money you know, that's not necessary, if you're willing to learn, if you're willing to know, err we can have the way, so ya, so that's that's a bit of a sharing that, err is very good that when you put it very nicely just now know


a job is important to you not the money can be in other ways, ya but for me , for me, job, is, important if it's meaningful, with a purpose


but even though as not as an employee, If I get money through that, thank god, but , like you said, we we can, we can if you know how to get the money coming in


that's good enough, ya


ya ya that's why you know, ya


at all


millennials ya, ya


ya, ya, ya


ya, ya, I think , it's a, oh ya we we


we have drinks, ya I think that the, the work life balance err they try to promote you know, a healthy lifestyle


and those kind of things right I just err, in my opinion, yea it's a distraction, for the reality that we are, are going to face in our life right now, because


base on experience, like you said is true, the balance is , the individual themselves you know it's not based on the system it's not based on the program


but the individual themselves who actually utilize, concept, of the work life balance yea, but , you know most most of them


tryna say it uh, eight to five, those are nine to six, ten to seven, then they try to reason out with you that , oh you you still got time for your family you know


but err for me, the time, was actually used , to, in to be invested, for, the day after so for example let's say I work from ten to seven


(ppb) I go home by the time I reach home I'll give my time until eight, and then, the rest of the time, is actually to be invested for rest, so that I can be energetic tomorrow, right (ppb) yea so they say you know spend time more with your


family yea de yea de yea de yea de but , at the end of the day, the work life balance they trying to promote err doesn't , equates to how they picture it to be so for example I was working on shift before


and, there's there's there's no there's no balance in a way that, you no need to come work early but you need to punch out late, I'm twenty nine this year but working age I'm forty four


plus overtime lah, that's that's the thing about, people, try to advocate so much promote work life balance, and they try to push all these err documentation you know like HR can you actually err do a program for work life balance


you know and then and then the HR must do overtime, yea so yea for me it's err there's in Singapore you you can't, find work life balance unless you want to have a work life balance


yea it's actually what you want so I made that decision, not to employed anymore and to work, money , myself, because I don't want it to be a tradition, it's it's actually quite sad


it being a tradition , be it we are different culture or different race but it's a tradition that way you know, when you wake up in the morning, and after that send your kids to school, then you go to work, and everyday you go go in go out


there's no changes at all, know, and you don't get to explore or discover yourself, ya is always like, this is me, this is what my my boss like I to be


I need to put tray disc, I never get to discover the true you your true potential you know, ya it's it's it's for me it's a bit restrictive lah, uh that way we are trying to be very safe in every manner, uh you know like err especially while we are in this country


whatever you say whatever you do you know you need to very restrictive, and even that you try to apply to your kid you know when your kid ah, is very smart you know my kid you know he remembers the lyric of a song, he will sing in the bus everybody will look right


and then, be quiet be quiet people don't like, but actually, do we know that the people don't like, ya because people tell us that people don't like, we are very restrictive to our kids, so when I learn about that err


a bit of the parenting skills right, I feel is a bit err, not right lah, your kids try to, say the rhymes you know the riddles to make you happy to tell them that to get a compliment from you


but then they get shh be quiet you know people are looking at you don't embarrass me you know, ya, but then you then your kid also when he grow up he will also tell you to , but then when he tell you to his kid you become a grandparent right, you hear that you say


never mind, is a bit hypocritical ya be hypocrite you know, ya


but do you think that is because the grandparents, actually just want to, experience back the times when, they have us as kids you know, you know that the grandparents see, our kid


as us, and they try to rectify, try to rectify the the issue that they have with us


oh okay, they become the mediator


yea I think that it is err actually quite true lah, err in a in a in a context that, the grandparents, know they, they base on how much time they have left, their assumption on how much time they have left


you know, just like my parents, sometimes we try to applied their ways, but at the end of the day they tell us that's not the right way


because we use to experience that way, and we thought that it's effective because, we are actually err either we go against err no, either we go, with the flow, or we just knew that okay it's right listen


when we try to apply and they hear eh it's not the right way lah you know, so then we ask them but you did this to me before, yea but, I now I see it's wrong, then but but I see that it becomes as a curriculum or a lesson whereby


you know nowadays right, it becomes an intellectual err options, for us to actually take note, and actually err, give tips to other parents that, whatever happens to us in the past doesn't make it reality right now


know, talking about like being a, the parents being abusive to the kid, the personal experience that they have so they will also become abusive to the kid you know, they telling that okay this is actually probably, err what a kid must go through because I went through


and actually my kid also must go through this you know, so err I think, base on that it can become a curriculum, for parents to actually talk to one another you know like are a parent I'm a parent


no when we talk to another we share about our personal experience what we go through, that even can actually be more , how should I say it can be err more beneficial because is base on experience


ya not just a a textbook kind of tips, ya not just a textbook kind of tips, ya because I also ever saw, like parents, I send my kids to , school, childcare infant care you know


but, I I what I can see through my experience, that some parents, at such early age they want to see their child become very competitive


ya very competitive so I even ask my wife my wife is a teacher you know, I ask her to post this question to her group of friends and even the management so let's say in a class there's twenty kids, so you give


all this kids, a set of question, and see how they perform, ended up all of them get full marks, but there's one issue that they have, who to put number one who to put number twenty


so we, they decide, err in a secretive way, to put it under, chronological order of their names, but the parents was very unhappy, err like the parent of the first one


said that, oh it it was it was this way you know the parents of the first one said, what the what are the question you asked my kid, his number one so what are the questions, unhappy right, the number twenty, sorry fifteen first fifteen they they they take three three parts fifteen the survey was


err number fifteen, so how well did number sixteen and number fourteen do, the number twenty, the number twenty, was very surprising, oh my child got number twenty it's okay he got full marks actually he is right


then my wife say that, what is your agenda asking me to do all this set of test as she said because, can't you see that, there's a rising number of suicide right now, in younger generation do we have do we hear that during our time


yes but not as frequent it's very rarely, right now even with Facebook with this social media you get to hear it as often, so I said, is the grading system, gonna ensure that this kids gonna have that kind of reality in their future


you know, uh I I I'm not saying that you know , putting someone as number one, or putting them as number twenty is wrong, but what do you what is the meaning for them to be in that position


do you actually credit them for trying their best, you know can the teachers by a mediator, err for parents, to actually talk to their child how is it the way not we trying to be smart to the parents


you know but actually parents, also sometime we are guilty of that you know we're try to be smart like say !aw! I know lah my child I know how to take care you know, but actually in a way that if we need help in this area we really need help


ya because, our personal family friend had their kid not jump down, but err depression, ya depression at err age of if I'm not wrong she is only nine


depression you know, that's quite sad, she's a very smart girl only she's a bit different, she can't stop talking, that's all bit err hyperactive lah but she's very smart very intelligent


ya, I believe that, you know parents err if they get a chance to go for parenting forum or, conference activities with other parents they should get themselves involved


you know some some we we did by just asking why why would you not like to get involved, oh I I don't want other parents to like, be nosy about my


how I handle my child you know, and I also no lah I got no time lah want to take want to take note all these things you know, you see the result of it ah, it doesn't it doesn't happen in our parent's time


because, to say in a Singlish manner right, these parents there's a good thing that they Kaypoh, err about each other you know but, in a way we see that as, nosy but, they're actually caring for


eh why your child like that is he okay right no right, oh this one nevermind nevermind don't don't say anything let the parents take care (ppb) we don't say later we say then we get scolded, but last, they in the past it was, superb lah


fantastic, ya ya ya


yea, short, term err temporary solution, yea


guided yes


so err you put it in a way that you know, I think target setting is also very important, goal settings for your kids, so that they have a direction, on where they want to go


however the motivating factor like I said encouragement is also very important in a way that hey you know this is the target, what is your target lah, simple say ah what is your target, maybe if the target falls below the


criteria, maybe we can encourage them say that okay this is the criteria, so err why not you try hard to reach a bit above the criteria, if you fall you know you you shoot for the stars if you fall you fall on the clouds


right so err I think that's this is an ongoing educational, err type of pay you know it we need to, keep on talking repeat you know err to to educate


ya enforce ya, because this is this is some of the sad parts I saw, because err that day we had a learning experience journey with our kids in the, center, err nursery


so this is what I saw because my my kid was just explaining to me, what he was doing, so there's this the other kid who was actually , trying to look at what my, son is doing, so the the


one of the parent, just then eh, focus focus focus on what you do don't don't don't don't look at others, then he was a bit err scared, err disappointed also because err because he could not comprehend and understand what is actually supposed to be done


so, maybe in the past you know, people thought that, by just looking you are know copying, you are not err doing err things yourself, but nowadays I think is quite a trend by just


you know not I not I say that err it's permissible to copy people's work, but you know duplicating the process , say eh say this person can do this, why not I try the same method but do it my own way, you know try the same method do it my own way


so that we also will end up achieve the same result lah, ya, but , my son, was just telling this boy come sit down with me it's okay, like in his own way like come come come come just sit down you know


and the mom was really furious err so I I had a talk with the ma I said uh, I think I, you need to relax a bit, ya because uh, these kids uh they're trying to, learn how what be maybe your kid you know learn how people do it


and just see it and do it you know some of the kids are like that you know, cause my my son is different, my son is a bit different he learns through uh, memory, he learns through photograph pictures you know visual, ya he's not good in verbal speech


but err that that's how we appreciate, ya is how we appreciate how they learn, at the end of the day, err there's this one method that I learnt from, he collect his friends, this one good in this right he make friend then later he have to do that he become err


err the jack of all trade master of one, ya so that's quite interesting I learn from him, ya


what you mean


tour


situational


here


so instead of like, wiping them out taking them as noises, right now they should actually apply, a way that deals our voices, you know not just like noises by the side you know


in between yes there will be a black sheep, you know just you know just want to be heard out just to complain only right ya but some are really valid but, they are swept under the carpet, you know just being brush off


making , making them, err involved in a rash act because, they try to be rational, giving feedbacks you know so all the things all boil up already, at the end of the day this good person


doing rash act, ya but actually is not bad person you know because of, the boil up lah, ya, I think this country need to practice some flexibility, err in, certain ways


not that I say that we are really a communism, but err we need to be flexible ah to practice in a certain way, because I I saw even , you know , on purpose not driving, err just taking err public err transport just to study and learn


how this err people actually , err react to the governance , options, as simple as the reserve seat, it it it state there reserved seat


but end up people, not see as a privilege but entitlement, you know from far you know, can even chase and run but suddenly when come up to the sick seat already the leg bent you know, uh but from far can drive can aim already you know, based at the four corners of this (ppb) cabin (ppb) err that I want to invade


my know you're invading my space you know know that place give it to me, yea so, ended up when we don't give, nowadays only lah viral and everything you know, oh this guy end up, no you might say that guy is being healthy because I saw this guy actually he was he was


he was having a, migraine, perfect in a suit tie but he was under migraine so he just decide to sit on the reserved seat, knock off, I saw when he come in he was like dozing off so


I just hold him I just tell him sit down lah, from far you know come this Wonder Woman , with the gray hair, ah really little lady walking really fast, and tell that guy hey get up this is err for me


so that guy was like a bit unwilling he just wake up like, very shocked, say like uh I'm sorry I'm having a migraine, no no no you see, she even pointed that that's me there in the poster so I was thinking where is she in the poster you know


the the, doesn't speaks a lot about her lah she has all the energy for five minutes to be angry, suddenly cannot stand and she just, three stops away, yea that guy came down with me after, eight stop


yea, so I think that's that's about, that's about it you know, the they they think about, rights and everything you know, I think these old people is due to the experience


the stress level of the environment, I also can't really blame that old woman I don't know what she's been through the day, she decide okay this is the point of time that I am going to be angry uh uh maybe for the past, how many uh hours right she's not angry she's relaxed okay this is the time I want to take my chance I need to be heard


but I see that in my dad you know I actually pity him he's been serving for thirty two years, for in government sector, all he get was just a golden handshake, you know and then ended up


having getting paid by his own money five hundred five hundred five hundred every month you know then, he asked me is is this life fair actually, so I said to him, err it's not your fault, you are born in the era that


that is your only option, but it will be my fault If I, tell myself, your option is my only option, so many options right now, this world you know, so I say to my, I I remember my dad ask why you decide to just leave the workforce


err stay be stay at home and earn money from home you know I said to him, cause I've seen you not that because I want to blame you I pity you, you been working so hard, you know, but at the end of the day, you just ask yourself is that what I really want


see the sum all the old people I saw I I I I walk with him ah, C P F building, people were just shouting they save everything for their money you know, know like give my money give my money, so err I told them I told my dad, retirement is not sixty five


you know that's my my my strong opinion, because my retirement is when you know, err when you reserve to be retired, you know, this this the program I told my dad you see this is the problem that we having


this been program, you know but nowadays, this program doesn't really work, for the younger generation for the future you know, people see that there are so many options out there this world is for us to discover and explore


I I ask my dad you know, during your time, most of your life spent as a kid what do you know, playground, Sepak-Takraw football lah, but nowadays the kids know about hot air balloon in Turkey


you know these kid know about Disneyland they experience you know, because why, because nowadays we looking forward towards that you know and mostly he's religious, you know so I told him that there's a lot of, time that I want


my strong age, I call it strong age (ppb) err, I want to be part of this beautiful journey, not when you're old you try to get up the star cruise , go there aeroplane with your baggage you know, !wow! lah I'm already seventy I got no energy already but I want to do it you know


I told him not many people got that kind of privilege you know, to be at that age to be strong, what are we doing with our time right now you know, so he understand know, err he's also encouraging me


to continue you know, doing what I'm doing because he saw the difference, he saw that he said I I told him we have to break the chain in our tradition in our family you know, I told him that because we we come from a poor family, he cannot be that during your time you were poor you know


uh Chinese chambers uh the Indian chambers, ah we go there we we fill up form right then we go home we pray we expect them the form to be approved, I told him this is not at the way anymore


you know we living in a world that by this form we must tell them they do not exist you know, it's been a tradition because, from the father, to the son, ah not to the holy ghost ah to the others one to the daughter or to the next generation right you know it been a tradition where by


cause I I used to live in a apartment whereby it's all rental rental place, and literally says like that, I say to them eh, come ah we we make some extra money, never mind never mind my mother already told me, this Saturday go to MSF fill in form


then err next week get err approval then wait one more week to get the money, really, I was quite shocked really, don't we want to bake break this tradition


err I told them we have to break this tradition is is not the way that we gonna live, err our life, ended up we complain err this people come from this country take my job, then I say to them they want to take the job they go and take lah


it's it's they've been blessed with you know it's their child's opportunity they go and take, but right now you got the opportunity to stand up on your own feet, you everyday stay at home and watch TV, oh you dose your days off you know watch the TV err then like the TV gonna bring you all the money in the world know can bring you all the goodness


then you waste your life, err box, in front of the box you know err then you pretend that you have money you know when you have a little bit of money you pretend you come and go McDonalds, but five dollar meal only ah


don't have the angus burger ah don't fool around ah no extra pine apple pie no ice cream, just the happy meal, then got the toy little bit, ah happy, ah then next week pretend again ah come let's go KFC ah we as family the bucket meal ah


then see other people eat burger right okay we order bucket show them we got money try to up, out outperform that person in a meal you know so I I we had some of this problem we told them, we have to live the life of being pretentious


ya pretentious in the way that you know, eh life is good we don't need help, come, err just do our own way don't disturb people just work ourselves quiet you know live in our house we don't make noise, we live then after that we live on our lives then after that we die


so I said, this are the kind of tradition that actually mould us, to become what I call a lamp post, err this is my so call err way of looking at people you know no once going to the lift right


press their house level, and they quiet they don't talk to the neighbour you know, oh when the neighbour say ah hi good morning, know they scared the neighbour gonna ask them you know what you do ah


so hows your day know, and they they scared to answer you know they they they don't talk anymore, and, it anywhere also you know, try to be gracious ah they're so scared of that because why, they're scared that


when they say something wrong they're gonna be rejected, if they do something right they're scared that they're not accepted, err so I I believe I I learn this way from a very err particular place, err that's in err Malaysia actually but it's in a


a those a non urban areas Kampong areas you know, I learn that I learn how come this person, know hat neighbour at that side, and I ask this person you know, eh where you did this , I think is a water turbine thing you know


okay err to generate err electric ah it's very smart, said oh from where which company no ah from that guy over there, then I'm like thinking, that guy over there do for you ya, so err that guy know this one he work in which company no lah all the people around there they know how to do all help you


then I was thinking like !wow!, is it because they talk to each other, they network with each other, that they actually have this kind of harmony living, you know harmony living even though they they they live, in a middle income lah not not very wealthy some of the side very wealthy


but this area, so I I investigate you know I try to investigate so I ask, what do you do to get to know all of these people, she just say that, first you just, you know talk to them, and


tell them , eh I'm having this you can help me a not find people, in a way that these people also, eh this this person right, want to me ah why not I just talk to them, ya I think we need to recreate


not Singapore don't have we just need to recreate, this err culture you know of working together you know, of communicating with each other you know, live harmoniously, err whereby we are not scared that


when we hear our neighbour coming hello good morning how are you, then we like just slam the door, no no no uh nothing nothing nothing I just want to, ya I mean there are some people that way, is it true that that way means you cannot go the better way


it means that, just leave it at the person lah he's like that, no you know that kind of thing, err whereby in in an office you know he's like that lah never mind lah don't, don't disturb him lah, but is it better that come let's continue to


rope him into our group, err continue to talk to him, make sure that he's within the, community, so there's no office politics, but they start to label though, uh that one is a strange guy


that one is the much Kaypoh, err that one is the err Makan Makan aunty always bring all the food eh come come come, come come come come come ah this one some of the voucher this one the business aunty doing some online business promote the product or service you know


so like, when we we walk past by them right, we only try to find people that err can just gel with us, know gel with us, oh this one my kind, then that that one ah that's put aside that's brush him out


then after that we create the culture for our kids, ya, so, I don't teach my kids lah, you know the term don't talk to strangers, I just told him that


just be aware of who you, so that's why if if you see him you say ah hi good morning uncle no matter what you know that person right because lah in the past when we see this you know it's not our uncle right


keep quiet, so then I realise when my sister got in an accident, the uncle that I never talk to he help me, he help the family you know, aunty send to hospital everything, uh prepaid the bill because we were kids we follow him in his car


no parents from work rushing right, then after that need to err before warded need to pay everything right he pay deposit, that's how, I I remembered you know, eh maybe that's the way you know, that we actually are supposed to


our life you know, like you know , I I'm trained in CPR you know I was a lifeguard, so then there's this guy who actually , he got a heart pain, no like he suddenly collapse lah but he never die lah


then my friend was like I told him eh come lah we eh no no no no don't disturb don't disturb call the ambulance then I say oh my goodness, is this the way that, we actually err live our life you know, err later we scared we touch ah because


scared kenna sue , ah I'll be blame you know but we really want to try to do it, you know so I told him come lah let, but fortunately along the way, err this guy say I'm a doctor I say okay lah we just help the doctor to just cordon off


then he do the CPR and everything lah until the ambulance came, so, that's the thing you know, about this culture a bit like you know eh touch me right, little brush off only ah because the train is full right ah okay molest, ah okay ah this one


you know, like, I I don't know, err is it based on, or I got no money I got take chance ah sue people, like that right don't drive anyhow kenna bang you know


other country, ya


ya ya, ya


ya, ya


true, we got many got less


ya, ya ya ya


think that's that's cool, ya


ya, ya to groom the, kids right, ya lah I also don't err, I would say it's true you know the how you actually


explain to them what you are actually doing you know how you can benefit you know, so like err I explain err to my kid you know, even though he's just four, so I just explain to him you know what is doing right now is to benefit others


err is actually to err make others realise that , this life, is not just what they thought is life is about, there's so much more to it, you know


let's say errI put in err then he was, he's he's four but he's asking, ah he don't ask in a very, so err I told him, that


being a benefit to others, ya, it is a responsibility, that , we must actually , carry out, as a principle in our life


because, I told him to watch the bird, know I bring him out you know, I bring him out to the, err outdoor, so I told him, you see there's a worm inside the


pile of soil, the bird knows it, but why does the bird, need to make the effort, to actually take the, worm, out from the soil


then give to the babies, know not that he understand lah, so I just explain to him like he's an adult I just taught him that, actual actually benefiting the, soil the plant in a natural manner


it also benefit the babies, you know you know some of this err plants and, soil don't have the benefit of having pesticides, ah but so the bird is the natural one, gonna take it out, and the kid


you know can't fly, so, I don't know whether he understood then he said, oh !aiya! good job, so he compliment me lah, so it is been it is been nice talking you to today and knowing you ya for


ya good experience as parent to parent thank you


I can see there's a buy ten get one free on my side


okay , I think on your side there is two, two pins, for the bowling while my side do not have


ya mine is called err Ben


okay your guy is standing still, while my guy is , jumping all over the place


okay while my potato one is intact, one is already, taken out, empty, yes (ppb)


okay mine is err cutting down the tree


okay while mine is err, I think just aiming not shooting yet


very well done, K I think for my side the wind is too strong, so, I think one of the flag is missing


K what else difference is there, I think my stripes


!huh! ya yes you are right, K mine got one


I think one nice extra ship looking on the other direction


looks like it though


okay, are we supposed to look at the other photo, okay let's go uh


oh yes, K you got two directions I got four directions


mine says err Shine in the Dance Contest


on the top left, on the, bottom left, the Thursday late night shop


it's a pet show, K I do not have any of such event, K mine uh there's a sign at the


at the shop window I think mine says uh all bets are on, and the next one mine says natural energy pills


but I think mine don't have for guys only for girls, mine is uh, I T tips, from Bill-Gates, so maybe it's a different book


so I think mine is uh, another day it's says sell celebrity gossip, uh I think initially he is holding a teddy bear


to my top left finish the pie, I think for the designer fashion, think mine still got shoes for there is three shoes, three pairs of shoes


it's supposed to be how many, there's eleven right now, so yes supposed to be twelve, think just stick to eleven [huh]


okay, so the previous one we got


okay, okay uh, how many siblings do you have, who are you close to


think the last I cry is quite, recently, I saw a movie, uh I got reminded of my late father, uh which, literally character do you most identify with


okay


worst date, I don't think I got any worst date, but I mean I've tried to know someone, and then uh, the person just walk away


but that was, many many years ago lah , K how long has it been since your last, serious relationship, since your last


serious relationship


saddest moment of my life uh, is when my father pass away ah, what are you willing to devote your time, and energy, to without getting paid


most inspiring book, I'm inspired by, usually, leaders uh, I've read LKY before, I've read Mahatir before


I think I would be most inspired by LKY lah, to a certain extent, uh to a certain extent not everything he does I agree but, yea he did, good things lah


uh nothing political lah just uh, ya just his views, okay uh


how do you know when to let go of someone


who is my hero that means !huh!, a celebrity or a family member or, anything ah, okay uh, if is a family member the hero will be my late father, I think I take certain things from him


in terms of, try to make decisions using your mind more than your heart, try to be firm, that one I take from my father in terms of, celebrity I think err Alex-Ferguson


cause I support Manchester-United, in term of Ferguson because he build the team, he took the team while they are still down, uh he almost got sack, but manage to stay on for twenty six years so


ya is like a, do not give up, even under difficult situations ah and you must lead to lead many mans, with different personality and all that I don't think is an easy job, ya so that's why my


uh ya sometime you need to do that also lah especially now , okay err describe an experience, when you were match made, or went on a blind date


I think because uh you got too many choices right so you don't need to go to be match made or go on blind date


okay, deal breaker in search of a partner


I think I gone through quite a few, the deal breaker is, I think I reached a certain age, when I first initially I intend to get married at


twenty seven, then after that due to financial situation you know in Singapore ah, so, push back the date to thirty and I told myself, whichever girl is with me when I'm, twenty five, that should be


the girl lah so, some way some how when I'm twenty five, the people that I know somehow only left, this girl so, I stick to, that girl uh


so I know her for five years, then I got married, so that's the girl who is with me still lah, so that's the deal breaker the deal breaker is my age


what is the craziest thing, you have ever done


just the craziest thing, okay, so you say that it's the craziest thing so are you saying that what you make the decision you never think properly


okay, your turn ya, top three in my bucket list


I think trying to be practical will be, to reach the retirement sum, set by, C P F, that's one, another one would, maybe to have, more kids


I only have one so hopefully have, the next one will be, I hope to, get at least a degree in life ah, so that is my top three, bucket


okay , why are you looking for a partner


is there anyone at this table, ya so I don't think we have any choice, so, looks like we would have to, keep on talking, we are getting to know each other better, and maybe know ourselves better also


for you what are your top three childrens


the last time I have a meaningful conversation, I think will be with my wife ah so basically is like, every day talking to her, uh is something meaningful lah, uh so, okay lah we sometimes we talk nonsense


we make each other laugh but it's uh meaningful in a way, cause that's how we bond, how, how we communicate, so that helps us , a lot ah so is seeming uh anything that I talk with her is


meaningful lah, next question for you is uh how well can you cook or bake


I think it's very important for me, I enjoy looking after my five year old kid now, so, I think so far, is a very meaningful journey uh it changed me as a person


cause initially I thought even my wife thought I'll be the, the fierce one with my kid, but somehow it's, changed uh my kid is more afraid of my wife than me


last time when we were single when we got to know each other my wife is the one who, can play with kids mix around with kids whereas uh I don't really, know how to play with kids like get their attention all that but after having my kid my kid is like


getting my full attention, I play things with him things that I don't see myself doing I also do, basically sometime like he is, he is my boss uh he tell me to do things and I still do I don't know why don't really enjoy


at at times but, of all it's fun lah, is a wonderful experience so yes it's very important for me to have kids, K so for you is uh what nicknames do you go by


which is your favourite, so only one and that's the only favourite, okay


If I got ten million dollars, tomorrow, one thing maybe I won't look out for such, opportunity, to earn some money that is one, uh other than that uh, I would set aside some


for savings, so maybe out of ten million maybe, three million put for savings, for my family and myself, the rest of the seven million, maybe err, ya three million is just nice ah my wife one million me one million


my son one million I will give my mother one million I will give my younger brother one million, so that's five already gone another five million maybe, two million for charity, then the other three million, is to for my relatives and whoever that


I know give them some just help help them out lah whatever I can with, what do you miss most from your childhood


personal trait of myself, at times I think I care too much about, about others


it can be, simple stuff like you know I want to do something it can be simple okay going out for lunch, I want to eat something particular, then I'll be like, if I'm with anyone I will just ask


okay so what you all want to eat then we'll be thinking of the majority whatever they want to go so I will just follow, like it's, one thing that I don't like about myself even with my family or even with my friends it's always the same thing


how do you know that you truly love your partner


the most embarrassing moment of my life err, cannot remember, but I know there is some, think the most embarrassing moment was when


I remember I, went somewhere, walking around, without realising that actually my pants, is torn, uh so uh


is quite a big, big tear I think, so how what did I got, to know that is torn is as I was walking then people were looking at me and, smiling, like you see when they smile I also smile you know just being courteous


but it got odd when there is this, one, guy who dress up like a lady, and he gave she or he gave me a funny look, then I got worried I say why is, why is the he or his, smiling at me that way then I realise oh shit my


my pants is torn so that is the most embarrassing moment, if you could turn back time, what is the one thing you would have done differently


most valued possession, I think my most valued possession is, the people I love, how do I get it, I got my wife by getting married to her, I got my


I got my son, by, consummating with my wife, so that is how I get , so I, my loved ones my mother my


brother so this are my most, important possession lah, what is the most important lesson, that you have learnt from your parents


I thought we're not supposed to mention any, uh maybe another person's name can ah okay uh so his name I must make it generic ah , my closest friend is uh Shake, how is he special


I've known him since, uh secondary one, so we has, start together, we were, there was a period of time that, I was concentrating on taking care of my family that I did not contact any of my friends


so basically my point of time in life was, uh that time is uh I take care of myself, part time studies then I take care of my, so he comes to the crunch when, I'm getting married, so of course need to look for my


best man lah then I was like eh I got no one who I can task to be my, my best man, ah even when I got engaged also I never contact any of my friends to to come, so I contacted, this friend again


and surprisingly, instead of like he is being angry that I never contact him or what he, he said, he knows that when I'm keeping quiet, there's something that I need to take care of, so, he never said no he never question what he just ask me


when is your wedding day I need to take leave, ah so he he did that for me he became my best man, for my marriage, then since, then the friendship, uh continue, again so up to now


we always contact each other every year we make it a point to at least, uh meet once so we, we went for family holidays together we, go do activities together ah even our kid, actually he got married earlier but his first kid and my kid


is of the same age, so we can, share tips lah and it's quite lucky also lah our, our wives also can get along quite well, he's a good friend to to have even when, I have to go NS


uh reservist that time cause my, my younger brother is, special he got fits and all that, so I I'm worried because only my, mother taking care of him, so usually before I go for reservist, I'll make sure like things like uh groceries is all there everything is there so that my mother don't need to


go out of the house just make sure he's always at home with my younger brother so when my this friend got to know, uh don't remember if anything liking or what, tell my mother or my wife to call him or his wife, they'll be willing to help


so is not like I ask him to help me he he just said anything just tell him he will be willing to help, uh he's just there so his, the special thing, that I have with him ah


what do you value most in a friendship


there's too many food, to eat, (ppb) okay, who will I want to eat with


I think the best ah is for me, I go and book, a restaurant buffet, so that will be my last meal because I would want to have, have a taste of all the food for one last time, I don't want to remember only one


so seafood have all kinds of err desserts and all that, so that will be my last meal who will I want to have my last meal with I think it will be my family, I close friends, most probably my relatives those who are


who know me since young, most probably those are the people lah, K this one is about food also, what do you most like to eat in the whole wide world


Kway-Teow


so in Singapore don't have ah


and they're saving cost, maybe health promotion board say healthier food, my true home


my true home ah, Singapore , there's no other place I call home other than Singapore, never intend to migrate, never intend to


he never even stay, anywhere, longer than one year overseas, unless I go for holiday so if you say, truly home is is Singapore lah, cause to me this is where my friends are this is where my family are even though certain things is


a bit irritating right now, a bit not I feel not in, my favour or maybe most Singaporean's favour, but after is my home ah hopefully things will change for the better, either somewhere somehow


things will change, and I believe we can change ah, if you knew you could not fail, what would you go accomplish


what would you go accomplish


with a special ability, I would want to be like professor X able to read people minds, not to control them, but more like, to understand how people truly think


and from there, will help me to make decisions that will be that will be, beneficial to, the majority ah I cannot please everyone but by knowing more, about people sometimes people talk to you you know they can look like so


everything is nice and then they but If I can control, certain things then I can know okay actually this person is feeling that way so the other person is thinking this way it helps me to come to a, more workable and


uh amicable way of doing things ah, how do you want to be remembered


so this one is a deal maker, the deal maker, I think for my one the deal maker is she, can Tahan me ah she I mean she can stand


my, my behaviour my character, I believe my character is, K lah maybe humble lah but I think my character is a bit hard, for, anyone to accept


but err I think he he knows me he's willing to put up with me, I can get very particular even for the smallest of things, sometimes I might seem, I don't bother, you want to do whatever you want to do you do


but he bother to keep on asking are you sure you don't bother, err so he he knows me lah so I think that is the, characteristic that my wife have, that help that is the dealmaker lah


okay, how would you react if a close friend express his or her romantic feelings for you


who or what irritates me, who, usually the one who irritates me is my loved ones, what irritates me is, I don't like being tickled, so


sometime it just irritating you know like err when I, while I eating or while I'm reading a book or watching TV then if my kid come and, like, tickle me or touch anywhere that is ticklish it will like totally uh make me lose my mood uh so I can even like


uh so sometime is like I think I'm asking for it lah so maybe god make it a way, you like to tickle people right so you will be irritated by people tickling you


what activity, do you most enjoy doing together with your family


what motto I live by, I think would just say just try my best, in, everything, in life


I mean when in life you are so called, you are given, a pack of cards that is your life I mean your life situation is your like that, your parents is who they are, uh so just make the full use of your


ability, your capability, also, I believe everyone is different, each person will look at success differently


just do your best uh, maybe to you is a success to another person would be success means to have the five Cs the cars the cash and whatever, so, can lah so just try your best in every in anything you do ah, be it yourself


get yourself, whatever you can, you can do and like you say err we have a purpose in life, each person have their purpose in life, so whatever is your purpose in life you don't know


I think deep down if let's say if you keep looking at yourself you look at your situation, eventually you will know what is your purpose in life lah so just just go ahead, until the end of time


describe the happiest moment of your life


as long as nothing goes wrong I mean not halfway leaving, not halfway, uh quarelling with each other, you can spend time happily doing anything can be watching a movie can you just walk uh taking a walk can be


just baiting so the perfect day is just everything, goes smoothly, uh even if anything goes wrong the mood of, myself and my date, is okay we can laugh it off, so I think that is the perfect date ah


if you could have an hour long conversation with anyone at all, who would you talk to


you are the one who separate the card you purposely right , okay lah never mind later we swap ah, K err, sign up with a dating agency


I never considered it at all, I don't think based on my current status I can consider it, I can consider to do it also lah so no


describe one important life lesson, you've learned from the books you've read


what stresses or destresses me, I think life will stress me up


because I don't think life, they consider who you are if they decide to be, to be, troublesome they decide to be, difficult it will make your life


difficult and really stressful lah so what is, the thing that stress my life is err, my my family lah err so is, thinking for their future planning ahead, so that stresses me up, so what is


the thing about their life is also linked to what is the current life situation, so that stress me up what would destress me is also my family because my, my kids eh my kid and my wife, they can destress me


sometime when I'm very angry or what I think with my kid it's like, can just like, a flip, I can be so angry at one at one end then the next, end I'll be like so happy like nothing happen so he can distress me


at the same time maybe stress sometimes when he push me like ah I want this I want you to do that I say can wait later no now now now okay so do, then at the same time after doing it so angry when you give to him he will just say uh thank you


uh !aiya! come beside me ah I like you to be beside me no ah then like !wah! then distress already so he can make me stress and make me distress , K


if you had one more year to live, what would you change about your life now


but you're perfectly healthy right, so no need to change so much lah a bit only lah, very important


to me when we, when we take the, the vow the the vow or the, is a responsibility, basically someone else, life is in our hands


at the same time I'm signing my life to someone else, of course people say can there can be, we can go separate ways divorce and all that, but I don't think we, we go into a marriage, thinking about separation, ya so is a


is very important to me lah, hopefully it will last until, one of us err go, what value do you bring to other people's lives


yes, yes


yes, okay


I think multiply, no need to tell the reason right, okay I just multiply lah, okay uh, do you enjoy doing chores


which is your most, and least favourite chore, any household chores


both most and least, okay


okay, what risk I've taken for someone I love, going against the person I love


family, so that is the, the biggest risk, cause, because they, you know when you go against someone you love family is their blood


then when you go against them, things can get really, very bad ah so that's the biggest, biggest risk I took lah, name a favourite place


that you've been to, what is its significance


okay, okay


the two double ah


and then you got the solution


what I like myself, I think my, my brain ah, cause uh, I think when I was younger I was more emotional, I tend to follow my


my feelings more and my heart more, but as days goes by as I got older, I think I learn, to control using the, the mind more so when there is err any decision or any situation


the heart will say do this say this, but the brain will say no no no no say this this is the right thing to see this is right thing to do so he help in certain ways when I'm handling people, I handling my friends I handling my family


handling the public at times because, when sometime when public scold you you tend to get angry you feel like scolding the person but the brain will always come in and say no wait calm down first, listen to the facts, get what is their problem and then solve it


and usually when you get to the problem and then he solve it, the person who scold you will end up, apologizing saying good things about you so it's, it's good for both lah that means your heart also feel good, so the brain is my most favorite trait


K if your house caught fire, and you only had time to save one item, what would you save


to, to get err lady


proper full time job, I mean I used to work office hours, ah because I want to take care of my kid, so I'm basically doing, night shift jobs, ad hoc jobs


so procrastinating in a way that, I know I can do, better and more If I work in a full time job, compare to all this ad hoc job and all that, but err (ppc), in the most


best world will be, I no need to work, ah I just wait then everything all the money will be settled, I just take care of my kid that will be the best lah, but so procrastinating in getting a full time job cause I'm still I want to get a full time job but at the same time I want to take care of my kid so my kid is


more important than my career than my job, so just wait lah keep on waiting and waiting one, important to me is job, not money


If I get job satisfaction I'll be quite okay, without salary, because salary will eventually come somewhere somehow


so that one will be, we will manage ah that means financially can be manage, money can come, even if you don't work, you can get money lah that means


but of course people say you don't work you can get money but at the same time in Singapore if let's say you ask for handouts, ask for assistance you also need to work for it, like I mean you have to, go to the necessary bodies and all that, so to me job is important in the sense that it help


me to, to stay alive in a certain way, if let's say I got totally no job, like, even if you give me the money, most to most I will just be going around, not making use of my full ability and all that


okay, K even If I have money and there's a purpose for it, I will still want a job, so, okay but err with the money will


so then then can ah


but the thing is err for me is like, there will always be ways to, to earn money lah even if you don't have a job, you'll there will always be ways to earn money


there is other ways, so it depends on how we look at it we look at it as a job we look at, in a way lah, it can be a business, it can be begging people for money so is


depend lah I mean to us when we see people begging we say hor begging for money but maybe to that person, this is my only job that I know that I can get money, so it depends on each persons is err interpretation lah


yea because at the end of the day, this people who questions you saying that do you have job, are you really working and all that, when you are in trouble are all these questions will be the one who helping you


so the most important thing to me is, when you make a decision especially if you're a husband if you're a father, the most important thing when you make a decision is, your family members must know, they must have that trust in you, they must uh agree with you


at the end of the day, when you make the decision, I decide to give up, my full time job, I want to go on this freelance mode doesn't matter what kind of job, there will be this stigma example if lets say you ever work


as a, manager or a, quite high post, and then suddenly when you work freelance, then when some people that I know of example used to work in human resource as a manager, then he or she decide to quit so after quitting


then say eh I got no job I got no money coming in, like so I tell him why not you try, take all this part time jobs lah no it doesn't matter it's, you see you got no money right just do data entry or whatever three hours four hours per day you get certain amount of money


but then the person do not want to go, down to that to that level, sometimes I'll just ask so you say what's important you say you got no money, no income coming in this is all the small small income yea but you add it up together you still got some income rather than you don't have


anything at least you get something, but just sit, to not want and all that lah, it all comes down to the individual if lets say you, see the situation I think when you say the Gen-Y decide to keep quiet


I think they are stuck in the middle maybe some of them receive the education, from the Gen-X, so they are program that way who are certain of Gen-Y is actually trying to adapt to the, millennials so that's why they choose to be keeping quiet maybe individual will be


after the millennial then millennial will keep quiet some will be like Gen-Y some will be like the, the future lah but, it all comes down to the person, if you think that you want to survive, you have to be, adaptable of course everybody will have different type of life


Generation-X, during their lifetime it's more about survival, building up, so when they are survive when they managed to survive they are building up, yes I already built up I do not want to demolish everything, full time job everything is being paid I get a fixed income no unpredictability I think that's what


generally what human beings like, human beings generally don't like change, so for Gen-Y, half half, now Gen-Y is feeling eh I cannot be like Gen-X because why now jobs also contract basis three months, one year two years if you ask for permanent job it's really very hard


to get a permanent job, so they are trying to be adaptable to Millenials, so they're trying to look at ways how to survive as for Millenials, I think when they are growing up they are being taught to be yourself, they see maybe


most like I think when when we see the aged people, so old already very stress, work so hard throughout their whole life, then when the time they are too old they couldn't enjoy themselves, so maybe this wake up the millennial to think eh


If I not going to do this enjoying my life, when am I going to do am I going to work hard all my life end up I don't enjoy it, so it's about the meaning, of that, certain individual ah what is it you want if people talk about


work life balance I don't think we can ever find, work life balance, maybe if you say, work life harmony, maybe can maybe if certain times you work hard certain times you, have life balance so balance is like harmony maybe quite possible lah


but usually it turns to be like that I think for generations, they are more, restrictive to the kids, like when when, grandparents are to the kids ah, so the reason is is because, I think it comes down to responsibility


because when your kid is your responsibility to teach him the right values, for grandparents, it's not my responsibility, I just want my my kid to my grandkid to be happy, so let them do whatever they like anything goes wrong the grand the grandparents won't handle it will go back to the


to the parents so it all comes down but to me it all comes down to the responsibility


I think not really about making up for it, because they feel that you know they are old, not much energy I do not want conflict I want to be happy, ya you know when we are young we dare to do all kinds of things, we want to try this try that when you are getting older


if you have heart problem I don't want to take the roller coaster you know because there's a risk so I think the same thing with with kids, ah so when if my my grandkid, if I'm going to scold my grandkid then my grandkid don't want to see me anymore that will be like, oh I'm getting old when will I see my grandkid again so they tend to do


things to maybe cheer cheer up more compared to but it brings a, balance in a certain sense, because, uh they become the mediator so if you are so angry where we want to scold the kid the grandparents will act as a shield calm down


so the grand the, kids will be, uh protected so it's a balance in a certain way I think it's been going on for, for generations it's like that


I think when


that's why you like, you see yourself and your cousin close like brother and sisters K compared to now I don't think is as close ah, I think for this competitiveness is because of


the society the system, in a certain way because meritocracy happen to, to work too well, then after that, we go to the oh we want them to experience learning grades is not important


and all that so it will come down to the, to the parents what is it what is it they want, some parents will think I got here, by studying hard that's the only way, some parents will be thinking like, aiyah no need to study so hard lah as long you can


survive and all that but what is it that you really want, sometime you also know parents ah stress up I couldn't do this, but I want my kid to do this, so at night you want your kid to be you not being, herself or himself, like uh so it all comes down to the


individual lah sometime people we see that I think this person need help, but the person do not want to acknowledge I need help so that is also another issue lah, for me, in life to find a balance is always very difficult


I believe that K lah example you say in the bus sing too loud other people don't like and all that right, but at the same time I think that, If I don't say this, my kid will think eh I can do whatever I like I don't need to care about others


I may be in this room I don't care about others I want to cry I want to shout never mind, but by me saying that it has to me it make him thinking


reasoning is very important, sometimes we cannot find the reasons like you say to your kid eh don't do this, why don't do this you don't this because like that why you say like that so nowadays the kids are more inquisitive, and I think honestly is important


don't make up, uh answers you don't know you said you know, because, eventually kids will know how to research know how know how to find, and the worst part is if let's say they know that we are lying, they will remember that, till when they grow up they will remember and


cannot trust my father cannot trust my, my wife or all, my mother, so the best is I think is to be honest, try to explain as much as possible most important is


they understand what we are trying to say why we tell them not to do certain things, maybe eventually if they said no I feel I'm doing the right, the right thing maybe I cannot say that, whatever I tell my kid is all hundred percent correct maybe my way is wrong to him is right


but when he think grow up he think about it, he's mature enough, discuss ah that's the only way discuss see what works, we cannot give them a free hand, we still have to guide, but when we guide how do we guide is it by encouraging


when do we know when we say we say, when I say this I am encouraging you or are are we saying it and they feel pressurize we don't know, so, to know your kids is not an easy task is always an everyday task


kids mood can swing today I want to be a policeman tomorrow wake up I want to be a nurse, just ask keep on talking keep on talking communication is important uh with them, always uh I always tell my wife


I don't look I try not to look for grades ah, my wife have a point when I told my wife I just want my kid to enjoy learning, as long as he enjoy learning he has this willingness to learn he will survive, my wife thinking is, if you keep on saying like that he will take it for granted I don't need to do well


I just pass that's it no need to aim for higher but what if, by pushing him a bit he become, he get higher marks, it help him in life in the future he's slightly more, competitive than rather than okay I'm okay you know


uh so, to find that balance that is where, our partner also play a part ah for me I'm the more encouraging I said never mind as long as you pass is okay, so my wife will be like aye why you do like that why not enough ah so in other word it balance


so if he feel that talk to the wife to my wife is a bit scary, can discuss with me first, uhthen I will say okay I know the reason why you don't do well and all this you watch too much TV is it you play too much game is it, balance out lah


maybe if thinking it that way is, try not to push yes can have democracy but is, guided democracy if you said totally democracy you can do whatever you want I think life will be chaos ah for most of the people


because basically I can do this oh nothing no need to have police no need to have the law so to me is, have laws, but guided that means sia guided democracy ah yes you can do what you like If I feel something is wrong I have to tell you


If I know if he said but is okay what nothing is wrong no to me is wrong when you are at this age you still must listen to me, must make the kid understand that when we say certain things do certain things, is for his good


that's what that's what we can do, at the end of the day any individuals would have to decide their own life, how they want to be


you have to enforce, enforce in certain way let


it's


okay, okay lah learn how to survive you know know the right people, can help you to to move forward at times lah


so it's it's like that lah I mean for, even I think for ourselves it's, we need to try to know, what type of, person our, our kid is a, cause some people I think we also know some people is base on


they see things, they learn faster, some people prefer to read things, and then they understand, it's better they know what to do, so as as parents, we try to to find out as much as possible what is our kid's


like, the likes and dislikes, I mean there are lot of ways to know, the person, I think some people prefer to, predict by looking at horoscopes, I mean if let's say you are a cancerian let's say you are a Leo, certain traits are like that


some people will go Fengshu see okay if you are born on this date this timing, and all that, it can be helpful in certain ways, like for me and my kid, cause my kid I mean our birthdays are very close I'm fourteen he's sixteen in the same month


so when he was born I already told my wife cause he he is premature by one month, so I told my wife, I say this kid I will know him so well but we will end up quarreling with each other, then my mum say no lah cannot be, and true enough because sometime my boy is


trying to come up with his tricks ah trying to lie or what then I like, don't bluff me lah I know actually you feel like that right then he will be like how you know, actually I told you right your birthday and me too close I know what you're thinking I know how you feel ah so, I think it plays a part because


horoscope does play a part because when I read, about my horoscope certain behaviors, is there as a guide, then of course can do further test ah like you can do your, your err personal, personality test


you know you are introvert or extrovert all these kind of test, so just, not do for the sake of, of doing, some like like last time when I went for I went for such courses is, some people go why why you come here [orh] my workplace sent me


so I just come, but for me I go I just want to know actually what's my character before that, ah they said ah get your colleagues or your superiors to to rate you all that, with the intention of finding out, so by finding out I know last time


like I say I used to follow my heart, now I follow my brain and then how did I know because my subordinate said, uh this person got no heart, he is always better in doing the right things


but on the other hand, the other person said while he is doing things, uh interested in doing the right things, but at the end of the day he's very protective of his, of his {uh) subordinates uh so I say oh okay so that means still got heart lah not so bad like got no heart


as for the superiors they say target oriented some say, I should be not so honest, be more tactful, with my colleagues, when I said, I'm honest if they make if they do mistake I'll tell them they do mistake I don't want to like


go about the way this one you can do better lah but it's totally wrong then just be honest lah so, how as an as a person what is important to you, being honest, or taking care of other people for me being honest is important, at the same time to separate it's difficult


people say work is work friend is friend but we know when we work and they if our friend it is very hard to work, right so, in order to do that, again, so for me heart and brain uh, works in tandem in certain way


in some ways I think I'm more towards the the brain uh, uh because people say when you follow the heart, you will look for for trouble lah when you follow the brain, so people say when you make decision be calm


listen to your brain more so, of course if in order for your brain to be useful you have to practice lah right practice your brain, all kind of people you meet, I mean like if work with, you know I work with old people not so old but


still set in their own ways, when you tell I tell them I don't think you should be saying, or doing this kind of thing to, the staff, then he will say I got how many work experience, handle all kind of people I know how to handle when I talk to the younger


this one lah this old man ah everything like that nagging nagging nagging nagging so, so the same thing lah so the millennial say like that then we all in the middle right !aiya! just do like that lah, it depends on the, characteristics also, so if you're going to


lead a team or see the individual, some people they need shouting, to be to do the right thing to push forward, some people you cannot shout you shout they become scared some people need, an arm over, their shoulder say eh how's everything okay your family okay so


ya lah that's the the beauty of the world lah, ya you have to be situational if you are going to, implement all one shot, across the board it will never work that's why we don't see


anybody dare say this type of governance way will work, democracy will work, meritocracy will work and all that, why I say that if let's say in the, U S they practise democracy right, so they practice democracy then they when they go and invade a country example Iraq


they invade, they said oh they're helping the country turn the country build up, you think democracy, in which part of the world that the country that the US invade, did democracy work I don't think it works, you have to be a certain level your citizen to have a certain level of knowledge and all that


in order for democracy to work, is for certain countries like those going to build up is good to be, controlled in certain way, so I think for, for Singapore and for Malaysia you see how


Singapore is very controlled but we build up, quite well, but the problem is, when do we when does, the government or whoever decide to let go, how to be more democratic, which is very difficult for Malaysia they like okay I want to do


don't want to do I want to do I don't want to do so the people down there also oh you want to do don't want to do, like example, there's a case I went to KL, there's this bus terminal quite new newly built, then after that, two years later when I went there I say eh how come the bus terminal like empty


then I ask the taxi driver I said oh the bus terminal all, last time I see still building now all ah, build up nicely how come there's no buses come in, and the taxi driver tell me oh the bus companies don't want to move, the bus companies don't want to move he said ya but the government tell them to move yes


give notice go down there they just don't want to move they want to still be at the old place, I cannot dare imagine, happening in Singapore lah I mean you I build a bus interchange, now I don't want this bus interchange I still want the old interchange of course we cannot do that so, in certain ways is good certain ways


uh so I think for us, I think for here is we trying more to, be more open, so but, sometime when you open the closet you also scared some certain secrets


hidden, agenda all that come out lah, but in the end already what do we want we just want honesty ah, if you feel something is wrong then by all mean, admit it, not saying that oh okay I will know the answers


those who don't agree with you you just find them out, just listen to me so that it's a problem, I think that also err can apply to, how we deal with our family members ah


yes yes


got ya


something goes wrong I'll be blamed


we know eh Singaporean, so I think when people you know now we talk, Singaporean or from, from other country that is one thing and sometimes it's very hard to, to tell people apart that's why now when we you see people when they are quarreling or when they scold ah go back to your country lah


that person might be born and bred in Singapore and you tell the person to go back to their country but I'm a Singaporean but people assume it that I think the only one is, safe are the Malays because the Malays from other country don't intend to migrate to Singapore for obvious reasons right


so we only can scold if Chinese say go back to your country lah born and bred Singaporean then sometimes we say, aiyah this one lah confirm like like citizen one you know we are like, suspicious of each other, ah when we are suspicious of each other we might be thinking this person because of this person all my fellow Singaporeans


are suffering but when we say fellow Singaporeans, we know some are naturalised, some are second generation so it's very hard to, to justify what we say ah so, the best is, this suspicions


unhappiness cannot creating anger so when creating anger (ppb) people sometimes people say I better don't talk, If I talk, I will say the wrong thing so I don't talk so keep on all become selfish look after themselves, and all that so to tell people do not look at colours


we see other countries black and white they are so simple black and white, but yet after so many years they still got problem with black and white, some more work ah so some of us all many colors sometimes look the same but is totally different is can say Filipinos look the same like Malays


we can say Chinese look the same like Vietnamese and all that, ah so at the end of the day to get with to understand the concept of, no matter what we are all human beings we are just different colors it is always very difficult and it's human nature, we tend to go with those that is


similar to us, and of course, so in how to bring that it all comes down to the, the individual responsibility ah so let's say, you know you are an introvert and introvert sometimes see people I want to say but I just cannot say


how do you improve that, find a way to improve improve the way to become an extrovert for example, some in some introvert uh can you attend the party with me, he doesn't enjoy party but he go but when he go he is suffering, compared to an extrovert extrovert will be the life of the party introvert will be down there like eh who am I going to talk to who am I going to meet to keep on looking at the time I'm going to


I want to go back already but he's there so but at least, put in the effort how he want to improve cause for me, personally I'm an introvert, then after that I try to be extrovert, so I did the, personality test I think when I was secondary school when I did that


I found out that I'm an introvert, then when I was in, in working place, when I work already I do, then end up my introvert and extrovert, become an X, so I say eh how come become an X, so I check then the thing is


I can become both, there are certain times like suddenly, even my wife said, say I it can it's very hard to predict you sometimes you can be so introvert you go to a, gathering and all that I'll be like sitting down there keep quiet


sometime people are happily talking I'll be like, okay I eat all the food already can he still time to go back already I'm like that certain times I'll be going down there, I never talk to the person before I talk like I know the person, told my wife say, how come you become like that, then I say practice ah


so now I follow my mood ah so If I go to a gathering if I'm happy good luck lah I know everyone If I not happy okay I know all the food, so it all comes down to, the person you willing to open up, two options when people like don't want to open I always tell the person I say nobody life is perfect


I got a friend this group of friend I say my secondary mate it's like, so we are still keeping in touch we use to play football together everything together, so there is uh five close of us, but one, he's not as, uh the same status


as us ah but this friend he's always complaining, my life is like that my life is like this my life is like that, so every time I said to him if you want, to improve compare yourself to others, see what they're doing right


study it, adapt to you according to your own style, so he said okay, so after that he start comparing, but when he start comparing he is still not doing anything, I see like ah I said like this one, it's Francis


!wah! he can have maid ah all that of course lah that's why easy to take care of the kid and all that, lets say if complain he got maid but did you realise how come he can have a maid, husband and wife is working, someone to control the maid because the parent of the


husband is staying with, with them so can can control the maid how to take care of the kids, you are staying with your wife only then and your wife is not working, of course your income will be lesser you cannot afford a maid lah, right if you want that sort of status I say are you willing to work like


Francis, right then you no don't want the you cannot be and I want the whole cake, like you cannot have the whole cake and take everything, so life you have to share you have to see if you feel that your status in life is like that you are not happy with it, lose something to bring the cane like what you said


my this friend, he is err, his history is the parents doesn't have a proper house, have to sleep at the beach and all that then I said you look at that, not to look down but look at that say I don't want to be like that, truth he must wait the kid you cannot say [orh] this is the trend


then if you say it's a trend how come people said, eh know when got babies ah, the baby is, fresh, no sin, everything start from zerp, but how the baby will, will improve in life it's all down to the parent


are you willing to make the change if you see that eh I'm last time like this this is wrong, and encourage is your kid then you help to break the chain if you cannot do it yourself, you help your kid to break the chain lah I think no parents will want, their kid to suffer


for me personally I want, I tell my wife I said K right now I'm like this, I don't want my kid to be like this he should do better than me, If I have a diploma he must at least have a degree, not because of pushing I say I want him to be better than me


so that is, then again it's individuals lah, life and choices lah, like you say, by being a freelancer example


if lets say, show the kid, like that the kid might have this thinking that oh, uh living life, uh working from home is the only way, that could also be, interpret


so it's always to my point is always try to, tell the kids, these are the options, you can work from home can work, as an employee some kid maybe, uh I cannot work from home I prefer to be employee okay go ahead, chase your dream chase your life


but you must understand at the end of the day, don't blame anyone else for your life, don't come and I do not want my kid to come and say, oh I become like this because my father like that, so that is the main point I say it's your life, my job is to guide you I give you whatever but you have to decide your own life


like example you I sometime people said, uh of course I'm not rich lah because my father not rich what, cannot be like that what right you are responsible for your own life, I give the best that I have, is up to you how you make it, so that is the


to go as a


drift it away


means like not doing any investment part of the money, or buy property


for me, ten million, I'll do some investment, with it then, do whatever, any


I will do I will buy property (ppb), with that huge of amount of money I also don't know what to do actually (ppb)


so it's better to buy property at least you can see it, you can see, how the money is being invested to, I will go to investment


so that's the money it roll


or maybe you buy property from, neighbouring countries, buy property then you rent out, maybe for example Malaysia there


you can buy then you rent out


then you buy at your own country, you also rent out to people, that's how you get back the money back, no lah means you buy one or two property


some of the then some of the money you invest, invest to i don't know what kind of investment there is, part of it you can, ya spend on yourself or whoever you want to spend to ah


so that, that, that seven million at least won't be finished, just like that means, part of it, ya when you spend on yourself is already finished


you cannot see already the thing, but at least you have this kind of investment property you can see it, ya


I already spend, I already, say so part of it you spend on yourself or someone else, ya the my first motive is


buy one or two property then part of it investment then some of it, you spend on yourself or whoever you want to spend to, of course a lot of friend will come


but it's also depends also, on how you, if you won this money if you never tell anyone nobody know


just you yourself or your family, K thanks ah, on what kind of, this uh


winning money, from where it come from, I also don't know maybe Toto ah


no I think they will publicity, they will publicity, they will, so


they won't publicity they only will say which, outlet only win, but they won't say your name, they also have to play safe of your means


ya just keep it to your close family lah


okay if you could wake up tomorrow morning with a special ability, what would you have


for me is the special ability, I think, I want to be a invisible ah, so I can go anywhere free dish


no I mean I want to go to places places places nobody know me, there's a restriction, if invisible there's no restriction for me


actually never say any family


but invisible doesn't say that is a, permanent invisible


who or what irritates you


people i deal with ah, as my previous job, clients, they cause they don't know what we are facing off that's where I become


feel like very irritating (ppb), it's like that, nothing much, just the clients only, of the things that they demands from us


and they don't understand


describe, okay is when I, the happiest moment is when, I myself, means my wife my first kid my first child


was born, is where I help, to receive him, it was the happiest moment


is uh, that's the happiest moment when I receive means the when I receive the holding the head come out, that's the happiest moment, ah yes


uh no hospital, uh the doctor the doctor give me, means to help


mean I request ah means I request from the doctor that I want to, to hold my my son head that time, so he give the permission


so what about you


the forceps, suction


oh like alien like, that's what my friend told me also


how long the process


or more or less same same as me also, the first the first born


for me, when my wife the water bag burst, when the water bag burst, I gone like crazy like that


mean it was my first born so actually we don't know what to do also, ya the water bag burst at home


test mic test mic


okay uh, K let's start with this uh, designer fashion


okay, and then there's a woman standing looking at the, mannequin ah


I guess she want to buy it, but in circumstances ah, she's like, no money to buy


okay, K now let's move on to this uh


oh mine only have female only, okay now me move on to this uh health shop, K I saw this uh I think is a mum


pulling his child


K I think the kid, the he's, he's bringing his Teddy Bear, but his Teddy Bear is, fall, so I guess


think the mum is very like in a angry mood


is a natural energy pills


there's a dove at the health shop also, okay guess you know I think ah okay there's one lady, standing in front


there's a car blue car with, unattended with a open door


but mine here is all bags are on


ya she's a I think she is a rich lady ah, by the way she dress, she wore the thing, necklace


but, how come this blue car the door is left open ah, or maybe this lady is waiting for the driver to come


okay


the book out there is the is written, it, it tips from Bill-Gates, okay next to it that's a three white, I think it's a book, symbol of book


okay, think there's nothing much here


three in one, ya bumpers are black , lights are yellow and red


the Thursday light the Thursday late night shop is it, oh okay, I think there the brick there's a


written, paper written on it that says Thursday late night shop, mine is Thursday (ppb)


there's a green planters only, I can see, okay we move on to the next, the news


ah the news the kiosk there, okay there's a signage uh saying sell celebrity gossip


the kiosk the top shelter there there's a one yellow colour bird, and there's and there's a man manning the shop, the kiosk, and the kiosk


shop name is Muse, K the man is wearing a green cap, orange tops, and wearing a spectacles


okay next to him left and right there's a, I think it's a newspaper, okay on the left side, on the right side of him there's a one newspaper


hanging and on the left side there's a two, newspaper white and blue colour


okay, okay sure, okay the kiosk is in a grey grey in colour the kiosk


grey in colour and the background is in a blue colour, okay


is a food, the girl is wearing pink top, red bottoms


green shoes, with the, hair tied, yellow colour hair tie, ya the dog is in orange colour


and the dog is sniffing some pie I think, next to the dog there's a signage pole, with, four indicator


but nothing say that, nothing say, just blank only, there's a four, okay


below the couple there's a, sentence, say that shine in the Dance Contest


okay the casino, there's one, at the all bags are on the, think the banner ah


okay, there's a blue colour car, with one door open


K, K health shop


okay, and the health shop, there's a saying there selling natural Energy Pills


K in front of the shop there's a mum child and a Teddy Bear, okay the designer fashion shop, K there's a three shoe


three pair of shoe


K that's it I think we have twelve already, eight nine ten eleven twelve


okay I'm the only son no siblings, I'm close to my mum


beside my mum, there's my relative, okay now uh


crash and burn, describe the worst date, you have ever been on, like, accident or crash and burn, is there any


oh okay uh, is actually Marvel, dc Marvel, the Superman , him


because, when since I young, when I watch Superman, he's like a hero to me, so, he save a lot of the people


that's what I, very amazed with him


okay uh it's a mini-me, how important is having children to you


for me having children is ya to carry on my legacy, and furthermore, having and without a children in a home is totally like


you're missing something, for me now I have a kids, for them to left, leave the house, and I'm there only with my wife we like missing something


we miss their voice means although they quarrel here and there but we still miss them


okay I think, this happen during my school days time, school they have time


for me there's one ah during my secondary time, but that was think seven years relationship, so we parted also because of, she migrated so we lost contact from (ppb)


is there someone at this table you like to know better, what intrigues or interest you about this person


think there's nothing much talk about this


for me, I'm just a simple person only, I just go I am a simple person means like, I go with the flow


okay uh I'm, oh this colour my hair because of, I feel like I want to colour only, is not about following trend because I feel like I want to colour


I'm a, boat driver actually, i drive ya I'm a captain of a boat, is been already twelve years


no no no this is not my first job this is, before I move on to, sea job offshore, last time I own used to work at land also, so I, get fed up with the land job already


so I move on to offshore, land job normally mine is a technical job, uh i do mainly on electrician, electrical


okay, I'm (ppb), cause I work a lot of company (ppb), uh there's no like, like a permanent for me, but for the actually job also


this is my the second company that I work, the first company is because that, they can't pay what I asking for also that's why I move, I resign from there


oh because I want to, I already like, fed up already with the land job (ppb)


the people, because, in my technical line I need to


communicate with a lot of, people then there's a lot of character , that's where lah I feel like , I cannot this do do this kind of, like I'm providing them a service you know


okay, we troubleshoot for them but, the customer then my colleagues also, and, sometime they don't know


mostly about the customer they don't know about this electrical thing so, once they call us, they, they die die must, feel like


when we come down this thing must really works, yes this thing can really works if there is a parts, to replace it, but sometime we don't have the part we need to order but they don't understand it


we already explain explain explain, but sometime they also you know, grumble here grumble there, I feel


feel a bit challenging also (ppb), like I mean like in challenging in like explaining to them to understand, of the situation, I work in that technical line is about


six years, then after that, I feel like, I cannot cannot already, that's why I move to offshore, when the first time I move to offshore yes, it's a bit tough for me


because I need to start from scratch, I need to start from the low level, until now I, means now I am manning uh my own boat


ah yes, there's a big pay cut actually, me I just follow only with the flow


terms of because when I starting this this job I only taking back an allowance only, and the allowance is, very, insufficient for me to survive for a month, so so my


no I never take any second job so my what i do is, once a week only I came I come back home, from offshore, so that's where I


cut my expenses, ah ya when you are offshore of course they provide everything


no I means like once a week then I cause I want to cut down on my transport money, to save up


so, that time already I married already, so my family quite understand, they know, I just told them just suffer this sixteen month only


after that we are, okay, so okay, so right now we're quite okay lah i don't say we very high but quite okay


okay progression means like I what I say I start from scratch from below, then all the way up then now I'm manning a, I can drive a boat, a ship, that is below than twenty five time


I can drive this you know the ferry going to Batam, okay I can drive that also


the cruise ship the cruise ship I'm not up to that yet, there's still a long way to go, but I think, here only I already stop already, i don't want to pursue much already


ya and the cruise ship you need a, means, an upgrade, of your license, it's like, like a, car, you need a class C you need to get class four class five


so cruise ship cruise ship we label it like a class five we are driving a trailer like that, because, i don't want to


when I have the license the this like cruise cruise ship license right then like, my purpose already, have to go for, foreign vessel already


so foreign vessels mean like I have to leave my family for how many months already so that is what i don't want to happen, uh so far I never go for, means out of Singapore


I never been to out of Singapore, mine is only the port limit


ah yes, I won't also, I will miss my kids


and driving a boat is not like driving a car , the the danger there you don't know, when actually


so, when you, out of, Singapore water there's a lot of danger that, ya lah I have watch, and I hear what people say, even in Singapore water also there's a danger but


we know how to escape from that danger


the danger in the water, actually we don't know also what is the danger inside there


sometime they cannot detect, sometime we have to use our own, intuition ah


ya ya we already been train all these, because accident we can't we cannot say


it can happen anytime also, even how safety you are if accident want to happen it will happen


no I think I will work here until, ya until I retired, this is where I choose


okay now I've question for you, how important is marriage to you


for me marriage is, something for me to settle down, from my single single life, so when I come to marriage state, that is where my


my full responsibility is there, K and, it teach me how to, means like marriage teach me a lot of thing actually


means like, means like, how hard, our life is, mean, how to cope it


life is not actually hard is just that, no no no no I mean, not about life hard means like, the things that we need to go through, K because


we have to face a lot of thing, okay, so, life is, okay, is not about life, is about the


the changes around us only that's where we have to cope it, means, ya sometime like, you know last time, back to my work that I <unk> the sixteen month there, during my very very the low tide so we have to cope with a lot of bills


so, that's where, it teach me ah to how to not to over, overspend my expenditure, my so my


family means my my spouse, that is where she get involved also, so we have to cut a lot of thing, ah yes


cause compare during compare my single life and marriage


I think marriage have, have helped me a lot of thing, mean from ya during my single life I was very bad , I'm not a good person actually


I I do a lot of thing, I'm like ya i do a lot of thing during my younger days, for example I like to fight find trouble


make my parents worry me, so, when I my ns is over that is where I, told myself that I need to settle down I cannot, play this kind of thing anymore already so that is why marriage


is inside me, just for because of friends ah sometimes


no no I mean, something ah I think we don't talk about this, sure that was a very long time already


fight for friends, ah yes, yes, i don't know fight for my friends


ya sometimes they ask help also, so we are there lah to help them


and during my single days ah I was very havoc, I'm very havoc means like I like to go clubbing, I go clubbing, drink here drink there get drunk until my mum also don't know what to say already


I think is depend on individual character behaviour


cause the, I cannot blame my friends for what I am also on that time is myself


when I fight still I'm bad person, like I said we fight for friends, and they ask us for help they


can't do much then that is where we, render our, this one ah, when


ya when, when I come to think when I fight with a person ya is, if it's actually a bad thing , help is not bad


but when you fight with that person, you fight with the other person that's what make you bad, because, ya, I help your friend I help my friend, but, when I beat up someone


actually, you're helping, but actually, actually things can talk out actually, but, because of, last time during my youngster , my younger days we we don't go for talking actually


for for talking it's like a waste of time we just give them only, we just whack them, cause


last time during our my younger days means like, when we do the talking it means like we're like wasting our time it's like, my my my this kind my this friend already ask for help means he already in trouble


so, when we heading to that, person, so our target is there our mission is there we want to whack him not talking , cause if talking ah, it doesn't, defeat any purpose


means that guy will do again to my friend again, it's to give a lesson actually


ya deliver message ah mean not to disturb, my friend again, yes we solve


during that time I feel good, but when I come to think, after the, when I come when when I'm in my, matured matured, in my matured stage ah


I actually think back of the nonsense thing that I have done before, it's like, why ah like that I also don't, I also don't know actually , it shouldn't be like that actually


for now, we just go for a talk only, just give advice only, for my turn I like to give advice


so cause last time I really learn from bad, so from bad now I become good so I can differentiate


yes, I'm good so I can give advice of what to, of what for them ah actually give advice for them, rather than you go for a fight is better that, thing can talk


yes, of life


ya I'm from a bad person


five years old, five years old I already bad because my friend is not my


during that time during my Children's Day, my mean my kids day ah my teenage day, all my friend is not my my same age no no normally is all adults, uh that is where


I learn a lot of thing from them, all these of my friend ah is not a very good person actually, so, they take care of me because I'm the youngest


so they take care of me so from there I learn from them a lot of thing, what I learn from there i don't want to share, growing to be a bad person mean in a study study stage


not five years ah five year since I was in, Kindergarten Kindergarten six years old, (ppb) ah six years old


uh I'm still under my mum, control, when I step to school that is where I have the freedom


no no not five six, uh five, I'm quite okay actually, uh because I never left house I never go out, I'm still at home


uh no, just like a normal child, normal child at home watching tv


eat sleep (ppb), that's what a five years old kid do , I can't say is bad or good


four years old, four years old I can't remember already, I I I know I'm at home ah


raise by my parents ah


no is me myself, no nobody influence or teach me how to be bad is me myself, I just, because


ah I'm still a, kid I mean a child you know which don't know anything , ya I'm feel like, ya, a neutral neutral neutral child mean like fresh child


yes, ya start from a good


then I become bad


can say that, cause, i don't want to talk about the, cause, during my six years and below i don't want to talk about that (ppb)


what is, I talking about bad is when I step out of the house, means means like I I explore thing, I explore


means like that is where i do exploration, till my, ns time, eighteen, eighteen


eighteen years old, ya I learn a lot of things, that's twelve years (ppb), now I forty


ya, since birth


ya only that particular part only


ya correct


if follow that I'm not a bad person ah, if follow that formula I'm not a bad person


only that period of time only ya only that period of time


I'm a good person , because I learn the bad things a lot ah


that is where I took I I'm a bad person, only that particular period I'm a bad person only, ya but now it's over already (ppb) so I'm still a good person


of course I believe I'm a good person, I'm a


I need to lead a good example to my kid also, so, so whatever, they also can cheat me also, all my kid cannot cheat me because


whatever they want to cheat, I know already all inside my pocket , I learn bad thing earlier than them, so they can't cheat me or tell me I lie also


of course ah (ppb), become bad or become good to them


actually it's up to them but I try my best not to let them become bad, whatever bad experience I already encounter, I'll tell them what is the right thing and what is the wrong thing to do


how they choose their life, i don't want to get involved, it's their life they choose to be like that but as a parent, I've, must do my part to tell them


nowadays


ya I made my choices, I'm the one who lead my life, nobody, we we can only tell the only, whatever we know we tell them ah


mic test mic test


of all the good thing that I've done, like some I want to be remembered, ya all the good thing the bad thing i don't want to say already just don't remember


okay uh where is your true home


why you say


do you have home overseas


I'll do, the things that I never done before, means like, help people round


helping those who really really needs, If I can give all my assets to them is much better


ya to though ya to those who really need it


this one is uh like as an individual, as an individual, not in family matters, ya as an individual, if let's say, if


in charity means, I want to do more charity, charity, do more charity


means, whatever I already take back now I want to give back, because I know that I have already got one more years to, so


all these thing will never bring me, to my grave also so is better for me to, give back, mean I already keep aside to my family, and some of it


some I will do charity, cause, no


no there's a, many


for, for your last meal, what would you eat and who would you eat with, means like for your last supper right


is there any like your favourite dish, or your mum's cooking, your really really favourite dish


even your wife can't cook it


okay what motto do you live by


K for me my motto is, never ever give up (ppb), cause there's nothing that is impossible


and I teach all my kids about this also don't ever give up on something there's always a way


the most important, respect everyone, be it, uh someone, younger or older


respect them, that's what my, yes respect them


I mean that's how what my parents told me since I was young respect, even though there's a bad thing that I already done but still, live utmost with the respect


ya I still carry the their words still now


okay uh name one of your closest friend, how he or she is special to you, K for me last time I used to have a closest friend but after my my this so called close friend play me out


i don't have any close friend anymore i don't believe in friends, close friends i don't believe in close friend anymore, because he, !wah! he played me out


this so called I say close friend is really really like a, true close friend to me, is really like my, true blood (ppb)


means whatever, last time we used to do all kinds of thing together, (ppb) be good bad we do all things together, so


so now, no more already, because, there's one, period of time


we open up a, business, so he is the one who open up the business first, then, about almost a year no no it's not a joint venture he open up his idea