. Remus closes his eyes. He’s only ever seen their graves once, over a month after their deaths, having missed the funeral but unable to stay away. It seemed like it couldn’t be real until he’d seen those headstones, still filled with so many flowers you could barely see their names. Seeing them made it real, and true, and that’s when Remus had gone numb. He stayed numb that whole year, sometimes with the aid of drugs or drinks or sex, and when Halloween came around Remus thought about visiting again but couldn’t, could only let all the hurt and pain and fury wash over him until he was unconscious. 