He lies back, beside her, and he passes the time deliberately remembering everything awful that he has ever done to her, from when they first met up to this moment right now, and he weighs it against everything good he has ever done for her, and he comes up woefully short on the side of good. And he is sorry – sorrier than he can ever express to her, and he says it over and over to her as she sleeps. He remembers hating a small, bossy, buck-toothed mudblood, and he remembers how cruel he had been to her for so many years, and funnily enough, he wishes that he had been crueller, because then things might be different. Then she might have kept hating him when he'd come to the Order, instead of giving him another chance. And then they wouldn't be here, together.