so ya lah, basically happier times, yeah literally no more energy anymore ya then how about you what memorable moments do you have


(mmhmm) (mmhmm)


(oo) okay okay, ya swimming ya swimming lessons when I was young was quite fun also, ya, pull y'all the sea which beach you all go like which beach and not


Sentosa right my gosh so is legit like just okay okay good for you sounds fun, experience lah okay


my main memory my most fond memory no matter what will be eating a lot of snacks when I was young okay now we can , , you will know , ya, okay okay next one talk about fond memories of a pet that you have or once had so mommy you can go first


you've kept, pets your like when you were young also what, [orh], ah okay okay understand understand okay so I will take this question so so now everyone here


who's watching this video listening to this audio will know that I'm a, crazy cat lover I'm number one fan of cats like I'm not even kidding I grew up having cats adopting strays you know like begging my parents to bring home another cat most of the time because it's just like oh my god look there's another stray let's just give it a home let just take care of it then my


parents will always be like !haiya! okay okay lah cause you know ya very nice to me , then yeah I just have very fond memories of my cats like most of the time like even when they scratch me then my whole arm has like claw marks you know from like every inch of my you know every inch of my arm and my friends will be like eh what happen


you you cut yourself I'm like uh no my cats scratch me then after that they'll be like oh my gosh why your cat like that I'm like she's cute you know that's his way of showing me love , but ya obviously I I don't yeah I never learn my lesson ya I don't feel that way anymore because my, current cat is an angel she is an angel she's so cute like she doesn't really scratch me I can like I can like disturb her when she's sleeping and like really like you know like carry her like a baby and just like hold her and she doesn't really like move she just like entertains me and just she's just the cutest thing ever and


I could literally talk for the remaining fifteen minutes about my cat or how much I love cats but, I will not do that , , I'll just put it out there that I love I love love love cats ,


no they're just gonna they're just gonna fast forward uh fast forward this part like okay this girl just gonna be talking about cats for like the next like don't know how many minutes, so sorry ya okay I'm done


not really morbid I feel like just your ultimate dreams [orh] your aspirations, then for you do you have anything, oh ya, yeah that sounds like something you will wanna do okay do you have anything else


goals oh okay, okay for me my new goal my new dream is to work with national geographic or history channel one of these like


media conglomerates that produce content about history environmental issues you know these current issues that we are facing and I don't wanna be be , I don't wanna like ya delve too much into this but uh basically in my four years of university I


I came to realize that I loved environmental history environmental science and learning more about environmental issues and even like creating ways or solutions like you know developing solutions within my group projects if we had assignments related to like uh sustainability like group projects to like you know


find a solution to a current or to tackle a current climate issue so this has been like my goal I guess since uh I started uni was like four years ago,


I don't have the stamina for that so that one maybe sometime in the future but uh for me it's really more like working, like working in the environment working in terms of like visiting you know uh historical cultural site learning more about that particular like location artifact et cetera you know and just yeah


I am a big history geek lah so uh , I I kinda hope to yeah in the future in the future ya Singapore is a bit tough to go into this kind of field I feel so yeah hopefully in the future lah ya so bottom line is I want to in an environmental field and I guess my other dream or goal is to travel


all over I love traveling I love seeing like nice sights so, I mean similar to you you wanna hike like all the mountains I wanna be in the mountain but I don't wanna hike up it I wanna just be like at the summit and be like oh !wow! so nice okay help me take a photo to put on instagram


that will be me , ya it's okay , , okay next question what do you love about life


why why you taking so long to answer this so difficult to think ah, yeah no ah, I'm asking you what do you love about life, deep very deep


okay for me what I wrote here is traveling and, food and chocolate , , uh okay okay I I'll say something deep now you know having the blessing of being of being alive okay that is my deep sentenced there okay done okay describe an experience when your faith in mankind is renewed


(mmhmm)


renewed okay okay , faith in mankind ah faith in mankind is a very very it's a very very loaded


ya but this is mankind like it's so big it's like it has to be something of a monumental scale for my faith in mankind to be renewed ya currently oh my gosh what can I think, of what


I think they are ya I really am, because if my because I feel like there are always little acts where like let's say my friends or strangers around me like they do a nice gesture or they uh you know say something nice so to me that's like okay my faith in


you know singaporeans are renewed it a way , ya ya, but this is man this is mankind this is mankind this is not just like Singapore so I need to like think properly I guess faith in mankind renewed would be like big


big big scale initiatives like black, political changes changes in legislation changes in uh governance ya so for me I come from the


you know with my environmental research so uh recently there was like the G G seven summit and greta thunberg you know I'm pretty sure you all you all have heard this name before basically greta thunberg gave a very like uh, eloquent and inspiring speech about how corporations and you know monopolies need to like


wake up and really check their their wastage in terms and and how they are contributing to global warming and the accelerated increase in global temperatures that, in the entire of history like the entirety of history has never experienced before it's unprecedented


global climate change so I feel that the response to that kind of summit was kind of renewed my faith, a bit in my kind a bit because I have seen like even in Singapore companies now they are actually taking sustainability seriously they're actually having more like eco friendly practices and is


some of it are surface level I would say but there are also some that are genuine and now they are like zero waste shops in Singapore as well so we can literally see this effect like, trickling down to different parts of the world not just american not just uh europe it's like even in in asia as well even in uh Vietnam uh Thailand there are now grocery stores where


they eliminate the use of single use plastic bags and it's hundred percent compostable and biodegradable like the materials they use for example is like banana leaves uh you know bio plastics I think in some cases and mostly, natural basically not natural natural ingredients and natural materials


so I think I'm just rambled on about this but basically yes yes basically that uh that uh G seven climate, uh talk summit the effects after that you know renewed my faith in mankind yes that was it okay moving okay ma you talk you talk


okay uh what is your your favourite childhood food or snack, oh, childhood food or snack your snack favourite childhood snack


my god what so boring , uh okay favourite childhood food ah I think my favourite childhood food will be, Prata ya, I think I like I like Prata now too but now I'm more into Teochew porridge I love porridge and my snack will be haw flakes I love eating haw flakes when I was a a kid


like I don't know why I will just eat so much haw flakes it just seem to be like everywhere and it was very it was very nice yeah it was yummy so I liked it okay next describe a moment when things turn out better than expected


, that sound so sad uh okay for me I feel like there's a lot of times that this has happened to me like uh times where I'm really at a critical situation and I'm panicking and I assume the worst is gonna happen but then after that it turns out like you know it's okay I was like


the worrying, for for for nothing you know yeah an example would be like uh recently I, passed some exams while being so afraid that I was gonna fail like two of them like I was so confident I was gonna failed two of them


then when I look at my results I was like I literally I felt so light I was like oh okay I pass I'm happy so yeah that's an example of you know things turning out better than I expected ya, okay next what is the nicest thing someone has ever told you


okay ya I think that you are ya, for me the nicest thing is , that I'm funny and I give great music and show recommendations yes it really it make me feel so happy because I take pride I take pride


in you know listening to good music and watching good shows yes so when people tell me that I'm like oh my god thank you thank you yes yes yes attack on titan yes, okay , , uh okay next describe a fond memory you share with your loved ones


(oo) ya, ya ya


it wasn't it it ya it was a it was pleasant traveling journey lah I would say pleasant ya not bad not bad okay for me I put eating good food together


, I was literally thinking about the times we go eat like ya always the food literally literally it's very important uh I was thinking about the times we will eat like uh chili crab, you know those seafood the seafood restaurant back when I could eat seafood ya and like going to jack's place to eat sometimes swensen's where sometimes at the places that I like


to eat also thai food ya basically revolving around food lah but I would say that Cameron Cameron is also a fond memory ya, ya #cameron highlands# was a nice place okay, talk about a time when you experienced personal growth


(mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


(mmhmm), different perspective as in like you felt you felt more like grateful for your life


(mmhmm),


okay that's interesting, I think for me would be personal growth like right off the bat I'm, I can only think of uh, being in university, and studying history that I felt was like my biggest personal change in a way like I just felt more like I felt like my third eye had opened and I just had a greater appreciation for like people in a sense especially like the elderly you know because


they are really like a testament to history and the struggles that they have gone through their choices that they have made has led up to where I am today me being here you know the butterfly effect like literally I will not be here if it wasn't for like a certain like you know a set of choices that were made by people in the past and


I felt like I never I never really like bothered about maybe like Singapore politics or , you know about like deeper cultural like theories or whatever until I went to to university and then I I was exposed to all of this and it just it just made me feel so much more like I felt like my EQ was boosted up like a few more levels you know ya and I felt that


, I I'm I'm glad yeah yeah yeah I'm glad that you you you think so because ya I do like to share I like talk about it cause it's so interesting to me I find it, so interesting and besides boosting my EQ I feel like also boosted uh


my level of like critical thinking and really not like cause you know what we learn in social studies and what I learned in university history is just very distinctly different ya so that's why I would say added to my personal growth


okay maybe can focus on a last question you can choose one question which one you wanna do, how about the uh describe your perfect day !huh!, ya perfect day (mmhmm)


, you sound like you're gonna start your ascension to heaven or something like legit like !wow!, I'm here thinking like okay that okay that really does sound like a perfect day lah mine is much more mine is much more simple and like boring my perfect day is you you should know ah you should know my perfect day is not moving from my bed


watching my shows eating my food all in my bed without me having to move kay that is my perfect day okay, , I think I think that is just nice , yes


okay I'm Vani okay okay for me


okay for me is I bought house when I was twenty plus twenty something also but was ten years ago at that point buying house was not really so difficult as how is it now, now it's like I find, before was like as long of both both couples working we can apply for loan and they I but that time I didn't took the parent grant because I didn't know much about it so I just bought a brand new flat and I get HDB grant because of our working we managed to get


certain amount loan and monthly I had to pay about, five hundred plus and I so it was still affordable so after that I had a I resold my, previous flat and I move in, I bought a second flat which is currently that I'm


living oh but when I bought ya but I, when I buy the second flat I realized that uh there were a lot of changes and it was not easy to get loan for the second time, because ya first, time they have a lot of grant but for second time not really


so my second time is like I somemore I was I only understand that we're only given HDB loan twice, so my , uh no I did not take bank loan I took HDB loan as I'm still eligible


{oh] ya but, I didn't know a lot of things when the second time when I took HDB loan I understand that, the loan that we take we, I mean whatever money we sell most of the money will go to your CPF account so I had, the cash that I had in my hand was really less which I was not aware


so it was very difficult but uh now I'm also planning after I mean I move this place about ten years I'm planning to buy a new flat, but I can't, buy because I've already third uh took two HDB loan, so for me to buy again a flat I have to take a, a


uh sorry bank loan so bank ya bank loan is really not easy to get they really check your all your history I mean records of your other personal loans so due to that it's very difficult to get and I find it's a bit funny that you shouldn't give us I mean as a singaporean we should get more privilege than just getting two two time to buy HDB flat


so and it's now like I really want to sell the house but due to this loan issues I can't I'm not it's not easy for me to get, and, once you've already I've not even use any grant which means those, parent grant all these thing but I've not used but for me to apply now I have to go through a bank loan


so I find it's not the right thing lah they should do something else, to help


uh yeah I I'm eligible to take I can get my parents grant but the loan that I have to apply from this to be from HDB uh sorry from bank, so that is the most I mean I can't apply a bank loan due to my uh because when I newly married I had to took take loans I'm still playing paying loans so all that issues those that I've outstanding loan so it's very hard for me to get a loan from bank now


cannot no it's only two time, so that's why I find it's not really like people like me I really need genuinely need to buy a house because of my children I will need to move my I mean my place somewhere near either my parents place on my inlaws


so it's very stuck I've already went to HDB I even appeal that I want to sell but HDB said if you really want to sell then if you have to go to a studio apartment, so ya it's not fully it's not


fully covered ya I'm still paying but, we have excess money in CPF which we can repay and settle off my current house so I find with that I don't know why is HDB not, giving us a loan they say first time we already get a grant I mean newly married there's only a grant so for


for for for me considered I'm a third timer second time also I did not take any grant I just, bought a normal resale but I didn't know much about, I mean I was very scared to take a bank, a bank loan for renovation because uh bank loan sorry for HDB because lot of people told me it's not safe


but honestly after years of living I realize it's HDB is more I mean bank, bank loan for housing is more safer than HDB because the interest is much lesser


ya the single auntie bought a scheme under the single grant because she's not married she's about fifty plus so when she bought okay that problem is she she bought a house to with the help of my husband's name that time my husband was not married, ya that, correct so now after he when we bought a house under his name she have to sell out the house but the sad thing she couldn't get a house for herself because she's single


so, yup uh that I mean those time law but now she's already sixty plus so she find it's like not easy to go to through this hassle so I find uh but actually I don't blame HDB sometimes is the people misuse it they just like a train everytime sell house sell house you know buy so that's why they have to bring this kind of law that you know HDB only per person can only buy two time


ya correct


you all did not appeal HDB to help for, you all


uh you all did not try for rental flat is it


but you all should have rent through HDB will even much cheaper, but it, I mean at this point I find HDB should help us right


but honestly I'm a a bit against this idea because my parents also had the same issue when they bought house that time it's like


you know older older days they don't really count all these how much they have so when my parents sold the house and bought a five room flat every month they used to pay very high monthly about thousand plus without them realizing they can't afford at this age so now my my dad is like already almost sixty plus seventy already so now he the CPF money has reduced


so he can't pay keep up to his previous loan, so he went to appeal to like reduce the amount HDB say no you have to sell off your house and my father said okay fine I will sell I want to downgrade to a three room flat but the government say no you can't buy a three room flat you can only buy a studio apartment


but but I really, but my father had enough CPF to buy


to fell off but they did not give because I mean the reason they give is their age but I find it's not fair it's like I mean where do these people go, ya


but you see I mean I mean being a parent I feel my house is my children's property I mean that's the only thing because in singapore it's not like those days we can, save up and give your children it's very little so for me my house is like anything happen to me and my husband this is for them so they can share the money among the three of them but


seeing all this new scheme new all those thing I don't know how will they future generation can cope up with this


but at the same time when we buy a house we're also paying for so called stamp fees which is about thousand plus which is really ridiculous is just two paper which is you know a stamp a signature for them to get and they're charging so much, I mean


uh I'm a AA executive, , [orh] ya there's another thing I need to share now just because I'm staying in a very big flat right for me to downgrade back I went and check for me to buy a four room flat I have to pay the I mean HDB a certain amount which is almost about twenty thousand


because I want a downgrade which is I don't know why should I pay that twenty thousand they say because from a bigger flat, correct it's some


ya so it uh it's they call it a levy the because I'm downgrading, so I find it's not the right thing I mean I'm downgrading why should I even pay you that, that money is not a small amount you know it's quite big I mean with that money I can do so many things I can even settle my loans all these thing


and even, correct so stamp loan stamp duties are also like way too much they're charging two thousand three thousand and it's a very simple work, so and the person what does that I mean we get a agent to do this and on top of it I also being agency fees and it's really too expensive I think the government should look into it you know try to help people like us


uh ya correct


but I understand it's we I mean I my husband we have already enough money of CPF so when I want to buy a new flat I can I can put a limit a deposit from my CPF uh a bigger amount, but there's a law say no only certain amount can be put so what about the rest of the money it's that our hard earned money what why I can't use that to buy a property


so when I ask them they can't answer me they say the law is such I mean which is a bit not fair for people like it's very frustrating I working so hard so where does the CPF money goes to, it's for me to buy a property and my house what I can't even do that then what is the purpose of the CPF


ya like I feel it's like honestly I feel very sad especially for my father who really went to you know he went through HDB for three to four uh for four years, just to get an appeal to approve until he settle his loan finish already so until when after everything settle that's when HDB come and told then you can buy another flat for what when I've already settle the house for him already


but he's struggled four years


your parents can't buy a flat because of the previous flat, but for how many years would the record be


but CPF uh I mean uh there's, there is another column called medisave what that when they are sick they can use that what but this CPF money, they (mmhmm) correct (mmhmm) okay okay (mmhmm) okay okay


then uh at the same time okay when you buy house they need to renovate for us to renovate you have to take a renovation loan and then it's another hassle they have to go through uh taking a bank loan getting a bank loan is not easy, (mmhmm) correct


okay for the first one I took a renovation loan, for the my first house I took a renovation loan and it was a bank loan for I think it was itachi ya it was a renovation company so okay we started paying and then after some time we had some difficulty paying because some family issues so after that we started you know we couldn't pay we couldn't so that particular record has shown us a very bad record


even till now I can't get a bank renovation to get a renovation loan, ya they expect us to have a very clear record which is not I mean honestly it's impossible due to the lifestyle we're living


I mean they I I find they should be a bit flexible like I really need to renovate my house but I can't renovate due to this kind of previous record so I can't apply any bank loan, !wah!, ya that's also quite high


so it's really not easy, ya that is the most difficult part you know you want to apply loan everything I really having a hard time my previous recorded


what age did you married your your age ya [orh] okay [orh] okay okay ya correct okay (mmhmm) [orh] oh okay I'm totally opposite ya [orh] okay (mmhmm) okay (mmhmm) oh that's quite sorry to hear that okay


you didn't even know you you were, pregnant ah oh okay oh okay okay (mmhmm) okay ah is their daughter (uh huh) (mmhmm) (mmhmm) what about your husband oh okay it's a okay okay [orh] suspicious lah (mmhmm) ya correct okay (mmhmm) correct


[orh] and it's very painful, (mmhmm) (mmhmm) [orh] okay correct I mean


ya it's not easy I can understand it's really not easy I mean I also went through this kind of situation but not abortion but you know in laws but I mean I really want to share the moment that I will never forget in my life is when my husband's aunty whom I really treat her like my mum she passed away due to cancer


so, the moment she diagnosed with cancer and the until she passed away I was all the way with her I was like going through with all that all going through with all the stages so it's very heartpain to see she really suffered a lot I'm, honestly very grateful to her she has


taken care of my baby whenever I'm work she's the one who took care of my children everything so when she first diagnose with uh cancer it was the I mean we couldn't accept and we don't know how to deal with it and the worst part doctor said she can only live for three months, that was, I know she's going to die within three months it was very painful so it's like


was a very how to say the the past, three that particular three months was like a hell to me, it's like, you know everyday after uh there's no like I was like meaningless I can't even cope I became worry how am I going to live without her how am I going to cope, because I honestly I don't know how to take care of my children at that point she was like my mother who does everything


so financially I'm even uh taking care of my children everything was done by her, I I mean I once she's not there I have to take care of the children the caregiving arrangement, looking for all these like question mark around me, me and, if she's no more how am I going to live without her and


she's suffering in pain when she tell me I'm like so helpless I will just like I will just go to toilet and cry because I don't know how to help her with she's like in pain she'll be screaming, and I took care of her I spend with her the for the last I took two weeks no pay leave, I was with her taking care of her it was very hard to see you know like the way she's going through in pain like I find a person shouldn't die suffering like that I'll always pray that I rather die in my sleep or you know accident come I just die on the spot that suffering you know you going to die three months so for the next three months you have to suffer you know sleep and wake up are you going to be alive


it was a terrible way of leaving I feel and, it's very hard for that it's like a moment in my life I'll never whenever I think that it's like that's that's why I realize you should appreciate, you know the loved ones like whoever you love you really learn to appreciate so like that kind it's very sad to see


it's a very I will never forget that particular treatment it was very negative my whole life was like nothing was positive was very very negative like, I couldn't cope with my life I couldn't and a lot of misunderstandings with my own family and then I, with my children like I came to the point I feel like giving up them and you know running away


because like, very it's like it's like everyday you wake up like nothing is positive, everytime you know whenever I go to hospital all negative doctor will say oh you know it's very bad the condition she's going to you know like she's like very long call all your relative like it was very hard so it's not a easy uh I mean uh I especially this uh as it happened in september so every year september when it comes it's like !wah! very heart pain


yea, uh ya she was like there for me whenever I really need, so one of the I mean a horrible experience in my life ah, I never want to like I think of the good moments but the but the negative part I like that experience like !wah! really a heartpain


(mmhmm) ya correct ya you pay for someone oh ya correct (mmhmm) [orh] okay okay okay ah okay


oh you did not write down anywhere, is it okay okay (mmhmm) oh it's for you ah (uh huh) okay oh okay (uh huh) okay ya okay (mmhmm) okay okay okay oh that's quite a terrible (mmhmm) oh (mmhmm) !wow! ya I mean you it's not okay (mmhmm) okay (mmhmm)


[orh] !wah! it's not easy I mean okay I mean


uh I was being backstabbed by a best friend, uh it was a very terrible uh backstab by her I treat her like my own sister, uh I mean she was everything to me so too close with her even till today I can't get over it I I it's very emo like no one understand the pain they said I mean you know she's like that just move on it's very easy to say but


the pain is, I had a pain became a anger so it's like, uh you know I I really, too close with her like share with her everything it's a must morning I wake up after you know I shower when I'm my on my way to work it's a must to call and talk to her I I will say I had so much of love you know like she was everything to me so


but I didn't know she was like talking about me badly to other people gossiping about me all these thing so when I, it was when I get to know it'd be happening for four almost ten years, so but she has been I know she talks about me but I never take it too personal like I mean


because that much I liked her, uh that kind I was very true to her but lately became was so ugly that she talked about me terribly which I can't even accept when I confront her the reason I confront her it's better to clear things out than you know than talking about you behind, then she say ya I talk about you what is that what's so great about you


it I really break down because, because I trusted you, and you were not true to me and what hit me most that I was a fool for the past ten years, thinking that she was true to me, and it was really very painful that even now even till today, today I still cry because


the pain I have is like, like you know you trust someone for ten years and then the, person easily say ya, and that whatever you share with her the person immediately gossip about you everything to others I shared with her a lot of personal thing I mean, personal thing as in my personal life with her like my things within my husband I share with her she was like a best friend a


sister a mother everything now that, !wah! it now if I see her I even uh the anger is still there I can't even forgive, her like, to be honest if anything even she passed away or anything I will never even want to step to her funeral that kind of anger I have I I can't say that it may sound like


even I I shared this with my mother or sis uh sister or even my husband they say why must think until like that I say ya because I'm in the pain no one understand when you are in my shoes then you know how painful it is, ya backstab is something I will never forgive, because people trust ya ya but


ya betrayer is really like you trust them and then you it's very hard I don't know how they can talk to you everything uh like normal but behind they talk about you so badly, and they never understand how it feels the other person will trust you, it's something until now I can't get over it, it's very painful


have you had any backstab by anyone, oh that's one ah people never want to hear good things one, I think you must be like the person who stab me right she always go the with you I didn't know is like


just you know, this kind of bad things the people really appreciate when you say good things to them they will never appreciate that I realized that, ya but at the same


at the same time you must also know how to deal with it I I had of the issue of dealing I became I became depressed I started to cry and then like, I started to even harm myself because I feel that the pain is that I become a fool I can't accept that she would treat me like a fool so I couldn't handle that I be I started to show the anger to everyone


then slowly I realize it's very wrong to punish people who are not even involved, so I realize it took me it took me years to realize that no point forgiving I mean no point blaming others it's your own mistake so that's when I learn and move on it took me years to move on


correct it's not easy ah I mean it was a for a lesson a eye opener to realize what is a you know all these thing, like even to me when I being backstabbed I realized never trust anyone, easily even, any little also I'll think twice shall I tell them or not it's vey hard to trust anyone really it's very difficult


that one lesson until now I can't trust anyone even my own husband to be honest I I don't trust him hundred percent because, uh I don't know who to trust ya, I can't overcome that I that particular experience like making me even anyone I talk eh what if they end up to be like the person who


backstab me so, it's very difficult it happened about three to four years I have not even totally recovered from that yet, ya is it done uh so


I mean ya I always tell my I you know the best part I always see the person who betray me, I I she happens to be a family member lah but I always see her, so whenever see her the anger gets worse I feel even slapping her you know like really hitting her the anger is the betrayal be I mean the the hurtness had became a anger


I see her also I tend to stare at her like I even why am I so childish behaving like a secondary school girl, or you, I'm trying to move on it's it's very difficult that negative thing is like even till now sitting on my head when I'm bathing and all I will think of her !wah! she backstab me until like that you know it's very very bad but I know I can't move on I'm trying to but I'm not giving up definitely one day I'll move on I know


okay, okay hi I'm Vani okay small things that make me smile is when I come back from you know after a tired day from a work I come back home it's it's very tiring honestly then I've to come and cook for my children before I cook like !aiya! so tired but end of the day after I cooked when the children eat that smile that I see of the face !aww! I tell you is like that thing make me like really happy


this kind of small things make me very very happy so, see when I say already I'm so excited, for this small I mean sacrificial that I did for them is really it's worth ah, what about yourself uh ya ya correct okay (mmhmm)


ya I think that's the most important thing, ya correct (mmhmm)


okay positive okay I'm also having my grandmother stay with us so I mean having parents as I mean if you see nowadays kids are not really close with parents like before, but so if I'm being close with my parents now is like really a very good experience for me, ya they learn from me correct


ya actually what I another I have to say what I love about myself is that I don't give up things easily, uh so it's like lot of times I I tell myself I want to give up all these things but I always tell myself that, I shouldn't give up so when end of the day when I do something finish then I realized !wah! not bad like


I pull through this, so that is something that I really love about myself, oh correct we


correct that was really really I really had a good time, and then okay the best meal I ate uh you won't believe is just and there was a point to share I didn't have any money with me, it was like really broke so it's like you know we just bought the basic rice and then we cook a soup and then we fry #ikan bilis# and then I and husband we were just having and like I realize we were like


it's a very simple meal but we really enjoyed that meal, correct eh it's not (mmhmm) ya ya all these is like


ya that's really a very good experience lah I mean no that was a very short just two weeks but I tell you it was really we had a quality time, and we like have some some time for ourself ya


ya I agree I mean, even during the circuit breaker then before that I and husband we we live in the same house we hardly see because of working, by the time he come back I'm too tired I sleep so morning when I both of us like we don't even get to see but during this circuit breaker was like we had a family bonding


I miss the circuit breaker to be honest like initially starting stage I didn't like it like to be at home all the way but after when it's over it's like !wow! I miss that quality time when we had together you know you cook and come you eat with your family all of us are like we sit down and eat together we we because that that point you can't even go out


so end up you are just within your five that I mean myself with with the five of us only at home, it was really a quality time, (mmhmm) okay okay ya correct correct correct quality time ah okay ya actually we are I


what you say is true I came to realize like really like because before that you know after work I come back even my children don't understand that it's very tiring for me they find that you're just going to work what what am I doing for the working mother it's very tiring, and then I come from work it's like I've to rush back home just to cook because my kids need to eat


so it's like sometimes even come I don't even take shower you know because it's like really you know I I got three kids so the I come back home I don't even have a good rest so I immediately go and cook once I cook and come you know when I give food so they didn't realize that nothing what you're just cooking you like my children used to say very easy what cooking what's so difficult but during the circuit breaker they realized !wah! not easy ah because


to you to what do you cook you have to plan your meal then those marketing you have to buy so when I was like during the circuit breaker my husband and my kids realize, so after that when we stepped back to normal life now, each of us like doing different duties like for me I cook, my daughter help me to fold clothes


to heat up food all these thing whereas my two boys help me to iron, then my husband is like we share the duties he, mops the house sweep the house so it's like that circuit breaker really changed a lot of things, oh okay okay (mmhmm) ya as


correct during this circuit breaker I also did exercise I mean I used to love I love to go jogging but I during uh uh this circuit breaker I dare not go out you see so at home ya do simple exercise with my daughter but the good thing during this circuit breaker my husband gain weight, because, he had never had good time good meal you know during working days but during the circuit breaker he was at home only so he really gain a lot of weight


ya ya


ya actually it's not only I really find that we're like we're very united at the point regardless what race are people like we're very united whenever like whenever I go down you know my neighbours always tell me take care ah be careful, so that then I can see the care and concern that's why I feel so proud to be singaporean like


when your neighbours you know the interaction we have with them during the circuit breaker was different


oh ya tell me I was busy baking cake all those Kuehs like ah where were these hidden talents came from like I really ah now you ask me I got no time to even go to the kitchen to do anything, so ya ya correct correct so ya


ya honestly when they say that the circuit breaker open we can go back to work you won't believe I cried that night because there was too emo like I my husband say why you want to cry I really cried very badly because I can't, bring myself to go back to work, I like, you know was like for the past two months staying together with them I I kind of going to miss them especially my children and then my husband like like was a very heartpain


I went to work I can't even work like I was just praying oh the circuit breaker extend, ah (uh huh) okay okay okay ya ya


correct during that part I really laugh a lot I really had a good time you know like previously before we were working we were so stressed like we tend to show face especially I mean talking with my husband lah we tend to show face there was no much of communication but during the circuit breaker I tell you both of us like really laugh we were enjoying watching all this netflix movie horror movie we will sleep as late as two three AM


because there was no day nothing to when you wake up in the morning you're still at home only you see so it was a very good experience, oh correct correct ya ya agree


ya when actually correct when I heard about the during the circuit breaker the divorce rate was very high I was eh why must be it be high, I mean that's the time you know the bonding but when it happen to my own family one of my cousin she is that point when after the circuit breaker when I met her she say she divorced I was like very shocked because before that they were very loving you know like it was like eh are you sure then she say ya so I realized [orh] during circuit breaker you tend to know the true character of each other


it was like correct ya


you mean they celebrated, oh in singapore [orh] okay okay okay oh quite interesting


ya correct actually it was really a eye opener like you see we are working so much and all those like you earn so much but end of the day you're not happy you're, too tired to even have a you know even to smile at each other you're too tired but during the circuit breaker I realise that there are things more than money


you you know family bonding that quality time so I really learn a lot I make it a point that every weekend it have to be a family time, ya correct


and then okay the thing that I missed most during the circuit breaker I love to go beach, I mean it's a kind of relaxation ah so that's a place I love to go to visit, what about you Hema where do you like to go, but if a normal place where do you like to visit


okay uh okay okay okay oh okay (uh huh) okay I oh


for me is like honestly I don't like swimming because I hate to get wet and then that is the main reason so my husband love to go beach I didn't I don't like I don't like what you don't I don't even admire anything what to it's like hot sun why do I need to go there but slowly when I go there like I find that calm you know very relax


the way you see the beach the air all these are really relax I really have a good time relax myself, ya okay ya correct (uh huh) okay [orh] true okay oh that's a good sign [orh] okay oh okay okay ah ya ah ya june


it is a good ah four months, cut down ah okay, I think he himself can see the changes over right


(mmhmm) correct ya, I mean I also understand they want to relax they drink but, we are a bit concern is for the health you see


, it it's a habit already, okay correct


oh okay that eh that's good okay ya correct till my, but a sad thing about circuit breaker is that I can't go and visit my family my grandmother my parents so that is the sad part about circuit breaker because I like to go out you see I don't like to stay put at house so that is a bit I miss that that too much I miss that a lot I love to I couldn't meet up like my sister's birthday came we couldn't have any gathering that


ya actually was really a correct correct ya we had a different experience about cutting cake you know online it was like eh what is this something new like you know actually my parents like eh can we even do like this so was very fun actually we ya


ah ya correct correct


ya I mean end of the day we must love to enjoy our I mean appreciate what you have and really enjoy every moment of your life you never know what's going to happen I realize that


correct I even teach my children learn to I mean we should learn to appreciate every small thing there's like immediately when when I know something is very good learn to appreciate that I told them, ya


correct there's no correct really have a good I mean no time no regrets at all, ya okay, I cannot


okay speaking about property loan and stamp, this I'm Hema, okay uh I just I just want to share with you that my experience because I got uh married and then I bought my house when I was uh twenty one twenty twenty three years old


at that period of time I was working so when I buy uh HDB with my husband this is my my part of story lah ah, when I buy the HDB with my husband we in order to buy we need to take a loan because in singapore we like getting a home ownership we can't afford to buy houses because they are over two hundred over thousand


so because of our own, , like my earning and his earning so we were able to take uh, , loan is called HDB grant lah actually so like for me first time buyer we have HDB grant uh, parents grant if we buy nearer so I got parents grant and then first time


buyer grant, so having all these grant then we managed to buy a house, so at that period when I was really working then we get to buy the house then uh the balance we paid was very less that means every month we have to pay it from our, CPF


so our total was about seven eighty from the CPF like from mine and from his, so it was like going on like that then even my friends also were sharing that uh, because of the HDB grant they will manage to, get a house because in, singapore definitely our generation


people like, with previous generation it's easier but for our generation it's, impossible without a grant, grant or, the amount of CPF we have we cannot buy a flat, so what happened was as time goes on I start I lost my job


so I have a grant I have to pay every month seven hundred plus, so after I lose my job it took, me over one year to get another job, so in between those period, the money started to rise up so we started, to seek HDB again for help


because we can't pay, so somehow it accumulated and become a arrears so we had a lot of arrears to pay but, still somehow HDB helped us as in like they don't just let us go like that so what happened from seven hundred and eighty over, dollars we started to pay one thousand one hundred and fifty three dollars


this has to be either by cash or this has, to be either by CPF, but I did not have a job so started to work as cash pay then we start, started to accumulate, my money cash money and his CPF then we started to pay one thousand one hundred and fifty


weekly until we get a job, until I got a job, then I also started to pay that amount still paying until today, because the arrears so once the arrears is being settled, then HDB will allow us to pay our normal seven hundred eighty dollars


every month, so our generation people we badly really need the grants how about you what was your, your story during your time, which age you got married and you bought a house


oh ya this is your second flat right, ya I know second buyer, alright [orh]


so did you take bank loan for your second house, [orh] still eligible second time okay okay (mmhmm) okay ya lor correct okay ya that's why okay


okay let's say now let's say now you are getting another flat okay just put it, because you haven't touched on parents grant right, but new new buyer grant you you touched right so parents grant if, you get a new house another house now


your parents grant you still can, you can you're eligible to take your parents grant


[orh] okay that means now you, but now if third time buyer can still take HDB grant, no right uh only bank, children okay


uh [orh] studio apartment impossible, like my my case right like if let's say because initially they asked whether if I can't afford to pay should do I want to downgrade


but in order for me to downgrade to three because I don't have a child what it's just me and my husband, for me to downgrade, I still cannot downgrade because I've to cover all my arrears, then only you can downgrade so that period no matter what die die have to pay the one thousand one hundred and fifty three dollars


cannot cover so use your HDB got more your like for me the loan I still have lah, hundred thousand plus I have how about yours yours not fully covered right, still paying CPF two of you


, ya


how about your auntie remember once you told me your auntie the the single auntie, she bought a house,


[orh] must have two names is it, must have two names okay, why cannot single cannot have only one ownership must have two names


[orh],


two house ya because the last I know that period when my mother was telling those period a lot of buying and then selling sell very fast because, when they really need, hard for cash right the only thing, they have is for is their house to sell they cannot sell


ya they cannot there's no other way for cash like my parents, they didn't had, any choice they couldn't pay for their house I was not married, I was about uh sixteen years old, my parents bought house for many years they couldn't pay because my father had an accident, they couldn't pay anything for the house


so uh, there was a worst case, scenario that we had really had to leave leave the house because really die die cannot there's too much already, no can a lot but we do not blame actually we cannot solely blame HDB because sometime the fault also lies in us


so we, they really cannot pay theirs the arrears is not like mine, like their period their arrears was way much so we have to they have to sell the entire house so that point of time we were homeless, ya we didn't had a house because we really had to sell it was too high


no no we tried for rental flat but like, after a year because when HD, HDB sell right they're giving you the money, so they believe that when we have that money we're able to rent, the flats we did rent for six months private like paying thousand three dollars, thousand three hundred every month no cannot because the number of us even though we're single not married total of us is five and


that period my sister was a single, mother so she stayed with us so that period, no at that period they will not help because it's very common anyone that sells your house you're holding a lot of cash right, you're not allowed you're not entitled for a rental flat after five years my parents got a rental flat after five years studio apartment correct ya that's the rule


because they feel if let because the the higher the let's say two room three room is higher right, what they're afraid of is that, they can't pay like, their age their job, the amount of CPF okay


but for this new you know right there's a new scheme for, for older people, the loan of their house that means they can HDB will take over your house, that means after you, it doesn't goes to the children after they passed away it doesn't go to the children but


every month they will give you thousand dollars for you to use that as an expenses but they take your house but, for for what I know many old people now like my, aunties or other people, they are doing this because they can't work and earn so much money, so they do this


ya I know in fact now already it's very hard like for me I'm waiting for my arrears to finish after my arrears finish I don't think as a married couple with no kids I don't think, that I need a four room flat so for me I will downgrade to a three room so, my house money I can actually cover up for a three room flat


then I don't have to pay so much stamp fee alright yes true


I agree but I want to ask you something ah, let's say now you're in a you're in a five room flat right, executive okay then let's say now next, you can downgrade but you can still stay on the you can still find another executive, flat


is it like a GST I, because my father now just did that from a four room flat, flat they went to a BTO, so they had to pay so called like a GST, which is about ya correct correct


levy ah levy levy correct correct, levy ya renovation agent fee ya


actually H HDB if let's say you didn't you, if you never take uh agent right actually HDB will like for me when I buy a house I had a agent like but for my friend she get a house, uh she didn't go through, it oh sorry sorry that's selling, when she sell her house she didn't go through agent she directly sell to


HDB so from, people buying outsiders buying your house and HDB buying your house there's a lot of, difference, like whatever HDB offer you have to, take it am I right whatever HDB offer


it it's a lot lah but so I'm very sure that your children or other children when they grow right, theirs will really be a bomb my


my parents cannot buy flat they're under HDB, HDB uh rental scheme but they cannot buy a flat if they want to buy a flat they only can get a studio apartment, or if my brother who is single and he he buy a flat my, my parents one of them either can be a second owner


yes because they didn't pay their arrears for very long as in theirs is really really very huge amount, the I'm, not so sure about the record but like for now when she went to HDB they advise her that you can stay in a rental flat you can buy a


studio apartment, but that has to be like fully in, in uh cash because, fully from their CPF cash because they cannot, use, because they are old you cannot expect them what, if they're sick and then they don't have a job then they got no CPF, you can't deduct any CPF money from their from for them as in like that no


no no no medisave is for, correct sickness but, CPF you know there's two account right special account and ordinary, one of that they use for housing, if let's say they don't have a job, how will the contribution be so they cannot nowadays they don't let let this older generation buy three room flat four room flat it's a studio apartment and the studio apartment price is actually very very low


so a lot of them they can afford it through like one time cut off from their CP, CPF because I heard one of the relatives also like that, as in like they sold their house they went to cambodia so now they come back they want to buy a house right, they are allow allowed to buy a studio flat which is cheaper and more manageable for them


as in like no loan definitely this one got no, bank loan ya, I'm not so sure about the information but, it's something like that renovation loan


ya not everyone can take a like my time my period when I want to renovate my house right, there was no such thing as renovation loan because we can't, I'm jobless, he was working, they will see the combined salary right, so we didn't had so there's can't take any renovation


loan it was my father in law who actually helped us cash, very minimal uh renovation yourself uh yourself ya


that's true once there's is a mark there's always a mark the loan part they're quite strict actually in singapore I feel bank loan renovation loan they are quite strict, actually ya ya


no the interest the thing that kills is the interest interest of the, loan ya ya and then, knowing the salary like joint salary thinking that it's actually a lot then they will you have to tend to have to fork out more I know okay it's true okay let's stop anyway


okay we're going to talk about I'm Hemi I'm going, talk about negative experience in my life okay actually when I was I got married actually I got married at a very young age I was not so interested to get married at that period because my friends all were like


was career minded they still enjoying their their lives, sorry when I got married twenty three, so my friends all like career minded, and then


they had uh they enjoyed life they go for holidays but the reason why I got married was because of my mother in law because her first son got married when he was, twenty eight so she expects her second son also to get married when he was twenty eight, so at that period of time my parents were very giving in so they said it's okay even after you married you still can be happy and all so I the very typical older singaporeans thinking


so I got married when I was twenty three, uh I supposed to buy a house at the period but my mother in law somehow she spoke to me to say uh uh my elder son already married and went off so I can't bear for my second son to leave so can you stay with us for a while until we get a flat


flat but it then, knowing me lah very emo so I agreed to it so I started to stay there everything was fine and then, that period of time small small little picky things lah very very typical thing so


like I follow my mother's culture my mother always say if uh anyone speaks badly or say anything go in one ear come out another ear so I'm not the argumentative person, ya so it's like that so I'm like that so whatever they say or they do I just have to nod the head so there there's a period really came and I had really


my stomach was very pain it was my first I married first year Deepavali, so the same thing lah one and only daughter in law in the house so the all the housework has to be done by me climbing up of the kitchen cabinet wiping everything is to be done by


me so when I was doing uh all these uh my tummy was very painful, so I didn't know why so when I went to the toilet there was lot of blood my thinking was menstruating women you know, but it was not actually it was uh it was a fetus, that means uh uh I had a miscarriage at that period


ya ya but I didn't know so uh I just took picture of it and then uh, I explained to my husband it was very painful so we started to go to SGH see doctor, no no I didn't know, because I climb up then like you wipe the cabinet finish I jump down rinse the cloth climb up wipe jump down like that so didn't know what so uh ya because I was the only one to to do that because I have a sister in law she's at she's uh my age


but she's not a person who do housework, but I cannot pick on her correct it's her choice so I, went to see a doctor then they did a test and everything and then they told me that I was actually uh, pregnant but then uh, it's a miscarriage but she say it's a common thing


uh for newly married couples but for my case she asked me what is the worst thing you did I say jumping down from the cabinet while cleaning so that's one of the cause so when I after seeing doctor but I still never take it very I mean sad is sad lah but never take it too serious because she say it's very uh


uh common among, women who are newly married so after finish I when I came back home right normally you will want a support right because I haven't shared with my, family yet so normally we want is a support so when I came home there was no support they actually uh


they judge no my husband is always supportive but when I because I living with the family right so when I came home there was no support like, uh are you sure you was pregnant cannot be, maybe you got menses problem, you always have menses problem so it's like that then my sister in law was at my age so I used to share with her like she just peep and say are you okay I say fine so I was on bed for few days because it's really very painful


painful, so my mother in law started to be a bit naggy lah how long you're going to lie down it's just a menses problem I say it's not a menses it's it's a miscarriage so when they suspected, that's the word right ya they suspected


like they judge like suspect are you sure she's pregnant so it was it became my suspicious uh it became a, problem, so my husband started to ask that, during her bad time if she's telling she's in pain she's miscarriage and all you can't even believe her then tomorrow if she's pregnant


and if she come to you and say she's pregnant, why would you want to believe her you cannot take someone's, negativity then how can you take someone's positivity so time went like that and then what how old am I today thirty three is I married for eleven years so after that we also did it's it's just became like that lah


I don't I didn't had a child so that that actually the thinking always haunt me like what if I didn't jump down from the cabinet at that, period of time maybe my child would have been eleven years old today, today right, would been have been eleven years old today but until today they don't feel bad so it was about like last year when my mother in law was asking that it's already ten years which is last year


why didn't you try for a child, so I just said it's okay lah just leave it to to you know to science to god if I'm pregnant is pregnant, so uh then, my husband said that she was pregnant once so she's asked me, when did you get pregnant so we were like telling so


we were telling that I already went through so much you didn't know ah she said no I don't remember, such episode then my sister in law who is in my age okay mother in law maybe she forget sister in law whose my age even she said I don't remember you having a miscarriage


so for me right, I always have this thinking my parents didn't give birth to me in order for you, to hurt me like that , like whatever you need I help but whatever I need I don't need money help or financial help or anything but a support is never there from my husband's family even today


the very typical mind


because she was a


great pillar for you right I remember, ya so I know I remember the time like uh


okay you know right when they do something against the law, then you get handcuff you go but I've, never done anything against the law but I was being handcuffed once, uh you know what is , bailer, as in like some okay my husband have a


ya my husband has a lot of , fines HDB fines because lorry in singapore there's not much of, place for lorry parkers to park here and there you know very well under block you cannot park ya only multi storey carpark so he didn't get a season parking for the multi storey car park


eh not multi storey carpark uh loading uh heavy vehicle parking so he started to park randomly outside industrial parks so he get a lot of fines so he accumulated until it was, ten over thousand


ya eighty eighty times like that but, it's also his mistake because he was ignorant about it then after that, that uh we the letter came like uh, Vijayendran attend to the police station and sign all this kind of the thing warrant of arrest so I went with him so I sign as the bailer I


I really didn't know how it works I thought I sign as a bailer so we must I must make sure that he goes to the court on that day, so, every time we will go to the court all the time but this one time because of my medical appointment we forgot about the date


so we, never because we always will go the confidence so I did we did not go so the letter came for me as a bailer I failed to bring him to the court so that court date I have to attend, so when I


I will attend I didn't know I thought must pay fine, I went I was I stood centre of the court because I really didn't know in singapore a bailer by not uh bringing the other party to the court is a big offense


, so I I was I was stuck there I was not supposed to go anywhere so I turn and look at my husband I have to pay a six hundred dollars cash immediately so he went out to arrange for the cash but, waiting for the cash they brought me inside I didn't know that there's a jail below the courtroom which everybody should everybody know lah they say everyone know but I didn't know so they brought me inside then the police officers handcuffed me


I had asthma attack actually because I was shocked, I did like I feel that I've never done anything against the law, but you know so they handcuffed me they brought me down and that's how I get to see how actually a jail cell looks like they they removed my hair clip my SIM card the phone SIM card


they strip you then when you're stripped you have to squat they check you it's really very embarrassing until today I cannot get over it then I went in there were other girls they were actually very normal those are like can be drug addicts or what there was one caucasian girl she don't belong to singapore but she did something against the law


so I went in then they serve me food then they had to urine we if you want to pass urine or shit it has to be in front each other, so I just sit there and then one of the officers the police officer she knows what I came in for so she actually told me to like uh I pass you the phone there's a phone that you can actually call so I tried calling my husband


and trying to tell him that , uh have you arrange for the money but he was actually crying to me that he felt sorry, that when I I, because ah by four o'clock if you never pay the money, the six hundred dollars they will bring me to remand centre and you go to remand centre you have to stay for one week


you cannot come out that's Changi remand centre, so if you don't pay by four o'clock I will go there, so it was already three forty, so my heart was beating very fast because I don't see why I need to go through this, I didn't know the severity of uh of a bailer


so ya she keep she came back again and say can you please call again and check where is your husband again I asked he said ya I'm queuing here to pay the money, so I came out then the police made me sign put the SIM card back they handcuffed me they bring me up so what happened was I climbed up the court


the old court right there's a twirling staircase down to the basement car park so they will release you from the basement car park, but she brought me up the staircase I was very embarrassed you know why because upstairs there will other indian people malay people sitting down to waiting for their turn


so I I actually really pleaded with her I say can you please remove the handcuff now don't bring me up and remove, but she was nice enough lah she removed there then I went, I think about three days I had, the grip mark


of the handcuffs on my wrist, ya


ya I know betrayal the betrayal feeling they always say you can forgive your enemy but you can never forgive a betrayer, ya I know it's not easy


I have my own siblings like for the past one year they've never spoken to me, just ya I share with you before all because I just said good, things ya ya


actually negativity I have a lot in my life but I always believed that, you go through a negative things is because something positive is coming, so there's too much actually I have a lot actually, my siblings then the court


actually pain is you can actually forgive but you cannot forget words I know I really get like you see things things change things move on already pay the fine everything settled but, my to me it's a loss I'm always a girl who follow law but, that's why I can't accept that I'm being handcuffed just I didn't know the consequences of a bailer so I still cannot accept


trust issue,


it takes time lah I know betrayer


ya but actually you cannot continue because when you have children and they're watching over you ah so they will take the negativity is like a positive thing for them right so I know trying to ya move on it's not easy


okay we're going to talk about positive experience so , you want to start first


actually for me my positive experience is my in my life was honestly my husband because the, one and only guy that I met like you know schooling days everybody have so many boyfriends ya like for me I don't I'm not I'm not really like that not not say not I would love to but didn't get the chance so for me the positive experience is uh Vijay Vijay is my husband


like from the time let's say now we don't even have a child or all these but it's not, something which we think is negative but we, feel that even though there's not we're still like like friends best friends even though we like, ya


like even though there's so many other problems, uh we're not bothered about that it's just positive lah just that what you say your kids is your happiness because, I know you got share with me personally many times that whenever you go back home you're positive, positiveness, like such thing as like uh when they do good they help you out with your housework they help you out with your cooking so these are the things actually so ya


how about like let's say you will stay with your parents you haven't get married right, what is your positive experience in your with your family


ya the children will actually see because I remember you told me many times that your children actually really look up to you to, to behave how to, older people and all like how she support, like how she supports your mother remember we were talking about it I think yesterday she supports


remember the weight loss program that we went, F forty five ah, that one is really a positive one because I remembered how we went we, one day our legs all were very sore but then everyday we go with full speed, and then the coach


the coach I mean two coach I mean I've only met two coach both the coach were really very nice to us


ya I know because we we know there's many other people who suffering also but, as long we have a shelter actually if you ask me like having a shelter really is a very good thing


ya, that's why I really like our F forty five the exercise that we went right, I find it even though like overweight and all that got so many thoughts and all but something keeps us going is because of the way the, what's his name ah the coach I can't remember his name


but the coach that makes us go everyday like even after every we've finished even though after that we still go and eat ban mian or any other thing but still the the


but we didn't stop there what like everyday we still do meet up we go for exercises actually what what makes this thing good was the circuit breaker I will mention the circuit breaker in singapore circuit breaker actually opens up many people's eyes in the view of exercise you agree


I share with you something ah circuit breaker was about two months in singapore so that that because my my neighbours are chinese they're very friendly so we went uh, I like always water the plant right so uh she was sharing with me because uh uncle is uh working in the construction site and she is working in the bank and then one of her son is going to the army


and then her daughter is studying in the university, so circuit breaker period she was telling me that the, uncle had, because construction site there's nothing there to go to do right so uh he was having a very bad health condition, so circuit breaker period


she told me that few things happen good to the family first was their health, he lost weight during circuit breaker I think he lost about seven KG cause he went for walking with the wife, secondly like as female to female talks uh she was telling me that everytime let's say if husband is busy normally we girls we find our own lifestyle or own life with our friends but during circuit breaker period she had a lot of time with her husband


that means ya he uh he understand that as a working wife how she go through managing her work coming home and managing the house things so he took up the responsibility and he shared with his


two children about because she always tell me that the two children are very quiet they do their own things in their room so she was telling me after circuit breaker period happens everything changed in their family, ya everyone start to do


ya I I hear this story everywhere even now I go to work when I was working in the dormitory like the COVID period you know they have to bring people to the dormitory to work I was one of them so the family all same I had a friend uh he's young way much younger than me he's schooling, he said the same thing in his life he's only he's only eaten all the cakes and bread baked by his mother


but now he said that he baked the cake and then he, the bread and all now his family is eating that so, not only me or you or my even my neighbours even like my downstairs neighbour also the uncle who has uh dementia even his daughter feels that uh she has more time spending with her


father during the circuit breaker a lot of people lah that's why now you see ah even the circuit breaker is over is phase one phase two you still see people exercising jogging at the park, they still ya and


happiness lah because even eating out now because since it's just five five you're eating out right so the uh very good, I I don't know whether I'm right but I feel like that many families what they take as they start to eat and plan their meals in the house so when they plan their meals in the house they have longer chat time


time longer, that's why I I decided to choose to talk about circuit breaker because of this actually I learn a lot a lot even in the hospital even in the dormitories some of the workers they mentioned that they don't even though they're stuck there but they don't have the time to go back to their country and all but they have a lot of time video calling their family


then they get to know, that what problems they are facing there it's a lot lah actually, I'm sure you


I know it was during it was uh #hari raya# period I don't know but the sheng siong that I went to you, you can hardly find any flours because everyone was doing Kueh I know I was


ya the fact now when you start back your daily life routine it change but it was really a very good experience but I know to me it changes many people's mindset and thinking like like you say your husband even my husband a person who doesn't cook but now starts to cook so circuit breaker is like a training ground so now even if we go if I go to work when I come back he cooks


or he goes to work he come back I cook so I feel that it takes because I know you remember you share with me some things then my friends also share so this is what is happening now during that period even the children also their mindset all change, they know how to that's why I


true I also agree lah even my sister also she my a sister who doesn't cook my sister who doesn't cook for her children, for years as in like everyday they eat outside food Maggi Mee like that right so a sister who doesn't cook for her children during circuit breaker she cooks every day for her kids so she taught her son how to cook so now at this period when the mother is she's she went to work she go to work right


he start to cook like simple simple fried rice, rice, so as a mother she will feel, feel it and as a son he will feel it ya so this, I feel circuit breaker is the best time even though it's like COVID but circuit breaker is the best opener for


everybody


(ppc) even though they said that you know the divorce rate I know I read I read the news that the divorce rate uh started to go high to me right it's not something negative actually it's something positive you know why because you when you are working right you tend to have your own life outside


so you think that oh I'm married I go home I go back to my husband but the problem is when you live together you actually then know that actually you can't get along because of certain qualities because honestly speaking our generation people we don't think that we are married we should stick together all the time


so only a positive mindset, if they can bring, bring to say that uh I can't get along we can't get along you know mutual understanding, uh I'm very sure that this year even though the divorce rate is very high is all mutual understanding they understand each other


because, they always feel that divorce means it's a bad thing actually divorce is not a bad thing, for your own individual ya you having a children is a different thing but your own individual


people are celebrating divorce after they get divorced I'm shocked I see so much on facebook instagram they're celebrating their divorce like hen's night ya, like instead of hen's night birthday right people do ya people do celebrate divorce I mean not everyone but some of them because ya I mean it's our life we are control of our life everybody wants positive things I'm sure there's bad things so something which two people can have a mutual understanding


then why not why people have to take that negative still can be positive what


!wah!, for a lot of people I see a lot it's just not us but a lot of them are like that so not don't take it as negative so in twenty twenty the eye opener is circuit breaker for everyone


during circuit breaker actually I didn't go anywhere just like the


the common, I like to go to the swimming pool I like swimming actually I love swimming, but in my family no one really swims only me so I go with my cousins like your sisters I go with, them your, ya even we have been together before last time


ya so swimming is my favourite thing swimming just gives you excitement like, does swimming right doesn't matter you're huge or small, as long the ya as long you know how to swim it's something relaxing, when I was in secondary school then that's where I learn swimming


ya one more thing you know my father you know my my father drinks a lot right, ya my father is not a alcoholic but he's a person who tends to drink a lot whether he eats a meal or don't eat a meal he will drink a lot so circuit breaker period because you are not allowed to go down, correct circuit breaker period you are not allowed to go down at that period of time


he didn't he reduce the alcohol intake very very low and my because my father is very skinny, because a person who just drink and then don't eat their meals they will go very skinny, but during circuit breaker he put on weight that means I can see weight on his


calf, on his arms ah and then, ya and then he uh he he reduce his drinking during circuit breaker and my husband stopped smoking during circuit breaker, because you know my sister's daughter is living with me


so she's a child and I'm also asthmatic so normally he smokes he goes out of the house but now because it's not so nice to keep going out of the house right so circuit breaker period he stopped smoking so until when was that ah, may june right


june so after june then july august september, going to be october so it's like it's been like four months since he touched, cigarette ya, four months he didn't touch cigarette and then my father also like, four months cut down on alcohol a lot because he knows that now his tummy needs food


so it good the alcohol intakes go down the tummy go down, ya he felt a bit better and I feel better because whenever we talk on the phone you can hear the speech it's nice a older person not to drink so much a bit healthier


ya so, ya especially like you know those people they drink when they're tired that's a very common thing like for my father's case like you know like it's always lunch dinner even breakfast also he don't mind


even breakfast also he don't mind eating uh drinking beer so all that really changed so my mother became happier, then something nice for us to hear because they are getting old what, , so change a lot the health change their skin change start now start to go down even my brother my brother lost uh twenty KG in six months


ya he lost a lot of weight because same thing circuit breaker because they made them put on weight right, a lot of people put on weight right, then now ya


correct that's true but even though there's a bad there's always a good like the older people now they use the, phone video call they're pro they are more professional now to use, use that just like your mother remember your mother ya so


so for my positive experience in life is like that just every happy part one of it is circuit breaker the most major thing for me is my husband a person who's always been a friend like I tell you, uh I mean I've never faced any abuse by him or if I really badly need anything I only can turn up to him like I told you even though we don't have kids we I still do have him to to talk


just you know lah ya, everything you have a shelter a food on your table all these is something we have to teach our children these are positivity in life


so actually if you ask me everyday, correct it's true anyway every day is a good experience in life lah I mean of course there's a bad but definitely you can think the good


yup part one finance


okay Vinesh do you want to start from the back so that we don't repeat


(mmhmm)


oh when do your when do your policies mature ah like curious


[orh] okay okay, ya so for me ya my parents also help me invest, and then, currently I'm just like investing in StashAway because I don't know anything so robo robo advisory helps me


and then I also have a investment-linked policy that I just got, that will mature when I'm thirty five ya and then I'm, looking into like other ways to like accumulate my wealth not really to plan for retirement because that's not like one of my main financial goals currently


say again, question, ya finish


so, yup, same thing as just now I'll recommend starting early no new advice here but ya you start early and then you can like save and then with the money you can like you invest it and then you can let it like compound


ya and then besides that like taking a loan lah I guess, what about you


okay


how do you spend your money


so freak I cannot do math that's so little like honestly but you work right


so like, you've been you've been using your like NS savings to supplement your allowance ah, okay


understand for me , actually I I I get quite a lot of money I I get five hundred a month but then I still somehow manage to spend all of it, ya that's quite a lot but the thing is like I I don't spend a lot of time at home also so like most of the time like


my three meals I have it outside because okay like let's say I look at my five day like week uh my five day work week, I'll monday my mum works so I've to settle my own lunch because nobody cooks at home otherwise I have to cook but there's nothing in the fridge also then


tuesday sometimes tuesday friday tuesday thursday friday we have like practice two out of the three days and then wednesday I have night class so I'm literally in school like everyday and then I've to settle my meals and then like school food is like is like not exactly cheap


ya, so that's where my most of my money goes to like transportation is quite cheap because like I live very near the school so I just take a straight bus which is like one dollar less than that, ya


it's not even worth it because my if I pay like, per trip is cheaper ya so uh naw, I was I was I was going to read the question like what have you been spending too much on oh man I'm so guilty of so many things


I guess like, like you let me know your allowance I was like how the freak do you survive, because like ya like oh my god like drinking like got me so broke at the start of uni because like at the start of uni ya everybody will just go drinking like because


like bonding it's like the easiest way to bond, but then like one drinking session right can cost you like sixty bucks, , and then I'm like like sixty bucks uh like okay like maybe the drinks is like forty forty to sixty then after that people still want to supper so it like or they want to go club then you have to pay for like entrance fee so it's like one night out I have to spend like a hundred dollars that's my entire weeks' allowance


ya that's crazy and the thing is like I cannot say no to people like I really cannot like if you ask me I'll really go out so like I'll be spending my allowance and then usually it'll I'll eat into like, my savings so and before uni like I work a lot so I had quite a bit saved up but then now in terms of movable cash I only have a couple hundred left


ya okay no because like okay cause I started StashAway also like, I have money invest away then I pay for my insurance also ya but the thing is like I should have more money lah I I really should considering oh ya, my scholarship pays me also ya I have no clue where my money went


(ppc), I feel like it's too difficult though like everything that I spend on I've to put in so every time I go then I have to put in one ninety


honestly I don't know but I would say quite often like you know sometimes when you study and then you get bored and you're like eh let's take a walk take a walk entails like buying a waffle or like buying a drink


so I think it adds up lor maybe I snack too much


no then it's like like I'll be like oh let's take a walk then what do I want I want a drink what do I want oh Ayataka but then Ayataka in seven eleven costs me like two eighty


should I DIY or get a financial adviser to plan my finances honestly I want a financial adviser but I don't know like what are the cost like everybody is always like you can do it yourself like you don't need to pay for these fees but I don't know how to do it myself


honestly like they can recommend me things and then if it sounds uh good to my noob ears like I'll I'll I'll just do it


he's the one who sold me my my investment like insurance policy ya like ya I was just talking to him then uh no he he was actually talking to shauna and then after that he need I think he needed like one more to make one more sale to hit his like like goal or something ya


ya and then after that I was just there then after that he was talking to shauna then I was like eh what you what you guys talking about then he told me about this policy then I don't know how but like ya it was like over drinks then next morning I signed because shauna told me it was a good idea then I was like okay


I told you I'm I very impulsive like very


oh so you rather like keep your money like in your bank, is it no it's okay lah I get it I get it


but in my opinion it's like how wrong can it go like after all it's like so it's not some like some shady firm it's like a reputable like ya so it's like if anything goes wrong you can just go to the company and be like yo what's up with my policy


but the thing is like with this kind of policies you can customize your risk preferences one, ya so it's like you can take a more aggressive approach if you want to earn more or you can look for like more balanced growth, ya wait I was going to say something but I cannot remember what I was going to say


okay no never mind I can't remember what I was going to say it's fine


oh ya I remember what I was going to say yes because the reason why I did it right like I know a lot of people like don't recommend it because okay they feel like insurance agents are like scamming them, and then they don't feel like it's necessary to pay the fees but then at the same time I feel like as a twenty year old like I know nothing it's like I cannot help myself and then my parents barely help me like okay my parents only know how to buy like products so they don't really know how to like trade ya which is what I want


to do which is which is how you earn like the most money I guess and then , ya so I I honestly see it as the only option my twenty year old self has and especially like if I'm looking in terms of something more long term, and then for the the in terms of the fees right it's like I feel like it's just like it's justifiable because eh I'm not


looking after my my money lah I'm literally just putting money somewhere and then someone's helping me grow it so I'm I have to pay them for that what right ya and then because it's like giving me advice on like what I should do, then it's it's better than like to me it's better than just leaving my money in the bank


because okay if the money like A like interest rates are not very high and then B if the money is in the bank I can touch it if I can if I can touch it means that like I'll probably use it,


yes go talk to your financial adviser, okay I don't want to do question five okay okay you can do it you can do it


ya I do I do


wait is that a smart thing to do


nah I just want to know like like for future knowledge, I I'm I'm lazy , and ya actually that sounds quite smart


oh you know I I you know student loan like that is that there is no they don't charge you interest until you start working is it, okay okay until you graduate lah basically so before that there is like no interest at all


cause I know I know that people take out loans like even though they can pay for school like their parents pay for school but they don't actually need the money but they take the money and then they invest it that's crazy


ya I will I'll recommend that, !shit! maybe I should make my brother do it okay what advice would you give someone to get him or her out of debt ask their younger sibling to take a student loan reinvest that money pay for your debt


, student student loan syndicate


okay last question you can pick a good one, I think you should though like you should own one responsibly ya


okay, wait you don't have a debit card but you can pay using, but no like


does does it have like the word like Visa or masters Mastercard there because uh, no debit have I think that's can you flip it


ya that's that's my ATM card there's nothing you have to but you can change it, ya so I think like when when you're like fifteen sixteen they give you the ATM card then subsequently you can change it to your uh debit card like you know the DBS like debit card


but anyways, I feel like you should get it because credit cards like they offer a lot of reward rewards like you can get points or like cashback and stuff like that and a lot of discounts but then like you must make sure, that's true


eh but a lot of credit cards right when you sign up they have a lot of like rewards like sign uh you get the credit card then you get like Airpods for free that kind of thing I think you should I think you should consider it considering you have no earpieces, so ya what do it do it


oh !shit! sorry part three negative experience


okay Dinesh you go first what's your biggest pet peeve


ya okay lah unfairness but I feel like that's like something that angers me like in general but I feel like pet peeves is like something that's like a bit more stupid like something very trivial but like it drives me crazy so I would slow walkers I freaking hate it when people walk slowly


like I cannot stand it like legit if you're walking like like let's say like three of us and then I'm just like okay we're going waterloo we have like what like like thirty five minutes to eat and then I walk and then when I reach the traffic light I turn around right then like the group barely cross like campus green I'm like excuse me


I cannot stand it oh then you know my friend Huining uh she's like the worst walker in the world like literally I'll always be like three steps ahead of her because like she just refuses to keep up with me like just refuses


we're same same size same height bro she just doesn't want to walk quickly she just want to she just wants to stroll and I think I just like, for me I just like want to get places like I don't enjoy spending time like strolling in the singaporean heat so it's like once I exit from the bus like I want to walk straight to LKS you know


ya that's all, okay, recall a scene from a movie that made you cry in sadness, what


clara cried oh I cry all the time what I'm talking about, I cry a lot in korean dramas like I just finished watching crash landing ya I cried in the finale but it's like


it's not the worst finale so it was just like a couple tears it wasn't like a full on like, ya, I didn't watch it


ya I'll watch it one day, I cry about everything lah like especially like when it's like romance and then like you know when they can't get the guy because like life gets in the way like it's not their fault they're both in love but like some shit happens


ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya the our times our times ya dude I watch that once a year and I cried everytime, it's it's my go to cry movie wait you don't you don't you don't have like like a !wah! I really need to cry like kind of day


ya no some sometimes I'm like eh no humour man so uh sometimes I'll be like I really need to cry then I'll just watch that ya


so you've never like really not even when you watch like


man, it's getting too real bro, describe what you dislike about the older slash younger generation


what lah why you don't like about me


sorry you got cut off


ya, I agree I agree like uh that's one thing I don't like about the older generation also lah like I feel like they have the I've lived longer than you mentality so I know more than you like but then times have


okay so your experiences might not be valid in my situation anymore so who are you to say that my decisions and my opinions aren't valid right now, ya what about younger generation what


oh my god wait I was just about to say that I mean not about okay okay you go first


okay I was going to like say sexual but then like I just I I just don't like that the younger generations are growing up so fast like I feel like okay I get it like in the age of technology like a lot of parents are providing their kids with the means to view such materials like you see the people on tik tok then I'm just like wait you're fourteen you look like you're twenty


like what was I doing at fourteen like I was just eating eighteen chefs, like ya and then I feel like they're growing up so fast and then like, like I don't know I just see like a lot of them online like getting hurt and I'm just like if if you didn't try if you didn't try so hard to be like to be eighteen


and like I don't know maybe life would have been more enjoyable, I don't know if I want to


number six okay you can go first I'm not embarrassing


oh oh okay you go first oh man


ya,


oh my god


wait when was this, oh


but I think I think we are close enough leh I don't know, like so to you like we're not tight lah


oh ya I I would say that like we damn act up in the beginning like we not we not tight at all like to that extent if if if what we're portraying portraying is tight then we're not, tight at all but I feel like we are like casual tight I don't know


ya I was going to say like I understand your worries but it's like


I don't relate to it because I was the one who was like kicked from the group it's because I've like seen people being kicked from the group so it's like I feel like if my friends were so ready to like oust people right like who's to say that I'm not next, ya so I always like worry and then be like ah shit like like like let's say like you know A'level time like I never study with my my friends because like uh they just make me


feel very bad about myself lah because they they had like their shit together then they were just very very smart and then they were just very inconsiderate cause, I wasn't like keeping up with school so it's like you know I'll I'll I'll finish the paper and then does this, make me ostracize I don't know it just makes me feel sad like that point in time lah


like uh I remember because we just finished like our, one of our internal school exams I think like prelims or something and I I I really like, eh was actually A levels I cannot remember what it was a damn important exam and then like I remember feeling like super shitty about it because I couldn't do it at all and then after that like


they like to discuss answers ah but I remember it was our last paper so they wanted to go out and eat so that's like the only day where I came down to our group's table to like after the paper and then after that they were all discussing answers then I decide I didn't want to participate because I didn't have the answers lah I knew like I knew that I screwed up lah


so I just like sat there then after ten minutes I'm just like eh guys can we like literally talk about anything else like I don't want to talk about the answers because I know that I'm going to fail already, and then they were like oh ya okay okay and then another person came and then they continue talking about the answers then I'm just like obviously you don't care about me what like seriously like I tell you to stop how many times already because I'm like seriously not enjoying it and then after that I think


uh no then I didn't like I was just damn upset with the with the exam and then like nobody cared about me obviously so I felt like shit and then another friend like I think she also didn't do well for the exam then she we were all supposed to eat together then after that she just like


she didn't she didn't come to the table then everyone was like damn concerned like oh my god like where is she why isn't she here is it like something happen during the paper then they were like frantically looking for her then I'm just like, alright then you all have fun looking for her then I just sat there


I was like serious then turns out she was just at the mid autumn festival like nothing even happened she was just playing with the stupid lanterns, and then I was like !wow! guys I feel amazing damn tough times


ya it really be like that


seriously seriously, do you all still talk no you and him ya


damn


[orh], (uh huh)


he just pressure her ya, bro I if I was the friend I will hate him so much


but like like in the situation like what can you do like that was the reason why we ousted one of the girls also because she was just like so unnecessarily mean, I mean she came back to the group


like after two years like we reunited but at that point in time at the point in time like she was quite like intolerable lah like like we did tell her like eh that's not something you can say, like, like let's say like me and my friend then we'll just be like like she really workout sia like damn fat like legit like !wah! like


I don't know we're just complaining about like our general fatness right then she'll just be like oh my like fat oh if people are fat it's because they don't work out like they are just lazy it's not in your genetics it's something that you can control then I'm just like that's not something you can say especially if my face is right here


okay, !wow! wouldn't you want to know !huh!


I feel like texting my friends always make me smile I don't know, like whenever I'm texting then my friends always like eh who you texting ah like who you smiling about then I'm like literally nobody like I'm just texting like my regular friends and then I'm like smiling with a I don't know because I'm happy I don't know


ya uh let me think I know right other things oh when people are being sweet like when I didn't ask for it, ya like like


no like when you when when when people are being like thoughtful ya it's like you know like sometimes you're you're you're friends with this person for very long enough and then like after that you just didn't expect it like and then after that they got you something and then I mean like not buy you a present like let me think like it's a very like like ya


like there is like no like literally no money involved or like it it literally cost like one dollar or something but then it's like it's very very sweet lah like they just be like oh I just noticed that every time you eat this you always like drink this drink so I just got it for you, you then I'm like you remember my drink ya I appreciate that


what about you


friend couples like me and josh what what


ya !wah! studying that one really makes me smile man, ya really


eh what are the what other sacrifices you've made that are worth everything I don't know lah what sacrifices, same,


is it worth it


okay then never mind I I haven't really made any sacrifices also so like I feel like I've been quite privileged lah like whatever I want I just get,


okay so describe the best movie slash TV show you have ever seen and what do you like about it,


!aww!, freak I haven't watched right club


ya I heard, oh my god okay can you tell me what are the rom coms you like I'm kind of gay, that shit I watched it already I enjoy it


!wow! he running down the steps and singing , am I allowed to tell our friends this


, , !aww! let me think !wah! I cannot I have so many okay like I have so many favourites and so many genre so firstly, Haikyuu how could we forget about that Haikyuu


and my favourite Anime Dinesh, I literally talk about it all the freaking time, that's true but I wear the Haikyuu shirt all the time ya it's the shirt it's the shirt that I wore to welcome tea ya uh I


ya ya that one okay then never mind screw anime then I don't know I've I've got I've gotten into K-drama but like, what what what what what you going on


eh if you like if you like rom coms right you should watch it, the man inside


okay I like to watch the the like lovey kind