All the way to my sleeping quarters, my rage doesn't subside. I can't shake it either by having a wank in the shower, desperately focusing on some distant memory of a blowjob from a nameless Death Eater. (Whether I didn't ask her name at the time or simply can't remember I'm not even trying to fathom.) When I collapse on my bed afterwards, the rage is still there, hovering over me like a dark cloud.