having a bank having a savings account I feel lah, and that's why I just prefer to use like debit cards because the thing with debit cards is you need to like punch in the numbers at for your nets and everything so it's, a overall is like more <mandarin>麻烦:ma fan</mandarin> it not <mandarin>麻烦:ma fan</mandarin> it's more


tedious you have to go out and spend money and be like oh do you accept nets and all that so it's more so it like deters me from spending too much money and in a way it's kind of like a strategy lah it's kind of a strategy to save money it's


ya I feel like in the long run it'll dissuade me from you know making frivolous expenses because even with that one percent cashback if you don't spend at all there's nothing to cashback that that's my personal that's my personal uh opinion


I also think that it makes you think twice about the things that you want to spend on, uh, uh I I I I'm not saying that I would never get a credit card ah


but I do feel that I'm a bit young to have a credit card cause I'm only yeah I'm only I'm not even like (ppc) I'm only turning, twenty like in november or so or like you I I'm not I'm not even like a legal adult yet so I feel like it's kind of unnecessary for me to have my own credit card when I don't need when you know


especially in this economy it's like eh it's not necessarily the best thing to have I feel ya for a for a for a young adult


no oh , in general I feel like it's not a wise idea because the couple can always break up, because I


I've never had a joint account with anyone before but I do feel that when you have a joint account, it I


if you are married and there's that commitment there why not, I feel that if there's I feel that if there's commitment then it would be better for the relationship as you know both parties are and are keeping each other accountable in terms of your finances and in terms of spending but however I've seen I've I've seen


some experiences lah that no they never necessarily happen to me but they've happened to other couples where uh because it's a joint account so every time they spend something right uh a message goes to both phones, so the the the wife can be like eh why you spending so much on this and the husband can be like eh why you spending so much on that


so they eventually so it defeats the point of in a sense having a joint bank account because they'll end up spending on these things using their own personal cards behind their spouses' back which defeat which I to me it defeats the whole point of having a joint account which is accountability because it in essence it could sour the relationship


I guess it I mean okay building off your point I guess it will have to depend a lot on context maybe I mean if what maybe if you just


take things for you say literally like okay this account is specifically for , joint spending you know like oh like housing mortgage bills et cetera like this account has a specific purpose to it and then you know and like you know we also have our personal account so there's their privacy to that so I think maybe has to depend a lot on the context


I think for me uh probably not so young uh


I think because I used to lose my wallet like all the time , so, I think what an appropriate age would be when they start working part-time and you know the boss needs to have an account to wire the money to so that's when they start they can start up their own bank account and I don't think you need to have a bank account in order to learn about managing your finances


yeah I you can just pass the kid like okay here's like five hundred cash for like one month and budget that yourself


as in you you don't not like five hundred dollar bill ah but like you know like loose change and your child will have to learn how to


they won't spend you know the hard earned part-time money on frivolous spendings like what a lot of teenagers do


yeah definitely cause because because uh I think it I


I think because with regards to like money at such, it's uh a lot of people I mean until you start working and you for your own money you they will learn they'll understand that oh


money is hard ya money is difficult to earn money is hard to come by and aren't and you know it's I I do feel like it's like the every everyone's ever first ever paycheck is a very big stepping stone into adulthood ya


agree , because with it I'll just pull back go back to the point about losing your wallet because I every time I lost my wallet I had to replace my EZ link card so what if they have their bank card inside their wallet


I mean there's ya


I haven't really thought about that uh I am considering the POSB savings account but uh when I do have my own kid I will ask him to I will ask him or her to do their own research and then come back to me with three options, that's


I mean in this age of Google in this age of Google you can Google and learn everything, you know like I I want them to do their own research and then come back to me and tell me okay these are my three options and why I pick these three options and I and if I approve then I'll be like okay I think that this is the best option out of the three so let's go for this one ah because I


like, ya like if you want your own bank account you need to show you need to prove to me that you know what you're doing because what's the point if you just if I just open up a bank account for you and I do all the work but you don't understand how a bank account works you don't even understand the the concept of interest rate how does that show me that you're mature enough to handle your own finances


ya but the thing with cash is that they don't understand the concept of interest rate, it


definitely I I just feel that if because I don't really think it's necessary to have a bank account until like you start working but if they really insist on one I'll be like okay pick a few and show me why and prove to me that you are mature enough to handle this and if you know what you're doing okay sure I'll let I'll let you open up your own


it's like


part three negative experience describe a time where you felt feel that nobody cares about you everyday ha just kidding


err definitely during my secondary school days that was like I think cause I had like I, I wouldn't say I had zero friends I did have a few acquaintances here and there but they, didn't really know about the struggle that was in my heart and the and like the school teachers they tried to get to know me the they sent me to counselling and everything but


I can tell that they were doing it because they wanted me for the sole for the sole reason of me performing well academically cause I knew that if I was performing well academically but I was having this I was still going through like thoughts of suicidal thoughts and everything they wouldn't even bother to send me to the counsellor because they they would think that everything is fine


honestly speaking so that's why and like the family situation wasn't working out too well either so I just felt very alone and that no one really bothered to get to know what was in my heart and they were too focused on what was on a piece of paper ya


err I think for me I'm not that hung up about results because I know that, okay I know that I'm not academically talented like the only reason why I showed academic promise when I was younger was because I had great teachers it was because I went for tuition on the side but the thing is that I guess but the thing is


that as I grew older I realised that ah I don't really like studying anymore I, I guess some people really enjoy learning but I'm not just not one I'm just not one of those people that really enjoy learning and even if I do appreciate what's going on during the lesson I appreciate the content I just


don't I just don't like the way it's tested and because of that I just don't feel that I'm academically inclined so to say so I would, say one of the most heartbreaking moments in my life was when ah a very close friend of mine just walked out of my life


and he really he really promised a lot and he really you know he really took care of me very well for like the for like the while we were still friends while we were still best friends but then , one day uh we had a fight over Whatsapp and then he just walked out of my life and never looked back and then he started


and then I think it was just very heartbreaking because I really trusted him with everything like I try I told him all my secrets like he was really like the one bro that could have my back but then he just like walked out and, it was basically that and he was the only person that I trusted and then he just walked out and then he left and it was like


oh so no one actually cares about me after all he's just like all these other people that say they care but they actually just don't care, ah I, and he walked out of my life like two months before O levels and it was just like !huh! it was yo yo it was it was really messed up and then after that he got together with this girl on my birthday like I have feelings for him lah but and he knew that I have feelings for him but I he just walked out


even though I never acted on my feelings and then he got together with this girl on my birthday immediately after my O levels so for like a good two years I couldn't celebrate my birthday, ya I know right and like I think it was, like I think looking back it really taught me to like learn how to trust people properly like you can't just anyhow trust people you really need to test them first and to just be more careful with who I gave my heart to lor ya and


ya it was really definitely very heartbreaking I think it was just because I think not I think not just because of, the event but I think it was because of the sequence and the timing of it like two months before O levels I'm already under a lot of stress and boom he just walk out of my life and then after my O levels on my birthday you know it's supposed to be !yay! O levels are over school like you know


I don't care about studies and then boom he get together with this girl I'm like !ouch! it's like you walked out of my life already why it's like you walked out of my life already why're you still doing damage to my life it's like you walked out already it's supposed to be over but then boom you find a way to sneak attack


, ya and it's like okay never mind forget it but ya that that was I think it was just the sequence of events that happen which why which is very really nice timing


uh I think for me it wasn't necessarily what I said but how I said it because there was someone it so basically like uh


I had a I had this classmate she was indian and then I and then my friend started speaking funny then I'm like are you trying to imitate so I said are you trying to I said are you trying to imitate an indian accent, then like so so she she got a bit offended and she spoke to me that was the first time like someone actually confronted me about you know making people feel uncomfortable and I feel so bad


ya and okay can we can we actually just on a can we just go on a lighter note since the topics have been quite heavy like can we I want to talk about uh a popular trend that you dislike,


ah so many events so many so there's this like so there's this like trend, on on like Tiktok where they , like I think what they said oh I try to I kissed my best friend that's like of the opposite gender and like oh my


god so romantic he kissed back and I'm just like yo that's so fake it's a literal trend on Tiktok and I'm just like cause the thing is that these Tiktok things keep popping up on my Instagram feed and I'm just like I'm so over it


it's like yo okay first of all you do not video yourself kissing your friend that's kind of weird I feel like I'm seeing something I shouldn't be seeing , like like I'm gonna angle my phone at this angle and then kiss my friend instead of telling him !hey! I have feelings for you you know what let's just grab him by the neck and kiss him that's that's weird


I I feel like I'm seeing a point of your life that's a bit too intimate and I kind of don't want to see this , err


I guess, I guess but I but I think with I think with Tiktok there are like pros and cons I think but I feel that I think because


we're older right we see more cons than pros , that , these cringey dances are , I don't know man as a dancer I see them and they like, !woo! we're dancing and I'm like no you're not


, no you're not no you're not, not no you're not like like no , and there's and because the thing is that the users of this Tiktok app are so young and they are really engaging in some very sensual dance moves that I feel like when I see them I feel like I'm participating in child pornography


like like, no they freaking looked like no they are like twelve and they are like trying to twerk but they have no butt to twerk but they are like trying to twerk and like they're wearing like, really short shorts and crop tops and like really just putting themselves in very


ya you know they're they're like they are like really bringing uh unnecessary attention to themselves, you know what I mean because there are things like there're things like online predators and everything so I just don't like the trend of very young and impressionable girls just oh my gosh this dance is so hot it's so sexy I'm just gonna try to emulate that but like you're fourteen you shouldn't be emulating that


yeah, I think I just think I'm just so over trends that are like over like hyper sexualised you know especially these trends being marketed towards such young


individuals you know, because especially they're so young and then like your friends will see it like the boys at school will see it you really want the boys at school to look at you in that way is this really the best thing for you to do


it's you ya exactly and you know is thirst trapping really like the best way to quote unquote get your crushes attention instead of being smart and funny or him just liking you because you're a great person what happened to that


everything is very everything's very curated now it's very staged, I


guess , ya, what are what is one thing that you will never joke about, I don't think


I, ya like I wouldn't just tell my friend eh you should go and kill yourself like oh my god no


like like go F yourself go Yeet yourself off a cliff I don't want be your friend anymore I can't say things like that because these things have hurt me


yeah and I think I think like it I think, because I'm so serious right a lot of my friends joke and I take it seriously and they're like they have to explain to me it's a joke and I'm like oh okay ya it's a joke, and they always ask me like oh why are you serious I'm just like I guess I guess I've been hurt a lot by people in the past so


maybe it's been awhile since I've or maybe it's a bit of both you know being able to let loose and things but there are boundaries that I don't joke about like maybe maybe things like oh finance I'll never joke about someone's financial background


it's very insensitive, ya I feel that making others the butt of the joke is inappropriate, like it's a inside joke you know it's like if it's like an inside joke then this person's always broke because literally this person he's very bad at spending money then we'll just say eh never mind ah we treat this guy this guy always broke one you know like that's fine but then


for me if I'm like with people that I don't really know very well or like with people that are tend to be a bit more, sensitive or like maybe the subject's a bit controversial I'll intentionally make myself a butt of the joke, ya definitely so this way like you know they can also like let loose a bit lah cause you're not taking yourself too seriously or can be like yeah I'm not so pretty what look at my freaking hair I look like a chinese ghost


I don't really I don't wanna undo anything because I'm happy with who I am now, I think because right now I'm quite happy with who I am I'm afraid that if I go anything I'll just screw everything up


I guess maybe because I'm approaching my twenties and my hormones have finally decided to calm down after puberty I I feel like I can think logically like the frontal portion of my like the frontal lobe of my


brain is developed I can think logically without all these estrogen or like weird shit or like immature friendship drama I just, think like I just think that when you like you enter your early twenties you you you start to get a


for me lah I I start to get a sense of calm I'll just be like you know what I I think I just I think because of what happened and everything my my philosophy is that life is life, it's gonna kick you in the ass and that's okay because that happens to everyone


just move on [loh], yeah, ya which is why I don't think I need to change anything


positive experiences, okay so I guess I'll start the conversation flowing uh what is a hobby or activity that you felt happiest doing as a child


uh I think for me the first thing that comes to mind is dancing I really really enjoyed dancing I really enjoyed performing I really enjoyed singing I just I I guess because you know like I just love attention


you know every child loves attention and just wants the world to stand up for them and clap like that's the most narcissistic feeling in the world and I like it , how about you


I think for me what are what were the best parts of your childhood ah I


don't really think you can say things like best or worst but I would say the best are usually the heart to heart conversations that I had, with my parents and I remember one of my parents telling me when I was young was that right now you're like a two out of a hundred and I asked why and my parents said that oh because


you have so much left to improve on there's so much work to do you know and I think it was like the first time someone because uh when I was young I was really talented in lot of things like pretty all pretty well-rounded I was you know artistically talented


with regards to dance and I was academically talented and no one had ever told me that oh I wasn't good enough I , I needed you know to improve and it was the first time that oh uh my own parents said that !hey! you actually don't need to improve like a little bit but you really have a lot to work on and I think it was the first time


that uh it was the first time that I receive constructive criticism so that was a really big that really uh touched my life ya it's a really big impact it was it's one of the more vivid memories eh which is why I say it's the best part of my childhood because uh


I think that was where I really start that was when uh one of my my parent really started to treat me uh they they decided not to shield me too much on the world but !hey!, it's about time to grow up like to burst the bubble a bit ya


uh, I think on my part there's definitely one thing that sticks out which is okay let's get a bit personal here it's about like religion like I think the the the I think


okay I was born into a second generation christian family but then uh kind of like drifted away from the faith due to family reasons but then in my late teens like when I was like sixteen ya I decided to, give my life to jesus so that means I decided to become like a proper christian like I decided to okay you know what I'm not gonna come to church because my parents are bringing me to church every sunday I'm coming to church not because you know there's a cute guy at church I'm not coming to church because of my friends but I'm coming to church because I actually want to get to know this god


I actually want to give I, I was in a very I I had like mild depression and my life was going I was going to a lot back then so I was like okay you know I'm sick and tired of living with mild depression and I'm sick and tired of you know having suicidal thoughts every hour and I'm sick and tired of living life like this because this is not a fun life to live and I was like if


if what the pastors says is right you know I'll if the pastor really says that you know god can change lives then okay then let's just give it a try lor proof to me that I told god if you know, prove to me that you can change my life change my life if you say that you know if if god in the bible it says that you love me right then show me then change my life around and ever since that day uh I've


improved a lot in terms of my maturity I've improved a lot mentally I've improved a lot emotionally I'm in a much more , emotionally stable place I'm in a I'm financially stable I have a better relationship with my family I have healthy relationships with friends you know I have cut off many toxic relationships from the past you know I'm overall a better person and


than I am and looking back I don't think back then I could have believe that I could have reached this point in life where I can say that I'm happy with who I am and that's because uh I, and that's because I gave my life to god and that's because I chose to give god a chance to change my life so that is really the best thing that I've ever quote unquote done for myself is by saying yes to jesus


uh, I think touching on the question that who are the people you most cherish in your life and why I'll definitely, say they are my my boyfriend and my close friends because like even though a lot of my friendships are quite seasonal in terms of you know because you know I graduated we graduated and we drift apart I'm still grateful for them because


they because they really gave me a sense of normalcy cause during my secondary school days and during my poly days I didn't really get along well with my peers and you know but but you know I got along with them and we met up pretty frequently and they really gave me


and they were really like my first quote unquote like friend group you know what I mean and everyone I felt that you know it was the first time that I could just like be myself be with friends have normal conversations you know it just I just didn't have to be sad alone I could be sad with my friends ya and


I think with my partner is that , we've known each other for a very long and every time we get together I just feel that he pushes me to become better you know every time I do something, questionable he always wants he always asks me why and he always tries to probe and you know probe ask probing questions and really get to the reason of why do you do this you know are you sure that you know this is the best route to go and


basically he has he sets high standards for me because he knows that I can do better but he doesn't force me to hit them rather he's very patient and I, think that's what I'm very grateful for him for always being very patient with me and overall just really not giving up on me even though I made so many mistakes ya and


I also have colleagues that I'm very grateful for because my job isn't very easy it's quite taxing mentally and emotionally but you know they will do simple things ah like buy sugarcane or like crack jokes in the staff room and we'll be like !haiya! usually things like these are like small little highlights of my day that I really appreciate


, I think for me no no really I don't can't really think of like a song lyric I mean if but I guess maybe if I were really to


pick one would be a christian song lah but it's a direct quote from it it's based off a it's based of an event in the bible where, three men were thrown into the fire but they managed to survive so the song is loosely based on that and one of the lyrics was I'll walk through the fire and not be burned pray in the night and watch it turn jesus tonight I'm giving it all to you so


I think definitely there were many I think during when I was listening to that song I was in a very dark place I was contemplating suicide you know I was really I was just not at a good place and not a lot of things were working out and I, and I think this song really gave me a lot of comfort this song really gave me


the motivation to really just push on and press on and , looking back now I realise that if it wasn't for that situation I wouldn't have this iron clad determination to survive it's not even like a determination to oh I'm going to make the most of life it's really just a simple determination to live and to continue living


ya and maybe if we move on how will life how will your life be like if you were a millionaire , (hmm) I think I would honestly speaking if I could control if I could have millions I will live very simply


I don't think you need big houses or like like fancy cars or I don't really think you need that to be happy I believe in the simple things in life


ya ya,


well first of all I'll give one tenth of the million to jesus cause tithing, then after I tithe I would maybe keep some for my education because I need to go to, uni and after I pay off my uni fees I will probably give the rest to I would probably want to sponsor a child living in


Africa because, they really need the money I would not sponsor one I'll sponsor a few because, oh they can't ya can sponsor quite a few and you know they really I really believe that


every child should be blessed with resources because they didn't ask to be brought into this world with no they didn't ask to be born into a place with no resources they didn't ask to be born in the middle of a war , ya definitely so money to sponsor them to give them an education to make sure there're clothes on their back and there's food for them to eat and there's a shelter above their head


exactly exactly ya


I mean because we are blessed ya cause we're blessed to be born in a country where basic education is mandatory but for them basic education is an option , which I


(uh) around the same


part one finance okay so uh the first one how do you invest your money to accumulate wealth and or planning for retirement


okay uh, investment wise right because I am a dummy in investment so , I think like the most the most like simplest thing is to like invest in like companies that are like kind of like consistent with you know uh they're consistent lah so like you can get like dividends and


what not but also like growth investment, for example like companies like startups cause you know like you would expect them to grow so in return like your dividends will grow, and something like that ya


ya, I I mean, for sure like for our age right is like super, and especially like this period all cause COVID period right so it's it's kind of risky to even like step into investment at this point of view but


once you have like a stable job with you know you know that your income can like, like sustain you lor then that's when you can start to consider into like investment and stuff like that, ya uh


not that I know of because right TVH right a lot, a lot of my friends don't really know much about investment either, because like we're not into the mindset of like, of like income and trying to like seek for like financial stability cause like a lot of us still like


depend on like, like either our parents or like we're just busy studying so I don't really know of a lot of friends but like I don't know do do you have friends who are like that,


, , , right


I think like they are ya actually what you say is like kind of correct but also because I like what you say lor


cause is is quick is in their minds is quick easy money like you put it in like a certain amount and then it'll grow so like, that's why people are so quick to jump into the bandwagon just because it's easy but it's actually like a lot of factors that that lead into it or whether like your money can even grow in the first place and then like looking into context now also and like whether you can be stable


and like a lot of factors lor so ya, , for sure for sure, (hmm) I think like


okay honestly right I don't, because I was raised in a family that saves a lot so I don't spend unless I need to spend that's like so I'm not the kind that like go online shopping those kind of person I usually just spend on things that I need


and because of that I'm able to like save up a lot of course like, all this kind of investment stuff is like not in my head yet of course cause like I mean I'm still studying lah so like I don't even have a steady cash flow like steady income but my main way of, like having being able to


spend and whatnot is like, to like saving lor and like, I'm working part time as well so that's like a side hustle for me to get money ya,


I mean like, nevermind you say first I also I still thinking you say first


right


, you have , right so do you have like a I don't know like a like you


you have a cap ah you have like a cap like oh like for let's say for like gadgets like what's the cap that I can spend or like for like clothing or something like, that


, facts facts


I mean like, okay I spend mostly on food like literally cause like , ya I spend a lot on food not so much on like clothing and like clothing wise right I don't usually buy


like those kind like, I go like h and m or like you know those kind of like branded so called branded cotton on kind of things I usually just buy from like thrift stores or you know those kind of like, ya I


I guess for money for for food wise right I have a cap lah cause I tend to spend a lot so like maybe, ya I will have a cap for that lah cause I I tend to like to go outside and eat a lot ya but other than those


it depends on, it, it depends though it really depends on like, the individual and of course like with trends and all


it depends whether you want to like hop on these trends and uh a lot of people tend to hop on this trends without even thinking of like, is it really like, is it like practical or not so for me right I really look into practicalism like if I see a brand right and like I can find a cheaper alternative which is you know it serves the same function then like


by all means like I don't really care if it's like branded or whatsoever if it's like sixty bucks let's say and if I can find like a cheaper option then by all means, but I think a lot of people nowadays they just buy


number one because they want to (ppc) maybe hop on the bandwagon, for whatever reason ya and number two because like, I think like maybe status also plays a part, like if you are, you know well to do you're tend to buy a lot of


branded items without really thinking much about financial things, ya , (ppc) I mean like


it's up to them [orh] whether they want to spend it or not because like number one they have a steady income so like you all kind of financially stable but then again like, there're external factors that come in and you don't know whatever that can happen like like look at around on like who who expected COVID to happen right and like people are losing jobs and whatnot so like


honestly a stable income is doesn't mean that like you are forever like you know ah forever stable lor cause like things like this can happen, and


for sure hundred percent for sure, I mean spend on whatever you want to spend but think of like like external externalities that can happen, ya you know ya


(hmm)


use like spend less on your other like your IT stuff and like your clothings and whatnot, right


might as well right ya (hmm)


I mean like I definitely saved a lot of money especially like circuit breaker we can't like go out and stuff like that so because food is like, one of my biggest expenditures right I can't go out to eat so I also eat at home lah a lot uh but I think like because like once I go out again right I have this tendency to to compensate for the time that I don't go out and it


so just like, I mean because your reason of spending more is cause of offers right my reason of spending more especially on food is to compensate for the period where I don't spend on it especially because like, uh some


something like that lah like like it just doesn't feel right especially because it's like, because it was school break and like I usually school break I go out with a lot of my friends to eat right and like it just felt so empty I had to, compensate it somehow I like low key regretted it but


I mean there's , this just a way for me to go , consolidate myself I guess, oh actually right every time I go out with my friends right I will have like a budget so like I don't exceed like twenty or like twenty five for a meal cause like we usually go out to eat in cafes so like the price range like seventeen or twenty whatever it is then like


I try not to exceed that lah but of course sometimes I do and, ya, it's not great what about you, , , right oh


ya, oh


it is , ,


right, right


it is quite smart actually ya, but for me like cause I didn't set like two accounts so I had to kind of like manually, not manually lah but like, I will note down my spendings for say like the month


or like a week and then let's say if I spend too much then I have to like okay so I have to like scale down a bit for the next week I'm kind of like that, so it wasn't automatic for me mine was like I had to kind of like manually, set a cap ya


I mean like the things that I spend on and then like I will see like oh does it like exceed you know my budget or like my cap for the week and then let's say if it exceeds right then like I will plan [orh] like okay then like maybe like I don't spend so much on certain things and stuff like that and plus it is a bit easier for me because like I say I grew up in a


family where like I save a lot and we only buy stuff that we need so , I kind of have like a better control, on like whether like on my spendings lah ya basically


, !siala! five years ago I was fifteen sia, uh , uh


after NS is it oh so this was recent, the two accounts is recent is it oh okay right


that's good, ya , my god relatable oh my gosh yes


that was what happened to me when I was like, because you know like after JC to uni there's like a large gap like a nine month gap so I started working and then I had a lot of side hustles as well and then like I was generating quite a like


like uh, income lah then I was like !wah! I got a lot of money ah okay lah I will go like splurge and stuff like that wasn't great lah but I think it's just like human instinct [orh], like ya, it takes time of course like because it's the first time so I forgive myself for doing that lah but


ya, relatable ya but one thing that I'll tell myself like three, and like five years ago uh is not to be over dependent on my parents because like


okay I'm still learning to to not be dependent because sometimes you know I tend to depend on them even up till today when like I already like can earn my own money and stuff like that, and like, is like I just want to be financially


independent and be responsible ya like I want to be responsible for my own things it


ya of of course it depends on like social like, social economic status and whatnot if you are like rich and your parents are rich then like for sure man but like I'm I come from a normal family and I and my my parents work so hard and even like for my dad he's he's already at retiring age but he's still working and I feel


like it's not right for me to still depend on his money when like I can actually work and earn my own, and I just didn't want to like burden my dad lor and, that's why lah I also look up like financial schemes to help me you know like bursaries and scholarships and at the same time I'm working as well so


ya lor, for as in financial help like bursaries and whatnot, ah no what do you think what do you think


for sure


correct, yes that was my aim also ya wells (oo)


part three negative experience, okay ,


extreme sadness ah, , (oo), do you have any in mind or should I go first


okay you share first lah,


oh, ya


, oh no, so like now you don't like to draw anymore, !aww! it's kind of sad I think like aligning with passion and whatnot I mean like just now you talked about theatre like you literally can talk about it for hours


but , there was one time I had like, a performance it was like my first major performance and by major I mean like I was the lead role and kind of stuff like that, , and then I, invited my family to watch it that was also the first time that I invited them because I was like like I want them to see like my passion and stuff like that and


I guess for my family they didn't really like the idea of me doing theatre cause it's very, it serves no future number one and my family just doesn't like theatre so when they watch it I was expecting myself to I was expecting them to feel very like


proud and whatnot and , I mean after the performance they took pictures and me and whatnot but then when I went home they kind of like reprimanded me they were like why are you doing this and stuff like that and so like it was something that I felt that


it could have been the best I I I came I came into the production and like I came on that day feeling so excited and, like I want to see their reaction and whatnot but then I went home and then, and then that happened and so I


I felt like at that point something kind of like die in me like it can't uh back then I was very passionate and I was like I really want to pursue this and, I was so sure of it then like after that like particular performance, and production like something died in me ah like something tells me like okay maybe it's not it's not for me and it was very disappointing because I worked so hard for it and I mean they they praise my acting and whatnot and blah blah blah they just they just said like oh like you know


, you can be better off doing these kind of things and I'm just like, because like okay financial is one thing and like I said like my family doesn't really favour these kind of things and also like


I don't know like ya like they view acting as something that's not, great in a sense I mean you know like based on like religious reasons and whatnot but also like


I don't know like like it was my first lead role lah so like they were shocked, with, uh ya, kind of also they were like


oh also like there were like, ya it's basically like just that lor and like, other factors there are of course like other factors lah, contributing to it but, my whole point is that during that production itself something


something died in me and like some part of like my passion died as well that's why like uh ya was something I could not forget lah, ya what do you mean


this oh it didn't die completely, it didn't die completely but I had like a new uh perspective that I cannot pursue this, as, something that I want outside of my CCA or outside of like school I cannot pursue this as a job I don't think I can pursue this as a job because I wanted to pursue it as a job


like I kind of want to be , part of okay what I want to be right, I kind of want to be a theatre practitioner which is like like a director cause I really like directing but like after that, and it was my last production that was my last production


which is my last most latest production just something in me died lor, my passion is still there it's just that, I know that I cannot pursue this as you know a job [loh] and like something that I really like doing, ya


, they just think that there are other alternatives and I don't blame them, because they do have valid reasons as to why I cannot pursue this no matter how much I like it and I get their standpoint it's just that it's something that's hard for me to reckon with because it's it's a passion of


mine and, like I really like it but you know just knowing that you cannot you can't persuade it's just like disappointing, ya so


, ya , I mean


ya that's reality ah I mean I've accepted it, I guess that's good oh so ya ha


let me think, ya you can go on, what do you mean


I did not no right


right


the wrong use of intelligence ya, ,


, right


you cannot control your emotions lah, right


I mean being harsh isn't wrong like setting them straight and whatnot, for sure


I mean wisdom and harshness I think is a good cause you can't just like, you can give them wisdom but if they're already set with the beliefs that they have it's going to be hard for them to change especially for like influential people where they feel that


they're in a status of power and, like, sometimes a wisdom doesn't work for them fully, so that's why like I feel like harshness and wisdom is a is a good combination to like really like set them straight and like humble them mah


uh, I mean hypocrites are one of them, I don't really no I don't really like them uh


I also don't like people who are very arrogant like I really hate this kind of people who are so arrogant and like, because I've met people who are like that and for one I cannot I don't want to deal with them number two then comes in like the second question that comes into my head is like what about the people that they the other people that they have met you know


that has to deal with this kind of thing like I'm just one person who has to deal with it but there're so many other people who has to deal with like this kind of people's arrogant-ness arrogance, and like the problem with them right, is that they see themselves always as correct


like you try to like you try to like I don't know, like you try to you to humble them but they just see themselves as right and, I just I don't know like it's this kind of people are just like for me I don't really like because not because of like I will


I will feel hurt from it but more so like the the other people that, these people this person will hurt and and also like, like who are you to think that who who are you to think that you are very like a good like you're always correct you're always like tip top you're always perfect kind of thing you know like everyone has their


for sure hundred percent ya for sure, ya ya and like, and like arrogance is also the reason why like other people are discriminating other people and like belittling other people like who are you to


to think that you are so good you know and ya lah I think like, the problem, one thing that I hate from like people who are arrogant right because they belittle other people they, they always forget to consider like the other like circumstances ya the prospectus and the circumstances that person is under


like sometimes they just blame it on their personality like oh like you know maybe like cause you're lazy that's why you're this but you don't know the other factors that, that come into play into this kind of things like, why is this person lazy there're other factors financial factors uh I don't know social status the people this this person has been like around with all plays a factor and I think sometimes arrogant people right they don't consider those kind of thing


and then like when they belittle right they just like they just look into their personality lor ya kind of learned this in psychology but forgot the term so, ya ya ya ya


is kind of tough ah outright outright legit like there was this I mean I've had a few friends who are like that, and because of like, because like , ya lah they just think that they're better [loh] then they kind of like treat you as a secondary


thing which like okay I'm okay if like you have like a lot of friends to attend to like I'm okay with that you know I'm totally okay with that but like if you like you only come to people when like they need your help and stuff like that and also they kind of like, shove it in your face that they're like better than you kind of thing you know and I had friends who are like that and it's just like why


what the heck man we're like friends why why do you need to shove that in my face ya, sorry , at first I thought that you know coupled with my low self esteem-ness I always think that it's my fault and it's me in the friendship or relationship that is like that but like it came to a point where I just like like dude like if you don't even have the decency to


not, like treat us as like equal in like a friendship or like to give the the same effort as I do in this like friendship or relationship, then sorry ah I deserve better I don't I don't have to like mess with you I don't want to like talk


to you and how I like stop friendship right is , not like I confront them and whatnot if it came to a point where like I advise and you don't want to fix it I will just ignore you, and I just don't want to I just don't want to talk to you anymore lah, just ya what about you


right, have you ended have you ended any before, !wow! that's good


ya,


right


for sure, ya,


part two positive experience,


uh , uh question about her okay no uh let me think , , okay honestly right, I love it that like this is very weird for me to say this but I love that like life is very random


ya because like, ya it's thrilling and also the fact that we're like still very young so I like to think like I get I I have a good future in front of me and like you know because like when you reach a certain age right you start to worry like oh my god I have so many things that I need to do and stuff like that but like I don't know like at the age that I am now right I feel


like there's so many things that I can do and I know like it sounds like being too ambitious but if that's what's going to get me through live then like so be it man, okay what about you , , okay okay your turn


for sure


ya ya I mean like basic,


ya , ya cool


well then, what are you thankful for then since you say you are kind of in a place in your life where you know


, yes yes


(ppc), (ppc) yes


the simple things ya for sure for sure, (hmm)


ya that's so true I mean like it's essentially the same things lah but like honestly, because of the fact that you know for my family background right we didn't start off very well so I think that the biggest thing that I'm thankful for is like first of all the the simple things sometimes I often like


we really underestimate this kind of things lah, like, like even having a support system like a family as your support system I often like neglect it because like, like you know like everyone has it so like you know you know when everyone has it you're like it's not really something to


ya like, like it's not something you should be thankful for cause is like common sense it should be there it's like the bare minimum but some people don't even have the bare minimum you know and like it really makes you, think like it makes you ponder lah and also because like like I said like we didn't start off well to do so so seeing myself now and like where I am now I'm thankful that you know like I made it this far lor


and like my family has made it this far ya, because and and of course like I still have like so many things to work on and also like my family has a lot of things to work on but, but you know sometimes it's good to just look back to like where you come where you where you came from and and be thankful lah ya it's a motivation as well


ya ya, ya I, a very bad memory uh memorable moments okay


, okay ,


, what the heck , , , wait I felt like


I heard this story before though, okay I don't remember but I felt like I heard this before I just like oh my god you, (hmm) okay memorable thing for me ah wait does it like leave a mark on you or something


no right , eh actually I also sia you know, right like, in primary school right I cause we all always play catching right and stuff it's always catching you know then like we're playing ya it's always catching ah reckless times


ya like I was, I was almost like going to catch my friend you know then like I accidentally fell like I didn't catch and she ran faster so I fell forward right and, then like my head did this like bounced like on the rough floor and it's not like the the pavement kind of floor eh is like those one like rock kind of texture you know it left a mark on my head


it's still here up to today but of course like you can't see it anyway and like it left a mark on my hand permanently up till today I still have it, so moral of the story just don't play catching anymore simple times ah okay kay kay but what about like like as you like you know like in like your JC days or like I don't know your NS days


, up till today ya


oh my god rude okay ya


nice


ya !aww!, !aww! that's so wholesome okay nice that's wholesome ya actually for mine is also the same because like I realise like my JC friends are the ones that, have stuck through stuck with me cause I mean I think JC


okay JC was like the best and the worst phase of my life ah truth be told it was really like the best and the worst so I really experience a lot and like my friends really have to like stick through like , stuck need to stick to me lah and so like you know they're really the friends that like out of everyone right


I have, the most number of like JC friends that I have that I still keep in contact up till this day and you know like, like whenever I need help and whatnot and sometimes we even study together up till this day so, you know ya and because like correct ya


like like we had to deal with a lot of BS ah and like like I see through my friends worst points and like worst moments where I just like like oh my gosh like do I still want to be friends with you those kind of thing like after all the things all the BS have to put through and of course like they also have to put up with my BS ah


but I think like, like what you say ah like with every bad, thing comes a good thing so I think like, the testament of a uh whether like your friendship is a you know will be long lasting is if you're able to put up with this kind of phases and like emerge through it lor and like I think like somehow for me and my friends


we learn to first of all embrace that you know we all have these flaws and we learn to like, help to make each other better, people ya healthy sia ya I mean ya


(mmhmm) , okay I'm someone who's like I think I told you this before I'm I have very low self esteem so I really don't believe in myself like back in the past like I will let people step on me serious like deadass is like !wow! so


I didn't have confidence in myself and I wanted to be confident so what I did was like I went to join all these like leadership roles in in JC and it backfired because like I was just trying to like put on a facade that like you know I'm I want to be confident so like I put a lot of confident front but I let like people step on me


and, it came to a point where like I had enough ah like really I it it there came a phase in like j two where, not only in my CCA but also my teachers and like there are people who use like my grades against me and what not, and like


like there came to a point where I had enough ah like I told myself I really deserve better than this like why am I like letting people like step on me for like, for their own benefit and like some and oh back in the past right I will always tell myself like I want to others before myself like last time I always like others before myself like whatever if they're happy then I'm happy but like nowadays


nowadays like I'm I think like it's important to prioritise myself ah, and it's more of like, myself than others but and people might think it's a bad thing, but it ya for sure and and and


for sure and like times where I took care of myself more than others there're people who, raised doubts and like what the hell why you so selfish and kind of thing lah like kind of stuff like that and then it makes me consider ah like, like am I overdoing it am I being too selfish and that's like a problem that sometimes I faced up till today but one thing that I'm glad from is that nowadays I


I'm I really stand by by my beliefs and I I learned to be more confident in my own skin internally and externally also oh like, uh like sometimes right you don't , a popular opinion might not necessarily be a correct opinion


and that's something that I always fail to realise in the past last time right I always just like if it's wrong and like other people think it's correct okay we just follow the majority and like some of my ideas are often like the minority ideas that are like not recognised and then I will just follow other people just because like


you know majority think is correct but like now that I think about it like what the heck, is is not necessarily right ah so okay I talk too much already ya, but what about you that's enough out of me


, talk too much already I talk too much already, I did I did really, ya eh I I I had a epiphany a huge epiphany in JC and like I struggled with it a lot and even up till now I still struggle but it's it's getting better and I it's good progress no matter how small ah ya


what about you (hmm) what about your NS days you reflect a lot right in your NS days,


(ppc), (mmhmm)


ya ,


, for sure


ya,


ya, , uh, weird skills ah must be weird ah I don't really


talents ah (ppc) well I did like theatre for ten years so , that's a skill , okay uh if we're talking about like skills skills uh, I am I am truly passionate in theatre like


like I, I I I almost wanted to take theatre studies in NUS or something like that but like we all , there is a stereotype that like like the arts like working the arts is not very favourable and, uh you won't earn a lot so I had to pick an alternative but ya


I'm just like very passionate in theatre [orh] I I did like, theatre since primary five all the way to JC year, two j j two lah, I really like acting I think like I think my, close friends will know that I am very passionate in acting like learning about like stage and like


immersing yourself in the character and I think like one thing that I really like about acting is that like I get to step into a new story like a new person shoes and like you really learn a lot because in acting like you need to do a lot of research and there was one one of my most extreme rules was like I had to act as a suicidal person


and so like I had to do a lot of research about like depression and like, why are people even do it how do even how people even step into this rain and, like how do people think when you know they are in uh this state because they don't think like like like us they don't think like normal like people who are okay and they're not depressed and there're a lot of insights that you can learn about and


part of acting is that you are always researching about the extremes because you're not acting as like normal human beings you are acting upon things that aligns with like social issues that are happening right now like


ya I I love like how theatre tells a story and I learn I love how like I gain new insights through doing something that I like so it's not like I study and I gain insights I get to act and gain insights at the same time, so it's like I learn stuff and I learn stuff through something that I like doing


that's why I'm I'm really passionate about it, even like until now, ya I can talk about it for hours ah just saying but, well we only got like, oh shit we got five oh we got five seconds oh no okay never mind ha !oops!


(ppl)


part one finance, yes


(hmm)


ya I mean it sounds like all this uh knowledge about finance requires a lot of uh research into the method right so would you say that it is risky for us in this young age to be doing such things


uh ya do you think you have friends that have are too ambitious in investing right now


ya I think like for me cause uh for the guys we have national service right


so that was the time where we had certain cash flow and we started to learn about finance and investing and among some of my friends they look into, into investing as sort sort of a uh get rich quick kind of scheme and because they were so enticed with


money I feel like they wasted their money because they didn't educate themselves properly on investments because investments there're like many different categories from like growth or, growth investing and dividends and there's all this terminology that you have to learn and if you do not educate yourself properly you might risk just wasting that five hundred dollars that you invest


so I feel like generally most youth youths today they get very ambitious with the their money and they buy into schemes, that at uh ya


ya so actually for for maybe our age demographic like students maybe you don't have such a steady cash flow cause we mainly do like adhocs right so how would you say you spend your money


like what kind of expenditure do you spend on like


do you feel like guilty when you spend on yourself <P2>nandini</P2> like what what are the range of the things that you spend on, cause personally for me like oh you say first


okay so for me I feel like I love to spend on gadgets and IT related stuff, cause I I guess that's my personal interest and I also have interest in gaming so usually I will purchase, I'll purchase like app like games on steam and usually it'll cost around fifty to seventy five and me and my friends we have a PS four so I I spend on that also so like that take that took quite an that was quite an


expenditure I would say for the fun especially when we have free time right so, most of my free time is spent uh using this gaming, platforms ah which cause a which caused quite a bit of money so I would say that, perhaps I've been spending a bit too much on that but mainly I also because right now uh during especially during that national service phase we like a lot of the or at least among my groups of friends we start learning about finance and about saving money


so that was a time where I learn how to really divide like for example if I were like for national service we got around five hundred dollars a month and I tried my best, to save at least half of it like and and make sure to really manage how uh how much I spend on food how much I spend on clothing that kind of thing so I guess that was like a period where I started to learn how how my expenditure is justified lah


ya okay generally for me I feel like I will splurge a bit on certain things every year or every half a year I'll try to get be it uh clothing or uh IT uh like gadgets ah


ya so at least so the rest of the month because I am not earning a steady income now, I try to make sure that the expenditure is mainly focused on travel or , on food when I'm outside so that's how like I try to justify my savings because I currently


you know we we don't have like a such a steady income to play so much uh capital ya so how what what do you spend on mainly


, do you think people generally spend too much on this kind of luxury products like for example like the latest shoe drops then after that they want to spend too much on something that they want


ya, actually that's quite interesting because what do you think of people who they work hard and they work a lot and they have like a decent income as a student they have a decent income but then they also spend a lot so what do you think of that


so you think that they as, uh even though they work hard and they work a lot they should always keep in mind that


they should always have some savings at at the side lah so basically even though they earn a lot they shouldn't be spending too much is that what you think


so actually that was interesting when you said about COVID right so how did your your expenditure and savings change when COVID happen, cause personally for me right I feel like when COVID happen


it was quite of a a bit of a blessing to me because I start to eat from home a lot and I start to stay at home a lot so uh most of my food expenditure like dropped drastically ya so like it was uh it was a good period of time where I started to spend less


ya generally I actually during this COVID period also there are a lot of offers and a lot of sales I think companies are trying to entice people to buy right so


uh actually it was only last month when I started to spend a bit more than usual because there were a lot of sales and I find that !wah! might might as well get some of these uh products because they are on sale right so so that was how like that was how I did it lah what about you


oh, ya


so, you would like to keep your expenditure constant lah so you justify at yourself sometimes that,


so do you have like a set amount that you must save or like must spend this year each month cause it sounds like that is your ah


okay because for me uh personally right I will have like for me I have two bank accounts, that I set up one is mainly for savings and that's like a uh my POSB savings account and my other one is uh my UOB account which I uh use for spending so for me I will have like


a bank account just for spending bank account just for saving so when I have an income in the month our split it up according to like proportion how much I think I can spend and how much I think I should save lead the month, so that way I have like a clear view of how to how much I have like how much money I can allow myself to spend and how much I've already saved it kind of like force me to save in a way because it's it's like a visual way where I can see oh I only have this amount for this month


so this like I can plan it out a bit more ya because uh I learned from uh the, I learned from the times when I was in national service where I only had one bank account right and they give me the income I realised that I tend to overspend because


I was not disciplined enough to let's say set five hundred site and only spend like two hundred dollars I needed to be able to visually see that I only had like two hundred dollars left and these two hundred dollars is the amount that I can spend something like that, ya that was like my way of how I learn how to manage my finance


so you wrote down like the things that you wanted to spend on is it,


so actually what one financial advise that you give to yourself five years ago or like few years ago few years back, okay maybe not five years or like three years


okay for me like I cause that that two bank account thing right it came after a year of NS ya so it was like a year of income and then I started to really learn how to save, so I wish that I did that earlier what


it's not that recent like it's been a few years but like basically on my second year of NS then I started to make the importants ah basically I dwelve too much, and I overspend on the first year and I think that's normal because like for people who first time got income right they tend to be a bit more excited like oh I can start to buy this I can start to buy that


oh is that what happened to you,


, it takes time for us to learn lah I guess


it's okay, relatable ah ya


(mmhmm)


uh independent, is that is that like do you feel like pressure for that or like do you think it's okay for students to actually rely on their parents cause currently technically we are not, like suppose we're not supposed to have an income like we should be focusing on our studies right what do you think of that


do you think there's enough financial uh help out there for people of lower financial background


ya from the government ya do you think it's sufficient cause, I feel like I think for now is not too bad lah like I still have like the bursary they give me enough for my food expenditure like all I have to do is work a bit more part time like uh it's more of a top up


ya so like it is still not too bad lah for people with lower financial background generally speaking for me, ya and also it also like incentivise us to work hard to get scholarship to if we are really like uh if we really want it right if we really want to support our parents then we work hard to get the scholarship it's a it's a quite a nice incentive I would say


part three negative experience, (hmm), so what is like the first time you ever felt like this kind of extreme sadness


in your life or like extreme anger you know, like as far as you can think, I can I think I can share a bit so there was this time


in my life where I had a bit of passion towards drawing comics so like I love to draw like uh stickman comics okay and like I so I had this like journal


or this book filled with stickman drawing that I like uh basically like almost one whole book of it okay and it was like dumb dumb-like plots like basically two stickman they come and then they like fight with the sword and then after that like, one of them died something like that it was like in primary school lah I used to love that ya then uh there was one time where my father was extremely uh pissed off I think and he basically like ripped apart my comic book


for like I guess it was an expression of just has like I just he just had to like like he was just angry at me and as a punishment he did that so I was like like why like he didn't have to do that at all like he could just scolded me and then like you know but why he had to like


do that so I think because of the experience right I was like , nowadays maybe like I feel like perhaps I have lost that passion a bit like it was a bit of like you know like I wanted to do like art and I wanted to maybe like a bit of comics related like drawing in general but maybe because of the experience it was like


ya I reflecting or pick on it now like it was like he didn't, he didn't have to do that and it kind of like killed my ya because after after that day obviously I didn't as a young child I didn't dare to draw anymore comics lah so it was like an unjustified scolding that like I still remember until today


ya, I mean I don't I don't even think about it because like it kind of died down because of that experience, ya what about you, (mmhmm)


was it just based on like a financial aspect or was it the acting itself they find it to be bad


, do they view acting as like something bad


was it because of the suicide character in particular


do do you think you have changed like like even though you felt like that was like bad right but you still acknowledge that


it was you that had that passion do you think like you'll be able to change like like your love your theatre did it died died like did it really like died died


(mmhmm)


do you think like it was because they didn't really care for what you felt like they didn't care about your passion is it,


that's ya I mean like that's I think it's quite quite common in life in general that sometimes our financial uh like our financial goals don't align with our what kind of job you want to do and it like it's common for like a lot of people actually that they work jobs that they


feel like they regret in the future right, ya man but I guess that's just the reality of life, oh, I guess


so what uh okay uh I mean this might be a bit weird but what kind of person do you hate the most, , okay I will share a bit of mine while you think


okay personally like I've a several experience as in my life where people who appeared pious, were actually not resembling their piety so like they will they claim to be pious but they don't show it in their attitude and they don't show it in their like their behaviour like may they may show it in terms of like visual


and I think is common in certain groups okay not not common ah but like is in certain groups or in society certain religions in society can be a bit common, and I hate I I absolutely like despise this and like I find that I can control my anger in many


I can control my anger and my emotions in many circumstances but if I ever sees a things like this I will I find it like I very hard to control lah my emotions like for example even it's a bit dumb but like have you seen the uh story nur on suria


did not okay there was this one character that played the hypocrite role and I, ya and I was like I I for some reason I absolutely hated him like his character and I realise that the reason why I hated that person wasn't like it was because of the characters that he portrayed as a hypocrite


ya so like I find I find like there's like something I like is to me is like unforgivable that some people out there who they know what is good and bad they know what is they know the distinction between good and bad yet they purposely choose to bad out of like arrogance


out of arrogance and out of like their ego and they burden upon others like ya to me like that's like unacceptable behaviour because it portrays like an image which is not which is not the same as what their their religion or their


cultural like portrays like their culture or region portrays it to be a good place right but these are the people who like they're the bad fruits that degrade the whole image, ya and I I find it like it's because of these people and sometimes they are influential that they tend to push people away from what is good


and ya so like I think I am scared because like I feel like I I cannot control it might it might be that I cannot control myself, ya I don't know how to approach it with wisdom when trying to advise this kind of people in my life like it feels like I want to be harsh with them whenever I meet this kind of people


ya, ya but I think like to convince this kind of people it takes like a lot of wisdom on how you approach them because you cannot appear too aggressive also ya


, what also what kind of like people do you what kind of characteristics in people that you hate or despise


ya,


ya (mmhmm)


I mean like if you think about it arrogance is really like the stem of a lot of problems like even in especially in society like things like racism is is is due to the fact that they they think that they are better than others just because of the way they're born right


ya


perspective


damn I mean have you ended like friendships because or like relationships because of people who have this kind of character, like outright just


do that lah, sounds like you are helpless ah like okay helpless to help them a bit and also like


, (mmhmm)


at least equal lah right


I mean personally I I myself feel like I will never and friendships with people but I will definitely like ya, in my life I've never ended any friendship before


ya but I have definitely like distance myself from people, like ending means that I even if they contact me I won't contact them but for me I feel like I I won't do that lah because I wouldn't want that to happen to me in case in a point in time where I was misguided or like lost


or like you know I was a bit arrogant and then some person just completely cut me off because okay actually because right there is someone in my life who did that to me and like after reflecting on it now it was


what I did was to an extent bad like it was a group of of us lah and what we did was bad but it didn't warrant like an end of friendship it was because like the group of us were going through something hard, and we were try we were kind of like spewing out negativity


and that person decided that we were toxic people and they just like that person cut me off in in in her life ah so I was like why sia like I mean like when if you like now I have like


like I was just going through like a hard time in the past, and then like I was being a bit bad lah but I was there for you when you were going through a hard time why is it when I went through a hard time you were not there for me you know so like I personally don't believe in like ending friendships cause


I find that everyone deserves a bit of redemption, likes ya but definitely like because uh that kind of thing can really cause a lot of hurt to people lah and it might like I felt I don't know why but I mean she wasn't like the most close the person that I was most closed with in my life


but it still really affected me that she viewed me to be that kind of like with disgust but you know I didn't do something that bad and even if after discussing it with my friends it wasn't that bad but ya that was that was hard to deal with ah


part, part two positive experience, , okay so what do you love about life actually


what, really as it makes it like a bit more exciting I guess that you don't know what's happening right


really ah okay okay I mean what I love about life I feel like uh it's interesting, ah I feel like there's a lot of like it's a bit funny like how sometimes when we go through like some hard times


there's actually like some good things that will happen after that so it's always like a up and down there is never like a constant down is always up and down so I'm always look I love how like there's, that I will that I know that if I'm going through something hard, I know it won't be forever


like I like there's basically there's light at the end of the tunnel every time I see and currently like ya currently like in the place like I am in my life is like, I'm just like I don't have to worry too much about adulting yet I guess like hard adulting uh like I've just to I've just to focus on my studies right right now ya so it's like it's still quite chill it's quite relax to meeting new people meeting new friends


enjoying a bit so I think this like is fun ah it's quite fun currently, ya man


actually honestly what I'm thankful for is really that the basic state the basic things in life like I've sometimes I feel like you know when I look at people likes uh other people in life, and I look at myself and I see that I have like a lot of blessings that I that I have like for example as simple as like just a healthy body


like the fact that I have a healthy body I have nothing like I have no sickness is something that is so called basic for people but I find it like such a big blessing that I don't have anything wrong with me or in within my family you know I have like two parents


like I've I've siblings like you know it is still like even though we have like our problems sometimes you know but I would say relatively we are quite normal in a sense and to me that's like one of the greatest blessings is to have just basic things ah like a roof over our heads


ya and like good food and once in a while we can splurge on nice food you know decent clothing we're not like the richest or we're not poorest but the fact that it's average I'm extremely thankful for that, ya so what about you,


ya ya ya like ah what's so special about this right


, that


, that's good man it sounds damn nice


!wah! (hmm) that's good what are some like memorable things that happened to you in your past maybe like maybe when you were a kid


okay okay I share with you one okay I want to share with you like there was this time in my kindergarten right I was playing catching with my friend okay , no no no okay so like I was chasing my cousin (ppc)


ya I was chasing my cousin , and then I I ran and then she was ya she was running in front of me and in front of her was a wall so she sidestep like she suddenly changed direction and I didn't so I ran into a wall,


ya ya that's me man then I went to the hospital and like I got a scar, really you heard from where oh you never heard okay kay kay , I mean you know it was painful in the past but you know it's quite funny now


ya it left a permanent mark ah not I mean I'm not going to show you but there's a little there's a little bit of a mark on my head, ah, it ya it's always catching


(uh huh), oh no bounce oh no


but it's not ah oh it's still there oh okay okay, , I mean that those were simpler times lah I love it though


, I mean my JC days it was a lot of it was difficult but I love how like, like I think I find my JC friends to be the to be like very close like I'm very close to my JC friends because of


ya up to today because we are like we went through like quite a bit ah it was very difficult to balance our studies and the pressure of you know because I feel like the JC system it was like you you have to make it lah if not you wasted your life right you you wasted


two years of your life oh man ya so like, what uh what came from that was a very like fruitful friendship that until today even though I may not talk to them as often, like I guess they are like sort of like low maintenance friendship but in a good way like the fact that I don't have to meet them yet I know that they if I ever needed them I can always rely on them


like if I needed them or they needed me like I have that support structure there that is ya and it's like it's a bit nice that we all have this understanding that even though we are busy but we can meet sometimes and it will still not like ditch


deteriorate our friendship like it won't reduce our friendship just because we don't meet out that often, what about you


(mmhmm), (mmhmm)


ya it's quite I think cause ya because like we work like just because because we've been through each with each other during like hard times perhaps like it like really strengthen and that relationship ah we have


, (mmhmm)


(mmhmm) accept each other, that's good lah it sounds like healthy like healthy friendship okay you talk about how like you grew a lot right from JC so what are the things that you like what's your what are some like personal growth that you can share


, okay,


I don't think there's too that's not not too bad lah like it's important to put yourself first what like sometimes you have to take care of yourself first,


, ya


, , okay lah


no lah it's fine lah I mean , I mean I mean it sounds like you went through quite a lot lah in JC and you really did a lot of like self reflection is it


(mmhmm), it's okay lah you're fine lah , it's fine I mean


I mean I think there's a point of time where like most guys in general reflect cause they literally got too much time with their life lah they just they just, Kena whack over there then ya so it like for me personally I learned a lot about how people work in NS and that was like a huge personal growth for me like


I took I took it upon myself to really learn how other people work like I heard this phrase uh before it was to, to learn a wise man eh no a smart person learns learns from their own mistake but a wise man learns from another person's like other people's mistakes


so like I realised that at that point if I wanted to grow more in my life if I wanted to understand people I have to put myself in their shoe to really empathise with them and it was great because the position that I had in my national service


it allowed me to talk to many many different kinds of people like I had to interact with like batches upon batches of people, so with like a few hundred people I have to talk to a lot I have to like really talk, to a lot different kind of people I learn how different people of


different socio economic background different stages in life how they work and operate and from there I really learn how to not to see people very uh, basic ah like sometimes we might think if someone does something bad we might think that that person is a bad person but it may be that their circumstance like


like their circumstance led them to that decision like for example if you know the one of the CEOs of eighteen chef you know that guy the bald guy, ya so he was like sharing about how in his life, he was born in a family where , he that family was drug like it was like uh trafficking drugs okay so like he also did a bit of that and he did a bit of drugs also so you might think that you know oh this guy is a bad person but in actuality you know it was the circumstances that he was


given like and then after that he changed to be a better person and after he did his time in prison he set up a business for eighteen chef and he he started to hire people from prison like with records so to make sure that they have employment opportunities


so like when I read that right it really like and I reflect on it it really changes my perspective on literally everyone that I meet that sometimes really first impression sometimes do not matter, actually like you might think this person might be a bad person but we have to think good of them at sometimes it may be the circumstances that they were dealt with in the past or something is happening in their life right now that we do not understand


so that was like !wah! when I realise this it just like changed my perspective a lot on people lah in general and it gave me like a more positive aspects towards approaching everybody, ya and ya that was like that was quite a inside ah that I gained during NS


ya so like I I guess that's like a bit of a skill that I learn uh when I was there so that is like a secret skill that I I have lah I guess that sometimes I really try to understand because I understand people do you have like any weird skills that you have


, or like talents ah what kind of talents do you have actually, (ppc) (hmm)


, , it sounds like you have a damn passionate in theatre


(uh huh) (uh huh), alright


is it something in theatre that really like excites you,


so do you you love the the way theatre like tells a story towards the people that are looking,


!wow! even until now , okay kay kay kay relax ,


okay recording, red colour, ya ya ya only one


part one finance


uh how you find their bank interest


uh what do you think about their debit card is it useful


but the debit card also there's salaries right so say we lost our card or what and then we can't remember we lost the card and then somebody can go and use our card and uh draw I mean can use up the card but isn't it's not so safe also I find it


ya but then uh okay the one uh regarding the saving plan their interest is very low so we got a lot of money to keep ya it it is good it works like a saving every month we can put something but that one we can even go through some other insurance we put in our interest is much better like three percent


okay what do you think about joint account


but then if uh sometime is like they want we want to draw certain amount both of us have to be around to sign uh certain things the that's another problem also we have lah but then ATM ya either one of us can use the ATM card but when we


go to the direct to the bank sometime they don't allow one person they need both of us to be around that's another problem also right


it, so what do you think about uh the insurance the banks are offering uh do you think it's good to get the insurance by through our bank


ya it's it's true I got my own experience when the time I sold my house I got a bit lump sum of money so I bank in to my account but the returns was very less so I decided to draw it out and invest on other investment which uh I got a better returns


so I think sometimes also we think bank is safe ya I know it's a certain amount we got insured but then we think about our whole lump sum stuck there and then the money the interest is not much we will we advisable to take it out and we can do other safe investment do you think is okay


ya but then they also got some other problem like okay you're a retired then you want to take a bank loan or anything they don't recognize that which I feel very unfair ah because even though we've got some money with you and maybe you don't want to use up that money you want to do some bank loans so that monthly you can pay back


but they don't allow us to take do you think it's fair to us


okay like which bank do you think is the best if we go to bank for saving okay which bank do you think is the best for now


okay what do you think a child a a child we should give a uh ATM card for say like


ah I got a daughter she's thirteen years old now when should I give her a ATM card and help her to run a own finance like control her own money uh uh own uh like I give her one month certain allowance or saving and let her handle the money what age do you think is advisable


okay okay uh I like to share my experience I got a fixed deposit with uh can I uh with maybank okay yes but one thing is very interesting before my money I was dumping my money


they pay me my interest isn't it interesting, that means okay say I put in thirty k okay thirty k but they pay me the interest around thousand eight before in end, what do you think about that isn't it interesting sometimes we attempted because okay maybe you need to use


ya ya but you see is very good why okay you got thousand eight with your hand you can buy uh another investment say uh monthly saving say uh hundred and fifty or two hundred you can put in


for within a year you got some money to top up from this money you are doing another investment so you are you're you're making your money grow in two ways also okay you put it on fixed deposit for two years, okay this way I'm getting some cashback and then the next one the cashback I'm flowing to buy an insurance uh insurance maybe uh for my child


for myself is to be higher so for my child will be less so uh around hundred and fifty so I roll in the money so another two years time I'll have another refund from the maybank and then I still have another cashback from my insurance don't you think it's quite


uh reasonable uh you can make your cash flow without touching your saving try to use the interest rate to rotate again


ya what do you think about investing on stocks


do you know anything about unit trust


okay so uh at end of the day you think is best to invest in bank or to buy insurance or to invest on stock market what do you think the best for your experience


so in if it's you say necessary okay uh which bank we choose to is it good we go to each bank and try to get more information or how to go about uh to get the best thing out of the which bank how how we have to go down and interview talk to them


okay so what about the uh nowadays we use the cashless, uh like uh paynow uh our bills are paid by online what do you think about that it's very good right


if I have a okay say if you have a big rainfall what kind of investment or what you want to put it in your saving your money don't grow so much uh what kind of investment is advisable


just say we got a suddenly a good or big lump sum of money, what to do with that money I just ask your advice


okay so uh if we want to improve our income level okay so we got a lump sum like me elderlies who are like retired so it's good to put in a different kind like myself , I invested in insurance and I do invest in some stock market and I think that we we should have different kind of sources where the money can come in rather than just keeping it uh just like it doesn't grow it just save in one corner


so if you are those youngsters okay uh the advice is like say every month what is affordable say two hundred per month okay if you put in for two hundred per month ten years time you can see lump sum but if it is in the bank your chances are you're drawing it up drawing out is very high


but if you put it in an insurance or in a uh endowment something like that you uh like retirement scheme will after ten years you take back some money nowadays a lot of youngsters uh uh independent workers that means they don't have CPF and all that so it's good to go for a saving


for uh five years then you take one lump sum then the same money you rotate again isn't it very good idea


ya but I still uh believe that uh I did do investment with my child monthly and paying two hundred two years after two years I will start getting some returns around thousand six hundred , and if the thousand six I can invest in other things or I can just leave it there which will run with a three percent interest after long run I will get a good return or I take out the thousand six and I can do other investment like now my when I reaching my sixty five on march


I'll be getting a five hundred, uh five hundred to six hundred uh monthly so this money if I can do for a investment I think is advisable also right rather than I just keep the money uh I want my money to grow because I'm uh we are getting old we need to


uh after something happen to us we want my my daughter must be safe all this I think so that's why I went to do the plan uh every month around two hundred dollars a saving which is quite affordable , whenever we do a saving we have to see whether we are affordable no point you'll save the money halfway you cannot afford it then all go to burn you see


the price [ah] price [ah]


part three negative experience


ya for me is like uh when I was around fifty one , I was thinking that's the time I going to retire my husband going to retire and then we going to have a good life uh will to going around the world and all that but then there came uh my girl three years old uh the mother send to me then after


that she didn't come back then I to the take this responsibility here, uh against a lot of people they say uh why are you going through this at this age because my kids were around thirty plus both of them what I was going through a reshuffle of life like uh really uh to take care of baby uh three years old


uh uh I mean uh baby around three years old I have to sacrifice a lot of things in my life my expenditure my going out uh spending time with uh my friends uh


everything I have to sacrifice I have to be in the school when she was in primary one, she need me then because if I'm not there she's like very scared and worried about something so I joined the parents support group just to be there with her whenever she come for recess time or for other classes and all that she see me there and she feel happy


so after few years uh there is the father of her sending me a summon asking me to go to court that is when my husband retired and we were planning a holiday in hong kong uh we already prepared to go for holiday then I received this summon saying that I have to be in court the very next day


then I was like panic and I was so worried I don't know what to do so I straight away rush for a lawyer then I have to pay one lump sum to the lawyer and then the lawyer advise me say okay we will write a letter to the


court say that you are away and then we will reconsider after you are back from your holiday , so I went through a lot of puzzle for this girl of mine, and then when PSLE uh the father again sent me a second summon and then I have to go to court and then she uh PSLE was a bit stressful and then my husband was uh going to surgery and all that so I feel the whole world is going upside down


that is where I I feel I need counseling there's a time that I feel that I need to take my life like that that I'm so stuck I don't lose this girl I'm going through a lot of stress I even feel like I don't want to be here anymore I just want to go out of this world


and then one minute I realized that if I'm gone who's going to take care of this girl what will happen to her life if her father take her back, and this is not my biological family or anything is just a friend of my son and I just feel like I want to take care of her I feel like


she is part of my family and a lot of people were against it they say oh you will get hurt will a hundred percent will go back to her biological father and they just uh relatives and friends were mocking at me they say why should you take her


it's not necessary all these but I was only going what my heart say I followed my heart, and I went through a lot of problem and I overcome all that, and I now I'm happy with her is in sec two now, and she is a


quite okay now I got my son which still at Ma there so if anything going to happen to me still somebody else to take care of her, and I was very angry with the reason once she was uh sick I brought her to hospital


there is where I was very very angry I got the guardian letter with me but they say I cannot use my medisave to pay for my, adopted girl they say I have to pay cash I don't understand why as there is a letter of guardian the parents don't want to take care their kids


and they just dump the children to us and we as a guardian want to take care of the kid want to do the best for the kid why is our side our I'm sorry to say our government is not supporting the adopted parent recently even the grant they help to support the three hundred dollar


the biological parents, they are not doing anything for the kid but the parents get the money and the government forget about the guardians what happen to the guardians who are supporting the girl from small, why is it the government not doing any help, against I mean help us for taking care the kid something like that like that amount they're giving they are only there's there there there is loophole they forget about the guardian totally what is the reason I don't know


that is the part I'm very angry because we are not appreciated we are and we are not asking to give a medal to give a kind of thing but our government should take into consideration that the guardian, also play a important part and they have to look into this problem this is where I feel very angry and I feel we can overcome this problem very soon


and whenever I go down he's happy okay he will call me anytime okay I need to go here need to go there I I followed her everywhere then this one final day she fell and then she was admitted in hospital that is the time when my husband also went for surgery


but I did visit her once or twice but she was not happy, uh that if I cannot go everyday to visit about her but her family was there when he was admitted the family was there so I was thinking okay since the family is there they are there to help her around so I have to take care of my own husband so I just so after she discharge uh


uh when I call her she don't want to pick up my phone and all that so I was feeling very sad because all the way, for nearly one year I have been helping her with everything I don't I didn't want any appreciation or anything else but at least uh she should know my problem


and then she should have looked into it but then never mind she's also old so never mind I just realize okay it's okay never mind but for me once in a while I still call her ask her how is she getting along and everything , so the that is uh something and he did complain to Sinda about me that's the most embarrassing part of me I feel very embarrassed because I've been doing my part


do my best for her and end of the day she go and complain to uh my Sinda uh those uh social workers, but they my social worker was quite uh kind enough and they know uh what is she up to and they say never mind it's okay uh just do your part that's all they said then I say okay but then I still feel a bit embarrassed and I feel uh what I've been doing


paid backfired me that's what I feel my uh dream my hopes uh I putting is now my girl and if after I gone I hope my son and my daughter now will help to, if they care for her and I'm fine to live day by day just do what we have to do and that focus on what make us happy bottom line is what make you happy just go and do it uh a lot of negative things are on the way on the road we meet


uh so many thing we feel angry and all that but then I think we should just , uh start to live day by day just do what we have to do that's all


I also feel that two thousand twelve my father passed away uh that is a first uh bigger lost in my life because uh I that's my first loss that mean I lost my father in uh two thousand twelve


but uh he live a fulfilled life he was in ninety ninety four years old and he was not because of illness anything he was quite healthy and just had acute attack that moment and he pass away that moment all the while he was very active hockey and all that


but after he passed away I feel, uh for I feel more for my siblings, uh they were very close with my mum so I feel that moment that okay now my father has passed away which we endure the situation how if anything going to happen to my mom how I going to


endure the situation with my siblings and I slowly start to talk to my sister everything and then I told them wherever we are very close very lovey one day when our time come we have to go but bottom line is


uh their memories they left behind for us and we always keep them in our prayers, and keep moving and we have to accept the fact that, everyone will be gone one day that's what I've taught my daughter and she quite mature enough she say mummy everybody have to die one day so it's just a matter of time and I'm also


have prepared my brother and sisters for that so now they're all like a bit more stable in all this so the my father's uh loss is the biggest loss in my life, and other than that I think our life we have to keep moving and we have to


face whatever come in our life all kind of negative things positive things you have to face


part two positive experience


okay I like to share with you I had the experience when I just got my new house, uh I need to do some renovation and all that and we totally did not have any money and there is my husband friend who came to help so we borrowed a


few thousand dollars from him it is uh very kind of him he lent the money to us and we take our time to settle in uh that was my only experience I had my financial problem time uh in nineteen eighty five


I had this problem and the person who came and help I still remember him I'm very grateful to him, so uh but other than that I think for nowadays I don't think anybody is so kind enough to help without any benefit for them


that's what I feel what do you feel rusno


okay so uh you remember the pan pacific hotel where we went for a dinner for your #ah ne# birthday that was a good meal right down there you had a good time there


that was the best I think even though we are going now on and off to a lot of seafood and all that but I still remember that, pan pacific uh was the most uh experience was very good and the food was very good also


ya it was really uh five star style lah I was uh enjoying it lah in fact uh, uh what is uh I gave a surprise gift to, most of my children have a surprise gift lah all that will be


within my affordable price I think they are happy about the gift whatever I give them sometime is a bicycle sometimes is a , ring chain uh anything like that


uh and that the surprise even is I was waiting to attend was my two boys wedding, and uh that was I was just waiting to have them get married off and it was my happy event


and, and there's something that also matter for me is my kids my family, and I'm happy to be with them what about you reginal


oh okay well I like to share with my uh my experience uh there was this elderly person who need help and I went all the way to a place to see her to meet her she was very lonely when I meet her uh I feel


what is it to be when you're old there's, nobody around she she do have a family but nobody is with her now she's in a rental flat so I went and or on and off I go and visit her, and I feel like she's very sad she always cry to me that she miss her children one of the son passed away one is in the prison so she feel like very sad


and when I see her I just hope I, I do not want to be like her when I grow old I feel like I want to be with my kids with my family at least in the touching distance where I can just call them like my younger son is uh staying nearby anything I can call them for help and all that so it is very