In the end, it isn't dying that scares me but pain. If I don't wake up in the morning I will know nothing of it. My affairs are in order, my husband and children are as provided for as they are ever going to be. I have an army of friends committed to raising them like besotted aunts and uncles. I grieved for the loss of life I should have had with them months ago, I cried until my eyes ran dry and my chest heaved violently. I'm not over it. I never will be. I wanted to see my daughter grow to be a woman and my son to be a man as good as his father. But that isn't my lot and I have accepted that the Universe has called me home before I was ready to come. I have stopped asking "Why me?" I have stopped raging at any god that could exist. Severus and the medi-wizard worked as fast as they could, I know. It just wasn't fast enough for me. So now just let me kiss the beloved people who have graced my life and die.