Why would I want to say such a thing? I've never wanted to say those words to anyone before. What is it that upsets me so much that I want to say them to Granger of all people? The absence of my Occlumency? My reactivated conscience? A oppressed part of my battered soul that is gradually reconnecting with my consciousness? Whatever it is, it's strong. The short sentence works its way relentlessly through my heaving chest, up my dry throat and straight onto my tongue, which I have to press hard against the roof of my mouth to keep the words from leaving my lips. And there's more.