Lee Jordan, as usual, had got hold of the microphone. He'd been doing this since the first game of his first year, and Percy genuinely had no idea how that had happened. "Alright everybody, it's our first game of the year, Gryffindor versus Slytherin!" he yelled, clearly unaware that the point of microphones is to prevent you from having to yell. "We've all been wondering who Oliver Wood would get for a Seeker this year, and today he's fielding Gryffindor prefect Percy Weasley! After a few years of trying to replace Charlie Weasley, it looks like he's banking on genetics!"