"Don't you even think about agreeing with that last point. That's my wife we're talking about. Oh, I'm sure you know ... but in case you missed the good news ... Hermione and I got married recently. It was a beautiful ceremony, you'd have loved it I'm sure. We would have invited you, but we couldn't decide if you should be sat on the Bride or Groom's side. And by that, I mean we couldn't agree on which one of us you'd fucked over and stabbed in the back the most. I insisted it was her, she was sure that it was me, and ... you know what marriages are like ... we just couldn't come to a decision. 