Six weeks have gone by since the tragic helicopter crash that claimed the lives of men and women in uniform. The Bell 212 helicopter crash deep in the jungle of Kuala Belait that claimed 12 lives plunged the nation in sadness as Bruneians had never experienced a tragedy of that scale for a long time. Many across the nation wept as the news tugged at their heart strings.
The feeling of losing a loved one is something that one cannot explain. The void left behind can never be filled and recovering from this trauma is a journey that can't be done alone.
The fog of this tragedy is slowly lifting and a semblance of normalcy returning and those who were physically and emotionally attached with the fallen heroes and heroines will continue to live on carrying with them cherished memories.
Below is a moving tribute paid by six brave women who, after the passing of their husbands, have found comfort in their strong albeit small circle as they look to Allah the Almighty for guidance. Their determination to face the world despite the tragedy is touching and commendable.
Six men on board the Bell 212 were husbands and fathers. Wives and children waited for them to come home on the afternoon of July 20, 2012 but instead had to learn and accept that they were never coming home. It all felt very real when we had to identify our husbands' bodies, tell our toddlers and kids that their fathers have returned to our creator, Allah the Almighty. They were sons of good parents, the nation's heroes, ones who have risked their lives to protect our country.
Until today, all six of us cannot find the right words that will tell you what it feels like to be in our shoes. Describing it is easy and it will make sense to everyone - that the ones who bear the world on their shoulders are expected to feel devastated and hurt. But after the tragedy, life goes on - friends and family have their lives to tend to. But ours have changed completely. We have lost the love of our lives, the fathers of our children, the leader of our family and the ones to wipe our tears away. We will never fall asleep and rise the same ever again.
They were great men. They worked very hard, and they died in the line of duty. These fathers were all strong, hard workers and strong-willed. As mothers, of course we had wished for our children to grow up knowing their fathers like how we had pictured it. We had wished that their fathers would be there to teach them about religion, life and other important things. We had wished that their fathers would be there to watch them grow and turn into wonderful adults and, as wives, to have them as our life partners until the end. Allah the Almighty loves them more and because we love our late husbands with every beat of our hearts, we have accepted their passing and returning to the Creator.
Allah the Almighty chose us six mothers to experience this most difficult period in our lives. And we take this opportunity to brace ourselves and pray for guidance and strength from the Creator. This hardship has tested and is testing us to our very core but hardships are also a blessing and a sign of Allah the Almighty's love. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Whenever Allah wills good for a person, He subjects him to adversity". We have received our wake up call, we have cried humbly prostrating to Allah, we have felt the greatest pain in our hearts and our bodies have trembled as this tragedy serves as a reminder as to how small we are and how great Allah the Almighty is.
We have spent weeks together as widows and talking to each other every day. We find comfort knowing that we are not alone. We have also shared our stories of the most beautiful things and memories that we have gone through with our husbands. Our husbands had many great things in common and we have come to realise that all good men return to Allah the Almighty at their best. They were the kind of husbands that treated us right, showered us with love and care and absolutely adored their children.
The one thing that has given us much comfort in our hearts, most importantly, is knowing that not only did they die as Mujahiddiens - those who have passed for the name of Allah the Almighty - they were the kind of Muslim husbands, fathers and men who performed their duties to Allah the Almighty without hesitation and with the purest of hearts. With that, we are thankful to Allah as they did not leave us with the burden of worrying, Insyallah.
Forty days have passed. With patience and the beautiful gift of our children from Allah the Almighty, we have made major life changes. The loss of our husbands have thrown us so far out of our comfort zones that we have created new ones. Within these few weeks, there have been good and bad days with the hardest moments being those when we wish our husbands were around to help us raise our children. The learning process of being a single parent is not easy but we are slowly adapting. The best moments are definitely the times when we are close to Allah and when we have our children, to look them in the eyes and see a part of our husbands looking back at us.
Our marriages were short but they were sweet. When we shed tears, we let them fall and believe that each drop is a memory. We all loved the life we had but after this tragedy we have a stronger relationship with Allah the Almighty. We look at this world in a different way and more than anything, we look forward to the hereafter.
We will forever miss them - we miss them now and we will miss them in the future. We will have good days and bad days but we will pull through with Allah the Almighty's guidance. The sadness will eventually pass and our children will eventually understand. Please do not take us as weak. We carry the world on our shoulders only because we are strong women. Insyallah.
770 Captain (D) Md Ismael bin Dato Setia Hj Md Samid, 31, was a Wing Commander at the Officer Cadet School. He was a father to 19-month-old Mudzaffar Ilyas and a loving husband to Liyana Imani binti Abdul Latif, who is currently five months pregnant with their second child. Captain Md Ismael was a golfer, triathlete, actively participated in local events as well as international triathlon events such as the Ironman. He maintained a healthy lifestyle with multiple personal best times in running, cycling and swimming. He was the eldest of five siblings and a wonderful son to Dato Setia Hj Md Samid as well as Datin Hjh Rafeah. He graduated with Honours from University of Surrey and attended military courses in Bangladesh, Singapore, Vietnam, Taiwan and Malaysia. He had a loving set of family and friends and often said his son was his pride and joy, his wife his rock and his parents his backbone.
18223 Lance Corporal (U) Muhammad Khairuddin bin Hj Abbas, 25, joined the Royal Brunei Armed Forces under intake 132 in 2006 where he was appointed as a clerk and was posted as a crewman in 2008. He was the youngest son to Cikgu Hj Abbas bin Hj Abd Rahman and Cikgu Hjh Aishah bin Hj Abd Rahman. He was a great father to one-year-old Muhammad Ammar Rayyan and married to Hajah Siti Norain binti Haji Ramli who is currently 22 weeks pregnant with their second child. He participated in the Brunei International Skill at Arms (BISAM) representing the Royal Brunei Air Force. He actively participated in futsal tournaments and achieved best player status and was declared high scorer for his team. Though he was occupied with his duties, he always made spare time for his family and friends.
17808 Kpl Mohd Mahdenie bin Nurudin, 29, was a father to Mohd Aqeel Ezani, two years and 10 months and Nuraqeesha Azzahra, one year and 10 months, and married to Hadizah. The late 17808 Kpl Mohd Mahdenie bin Nurudin was a loving and pious husband and father, one who protected, loved and cared for his family. As the eldest in the family, he transformed into a responsible husband, father and brother and was very close with his siblings. His jokes and laughter will be missed by his family and colleagues at work but Allah the Almighty loves him more. May Allah the Almighty rest his soul in peace and place him among the righteous. Amin Amin Ya Rabbal 'alamin.
"For a wife, the most valuable thing in life is a pious husband. It is through whom a wife and children can gain happiness in this world and the hereafter. His demise on July 20, 2012 was deeply felt by his entire family, especially his wife and children."
765 Lieutenant (U) Pg Hj Arif Iskandar bin Pg Hj Shahbuddin, 29, was a Bell 212 pilot with the Royal Brunei Air Force. He was a father to one-year-and-eight-month-old daughter Alya Farzana and was happily married to Rezona Tajudin. Lt (U) Arif joined the RBAirF as a cadet officer in 2005 intake 127. He was very keen on becoming a helicopter pilot from the very beginning of his career in the Royal Brunei Armed Forces. He went to Melbourne, Australia for his cadet training and upon completing that, he started his flying lessons and loved every moment of it. He was very proud when he completed his first solo flying - he was ready, he was a pilot. Friends congratulated him, family members were proud of him.
It was one of his happiest moments in his life. Lt (U) Arif was always seen over the weekend with his wife and child and they always looked happy and content. He was always known as a family man, both at the office and at home. He constantly had a smile on his face, for everyone, everywhere, at any time. And that is how he will always be remembered.
210 Lt Md Khairol Mahdi bin Hj Sahri, 29, was a father to two-year-old Nur Hibah Yusrina and four-month-old Md Khairun Na'eem and a dedicated husband to Rabiatul Adawiyah binti Haji Md Yunos. He had several milestone achievements and had worked his way up, taking every opportunity to better himself as a military man. He was a student at Ma'ahad Islam Brunei and went on to graduate from Universiti Brunei Darussalam. He was employed under several institutions prior to joining the Royal Brunei Armed Forces and was once attached with Shell as well as Sugar Bun and was a professional photographer. He became a recruit at the Exercise Institution in Penanjong in 2007 and continued to flourish after having travelled to Pakistan to undergo the 33rd Graduate Course, PMA in 2008/2009 and became the Platoon Head for Company C at the Third Battalion in Lumut after he returned.
A responsible man, he was opinionated and independent, respectful and full of life who would never fail to bring cheer with his mere presence. He had always fulfilled his responsibilities as a husband and father to his children and was always willing when it came to his professional and familial duties.
"Every prayer and verse from al-Quran that we read is dedicated to you my dearest husband and father to my children, Lt Md Khairol Mahdi bin Hj Sahri. I will always miss you till the end of time."
13203 SSjn Md Amin bin Awg Mahmud, 34, father to six children namely Md Syafi Wafiudin, 15, Nurul Afifah Haziqah,14, Md Afif Rafiudin, 13, Nurul Syafiqah Haziyah,11, Nurul Syahirah Hanisah, four, and Nur Zara Insyirah, two months old. He was happily married to Dyg Nadisah. Ssjn Md Amin had been in service for 14 years as a crew man. He was a responsible father who would always put his family first. A loving man who brought laughter home all the time, he was a husband, father, partner and always had a smile on his face. He was always ready to carry out his responsibilities in all aspects of his life and would always put his wife and children first. He will always be a husband and father to us in this life and hereafter.--Courtesy of Borneo Bulletin