ya ya yes


ya working in this kind of environment I feel is very unhealthy is very unhealthy, you will be dragging yourself to work every day because you don't find it like so you know we want an environment work area which is good for everybody of course there's uh there's a downside of it I mean like if you work I mean in discussion there's an argument okay that one is very common but


I feel that in this case right is like I'm not so sure whether should I say is uh attacking personally, or I don't know I mean, ya ya is this is not uh I should say this is not a good lah I mean


well anyways ya it is best to just move on rather than you stay there ya you'll be like you will you you'll be clouded with stress you and depress and which is not healthy for you yourself ya


ya true yes correct


so like for me if I'm too stress yes I admit sometimes I just sit in sit in toilet and then I will just think oh I'm already at the end of the line so what , I only what what can I do is just I just sit down and just cry I mean it's okay for you to cry to at least release yourself rather than you keep it and then is really hard you know it's really hard and makes you feels that you can't breathe at all


so ya I I you know or sometimes I wish that if I was if I if happen to be I'm so stressed up right so if I just walk around the park I feel like screaming out, but I can't lah because otherwise people will think that eh this madam crazy you know so I just like oh okay so that is why I always had my headphone and earpiece


if I'm stressed I always listen to uh alternative music I mean rock music lah, you know to just like you know at the same time inside me also screaming or maybe I listen to the song you know okay lah I sometimes I feel tears at my eyes it is when I was travelling to work in the MRT but try to control it but for me I feel that is how I just release myself


you know just listening to music so ya so I feel that music really helps me when I'm down and then as I said again I love zumba right so that's how I release my energy I mean release my negative energy like you know okay uh all out otherwise uh ya you know


that is how I release my stress you know to not to think so much ya or maybe you know ya I did cry sometimes in the toilet I can't do much you know this is how much I can you know, like ya so just ya that's the only way


to make myself work again ya to think to make myself think of a way to find a way how to you know to overcome this and like (ugh) so what should I do if I keep on just keep quiet and then just follow with my feelings oh my god I think


I'm in a big trouble my family also will be in big trouble you know because uh yes so I I don't want I don't want to go there I don't want to go there that is really not healthy it will really ruin yourself, so just find a way how to release it so that is how I find my way that's why I always had a phone until my work my colleague also say !wow! you are really like !wah! you really ah can really say oh ya but they do not know that's a is my way of you know how to like to make myself at ease


when I'm so really deeply stressed ya, ya I do I do but uh ya but


I I just feel helpless I just don't know what to do at times, so ya that's the part whereby if I'm at home and nobody's around you know like your guys went out to work or something so I just like you know go to the room I just keep quiet if it's like too overwhelming right so I just sit in the toilet


then just cry it out lah just cry it out


(ppc)


ya ya your good friend your good friend


yes I I can I can understand I can understand how that's feel ya


ah yes until now I still remember him ya, is very sad actually because all of us are out okay he was sick I know when when all of us are out and working then that time I think you all still schooling right


ya ya, so is quite sad when I reach home he was I thought he's sleeping you know so when I touch him oh his cold so eh eh eh I I'm very sad I missed him ah ya jack jack really ya


ya because at that point of time we have no one for help and we just don't know what to do but we did the best we covered him nicely, and then with those uh yup and you know ya we did send him away I mean ya that's the best we can do


yes yes ya correct


ya well she's living a very comfy life ya good for her ya (hmm) yes


ya ah yes yes


yes yes ya ya it is it is ya so yes, well (ugh) ya those are life lah these are


I mean everybody will definitely experience this kind of life no matter wherever you are so, ya so that's how I mean ya especially now at the COVID nineteen


you can see happening when no jobs this and that you know is really stress is really stress ya yes


yes yes correct correct


definitely every moment actually but , how will I say this ya I mean as you know I'm the, I'm trying to keep this family I'm going I mean alive I mean like you know trying to do the best what I can but on the other hand there's this uh for this person I just don't know what


is he doing you know is like not only for this time period but it's been like for so many years, and I just don't like the kind of person who always break the promises always say this say that but there's no action taken that really really makes me angry piss me off easily like I have to do everything


you know and what I mean is part of the responsibility isn't it so, ya it's really not fair I'm ya I'm too stressed about it so that's why you know I try not, to you know like uh


too deeply emotional I mean I can't I I I don't deny that I'm very stressed and I think I'm almost like deep deep down to depression but I'm trying my best to keep alive to keep afloat for the family and for the children especially so, ya so that's why whenever you stress I just whenever I'm stressed I just let it out I just don't care


you know like you know, you know as what I say go to the toilet and just crying my heart out or you know when I'm walk out I will just listen to very loud music I just don't care until my colleague say eh you on your headphone so loud ya I just don't care you know, so ya so trying my best here to survive really to survive ya


yes yes yes correct


part two positive experience


okay Latifah what is the small things that makes you smile


yes okay , okay likewise uh for me is my kids when they are gathered together in the living room having the uh dinner , then you can see everybody together regardless the age gap between them


and then they will start uh talking and then they will start fighting and then my son will start raising his voice but those are little things that makes me smile it's very heartwarming to see your children together at home


you know as we all so busy with our daily life going to school going to work come back from work and having dinner and then after that oh up time's up for, for uh bedtime so these are the small things that I really appreciate most in life you know you can hardly see as a family to sit down together you know


ya and by the end of the day family family always comes first no matter what family will always be there this is what I I I think and I believe in lah so I'm trying my best to keep everything everybody altogether because by end of the day you will see yourself that you know


ah ya you know like oh it's nice to see everybody together you know whereby , ya and then we do sometimes go and see movies uh bring the little ones go and see movies especially animated movies you know ya ya


yes correct


yes yes where yes if you have your best ya I agree because certain things you don't feel comfortable or it's hard for you to like open up with your family or you know maybe you want to get some point of view so ya I do have a


couple of friends which is uh a good friend of me you know sometimes we share we share our things but uh ya that's one thing ah I mean uh of course the good friends of course you keep so the bad ones I mean you can still be friends doesn't mean that you cannot be friends but


you know at all those uh you know you just try to not to be like you know, I mean to to see in different way lah ya ya so ya yes ya we also at times at same my at my workplace know me and my this another two friends ya we also like you know


ya lah it's nice to have them ya I I like to be friends with them ya apart from the family at least you have some space on your time with your friends you know ya, , yes oh you know,


that's that's why that's why that's why I sign up for zumba that's the only way for me to express out, seriously because I love to dance okay, so that's why that's how I express out


express out my you know uh like if if I'm too stressful I will or those negative negativity in me so I will just like you know like okay just it's I find it quite relaxing though at the same time you know help you to be more healthy to maintain cause I I I need I need a lot of energy


to you know to run about to handle the younger kids and then I got to go to work then come back go to you know cooking or whatsoever so mentally and physically ya that same volume I can't afford, to fall sleep anyway uh can't afford to fall sick anyway I, so that's why at times I ya ya correct


so that's why sometimes if let's say my friend say !hey! you don't want to you know go for a cup of coffee just relax ya I would love to go, if uh if the time permits if the time permits so that's, you know just relax and drink coffee chit chat chit chat or gossiping whatever you want to do ya so yes and then you know ya that's the way for me to like have my own space


after all the all the you know or after all the hard work, all the stress all the depress or whatsoever so ya ya, exactly exactly


yes


yes yes


yes correct , oh yes definitely definitely that's the best that is the best


ya Osaka, I want to go Osaka no I mean ya we see the pictures especially I want to go to that bamboo park I feel when I ya ya ah ya


#osaka kyoto# or whatever it is lah but I find it is very like !wah! you know I I can feel it with the moment I can visualise lah the moment when you walk down the air the breeze it's like oh !wow! is like so nice so ya , ya trying here trying to to ya trying to plan hopefully the COVID nineteen everything goes well then we can you know put aside uh put our plans together and bring the whole I mean the the whole family to


go there yes, exactly it's like oh my god when I see it it's so nice it's so nice really yes ya I would love to go one day, I would love to go one day ya


yes exactly exactly ya and don't forget the glico man,


it's nice it's nice


oh ya definitely ya that's why I say hopefully ya hopefully with this COVID nineteen everything is all quiet down everything is okay ya ya that's the first priority ya, ya


yes yes definitely, well there's a lot lah actually I mean like especially the younger girls


you know I don't know can't think of right now actually there's a lot ya there's a lot


, ya ya I understand I understand ya


yes actually exercising is good it is good to make you more active then mentally you know you will not be uh you won't be so tired so at least


your energy level is and and you have an energy level inside ya so I guess is is is good lah even for younger age and for older age also is good to have, to have sometimes you can see those uh elderly they sometimes they walk together from one park to one park it's nice to see you know it's really nice


to see is like !wow! you know, you are active and then you won't like feel like you know uh feel like so tired easily that kind of thing


my own achievements, what do I achieve, having four kids , but but having four kids with it's a generation gap okay that is not say my achievement


, eh that's god's willing lah ah so we I mean but okay lah I mean to see I can see the age gap the generation gap and the young eh uh talking about the nowadays generation is so far different compared to back then


where I learned a lot too you know I learned a lot too that that that's good thought that that's good, so at least you know what is going on right now what is happening so at least ya correct,


what, , I know I know I know


ah this is my hard laugh okay ,


but you don't be surprised ya you no no okay one thing that time when was I, uh , uh I'm having a, third baby that time when I go to the KK hospital so, I don't know out of the blue this uh reception counter she's so cute you know and then she made me laugh you know and then that that's good lah part of the positive that she gave it to me then she look at my age then so then after that at out of the blue she just say oh ya before that there was also another lady but she's a bit older than you then I was say what


, ya man so okay I mean she's very nice uh as a customer service counter but she's very nice like she's very funny , , well ya and then I do love that time when we go to DC comic restaurant that was the best also I can see we are all enjoy enjoying ourselves


and then like you know the girls like what oh !wow! you know we too can see the the life uh you know that life statue I don't know whether is that superman or, flash I can't remember so it was, oh batman but it's very nice though ya and then remember that time uh way uh back then we went to have our break fast during the fasting month we had we went to royal plaza ah that was the best time also we all enjoying our food


and then you guys and then I know the brother testing the japanese side I was laughing !whoa! that's the best best part also , ya, , ya we had a good time though we had a good time ya


that's why I was ya the best but right now on top of my list is that will we will bring over like to go to travel that we have a little bit more then we can go japan of course in the first place lah ha so


ya ya ya ya , yes I know what to do what to do , ya I would like to try that smoke barbecue texas house


okay so that that that is, the ah we would like to try that, ya we would like to try we would like to try that ya, ya ya so ya so yes


me me about myself


I have a I am I have a great big endurance and patience which, I'm proud of myself I can endure all, these uh you know whatever nonsense or negativity you know ya I know at at certain times I also have a breakdown but not


uh ya, yes and I can make it ya in fact there's some some my friends my work friends and they will say !hey! you know you're with your age your child will age and then you got still younger ones that during age gap


you know they were like !wah! I really envy you you really you can take it I say ya but you might say too ,


yes yes, uh yes yes oh they do they do they were asking eh you older ones got girlfriend boyfriend I say !hey! uh I'm that kind of mother I no pressure


okay I no pressure I don't pressure I'm not like eh when you ah no but of course you know the the family rules that I, already tell you guys right so okay fine ya I I wouldn't not I don't want to mention it here but you should know yourself so ya no pressure from me I'm still cool I'm a cool mother


, I'm still okay I'm still okay ya so uh the best thing is, the only thing is then you you know you must know how to manage and balance


balance in your life that that's the most important thing ya, yes yes, yes yes yes ya correct true true


happy already very happy very happy, you know ya drinking your starbucks mocha frappe or mcdonald's mocha frappe ya


really cools down ya for for just we meet meet one minute or two then you are oh okay, then you can see your smile on the face , , ya , but overall I'm very grateful to have my family even though I believe every family has their own ups and downs but I'm always thankful and grateful


ya yes ya, everything yes yes


oh uh same goes to me as well uh I do have personal insurance and also hospital insurance as well because I realised at this age is really quite important and


uh ya it also helped me to benefit myself in the future as well, so ya it is is really really important ya


ya that is so true ya uh how about endowment plan do you happen to have that,


uh okay so


ya that's that's what I thought so too because especially for us like uh we rarely travel overseas that's why it's like we don't really find it uh a must to simply get a travel insurance ya


ya, oh uh the uh I I didn't know that about that ya


uh ya oh, okay I didn't know that because usually for this kind of hospitalisation insurance uh, from what I know is that usually the company will actually


and from there they will explain more of the hospitalisation correct ya so and and these items are basically , basic items and individual ya ya


I I believe not only prudential but other insurance company yes especially like, uh AIA ya great eastern so ya


ya that's so true so for for this kind of insurance right do you usually approach a agent or like you find it on yourself or they just come to you you know, ah


ya definitely because like if we went to find it on our own like especially for DIY it will takes uh a lot of documents to be take note of and we might have we might have overlooked at a certain thing ya


, okay so like how's your insurance, agent so far is he or she okay like how how is his characteristics,


ya that's that's great lah same goes to mine as well because usually for insurance agent what I look for is you know that kind of connection that makes me feel trust ya because there's a lot of cases about this insurance agents that uh


just an insurance agent and yet they are not being that trustworthy kind of person so is is quite dangerous and risky lah so like for my insurance agent she always told me that if there's anything that that's going on or is troubling me then


most probably I can go and approach her because she said like uh she gave this kind of scope where, both of us can be friends and ya ya ya, so so, usually like if let's say if you are an insurance agent right what sort of question do you like simply ask like just to put yourself in the shoe


ya that that is really true especially like I can actually understand like the first insurance that we gotten from our agent there's a lot of uncertainties that we are worrying especially like the the amount of money that we need to deposit so is is really like


is there's at first there's no sense of trust because we are not sure how it's, going to be like at the end of the day so as time passes by I think is really great lah to simply have this insurance to cover us from any rainy days ya


ya, so usually like I'm not sure about like the elder generation but the type of insurance that I will feel, that is essential for those people around my age is basically personal insurance and hospitalisation insurance unless if they happen to have a car then they can car or motorcycle then they simply can get vehicle insurance that can cover them


for from any accidents or something like that lah but but for most likely just a basic is best to have personal and hospitalisation because we not sure , what will happen you know just


touch wood lah we would we're not sure what will happen to us you know ya this kind of unforeseen circumstances, ya ya , ya so I'm not sure like for the elder generation I'm not sure what type of


insurance that is great for them because even my insurance agent she advise that it is great for young people to start having a insurance rather at a later age ya so, ya so ya


so like for do you okay for insurance right would you rather like stick to one company or would you rather like expose yourself to several other companies for this kind of matter


, I see, ya ya ya that's that is true


right oh okay, for property insurance is it actually I did for for this past few days I did have a thought of whether I should start having insurance for property like maybe or maybe like have a property investment like because is quite is quite fascinating


ya


ya I think I think is good to have housing insurance because like if you were to see at the most recent cases right a lot of fire cases regarding PMD


like even though we are quite lucky that we didn't have PMD right but we still I mean it's the best lah because we are not sure like whether any of our cooking appliances will like explode ya, ya, ya


because for now for me like I have yet to have a house so house insurance is not, important for me ya unless if I happen to to have a house of my own exactly ya


so ya would you like do would you like how do I put this word would you like to invest something like in terms of financial or what


I see, something like life insurance


right


but okay usually for eldershield it can start from like forty years and above is it,


ya maybe like I might want to consider


exactly exactly this this is what I agree also especially when it comes to hospital insurance because uh what my insurance agent told me is that like the younger you are the more affordable you can afford for those premium uh


hospitalisation insurance which allows you ya, , exactly so is like ya, ya and and also the older we get like we can we can downgrade


the insurance scheme for hospitalisation for example lah, like at first you you you know at this age you you upgrade yourself to those uh private hospitals the private wards et cetera so like as as the older you get you can like start on going to B class or C class you know


so is quite is is quite good lah ya


ya it basically depends because like for me I have yet to fully touch hospital insurance even though I managed to get one for my own so like I'm a bit like unsure of how these uh items will be used especially for medisave and medishield


ya like the most recent like I almost wanted to use medisave is uh for my , wisdom tooth extraction but but I have yet to start ya ya ya , so is like


ya I think that's like the common misconception ya ya correct


something that's affordable ya, ya I think that's why like the government have impose those kind cards ya ya ya


okay part three negative experience


okay like what do you really worry the most


ya


like the perspective lah from each other person like from our side like we thought like she she's doing her best


matured a lot but then from the others like ya she's really doing her best


ya like actually having Dina is quite a a bless I I don't say challenging I feel she's is a blessing ah from her like Dina is a blessing you know so but then


like it's quite upset lah I remember when you told me about the teacher and how the LS educator approach up to the school, like as if we don't know anything so it's like it gives me a clear picture of how , teachers can be like like they can be


easily demotivated easily mean towards kids and you know so so like I think every one of us did experience this kind of teacher that we really hate the most, and ya especially for me lah because like I'm for me like when it comes to math I'm really weak at it I'm really weak in maths so so like the moment when you had a teacher who is


using reverse psychology on you that's where that's it you're you'll be like hate hate you'll be hating that teacher forever, ya so so ya


ya that's true ya


it really quite painful you know to hear these kind of people especially as an educator like because you thought like as a teacher like you should, apart from teaching like you should show a very good example of how caring you are towards your students and not for the sake of money because like ya definitely there're there're there're some lecturers even even in poly or university they only apply to this school to teach just for the sake of money so it's like


like what the heck you know that kind of thing so ya


ya that is so true ya then apart from that is there anything that really brings you down how about work like is there any time when you felt like helpless you know, for me is like I recall during my second during my my time in my second company uh it was a construction company


and it really sucks lah because like you are you're surrounded by people eh I'm not meant to be rude or what lah but some people, who are not really willing to expose themselves and ya just trapped in a group, and and and


the worst part is that like this company has a very high expectations is really crazy with their deadly timelines or whatsoever so it really brings you down to the system and to the extent I got scolded by manager because, I didn't do anything properly right in his eyes where I was like I did


chase around people you know I did like approach the other members asking for their advice and solutions and these are the type of thing that I feel is like why am I getting scolded for nothing when you in fact are not doing anything is is just not fair for me ya


is really too much ya yes, so I don't really quite like this kind of people also like they they think that they can do it just for talking and not like not experiencing things that you know the progress the behind the scenes I was is really quite demoralising sometimes you just want to like


(ugh) you know you want to punch punch these people because like so annoying, and then not only that like the the environment is really quite bad because the project director he was like screaming and shouting you know and it's really bad and it's quite micromanaging as well like you cannot use your phone you know you cannot like


like okay we simply you know there are things that we can use snapshot on our screen and just type it out easily instead of just snapshot from the phone because the company is very high of confidentiality issues right so, anything is like we just need have no choice but to find a loophole somewhere to simply like get the information done like a proper information uh regarding this project which is essential for us


so so it's really bad and and and every second when my PD walk past by there's this very big very bad aura that he's like, the moment he shout your self esteem like immediately drop because like you know that fear within you know so is like is is really bad is really really bad


it feels like is a personal attack you know so is


exactly and ya and also like you know when I talk about this matter to my friends and they asked me why don't you complain you know like I can complain or something, I I told them like I don't believe in revenge I believe in karma so like once karma hits them then ya that's it ya


oh !wow! ya ya


to release your system ya


ya because it's a sign of depression so and and one thing about depression is, ya that's so true


ya that's true is there a time where like things does not meet to your own expectations and then it's like literally disappointed like make you feel disappointed you all the way


is there like any period of time like eh no have you ever experience where you ended a friendship or certain relationship with someone before, because for me like throughout the years of growing up like I did ended few friendships and and it was at first it was really really upsetting because like this friends that I


used to be with like they are the type of friends that I trust them the most however like it take things to another way round where they, use me as their advantage and not really appreciate for all the sacrifice that I made for them so it's really quite upsetting and I feel like is no point for me to just continue to stay there in their life and being upset as always so so it's like


ya it's better that I just go meet other person and just like block them all the way and not talk to them anymore lah ya the most recent was uh #sze xiang# I think I told you before right ya he, ya so I was I was really angry because he made use of me emotionally and at that point of time I was very vulnerable because I just uh broke off relationship with the last guy I dated so


!wah! with this kind of friend I was like oh my god you just feel like a smack in the head and then so, ya and then do you remember jack jack our cat


ya like the moment when he passed away is like oh my god it feels is very very sad ya, ya I was in my final year in ITE


ya I actually had my regret like by not sending him I mean not giving him a proper burial and instead to


we we did say we are sorry lah because ya is these are like one of my regrets and you know I I even told myself that if let's say lola our another cat, uh pass on I decided to just give her proper burial lah because it's just not fair and she's been there with us throughout all this time so


ya and and I can't bear to lose I can't bear to lose her, like every time when I see the video I just like cry like oh my god like what if what if one day it happen again like she will just gone so ya


ya she is she is ya that's why like that that time when I send over to vet like because, uh few times whenever I send to her to the vet I did like worried lah I felt very worried and every time when she visit a vet she always have high fever so it's so it's really quite sad and then like not only that the expenses for


uh animal vets are quite expensive like minimum will be like three hundred to four hundred depending on what issues they are facing so ya is quite sad


ya and like your your rice bowl is on the lifeline now you cannot afford to, be lazy or you cannot afford to lose a job is quite ya is there any moment that makes you feel very angry I believe there are moments right like


ya I, think at the end of the day we just need someone someone close that we can talk to you know be each be with each other's side no matter what the ups and downs and hopefully everything will will be fine ya just try to look to the bright side for it lah


okay, part two positive experience


okay what are the small things that always make you smile


hello ya ya ya


ya ya that's so true because I think family's important no matter what and is nice to see like everyone bond together ya so likewise I think but then like even as a family like


there are certain things that you might want to stay private because it's based on your own privacy ya so


ya ya I I get what you mean ya


ya like open up your circles ya so so you, usually like what do you do like let's say if you felt overwhelmed or you felt stressed out like what do you usually do to relax yourself because I know like sometimes our house can be a bit


too much like too much of a noise and sometimes yes sometimes you need uh point of relaxation so what what are the things that you really like to do when you want to relax and you know what other things that you want to do for relaxation


ya ya is ya I think that's like the common mindset ya true


ya because now like at this point of age I think it is good to focus more on your mental health, because especially during work from home circuit breaker period because like we are too used to being ourselves outside and we're not used to being as a person as ourselves inside home so


there are things that we are not really comfortable with so that's why it's like it's best to like prioritise our mental health at first , and also like if possible like whatever it is if, is I think most of us has the time to control to do whatever we want and as and not only time is more of how we set things aside like based on priorities so especially ya just to make yourself happy lah if you need if you think that


there is a need for you to go for spa you know if there's a need for you to ya , ya ya that's true so so is there any place that you wanted to go to like especially Osaka


, the bamboo forest is in Kyoto , ya ya


ya that is so true because of the virus it it doesn't really allow us ya,


is is a very nice place actually like I've been there for my graduation trip for a week with Syafiqah remember so so it was really a very interesting experience and , and until now I can never ever forget because the thing is that


uh the prices in japan are definitely definitely very expensive so so it's like going there is already part of your achievement because you don't really like believe yourself that oh my god I spend this amount just to go to japan so it's like is really the best


is really like the best experience for me lah and no matter what right among all other countries that, I will never I mean like I will still go to japan like japan will still be as the top priority list for me like like likewise like the bamboo forest everything is really really nice it's very nice


ya ya, oh ya ya that's so true ya, , ya so it's like actually I I have the main intention ya I actually wanted to bring you guys to japan like as a family trip lah so likewise hopefully with this virus as it subside that we can because I actually thought of bringing the girls over to Tokyo


and you know maybe like ya maybe we can plan a a two weeks ya , ya so apart from it like what what else do you like


like want to do like make you feel happy is there anything else or maybe like when or maybe like what was the thing that , make you laugh so hard or something like that like I know like when we watch comedy definitely we'll laugh a lot of things lah


, ya same lah like you know the moment where I laugh too hard is the moments that I didn't really expect that it will happen


ya ya that's why that's why ya , anyway like for me like as of current I think I did mention to you right I join taekwondo so like usually apart from making me to feel like as a girl that


can defend myself you know is I feel is really good in terms of health wise it makes you feel very, active and also it's like it makes you like I I like I'm that kind of person who like to take things in risk like like I'm a risk taker but yet at the same times like I cannot I cannot like


take so much risk if not it will like bring me down to depression like I need to take small steps to to achieve, ya


ya that's so true it's really really nice to say ya so also like is there, any moment that make you feel very proud like anything in terms of your own achievements or what


ya


ya because like like honestly speaking right my okay our siblings the the girls and my brother, Fika like he our age gap is so huge that people mistaken us as the girls are our kids and we all like there's there's one time


approach me and ask because I was pushing my sister inside the pram right, so they ask and then she like stare at me, up and down like like give me that look so I was like uh she ask me ya so it's like


I she ask me like oh uh are they twins are the girls twin are they are they your kids they like so how is your kid like where do they school where where are they schooling at, then I say oh ma'am I'm so sorry but they are not my kids they're my sisters so I was like


I'm so sorry but ya because like with this huge age gap and I I believe lah I'm not surprised lah with my generation having kids also so ya, it's kind of awkward


oh ya that was really good


I I remember it was batman


the he he drank the oyster the oyster right (ugh) !eww! , ya


it is good ya maybe like we can try again like and you know like especially now I I saw NDP, coupon they got like one for one uh window in the park maybe we can like just use that coupon and just go for it


of course ya but but the girls been asking me like when can we go to legoland we want to go legoland, ya ya and, and and legoland is in like malaysia


ya ya


so with all these right what what do you love about yourself, the most like what what what things that you really like about yourself, is there any ya ya


ya same goes to me too


, like do you ever get stressed like if any of your friends like ask, your your kids because especially me and Fika you know our age is like in our mid twenties right so like have you ever like came across your friends like eh your kid so old already when are they getting married you know that kind of thing you know I believe there are there are group of people who


, , okay that's cool ya


, , okay , ya


ya that that is very very true ya that's why


like it's it's not wrong for you to have a day to yourself like you want to do whatever you want to do just do it, ya ya, as long as it makes you feel happy then ya even though like okay maybe just a quick trip to starbucks and just have coffee and just cake also can


ya, ya, ya that's so true oh my god ya, ya just ya that is so true it's like it's quite a a very good moment ya


ya, ya that is so true ya I'm really thankful also ya thankful for everyone


everything ya ya okay (ppl)


done already, okay, uh part one finance, okay serene want to start first


how do you invest your money in to accumulate wealth, for your retirement, we are tried uh both of us tried to save ah and cause it's that uh of course is that the


it's a challenge for us lah because I been in and out of a different form of work for the past few years especially past few years have been in and out of quite a number of uh contract work so it's quite tough to maintain the saving ah, of course this year we set to try to save as much as possible


of course is at my CPF uh , uh accumulated to be close to about three two hundred over thousand already so, for retirement where I have a more than more way, above the uh the minimum sum so the remainder can be withdraw lah


but I still got uh at least uh five six years before I can withdraw


especially these few years is that the my income has been cutting and cutting because uh the market always the employer always like to take advantage of deep loss and people who have lost a job and then try to cut cut cut cut cut cut, and this a this is uh this cruel side of the world lah


they don't value you lah they just want take advantage of you , then is that uh so actually, when we, actually is that all this year I used to have a car lah decided later is that we decide not to have a car you got no point to have a car in singapore we can easily take a Grab car eh because uh we can always take a Grab car is cheaper than owning a car actually now the ERP the car park everywhere you go is quite expensive


and the COE is uh, over when I used to have a car like our COE is less than fifteen thousand now is that there's a few times the score up to fifty sixty thousand say no point to pay that piece of paper, I pay the piece of paper for ten uh I can take the Grab car for for twenty years oh don't even reach that the piece of paper of amount


okay no problem


then is at the actually this COVID nineteen ah actually uh a lot of my friends are badly affected lah because uh now is SIA is going to announce a two thousand four hundred people that will be retrenched worldwide I think is a majority will come from singapore


so have chit chat with my friend says that ah they are actually some of them are pilot one of them is a pilot he told me is that he has his backup plan already but he told me is he share he he share with me to not be so optimistic about the pilot pay retrench all this say they they they are okay they say there are different type of pilot some pilot are already


rich some pilot is that uh because of their habit high spending in the past they don't have much saving in their investment, so it is that lah this is a lesson learnt [orh] because is that uh I more concerned is that uh with the impact of the SIA retrenchment the entire upstream and downstream will be affected then there will be more people losses we don't say is only two thousand five hundred people lost


there will be estimated thought in ten to fifteen thousand a loss of job overtime because is that SIA scale down I believe a lot of us will be affected by SIA not because SI uh not only SIA staff uh lost a job any other businesses uh support services anything


that that would impact all of us so you and I might not be may not be will will be even more, petty mistake because it's that uh it'll affect our uh habit, it'll affect our uh saving habit it will uh affect our spending habit is a precautionary tale that such a big company used to be a darling in the aviation world now facing such a


unprecedented lock uh thing is that uh singapore SIA do not have a domestic airline, flight we only had international flight so singapore uh airline will be will be half time is a good reminder to us is that uh, we had to see how we going to adjust our our expectations in the futures expect uh how is us uh handle our finances right now


of course is that my my wife and I is to have to think about lah how we going to uh handle the the downturn over the next two three years to be honest with you this downturn will will last at least two three years do not say uh thing, that is going to have a short term effect it will have a long term effect on all of us


in this COVID and situations


eh no no no no problem, yup, about what you guys okay


of course uh to me is that uh credit card is convenient but now is that uh we have a thing called debit card uh the main thing between credit card and debit debit card is that debit card is tell you is that


you have one thousand dollars in your bank account you use it accordingly, but the problem is that the credit card is that uh they give you up to two months or uh whatever amount they feel the bank fine is you uh you are good good for for example you only earn about three three thousand dollar they give you five thousand dollars it means two thousand above your uh uh your your limit


I I know I used to work for the bank and we understand why we give that amount but the point is that you are using future money as long as that uh, nowadays ah to be honest with you ah I had been burned years ago and uh years ago so is that ah I know the the danger of uh the the the the flips the downside of credit card


so is that ah now is that I changed to another way okay every month I uh say I want use my my debit card I set uh I make sure is that I only limit myself to five hundred dollars per per month, to use uh to use debit card, that means uh whatever I uh I want to spend I spend according to that the amount of money I have in because debit card is tied to your bank account so it won't be uh it will habit you'll will be cautious how much you want to spend


and you won't uh overspend it, so is that uh for people who have no uh self discipline is best to have a debit card rather than credit card to me debit card and credit card is no different you go anywhere in the world there are Visa master, they don't care whether it's debit or credit as long that they the the they oversee the people can go through they just file they can buy the things simple as that


wait ah, uh what are your thoughts on CPF contribution to be honest with you lah , CPF CPF is a good scheme to be absolute honest uh to be absolute honest the only thing is that uh since nineteen eighties is that we have a lots of uh debate and argument


and unhappiness I think in every elections this topic is always bounce up, let's go back uh to me is that uh CPF contribution does do a lot good for me is also helped me to save for my future my retirement


the only thing I not happy is that lah I not really happy is that lah , I got two hundred over thousand, now I have two hundred over thousand two hundred thirty forty thousand right now before four five six years before I retirement


, and uh I understand why the government I understand the initial part thoughts of the government's uh in eighties, that they say uh some to have a minimum sum to be maintained so that they can afford their retirement sometimes it afraid because they have a horror story in eighties is that a lot old people withdraw all the money out of sudden they have no more money after a a few more years because they anyhow spend


that trigger a lot point that uh we have the minimum sum so they can prepare them uh for retirement but the thing is that no matter to me is that, uh, where we have all these uh CPF contributions and minimum sum we also must all think about the safety net


but the problem is that safety net since it had been evolved since nineteen eighties but probably is that uh, the government on one hand they uh do not want to have a so much safety net to the point that the people will rely on government they also want people to rely on themselves


and family everything but the government had to remember, every family have their own problems it can't simply okay they pushing everything there's a always there's a purpose of why singaporeans everyone of us pay tax the, the tax is for you to help us to manage is a loan to me is that tax


it's not only uh a contribution of singapore citizen to the government as a social contract to, uh repay you, but this payment is a uh a is a combined resources, to prepare the government to spare on the uh citizen when time is is uh is like to uh giving back to the citizen to help us to resolve some crisis COVID nineteen is a good example we spend well how many billion of dollars


the question I always ask, this amount of money is it well spent, to keep the singapore uh afloat is it targeted all this thing I I really, don't know lah actually is that I keep on still uh this illusion about the current situations CPF to me is that I just want to see my money at the end of the day is it CPF


was uh created as a social contract between government and us us singaporeans now the our audacious social contract have been broken by right is that ah by the age of fifty five we can take back all our money at us at the a good eh were agreed, social contract this social contract there's a


between a government and now have been the goalpost have been shift and shift and shift to the point that ah, people are get fed up how much goalpost you want to shift, that is a question is been post, and no not a single minister, can satisfy the answer given back to the citizens


and this by right the first generation leader is the I <P1>Toh Chin Chye</P1> I think remember doctor Toh, in the doctor Toh or doctor Goh ah cannot remember in the eighties debate with <P1>Goh Chok Tong</P1> and the rest he say, this is a social contract we we first generation agreed with our citizens of singaporeans singapore


why are we stopping them it's like the, we give a loan to government, in a sense form of CPF contribution at the at the age of fifty five I can withdraw back just like I give I put a saving in a bank


at the age of fifty five expect to get back my money from the bank, how can it withhold the bank how can the bank tell me oh, uh cannot withdraw let you withdraw your fifty five thousand okay we let you withdraw five thousand fifty thousand have to keep in the bank do you think it makes sense or not to you this is a point I uh I uh been harping on doctor <P1>Toh Chin Chye</P1> and the argument until today we have broken the social contract with the singaporean already since the eighties


actually is that uh I have I used to work in the life insurance and the uh the a uh generation asa, there's a question always post at that point of time in the two uh fifteen twenty years ago there's always a lot endowment plan oh plan for your children plan for the children so that they can have us uh money to pay for their uh education all this thing


but actually is that ah, all this endowment until today ah fifteen existed until years ago a lot them have the value ah less than what people expected , but the because all those uh contracts sold at that point of time two thousand one to two thousand five they as they give you a very high return but those high return it's not guarantee but they see a if you look at the guarantee actually is about two to


one one point five to two point five percent guarantee but the rest all this high actually a lot of that did not materialise so is that uh to me is that uh, you need not to plan for the children so much uh so that they have hundred thousand two hundred thousand in the uh in the year to come maybe twenty years after they are born


but sometimes is that ah you tend too much ah, actually all those are non clarity return, if we look at very properly a lot of people are uh trapped into it oh they realise is that I put so much money into it now is that uh now my girl uh happen to can go to uh can go to university


I realise is that the amount they they can cash out ah is less than what they expected right now uh serene this is a truth I, have recently find out , uh then instead ah they realise is that the same amount ah they go into CPF ah they had turned up more than actually more than fifty percent of the so call the insurance contract uh uh sold in the fifty twenty uh fifteen twenty years ago


and, yup twenty minutes already


ya press the red [ah]


okay started already, negative experience


okay I am uh cannot say is a negative per se but it's a little bit interesting experience I gone through in uh my younger days , I think my wife may not fully uh know my background in the soccer when I was in soccer days


I handle a lot of funeral in the past uh I handle a lot of funeral I handle quite a number of people going uh passing away, I visited uh some of my members in the the hospice where they are left about one or two months before they gone


I handle one of my case one of my case is that uh one of my member commit suicide jump from the ten or eleventh floor uh this is a quite uh impactful rather than I cannot use the word negative I cannot say uh


positive is an impactful experience uh going through the the sadness the kind of situations my members are going through , there are two incident that made me two or three incidents that really leave a lasting impressions on me there's one time is that and I was a youth leader


one of my member uh, parents is uh have a stage four uh cancer and she's living in a hospice , uh somehow that that that particular day I got something to nudge me to go and see her


so I went to see her and uh and the husband and the children in the hospice and uh talking to her and then is that I don't know why I ask is there any uh last say you want to don't say last say anything important that share with your husband and the children


at that point at that day had a omen I can say it's a <mandarin>回光回光返照:hui guang hui guang fan zhao</mandarin> uh means something happen is that when the person before he passed away the day or two one or two days before he pass away he all of a sudden become very, very alert actually they uh most of the time she is not that alert but the particular days alert and then she


uh say a lot of important things and final things you want to say to the husband and children, and that day I I was with them next day she pass away already peacefully that leave a lot impact on me instead, this is not the first time not the only time and then is at least several time I have this kind of nudge to see the person for the last time


the next one is that one of my , a friend who from my one of the group inside the soka is that uh he had a terrible accident okay when I see him half his head is, gone so some call some of his skull and all fractured already some of the uh his is become like a half a vegetable no not say half a his is he his physical body is there is not coma


it just that cannot respond to you had no uh some of his function uh speech function all gone he can only he do not know whether we do not know whether he respond because he he can eat he can move a bit here and there on the bed but to me is that half his soul is gone already


so it's very impactful, and the last one is that uh , one of the funeral I uh have to be uh conducted I'm uh as a MC, the day is in mount vernon, all of us I do not understand all my leaders and the all my all members all get in the car I'm the only one left


there had no way to uh squeeze in the car so I had to walk up for mount vernon pass by the cemetery at the the most most haunted place is called the muslim cemetery I passed by walk through outside a catholic and christian cemetery it was a little bit scary but I wasn't it was a not say hundred percent negative or positive


but I just walk through blissfully, without uh seeing anything because some of the people who walk through that place they see something , so is something so call not impactful


that uh really drill something into my life it say that life is so fragile, I feel sad when I see some of this members who pass away especially I however I got the honour and privilege to minister to them at that point of time to see them pass away peacefully also


try to be free flow I did it your turn my turn , actually one of the I cannot say is negative it's just a very impactful experience I have, all these years is that uh I don't really cry, I just like the, tears flow through


but, this one year I cannot cry I was very very sad really very very sad that was my second year uh of my lah year two of my university, my grandfather pass away in november uh of nineteen ninety four if I remember correctly


yes nineteen ninety four die at november second if I'm not, , I at that point of time a little bit angry a little bit sad, a little bit confuse I was uh not I am a christian right now at that point of time I was not christian


I don't like my uncle the uncle uh conduct uh okay insist that my grandfather is a christian so he will uh perform the christian rite for him I was very angry, I was really angry at the same time I was very sad cause my grandfather father we are very close since I was a baby he had I was I I know I I didn't I don't remember how he helped me when I was a baby I was told is that when I was born


I am the first born, uh my mother told me uh is my grandfather is a maternal grandfather


I am the <mandarin>外孙最大:wai sun zui da</mandarin> but I in all the grandchildren I am the eldest, so I am so consider firstborn not in the traditional firstborn in the sense that uh I'm the first one, in the whole family outside the life family to be born I myself instead


so my relation with my grandfather is very very close because, I literally stay in my with my grandfather since I was baby or toddler I have spent most my time, I don't really want to go back to my own home when I were have a uh chance to stay my grandfather home I stay with him that is kind of relationship I have my grandfather so when my grandfather pass away I I want to cry but I cannot cry out


the the bad the worst experience you may you'll have, when you're you have someone you love a lot, and care a lot, it is my uh paternal maternal grandfather pass away who are so close to me, you can't even cry you can't even had tears come up


that is a worst experience you will ever have, in your life I can't I don't understand I cannot cannot cry, but I cry a lot inside my heart that is the experience I have


so this is something , I I until today I don't understand why I did not cannot cry, dear free flow


!hais!, maybe I share something the, recently the one of my ex colleague uh recently passed away,


uh I left the company indirectly was consider retrenched or discontinue all my contract with the ex company, because the the way we structured is very different from other company they go by different account,


so he is the one who made a decisions and then my boss say that since he don't want me okay we decide to not to continue with the uh this particulars uh, client account, but my boss can't can't find me alternative account to stay put and he uh uh take office one oh do not have the money to sustain me so eventually I was let go actually I was not say sour against him


a little bit uh disappointed and the kind of uh, uh we, he is a good guy according to what I was uh told about two or three two or three years ago where he's joined this account he was a good guy he's able all of us enjoy working together to whole whole bunch of them but over the years he had changed because maybe it's the stress


because unreasonable demand for the customer it causes him try to protect himself all this thing to get the things uh try to push the thing to us to to try to get things done but we all know that things cannot be done because it's an unreasonable demand


so so at this in the end I left the company in may fortunately I got uh another job from another friend, which I still with him right now, , couple of weeks ago I receive a a text whatsapp message to one of my from one of my ex colleague who's still working down there we have our special chat group uh connecting all those ex colleague and some uh current colleagues


on our own tell us is at this uh, the the hea~the the this uh account director passed away which is my ex colleague, we are all in shock, so actually I went to see him on the saturday because that's the only day I can go I I can go down and see him I had to stop my lesson halfway to go and see him


because at that point of time I spoken to the wife he said the wife want to have a second opinion when I read the the medical report I also consult some how to read the report I realise this report is no good I noticed is a first step of the uh, of a series uh procedure from the MOH guideline seven step process to trigger off the declaration of brain dead the moment is declaration of brain dead you're as good as dead declare he dead dead dead


so however I just try to uh help her to get the protocol clearance to get this, get all my wife uh old friend who is a neurologist to look at the see the second opinion see whether what can be done what cannot be done what to expect from from now


but, I know we all know this one had no hope already because I showed it to an one of my church friend he say he she she also look at the report, she only made this comment only jesus can help him no but nothing in this world can help him she told me is he's brain dead already considered first step of brain dead already I was rather sad


we have some differences between us I really I feel sad and the very very very comforting myself, I I actually there's a point I really hate him, but later I don't don't really hate him that much already I just feel disappointed in him maybe things change you over the time last two years


their pastor say become this kind of person but I see him lying down on the on the hospital bed, where the ventilator is forcing just can imagine we are really so call first stage uh conserve brain dead brain stem no uh no reflexes it means as good as man dead already it's a first step was that brain dead already I see the ventilator so called life support system actually I don't want call it life support system is


technically it's called organ support system is not even life, at all because it possess no life in him already when I see him I cannot feel any life I was a, youth leader in the Soka, when a person had no life I can feel that already I just see things is uh forcing the air into his lungs forcing his uh blood uh heart to beat


I feel so heartache I I I want to cry I cannot cry at that point in time I do not know why I cannot cry again I feel very sad for him as same time there's a relief for me is that, I let you go but I cannot let him go at that point of time so I see him again on the sunday morning with together other colleagues one by one we say the last goodbye to him because I know something is going to happen on that two days


sure enough sunday night, the doctor and the, the two independent doctor declares his brain dead and the uh the family made a decision to do a donor uh full organ donations the next day, on tuesday afternoon they placed him in the funeral parlour


I can tell you I'm the only person who's go to see him and spent the last thirty minutes with him alone whereas whole body, before putting into the coffin, actually a lot of people dare not to do this actually to to be honest with you but I'm so immune so called immune to death I seen so many death body


I go to see him and spend half an hour, talking to him, about the disappointment, I say all these all these let go already, and he go in peace , I already I also promising him if your housewife need any help in what way


I will give her contact to contact us if you your uh wife need any help I was quite sad uh actually sad, but not to the point I I I I I cry a good man, okay


travel experience, positive experience yes


ya still running, twenty two minutes already that one twenty two already, yup


dear you can share your your travel experience, that it give a great impressions since you travelled so much last time when you're younger days


spain or what, dear can talk, no you can talk about spain if you want


hello okay I hear you


hello eh angel can you still hear me, can you hear me now, okay for me is that uh, okay for my travel is that uh


my most memorable is my first time to go to taiwan, it was my the first uh first uh not say t first is one of my first few uh business travel uh with my one of my favourite uh company which I work with


and at that time is that it's not about the country I go it's about the people I met in taiwan I met a few uh two very uh one very beautiful girl uh colleague and one very handsome boy and they're younger than us uh


but they being a very good host and then is that we enjoy our stay down there and then we are doing our consulting work with one of the the bigger quite a big security house at that point of time so I enjoy staying there, uh although the the trip was cut short but uh


due to some emergency at home but my memorable is that uh uh my memory is is good if it not pick up not even though the they are having a major this uh constructions uh in for their MRT in the in the entire Taipei uh I also see the very first uh


glimpse of the uh downtown of the the downtown of the Taipei of course is that today you can see uh uh <mandarin>台北幺零幺:tai bei yao ling yao</mandarin> and the the sum of those uh high high end uh shopping area, I was there many years ago where this uh what <mandarin>幺零幺:yao ling yao</mandarin>is not is not completed and I see all those new building coming out so is that is very fascinating to see the Taipei at that point of time where they are trying to build up their MRT the whole place are very messy but


very authentic you can smell all the you can smell all sort of the total food authentic total full authentic taiwanese uh


food at that point of time, if you go back to taiwan right now uh even the last uh uh family trip taiwan about six seven years ago there, uh it can never compare to the time I went there around nineteen two thousand one two uh two year two thousand is totally different building you cannot


the kind of food you eat during that time you cannot find when I was there in two thousand twelve two thousand thirteen, so I really miss those time where they can like as singaporean typically singaporean to say that I miss those old time hawker food just like you're you've missed those uh old time taiwanese uh typical


night market food, so I still enjoy still is uh one of the uh good memory I have ah


okay hold on ah , actually the describe the moment when I feel, felt the luckiest uh, or rather say what is my proudest moment of my life okay there are two moment alive I have felt the proudest uh because is that uh


the day I graduate for NTU why I say that because is that uh a lot of of my my friends ah cannot understand how I can survive my NTU time, because I did decently well in my year one but luckily to year two they had swapped into semester system rather than the uh annual uh annual system that means they have must uh pass year year one then can you move to year two


in year year two uh is become semester system I fail one subject in one semester then I fail another subject in year uh semester, uh two of the year two, but lucky that I can move to year three because uh it's a semester basis I can retake the the paper in the subject in the another semester so what happened is that the there's the the best part is that in the year three semester one they don't have the subject I can do so I had to sort push everything to the


to the semester two of the year three, so a lot of my classmate are very worried about me say afraid that I cannot complete my of the final year project at same time all of them are doing two subject I doing four subject, four or five such that I cannot remember exactly it four or five uh four or five


so they are worried about me whether I can survive, the semester two, I had to I told my friend I literally uh had to literary I crying know I literally cry and not say cry uh tears come


rowing tears ah when I study very very hard ah for the last six week of my before the exam, literally everyday tears come up because is that ah we are doing, three of the toughest paper


three of the toughest paper for year year three, and those two taper I failed actually is the toughest paper so I had I had to do do it all over again, finally is that uh uh at the same time is that uh all all of them ah most of them ah have found a job before they uh they uh going for exam two or three weeks before I haven't even start looking for a job but I'm very lucky


I wrote in to one of the dream, company where all the accountancy students are, dream, it is a one of big four ernst and young, there are thousand of accountancy student go go for interview only less than hundred fifty was selected


but because I am a non-accountancy student I went for interview, I my experience of my interview of compared to the rest of the people go for interview some of my classmate interview !wah! they too had a grand tour they do this do that I go the interview ah


I only listen to the partner the in charge ah he talked to me for forty five minutes he rarely asked me questions I thought very out of one hour I only talk for less than fifteen minute he talked for forty five minutes I thought I no no hope already and furthermore is that I was select uh say I I I think I pass a very I was I pass very well for the aptitude test


and then is that uh compared to the people who got go for interview they have a different story from what I have I thought I had no hope already, the best part is that ah the last Kiasu moment, I got, they give me a call one few days or one week before my exam it said I am offered the job when my those friends all who had grand tour of the place they did not get uh


most of them did not get a job only one or two get one of them get a job see I say that is that ah, when I graduate ah, I did not even qualify to have a pass in merit because I failed two subject because they will downgrade you once you have failed before so I have only pass subject uh pass pass uh degree the rest of my classmate have one first class second upper class a lot of them


then uh the same the the my the classmate who were have the the schoolmate who got the same job at ernst and young and me she got a second lower class, I got only pass uh degree so I was very lucky, not only I pass my final exam clear all the three toughest paper that is a moment I feel I'm I'm very proudest and happiest and luckiest I pass my exam and graduate and I uh landed in a dream job a lot of my accountancy


class uh schoolmate uh, dripping a saliva for it drooling for it I do not know what I end up there I that is of a my luckiest moment and the proudest moment


hold on ah, okay describe your favourite activity to unwind and relax actually is that uh


I'm a reader I like to read and I enjoy reading, I have acquired the habit of readings actually I I from the kind of uh family background of a social background doesn't really cultivate uh reading habit


I grow up at the in the uh environment in redhill #Tiong Bahru#, which is in the seventies eighties is famous a lot of by of a lot of secret society my wife also stay around redhill uh #Bukit Ho Swee# area so we both of us are grew up on that kind of environment in fact is that the my neighbour uh quite a number of them are gangster


the only thing I feel good at that point of time is that uh, my mother has somehow talk to the mother of the other the neighbour who are gangster say do not bring my son do not get my son involved in gangster or secret society that's a kind of agreement


I did not know about it actually at the point of time actually at that point of time all of us always play together we have all all sort of uh we we are naughty children being children being we're children that is a kind, what we do at that point of time we rolled down the the slip we don't care about the danger


but, this is the kind of background I have but it at the age of thirteen fourteen I met a religious group called Soka at that point of time, uh we have a very good uh mentor at that point of time in the students uh divisions they they the the the there's few of mentor down there is the division chief at that point of time we call them


two or three of they influence me a lot to read a lot, and then also look out the the president where the Soka guy uh at that point of time is uh president Ikeda , he wrote a lot of uh what we called guidance paper I mean they provide guidance to the younger generation and the adults through all this reading is that there's always share about different books uh the books like the cry and punishment fyodor dostoyevsky leo tolstoy uh victor hugo


a lot of these writers the it really plato socrates aristotle, he influence me a lot at that point of time I really read a lot during my younger days, I cannot imagine I read so much during that point of time, even I read a lot I still fail my O level I barely I barely pass but


I managed to go to pre U, but the passion of reading and the passion of studying after a wake up call after almost fail my O level, that is make me even read even more that that is why after uh if this kind of passionate reading at that during the younger days they lay the foundation of my men uh my my my thoughts my flow of thoughts


so is that sometimes is that people don't understand me because is that all my thoughts are influenced by all those great philosopher great writers of of the past, so my thinking is slightly different all the people from my Soka Gakkai they understand it cause is that we had a similar uh influence from of course in term of personality uh different but I love enjoy I like to hide into the world of reading where reading all those uh


science some I also read science fictions I reading read at that point of time I also read agatha christie other all those uh kind, interesting books I read that is why is that that is, when I read I just simply help me to unwind help me to escape to another world that's why I enjoy reading a lot


I hate Daiso


okay despite ongoing global uncertainty, ah okay I don't want to be too religious about it what make you optimistic about the futures, to be honest is that a lot of people feel very pessimistic in the current COVID nineteen I to be very frank with you COVID nineteen have a very great uh great impact on the mental state of a lot of people


with or without you being conscious unconscious about it I've seen quite a few of my colleagues uh, , mentally stressed out and one of them, pass away a couple of weeks ago, but despite all this uh difficulty is that uh, I am a bit religious I still have uh


blessed hope in in the future, for my saviour to come he will uh bring us through because of my this blessed hope I feel very optimistic for my children yes the world may be unkind may be uncruel but as long I hold this blessed hope


that the things will work out work out fine, because I don't trust in human being human being I love to me is that no matter how great our great humanity we have, we are also have the this weakness in us, we can be great as much as we can can that is one humanism perspective but no no matter how a human can be a humanistic there also a point that will they fail you


still recording red colour, it's red colour ya I saw okay


part one finance, uh


uh what is your question sorry like how, how do I invest ah, uh I think desmond you start first ah


so as (ppc) how should I say in terms of financial uh I I actually leave, most of it to uh desmond to handle because, he been uh he because he graduated as accountancy, from school accountancy so


, most of uh I will handle the the household things whereas he handles the the financial part you see so I'm not very much involved in that actually, and in in terms of like uh knowledge of financial products I'm not very good in it like uh for example insurance of course don't talk about investment it it


before you can actually go into investment first of all you must have extra cash, the cash part that uh what desmond has share is that he has been out of job, here and there so, definitely saving is a bit tough for us because we we actually have uh two girls who is uh right now are teenagers see see


uh eh joy actually I want to ask you uh is it we're supposed to go from the question one to question nineteen, that we have so, the jump is alright right, ya


then in terms of like uh right now the in a post COVID right question number four, what changes are you making in terms of spending and saving habits, so is like now is a tough time of course uh


saving is still important lah since young uh we are thought by our parents it is that we have to learn to save for raining days so these days , how should I say this kind of education is very important I also impose it on my girls as well that make sure they also have whatever uh


uh money we give to them for their school so we also like, uh telling them even though it's ten cent twenty cents or one dollar , uh it's still money so it's good to have some savings so we actually have uh the saving box for them


so that they can put in their coin you see, then once is full we'll get it changed into uh dollar notes and we are we will help them to bank in to their uh personal bank account


ya in fact uh talking about this COVID, I mean of course I hope that uh, this phase the phase three will come soon and hope that, our life can be normal again and we do not have to uh wear mask actually when we go out you see and on on top of it it's like uh as as what desmond say many people actually lost their job


so hopefully that the government can do something for the singaporeans especially you know, uh, like know we we have some some of them have uh housing to finance children, uh education and so on


know somehow we also need to take care of our parents you see, so hopefully uh uh there'll good news coming in know things like that and, I want to touch on uh number seven do you think one should own a credit card


actually uh yes and no, yes is uh of course credit card is very convenient to many people when it goes go out for shopping or you shop online things like that, the the convenient is there but, if somebody like you know uh if owning a credit card and he or she doesn't know how to control the financial part then it become a (ppc) a negative things for the person you see


ya I did, ya I did


and uh talking about uh number six what advice would you give to someone to get him or her out of debts, it all depends if the person is a gambler like to gamble, so this is something he or she


uh it's very difficult to get him get him or her out of it unless, he or she is willing to change, and, getting out of debts is something uh never easy for someone someone who is in inside the debts itself you see


and uh it take it make it takes a lot of changes from the person, that's what I think ya


I want to talk about uh question thirteen how would you make a financial plan investment portfolio for your family or children okay I want to touch on children uh especially, you see sometimes as mentioned you must always have a like know additional cash depends on uh how much is your earning and somehow we can plan plan plan so much [orh] then


ya in the beginning like I remembered when my girl was born in two zero zero three ya we also buy buy the insurance for her but, but during the uh between two zero zero three till now uh in between uh


uh the years uh, like know out of a sudden we have some financial crisis so we couldn't uh go on with the insurance and we had actually break the uh so call the insurance for my girls, ya so these are the thing that you on one hand yes we plan at that time both of us are working but subsequent when uh I gave birth to my girl I actually stop working so is actually one income and it it wasn't easy for my husband desmond


uh uh he he basing on his one income to support four of us so so that is the thing and and also as mentioned he lost his job due to uh financial economy that is not uh doing uh well in singapore


and, ya I did I did I did, ya so so things like that uh I I felt that uh, right now we don't have we only have other insurance for our girl like for example hospitalisation you see


and other than that we do not have the extra cash uh to to buy other insurance for them like endowment all this and that so, we leave it, for uh to them when they are older when they start to come out to work then let let them let other financial (eh)


err uh consultant to advise them know whether they should pick up the insurance based on their uh salary, (ppc)


(ppc)


okay


ya, press the red button


okay it's running now, negative experience


okay I like to talk about uh my greatest fear is actually, death, death is something that comes to anyone of us at anytime at any moment and any place this is something that nobody can uh understand nobody can uh avoid it know


like recently I see ah you see read in Facebook about this chef, all of sudden he died of uh cardiac arrest it seems that, know stress is the main thing to anybody in singapore I mean or generally all over the world


that all of a sudden the person just collapsed so uh death is always uh on my mind, uh, know it's something, you, whether you're rich you're poor you're highly educated or not highly educated we all have to face death


uh somehow or rather one of these days , so my fear is actually uh not uh, if I were to die early and my girl are, uh still young know who will take care of them this is my greatest fear you see


and uh I also like to talk about uh what frustrates me, what frustrates me is that if let's say sometimes at work , when I encounters uh a problem I will always try to keep quiet I try not to have a direct confrontation because


uh that is not me especially uh among colleagues because uh I do not want to like uh know go to work you give me this kind of look I give you that kind of look so I I don't like it you see so , uh I I felt that I in in terms of such relationship I don't know how to uh like


like, go to the person and ask is there anything uh that I say know uh, that hurt you or what I this is uh, this is a part that I find that uh frustrate me a lot is that I don't dare to like go and talk to the person or find out


or confront, know like now I can tell you you know you might tell me oh eh this is what you can tell me now over here but I can't do it, on live with the person directly so, that's where uh I will choose to keep silent ya this is uh maybe uh the way of escape


for me, desmond your turn


okay , I'd like to talk about a series of unfortunate events describe a time where everything could, possibly easy go wrong, and how do I overcome four five years ago actually (ppc)


uh I I cannot remember the year about five years ago I lost uh my elder brother to uh, lung cancer, ya then of course uh he was diagnosed uh much earlier so my mom was uh kind of


uh mentally prepared to let to let go of him already knowing that he cannot survive, so subsequent uh, within the eight months (ppc) my brother actually passed away in , november


late november so subsequent eight months later my my sister pass I'm the youngest at home, so there are only three of us so my sister actually pass away because of breast cancer relapse the third or fourth time


ya she suffered from uh breast cancer for about ten eleven years, ya that was a terrible time for myself, and my mother, it I mean more so for my mom lah because


uh she I mean to put this way that my my mom been in that era in the, world war two era of course she will favour more uh boys more than girls, , so it was a very sad time for her especially


to the extent that uh, , she actually after my sister passed away


she couldn't sleep, well for the one whole month to the extent uh, she has spectacle, she was sitting alone, and


she actually err knock against her window grill, and we have to send her to the hospital, ya so uh of course


as the year passed by, , it's about four to five years, I know that it's never easy for her, uh slowly she has, learn to let go


ya, and how do I overcome them , I learnt to value lives


yes yes yes yes


okay (ppc) uh, positive positive experience, ya positive experience


my, uh five one two seven, , uh travel experience ah


, ya (ppc) I used to work in a travel agent for seventeen years so I I travel quite a bit lah, ya uh travel experience ah that left me in old ah uh just can't think of at this moment maybe


eh I think uh, uh I would say is uh uh sorry, what do you say desmond what do you say desmond can you hear me


I would say uh, I would say is, uh on new zealand okay I I have uh it was my first time uh taking a helicopter actually, , uh that was uh I I travel uh


a lot of places uh before my marriage so uh I I just cannot remember the year lah ya so uh that was the first time I actually on a helicopter, and also, another uh place that is I actually also when uh in nineteen ninety two uh I was uh flying alone to all the way to #new york#


that was uh because err that year uh SIA actually started the I don't say it's direct lah I actually uh, stopped over in Frankfurt germany so they're trying they're actually promoting the flight to #new york# so I actually because I used to work with American Express travel you see


so uh with my name card I actually request from the one of the air steward uh man uh take a look at the cockpit so , uh that was my first time really go into the cockpit and it was like amazing like know who will have a chance to go except the pilot right


not not even the the air stewardess or air steward because uh air stewardess and steward is only serving the the food and the drinks , other than that nobody can just go in as and when you like except the pilot so it is uh something that uh I will not forget until today ya


desmond, desmond ya, ya I can hear you desmond


ya you just say lah


uh just now uh talking about describe the moment when you felt the luckiest actually , as I mentioned I work in a travel agent for seventeen years so consecutively uh there's two years I actually won uh first price ticket


uh I still remember err, the I mean in terms of uh like dinner and dance lucky draw lah I actually won the first prize so was my first prize was actually uh, uh the first one, was uh a ticket to perth so I actually uh bought an extra ticket uh for my mom so that was a first time I travel I mean so called travel with my mom to a #ang mo# country lah australia perth ya so that


uh of course made by mom happy, then the subsequent uh the the second year I also won first prize again through the dinner and dance uh this one is a ticket to anywhere in in uh europe by uh lufthansa airline the german airline so I actually uh chose uh Frankfurt and that's where I get my


err, how should I say ah my friends who is a journalist whom I met uh during my #new york# trip in nineteen ninety two uh so after that after the trip, uh we actually how should I put it across is like


after uh during the my #new york# trip I was a free and easy so I met him during a tour and that's where uh we kept in touch as friends are through last time is, uh know writing uh letters to each other as friends and


uh he's #ang mo# of course so he he's a dutch so I actually get him to come over to germany to pick me up, ya so we actually took uh a, how should I say a train ride from uh Frankfurt to uh Amsterdam so was a beautiful ride


ya so I I felt that uh, know consecutively I actually won first prize twice ya so this show I I I felt err ya, uh I'm blessed, ya desmond your turn


okay uh I like to uh the next question was what makes you want to be alive, because uh I believe that I mean myself uh, my religion is actually uh christianity so god has created us I'm not here to preach ah god has created us so uh


know why not live the best out of it, uh, before we are called home ah, be to be with god you see so uh, what makes me want to be alive is uh of course I have a family I have my two girls I'd like to see them uh grow up find a job have boyfriends get married and have their own life lah to lead with their children all this and that


and, and on top of it it's like uh I have yet to travel around the world this is my dream, and uh I I I love to move around you see, so uh I, I hope I can accomplish that, ya


desmond


oh ya for me uh how I actually unwind actually I uh, every time I when my off day uh I will like to go to Daiso, to look at little things, and you know, ya desmond didn't like Daiso myself I love Daiso so I have a lot of items is from Daiso actually so because it's two dollars somehow you buy and buy and buy !wah! end up !huh! to eighteen dollars twenty dollars so is like


uh, ya some of the things I I would say is not necessarily lah but, since I already paid for it so I I I'm just too lazy to go and uh refund it or whatever you see so this is one of the way I actually unwind and relax for myself ya


so uh twenty minutes is up


okay still recording, ya, red press the red button [ah]


part one finance, uh Goh do you have personal insurance, like what what kind of policy


(mmhmm), ah okay okay, uh for myself, I have uh accident I have uh I don't have savings yet I have


hospitalisation and I have critical illness, yes why not do the savings plan


uh the hospitalisation and accident definitely I feel, uh worthy policies to have because I've uh tapped on them, and I believe I'll be tapping on them in future also I mean it's the kind it's the thing where you never know when you're going to need it


ya and the critical illness is just something to safeguard myself, touch wood if anything were to happen lah so I find a lot of value in these policies, ya it's just that uh moving forward I think I should


once I'm more stable I should probably get like a endowment, plan I think, (mmhmm)


(mmhmm), (mmhmm), but but you do agree that this is something you need essentially lah something


(mmhmm), (mmhmm) (mmhmm), (mmhmm) (mmhmm) but, (mmhmm), (mmhmm) what's that,


(mmhmm), oh oh (uh huh), okay okay but then uh then again do you think there are there are times where


uh you were not covered, because uh, because of you you you thinking that it actually covers then you go ahead and do stuff and then it never actually cover


(mmhmm), (mmhmm) (mmhmm), ah, so what was your situation like


okay okay, (mmhmm), (mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


okay okay, okay, so happens it it it isn't lah, (mmhmm), right, so it is so you are agreeable that at the end of the day and no matter what policy you take it is a grey area where you can redeem and where you can't and there is no


it's not clear cut


okay, ya, ya ya


correct correct correct, ya at the end of the day at the end of the day, ,


okay okay but but then this might this, whole thing this whole thing might be a reason why sometimes you, you actually don't go forth and then take on a policy because you don't know what it actually covers cause it tells you one thing and then it what you're covered for is another thing you know


, (uh huh), no I mean it it could've been a oversight or whatever lah friend or not lah


ya ya, (mmhmm) (mmhmm), (mmhmm), ya and they tell you it's covered then you go go forth with a ten K twenty K


uh, procedure and then next thing you know you're not covered so this actually puts you one step back when you when you don't even know and then you don't even, you can't comprehend like, it this something I can do something I can go forward because at the end of the day you cannot call up the company to clarify also cause your agent is the person you clarify with


correct correct


ya ya stuff, (mmhmm) (mmhmm), ya, like I honestly feel ah like uh if I don't know if it's just me but I feel like a bit better to have uh


did instead of me going to my agent and then to clarify him uh eh bro does this cover this uh can I go on to to with this procedure can I go to the hospital, to cause uh I injured my knee and is it covered under accident plan because sometimes he might tell me one thing but then in reality it could be something else


so wouldn't it be better to have uh like a hotline or somewhere we can call in to actually check and then, clarify for ourselves, cause that will become something a lot more true


, ya, correct correct, (mmhmm) (mmhmm), ya cause otherwise otherwise like you know that there are people that might not even want to take cause


uh now recently there is some changes to some critical illness plan and then apparently, the the, the policies uh I mean,


(mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm), ya lah


(uh huh), okay okay


right which doesn't sound very fair to you too because, old plan or new plan and it ultimately it is the same plan


(mmhmm), okay okay so stuff like this actually like you know makes you want to think twice and you don't want to take on policy ah accident policy or hospitalisation


ya ya I I uh it is a necessity but, you just don't feel super content like putting your money in there because, ya ya I mean there's the your heart is in two places lah one sometimes you think can claim sometimes you think cannot claim then it's like


ya, (mmhmm)


okay okay, ya, (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


yup yup yup yup that's fair that's fair uh just a moment, just one second ah


I got logged out though, no I got logged out on appen, yup, uh it just suddenly hit this screen I had this yup


okay I start recording now, I want finance, okay okay (mmhmm)


okay so back to back to where we were what kind of uh insurance you think essential for those of our age ah


but then again I actually meant we have become more active we are more we have a more healthy lifestyle and everything so, the


you're younger okay, (mmhmm) right right right, (mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


(mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm) ya


okay okay okay eh I mean it depends for savings I believe you know it you need to have liquid money on hand first, and then after that if you have a lot of liquid money, to to, for your daily expenditure for any emergencies


then it's fine to go on to to move on to savings plan and then like park it there


(mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm), but what you've taken now you feel it's uh enough coverage lah at this juncture


I I I concur with what you what you say because uh, I've uh I've had hospitalisation policies since young, funny thing is my dad never knew that uhhe actually bought these plans which I feel it's a very very it's a issue it's a big issue that you know


that uh can't can't be addressed individually because it's something up to the individual to go and find out what he's actually signing up for, but so my dad actually ended up taking uh hospitalisation policies for all [loh] for me my sibling and the two of them


which I never knew I had so I went to I went I did two operations, both weren't covered, and only when the third one, uh and went to probe and ask say what so what is it that you are actually paying for


and he's like you know I'm not sure and then I went to check and then only then did I realise I've been he's been paying private cover, all these years, ya, (mmhmm) yup yup correct


(mmhmm) (mmhmm), ya ya correct


(mmhmm), what ya fair fair fair


ya, (uh huh), ya but I I I don't know if I you want to say it is prevalent among the elderly where they don't they actually have policies they just don't know what they are


ya ya right, (mmhmm) (mmhmm), ya exactly


ya and then then I mean the thing is he is also like you know okay this is something I sign for four days ago, I might not know and then I might not be as tech savvy as as the the kids these days so, the owners it's on them to go and check and then let me know so they on their on their end they're not so


they are not aware lah basically and it is worse when uh, uh agent that signs them leave the company leave the industry and then uh automatically someone else, uh, they they allocate someone else automatically


and then this person doesn't bother engaging doesn't do anything, because he doesn't need have to he doesn't need to you know, then this whole thing just becomes lost, it's like a lost cause, like, but it's just uh cash outflow lah


so that's why I feel uh this whole uh insurance thing it loses its meaning, unless definitely you do your own owners of going and then digging like oh okay this is what I'm paying for and then this is where it can come in handy


ya, ya I mean it's only going to get worse honestly because it's uh becoming an older older population, ya


(uh huh) (mmhmm), what was it


ah yes yes yes correct correct correct, ya, so like this like stuff like this that we hear, (mmhmm)


ya, (mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


ya ya, correct correct correct but there has to be a platform where people can just go instead of your agent, uh at the end of the day ah okay say you already bought five five six policies with this agent and then you feel like you feel like something is just not right or your agent is not giving you enough value for entrusting him


so shouldn't you think like okay !wah! I, ya, (mmhmm) , ya and like I I feel ah I feel like uh the the company websites the insurance websites I make a claim it takes me three four weeks five six weeks to go and see uh reflect uh status reflect


the status to be reflected that it was submitted and is being processed, and, day and age like this this is too damn long, ya


ya ya I mean it then you know ya you want to forfeit the whole claiming process cause you need to write down so many thing and then it takes five six weeks, it's , (mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm)


ya , correct correct and at the end of the day we are their clients, ya


and submit


part three negative experience, okay something that you watch or read that give you goosebumps, what was it man,


something that I've watched or read that gave me goosebumps, it's neither if I've never definitely not watched or something I had uh okay what disgusts


oh okay okay , ya ya ya ya ya I almost forgot


but ya I don't know if it's a one off thing I don't know if it's a one off thing ah ya, well it was my birthday then and then uh I was there with my uh, my ex girlfriend and then like uh seven to eight friends celebrating my ya celebrating my birthday and then it was set


set at fort canning park the this very well lit stairs, like just beneath just beneath the stairs right there's this long, walkway, so we're just seated there and then we're just having drinks and stuff, and then uh uh the night


we were we were going through the night it was like about an hour through the night, and then uh suddenly one of my friend, uh looks up, and see something and then he turns turns around to another friend, and then just uh just as he's about to open his mouth the other friend uh punched him in the thigh


that's like you see you don't speak of it kind of thing, so uh that's when uh after the punch then everyone got alerted lah say say just say why you just punch for nothing because we don't know what's going on what, so we all look at this guy who just punched lah then he's like uh guys you know what uh it's time for us to leave it's not safe being here


ya just left the place, so then we went to uh and then sat there and then was like why why did you you just ask us to suddenly leave cause we had a lot of drinks a lot of stuff to pack, to shift over, this was at about three four AM


I don't think it really matters what I was drinking probably just water, and ya soft drinks right so what happened was after we shifted over, and then uh okay so ya so so dude why why make all of us shift


it's like uh dude you realise this is the seventh months right means that ya, so okay then uh it was a lunar month, , (mmhmm) and then he said and then, said there was something uh standing on top the tree


like a white figure and then uh it just so happens that it that whatever he they saw, was looking at my ex girlfriend and then I check with her so what are you running your period or something then she was like ya I having my period also, nah


I yup but then there are certainly there are there were there were two of them that saw it so


apparently it's a figure that is very famous in ya local site, correct correct, correct ya it, attested to the to the malay folklore lah, correct correct have you seen any of your


, ya ya ya fatimah rocker lah , ya, ah that's what it's called lah, okay moving on


moving on uh was there any event that made you very very, angry or like super frustrated has there been one, uh lately


(uh huh) (uh huh) (uh huh), (uh huh), uh these are all like very these are pet peeves ah


correct correct correct, exactly it it's just, okay, ah yes, correct this is the one that gets me when they stand right in front of the door


ya, (uh huh), okay okay but it's the it's the random old person also but then they I I think you can close one eye


isn't it (mmhmm)


fair enough, ah yes, actually it it gets to me that that there there hasn't been uh, proper cultivation of the habit of


hawker centre returning, yup yup yup yup yup yup, (mmhmm)


right right right, (uh huh) (uh huh), right, eh have you ever come across a, like a, like a random person like just spitting spitting on the floor spitting on the train I've seen people spitting on the train


is it uh what (uh huh), like ya even even this morning there I just saw like uh uh spit stain ah, ya this morning I saw is, uh how would I know when and this this morning I saw a spit stain on at the lift lobby in my place


I'm like but why, no I haven't, ah haven't haven't, uh, I guess we have our own movie called Anniyan lah where


(mmhmm) ya that's true unless, unless


so what's your greatest fear, (mmhmm), exactly very deep question


okay okay, my greatest fear ah it's like that, this uh , I guess it will be, being impaired uh let's say I have a new injury and then like at one point in life


you know I'm not able to use it or like you mentioned just now the blind uncle who was perfectly, able at one point and then suddenly you know he has visual impairment, so it's like that kind of things that you know that it's unforeseen, ya


and and your life revolves three sixty when it happens you know, I mean your life changes three sixty sorry, when that happen right, , (mmhmm)


ya correct correct ya, ya, correct and then will people be people around you be able to accept you for what you have become and or will they look at you as a as a burden uh physically financially


(mmhmm), (mmhmm)


okay okay, (mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm), okay (mmhmm)


!wow! (uh huh) right


ya it going losing limbs, (mmhmm)


(mmhmm) (mmhmm) (mmhmm), right


ya ya, so he really soldiered on ah


okay okay, you were what sorry


he had a resolve lah, you know this is what you appreciate in this kind of people but


this this is the good side you see in life but then there's also the bad side right like people are the people, where got this kind of thing happens right they become depressed they become depressed and then the harm themselves in many way you know, like I I don't know if you recall lah I told you that time I saw this uh this lady