I still need what’s behind his eyes, even if it’s just more humiliation. I need it even if it’s a setup. If it isn’t, though, it could be worth it. I know it isn’t worth it, but I need it. Why do I need to feel special? I am already special. I’m smart. I have the best of friends. We’ve done some brilliant things together. I’m the best student in our year. I am the best student in the school.