She spends some time after Hogwarts doing nothing. It’s a blur. Her blackouts meshing with her inactivity in an episode of mindlessness. It terrifies her. It terrifies her almost as much as the fact she almost never hears from her friends and how little she writes them. It terrifies her the same way she feels disconnected. She should have joined the ministry, she should still feel that desire. It’s simply gone, like her memories. That comparison is what drives her to do something. She needs to do something before that blankness overtakes her life and leaves her an unfeeling shell of who she used to be.