He'd just wanted some time alone to clear the nightmare visions from his mind, to blow away the clinging threads of pain, and betrayal, and his father mocking him with hard, cruel eyes as he cut away Draco's hand. To try to push the memories of the weeks of torture he'd experienced after that firmly back into the recesses of his mind again, so he could forget. Blank out the horrors that, unlike his missing hand, didn't have permanent physical reminders that they'd taken place. That made them easier to repress. To blot out.