that that savings and investments is truly important because


if really can you you really don't have no income for a couple of months I mean we never imagine that will happen right yeah so I think


yeah, yeah, and and also I think


posts COVID I think we we also need to uh think of, ways to actually uh , especially if because of our age as we are ageing right we really need need to find , uh income that doesn't come with too much labour in a in that sense like investment I think so that one is something that I really need to to to to learn lah basically


yeah, yeah that's important, yeah yeah that's true


yeah true, and so so how do you invest your money to accumulate wealth and uh planning for your retirement


yeah, ya but because I I actually had a few I I don't know it say as a bad experience or what but because like many years ago like when it's first maybe like easily like fifteen years ago I mean like there are some investments that made I mean also invested via investment linked kind of a plan right


and and after I and I realised like after fifteen years I I I I barely made a thousand dollars in that sense I mean of course they were a lot on up and down times in I know this fifteen years but, it it it's really quite disappointing to see that kind of amount right ya


I guess my my my issue was because I I I didn't really bother about, uh whether it's making money I just let it as it is right and I think that that agent that was uh basically serving me I think either left or something like that so I, I just let let it rot inside and then when just when I needed it and I took out my money I realise oh my goodness I just made a thousand dollars out of fifteen years that's quite ridiculous lah in that sense lah so I can guess right now is


is really learning to be more more involved in your investment lah right isn't it,


(mmhmm),


(mmhmm) yeah, but that's, but that's not normal


right the trends of it is really not normal , I suspect it will be


(uh huh) !wow! that's good, so must quickly earn first lah , ya ya I really have to watch because suddenly it goes up that high it will suddenly might might just drop, ya cause as for me I'm not very savvy with all these investments and stuff so I mean because my husband is more of a okay you know the property investment is always the safest because eventually you get yourself a a a a roof over your head or you can sell it so to him it's an an asset


but right now looking at the property prices I don't I don't see it really escalating a lot I mean in the past I think you can really earn a lot so initially we we were hoping that eh you know uh after we bought this other uh apartment we can actually really keep it for a retirement but then , uh I've been looking at the at the price of my apartment it it is not really growing and and of course now with


COVID and all everything seems to be on the stand still even if I choose to like if if if uh, finances is so bad that it will affect me that I need to sell it it is it also will be a bad time to sell isn't it so in in a way you are kind of kind of like stuck


so but but in the but he still feels or or maybe we we share the same view lah we still feel that eventually if we can continue to rent it and you know it can the the the the rental can cover the mortgage it as long as possible until we sell it it would we would definitely be quite a good


good savings lah in terms of uh in terms of an investment nah because eventually you get a lump sum and then it's up to you whether you want to decide to to get another property if not then you use that amount of money to invest


yeah, , ya I mean okay


ah we continue yeah so so for me it's just a matter of ya lor waiting for the time to come maybe we can just do another topic maybe like what is the what's your thoughts on, CPF contribution,


, yes, ya I actually totally agree with I mean especially with the fact that right now the government is coming out with all the retirement uh CPF funds which I which I think it actually makes very good ah


growth lah in right in it is it four per cent for some or uh if I'm not wrong, , yeah I mean the, ya is it I know the retirement fund where they say that you know if you put in about two hundred or three hundred I mean depending on how much you put in then it can you can safely say at the certain age then you can receive like a thousand two thousand dollars depending on the amount of money you have inside ya


yeah


(mmhmm), okay, yeah


, okay got it


yeah because I mean for for for me I've been self employed for so long that's why we we don't get that much of uh CPF contribution in in the past I would think that !aiya! it's a waste of time I would rather use that money to to actually invest right or do something about it but then now at the looks with all the things that the government is trying to do


I think eh actually is is is it it it's really good to have more CPF lah you know I've I should I could have and should have contributed to the CPF way back and then now I'm I will have more money to do the so called retirement fund lah you know


yeah, yeah I think so ya, so


ah positive ah in terms of finance ah , ah, I will only say cause we still in the in the finance topic right we still in the finance topic ya ya ya ya we still in finance topic yeah


ah yeah so I guess I I I, think like maybe you say in in COVID time what is the the positivity that we want to see out of this entire thing right, I think I think a lot of us will


I I think a lot of new businesses will come in I I think a lot of new businesses will come in lot different ideas will come in a lot of traditional things may go so I I think if I would, see lah actually if we are opportunists and we are ah creative actually by right there should be many ways of of us earning


some kind of an income other than doing what we're doing I mean because honestly we wouldn't know that COVID will hit again right and and the industry which is travel on the events definitely would be hit again and then it'll be back to us right in the same situation all over again so I think it it it is time to


really re-think and yeah re-think of, ya correct correct ya re-design, yeah


but I I didn't know that uh, the government I mean I don't know they were, told the right entrepreneurs and and and and companies SMEs actually can actually, get some grant to go digitised to digitised their company it in that sense you know to to help


them to help them out lah to go through this transit from the traditional to to digital but of course as we know grants, right not easy to get and then like their fulfilments you also need to give in that sense ya ya okay


negative experiences, negative experiences, okay, so I guess recently I just have a negative one actually this morning even before we started is pretty negative but okay let's


so maybe not talk about that yeah what what is something that uh I will say lah maybe I'll start first lah ah what what what disgust me I I I think , maybe in a sense I feel that uh


uh, as we come to this certain age I think, uh respect, certain (ugh) I think respect for each other it's is is important and I I think is is is a must in a relationship I mean we come to this point where already this age I feel sometimes your threshold for


for nonsense is it's actually way down and not as, uh naive as before, so I I I I really really what really irks me is people, who are rude


who are rude and who are who, does not that respect people lah I mean I I see I see the way people treat I mean I I I don't know I mean maybe I will touch on this like in terms of our uh occupation, our our different races you know like I I really it really disgusts me to see people who were looked down or talk down to people who are earning a decent living even if they're cleaning the tables or they are


uh clearing the rubbish I mean it it it may not be the nicest smell but I feel sometimes I would I'll in fact I would, feel that I'm very proud of this people because I don't think I can get myself to do a job like that you know what I'm saying, like I feels they they they should be given credit for especially now during COVID all those people who are doing the cleaning or whatever ah


yeah I I I just so basically I, I just , uh look not say look down but I I 'd, I it disgust me took I mean uh disgust me when I see people who just because, they are they have it well they have it good


they are rich and then they despised people, like that yeah,


yeah, yeah


, yeah that's what


yeah and I think respect it's is, despite the person's , job the person's


race I think it it it is basic respect for humans lah I I I just feel lah that's why sometimes when you see all those stomp or whatever news or people being nasty or like to the security guard I mean there are instances right and, those that big will big hoo-ha you you you


talk to this person like that I mean honestly sometimes like you will you will know eh even sometimes when, like delivery people like for example if you go in oh you cannot cannot the security will say, no no no but if you see a a person driving in a big car


they will they will not question it, it it you know I mean it it is that kind of the disparity lah in, the and the treatment or ya so anyway ya that that's what frustrates me lah in that sense, yeah


, , oh


oh


yeah, oh so did she just disappeared lah in a way just MIA and


, until now you still think of it


yeah


yeah yeah it's where I knew actually I want the the nicest people around yeah, that's why I I also


is it because of office politics also, i guess,


everybody is,


, yeah


, yeah yeah I know where you coming from, yeah


so I


that's why he also that's why he also encouraged you to leave lah, , ya cause I think , ya talking talking about that so I think yeah you just yeah it's just kind of reminded me again just from the previous topic really


is our life we are in our in our forties right I mean it it is time to make a decision on how you want to live your life lah the people you want to spend with away from toxic people and yeah we don't we don't need that kind of rubbish in that sense lah right


yeah, unless you see a purpose of you being there to help this person change or I I don't know get things better then if not then it's like, I just need


better yeah too much to handle, yeah, is there is there's something that you that you watch or read that give you, goosebumps ah for me I just thought of something, that I thought is quite nice to discuss no no I mean just recently I just read about this this


lady I mean there was this neh I think serene they all shared right there was this, car accident and then the, the husband the the the husband, died on the spot I think he was driving a comvertible or something yeah yeah, oh is it I didn't know he was a property agent


yeah in the ya correct, so so that's when I it it it it just dawned on me when I read the story of what this lady went through and then it just bring bring a lot of memories about all those , you know sudden deaths in the family of people that you love especially even you remember the mcdonald's case where there were two


kids, such lovely kids the #kor kor# went to pick up the the <mandarin>弟弟:di di</mandarin> from school and then they were hit by a cement truck, and they both died on the spot right , it's !wah! yeah, I remembered I


I was affected for a long period of time days I was every day ah I will cry because when I think of it I will tear like I cannot, imagine that kind of pain that the parents will go through seeing two kids go at the same time and they so young you know


and, ya so that one is (ugh) that especially that incident I I I it just comes back to, I mean I don't know yeah like how will we deal with, death of a loved ones in our lives right I mean uh


the closest to us always our parents or our husband and children or you know so I I I think things like that are, ah, things that I will, think about and and say that if one day this happens how how should I embrace it because to me especially for parents right I mean it's a matter of time


that they will go before you yeah, or unless some reason you know the the younger one will go but it it's something that I dread you you you can also put it together like the the greatest fear, for me is really to


lose uh a loved one lah, that's why they always say that the the the pain the heart the, heart the pain in the heart is , , cannot describe you know you cannot describe it the pain it's just undescribable, so yeah


yeah,


, yeah, so it's yeah it's difficult because they they will say that like you know, the house suddenly became very quiet


right like you you used to have two kids, waving at them and yelling daddy daddy when they were downstairs only and they coming up they will be welcoming the father then suddenly all these has it's gone so ya, I think I think it came to he came to terms with it after he


uh he had a dream, he had a dream because I I I heard the testimony after that he had a dream, uh, that he almost, I can't remember something ah even you know my memories not very good is he it he almost killed somebody


or something like that, and then he felt, the, the fear the guilt the everything, and he woke up and he thought this was exactly the feelings that the cement driver was feeling, cement truck driver so he


he feels yeah it's an accident is an accident so I think after that he slowly managed to, forgive, forgive lah because , very hard right very hard to forgive right but he he he realised it really


he felt it and he know this is very terrible for the other guy also and then he said what if it happens to him if he's the one who accidentally run into somebody so the same way he would also needed to be set free from the forgiveness lah from the other parties parents or whatever so


the ya that that was very sad and then ah I I think eventually he also slowly, uh face to face he he got , out of the, sadness and also I think he he dreamt of his son, the sons telling him and I mean he saw them and they were having a good time they were happy very happy


and they are in the better place lah so I think that that is a comfort lah it's a parents' ultimate comfort, ya ya lor


could move on, ya, I mean it it is over lah right just have to, move on [loh] right, ya, so I think that that one to me is the is the one


one story I cannot I mean not story even ah it's a incident that, hor, very hard to , yeah


yeah, so sometimes I think, like like I I just remembered my my my friend I think in secondary school I think in it when we were in JC she's in JC that's when her her her boyfriend got into an accident


together with the two older siblings, in the states so the the parents lost three children at one time at one go, ya one is in JC one is uh uh going into the uni and one is studying overseas


so three are all bright students doing well <mandarin>乖乖:guai guai</mandarin> you know they are they are they are basically good kids ah good kids doing well but who knows something such a tragedy can happen right, so I I also but at that time I was very young lah at that time we are still young


maybe in our below twenty years old, wouldn't imagine that kind of pain but now when when revisit this incident I'll think like !wow! it's it's cannot leh cannot cannot handle one that's why I think I will faint and then I will just collapse or die or whatever three children you bring them up so long ah and then after so many years right so


ya, ya it's very tough


positive experiences, positive experiences, okay I think this one we discuss it before described a travel experience that left you in awe


yeah we were, , ya I think we were only twenty five or something yeah, we we we we embark on a uh uh


a last minute trip to the to the states right the two of us, ya was the first in fact we we've been friends for so long but it's the first time we actually travelled together, just the two of us right


yeah we we started off in LA and then, we went to, grand canyon and then to san francisco


she knew, ya she knew we're going to the airport because that bus right remember when we left the bus because I think we need to buy another ticket or something to top up I can't remember what was the issue then we went to the station to top up thinking that the bus will wait for us but it didn't and that was a kind of like ya


after the bus gone there will be no more bus will be late already so I think this lady was sitting there and she saw the entire scenario right and then she offered to drive us to the airport, number one number one we like where is the airport we have no idea where the airport is number two we don't know how long the distance is and then we just grab get into her car and she say how much ah


ya ya, ten or twenty USD ah ten or twenty USD


I can't remember, ya ya ya, like right now we think back like oh my goodness anything could have happen to us we could have been driven up to some place sold or I don't know what can happen to us seriously


yeah, ya , ,


yeah, yeah, yeah yeah


so is it it when you looked back it we're in awe lah and then there at other incidents where we, where we that the that we were in grand canyon and then the coach didn't come and for some reason a car came, a guy and it was a man and then said eh you know the your coach is not uh coming anymore some some hiccups so I'm going to drive you to your destination right and I'm like and then we like oh no another one of these are we going into the car then and we still did right we still did


ya so , yeah, yeah


yeah and we were we're just like thinking that kind what kind of adventures we had in the past like !wow! unbelievable right now if you ask me to do it no way , right right we won't, we won't make that


the dangers, yes I also thinks too


ya true but that was it was it was fun lah I don't think I'll be able to do a trip like this again right, you think,


yeah, ya ya but it was fun lah it was fun,


yeah, yeah yeah now we are still both safe you know and all still alive , yeah, so what about uh anything that uh , what is your which one


oh my best surprise I have actually I have two best surprises I mean it both it comes back to my kids I mean like initially I thought !aiya! you know, is it so difficult to have children why people have children so easy you know why is it so tough for me and then my doctor was still telling me that I should go for IVF say what what is that I'm so young you know why why should I go to for that so it was it was


it it was a a (ugh) very daunting very discouraged ha I have to do all this just to have my first kids so it but but but sure enough uh , I I think it was within a few months I went for this oh ya ya ya I remembered


I went for this uh chinese doctor this this chinese doctor was truly from china one it was my friend's contact she said oh this lady comes twice a year when she comes from china she's a military doctor in in in china so when she comes she will gather a group of people and this group of people will go and see her so I told this lady eh


I I I trying to get a kid you know, uh but the doctor say that because I got endometriosis so maybe uh it's hard to get a child, and she said no problem, and she just gave me two bunch of peanuts


roasted peanuts you know hot roasted peanuts she put on my ears and then after that she take this needle and she poke it I I I'm not sure she use a penknife she she she did at few cuts or one or two cuts on my ears and then I <mandarin>是不是放:shi bu shi fang</mandarin> uh bleed ah it just do bit of bleeding she showed me eh my blood is brown you know


and then she also did something to my back and then it suck out the blood I tell you it was bad I had signed for ten sessions but I couldn't do ten I told her I'll do only five cause it's so painful , but eventually right after that I I I would I conceive lah and another lady having the same issue also conceive at the same time as me after meeting her so


it was quite amazing that was something that really really it was a surprise for me ah, that it I can actually have uh kid just going to this lady right and she said <mandarin>没有问没没有问题：mei you wen mei mei you wen ti</mandarin> I can do it for you you know then after that later on uh for my girl was like so many years later just when I about to give up I said if I hit forty and if I'm not going to have a kid


then so be it you know right before I hit forty, I I conceived so is like ah okay so I have a very young child to take care of now


yeah, yeah ya, yeah


sibling ya, oh , , after so many years ah


, ya, ya I I I'm thanks thanks I'm also quite happy with that, okay wait ah I think I have uh mute


ya very cute cats


ya you confused my kids


ya trainable you know yeah and it I that's the first time I see a cat that can be trained, yeah like dogs eh


yeah , eh but it actually brings a lot of joy where I mean I mean I always think that it's equivalent like you have children or you have pets, and some more you have two cats I also very surprised that you actually get two cats , yeah


ya really really nice


and and and cats ultimately it's still easier to take care of than, oh like a dogs or or or or yeah, I mean they they were kind of Manja and it will coming to you and then after that it when they also need their alone time


so is, ah they sleep most of the time, such a nice right I I also like their cats eh I'm going to meet your cats


very soon is there is there anys is there anything that amazes, you or ,


I think for ya I share lah I think I I I think what amazes me is the human spirit lah I I I'm very amazed I mean even during this COVID times I I think, there are a lot of people that are down and out but yet


there are so many people who were bother to help I mean for me honestly to be very honest I I think I have my limited capacity like I ah, when I'm I think it now that you know uh I mean of course there are events coming up now not so bad but when I'm down when I feel that I I'm down I don't I'd I find it very hard to actually


help or do anything else but be you know kind of like trapped inside your your your situation right I mean I mean it's like like in recent like even like black panther like you heard right I I I I'm actually very shock, and then and very amazed by by this man because I mean he's he's luke's favourite is my son's favourite character and I also like him very much I I can't imagine a person like him who is who is so so


uh I don't know what you call that so hardworking and still still on the go even when he was actually diagnosed with colon cancer right and and I can't I can't I honestly cannot imagine how can a person who is sick, be still driven and to still produce such good works and and and most people will reveal it


you know so that when you do certain certain things you know people will !aiya! you know you are sick lah okay lah give you chance or or or or pardon you you know maybe you know uh don't have that kind of high expectation from you but I'm, surprise that he he didn't even reveal it


I mean I don't know how how much the people close to him knows lah I mean the producers directors or whatever but I I'm shocked lah I actually very amazed lah where and how much uh (ugh) he's like a true black panther you know like uh hor a person who is


ya so ya so I'm very inspired yeah, yeah


yeah,


yeah, yeah, yeah and nobody knows about it right just suffer in silence right yeah


yes yeah, ya so I think in in times like this when I when I when I see people like that I am very encourage lah right


yes I also agree and what about what about you like uh do you have any at first I thought about this question what was the proudest moment of your life is it a moment we actually proud of ourselves


like when you, when you did what you did in in fact I'm I'm actually very uh, I must give it to you lah like you know you've been working for the longest time and then suddenly you just come out and do your own thing so I I I'm, I'm very proud of you lah in a in a way I feel that it is is as is a tough step to to take but you did it and a lot of things I realise you'll be learning on your own a lot of things you struggle on your own you you you you


in fact I think you got a very positive spirit which I think yeah I would say that I would think that I'm very proud of you lah you know,


, waters


, , !wah! that's quite uh


yeah yeah because actually


, ya I actually don't expect myself to , to be doing this for so long ya


yeah, yeah so I guess , but but I I I think the only sometimes I also think you know eh is it good to be employed if I would have stuck to you know


being employed and then maybe I'll be uh some just some manager you know I just be happy getting a pay but then I think but we we actually are we actually have a lot of pockets of time I mean that kind of freedom we get you don't get it when you are working for somebody right


ya ya yes, I think that is something that you are telling me that I should do okay


okay we're done


financial related topic, financial related topic


okay, so uh lydia we were it you know what's your view on uh your post know, post COVID world whether any changes in in terms of your spending and savings habits


yeah, , ya I know right, yeah


, even even for online shopping,


right yes, correct yeah correct, correct ya, ya same err I mean I'm also freelancing right so uh


pretty much also doing events uh the meet the uh one small portion of events but uh because, events are not uh coming in and a lot of jobs are being cancel because of COVID so of course I I have to watch my spending uh more carefully so really spend what I I need and uh in in terms of uh the essential items like food transport and even clothings right


uh so of course clothings not so much now ah we just bear with what we have, and uh for for food right uh I'm also cooking a lot more uh and I find that cooking is uh can be quite an enjoyment and I


even just a simple stuff uh and the joy of cooking is actually quite uh , quite quite quite good , a yeah a lot of joy actually and kind of like find the uh kind find it fun doing it and so because of this right I I same like you I find that cooking at home is definitely a more


uh it's cheaper and uh yeah and and we can cook whatever we like maybe a a a meal that is ten dollars out there we can cook to easily cook it at five dollars alright yeah so it's like a huge savings there lah


ya, ya ya and healthier I agree yeah, not so much savings now because uh there's not much income uh coming in so uh


basically the spending is is fairly to, cut down on the spending and yeah and savings is uh of course, post COVID I would like to see that if jobs are coming back and then I can save like uh at least twenty thirty per cent of my income and uh you know save it for a rainy day like this again if any COVID situation or or uh


any situation that it comes in uh in, future so we are I'll I'll be able to uh you know fund myself in in uh, low period,


yes yeah, yes


yeah, and it did yeah it it would I mean COVID it if we thought that is a three months thing or something or even lesser but it turns out to be could be more than a year yeah so it really sets us sets us, thinking of how we can actually uh be more prudent with our financial uh


planning, yeah, ,


yes yes, yeah correct, and hopefully we can find something that is like uh help with a know giving us a passive income that probably our our savings make the money for us


alright yeah so so while while doing something for our, career our job uh our savings are working for us as well for our retirement, ya so investment is uh something that we we definitely have to look into even a simple fixed deposit or endowments uh with the insurance company ah that something anything that can easily make a two percent interest per annum is is uh will will be good


ya two percent because of the inflation rate lah that we want to fight off, uh yeah so yeah, I basically I


I I actually sign up quite a few ah insurance products like uh investment link plans and uh endowments so endowments are the more uh safer instruments uh at least I get are guaranteed amount that I I know that uh I'm


I won't lose everything lose all my money or you know I have a sum of guarantee amount plus uh some bonuses as what they called uh yeah dividends and bonuses along uh for the for the number of, years that I I I leave my money there


so uh this is something that I can see if my money working for me in the future for the future that when I can withdraw, for ah uh , in terms of uh, times that it of need, and then an investment planning