tug of war
Mama praying for me, grandma praying for me
Satan preying on me, Jesus waiting on me
Cause I been straddling the fence, it’s time to make decisions
I been thinking ‘bout heaven lately, don’t think I’ll get in
Cause I been going back and forth I love the way I’m living
But I hate it at the same time cause I know I’m sinning
And I don’t wanna be like them hypocritical Christians
So I stay away from Jesus completely ‘til I’m ready to give Him
Everything, but that seems like it’ll never happen
My girl coming over later, you know what’s about to happen
Then after smashing I’m sitting there asking
If eternity in Hell is worth some moments of your satisfaction
Man I’m so back and forth
Back and forth like a tug of war (yeah)
Cause I’ve been fighting for my life like
Tryna get my life right
And I really want more
I don’t know, back and forth like a tug of war
And I been fighting for control and fighting for my soul and
This is war, it’s a tug of war
I got two choices, both require pain
One’s the pain of change and the pain of staying the same
One of ‘em leads to joy, other one leads to shame
One of ‘em leads to freedom, the other keeps me in chains
I wear a cross and give You thanks for my blessings, ain’t that enough?
Why you want everything? Can’t you leave this part of my life untouched?
I thought following You meant I only had to say yes once
Now everyday I wake up You give me some cross to take up
You really want me to break up with my girl? Nah that’s too much
I know what’s best for me, You don’t understand my complexities
See, I gotta make a living so don’t ask where my checks come from
I hear You talking, I ain't gone numb
I know I’m in the dark and I gotta find my way to the Son
Cause You’re calling on my name and I know I can’t run
But I feel so back and forth
Back and forth like a tug of war (yeah)
Cause I’ve been fighting for my life like
Tryna get my life right
And I really want more
I don’t know, back and forth like a tug of war
And I been fighting for control and fighting for my soul and
This is war, it’s a tug of war
A trail of broken hearts, a man full of regrets
The thrill has left, the empty promises of sin sets
You wanna put treasure inside my hands but You cease
Cause they’re clamped, holding on to sins I won’t release
I don’t know how to start loving You and stop doing what I’m doing
If I gain You tell me what I’m really losing
You have to change me in my sin, I never choose Him
My heart needs to see something greater than what I’m pursuing so
Is it true that You give rest to the weary?
Can you accept and repair me, do you hear me?
It’s so clearer now, it’s painfully apparent that I can’t have my sin and my Savior, they’re not for sharing
Anything that I lose to follow you is not a loss
My girlfriend, my friends, my money, even my job
But sometimes I believe the lie
That God don’t provide for His child when they obey, that’s so cray
You calling me to freedom, I think that it’s time to walk
I don’t see every step but the next is out of the dark
I’m the filthiest of them all but I’m Yours if you wash me
From that sin by the blood of that cross, I’m yours