"There are too many moving pieces so I’ll just give you all of them and maybe you can help me understand how to feel. Look, I don’t fucking deserve her and don’t try to convince me otherwise. I’ve been occluding for so long and I’ve buried literally everything that I thought could harm me... or her, during the war. I’ve occluded so much that Severus informed me I will go mad if I don’t break down my walls. I’ve been going every Sunday to McGonagall’s office so he can help me bit by bit."