randolph returns skit
(Dial)
(Phone ringing)
Visionary Music Group, this is Vanessa speaking. How can I help you?
Hi, uh, I was just wondering, is Chris Zarou available right now?
Oh, I'm sorry. Chris is in a meeting with Barry White at the moment. Can I take a message?
Oh, no, no, that's alright. Um, is Logic there?
No. Logic isn't here
Oh, um... well, do you think, by chance, I could have his phone number, please?
His phone number?
Uh, yeah... well, I-I already had his number. It's not like that. I just... misplaced it...
Who is this?
Oh, um... My name's Marty, Marty Randolph
You can leave a message if you'd like
Yeah, I'm just gonna be one hundred percent honest with you... um, I need his number. Can you just give me Logic's number? Please? Please? Can you just gimme, gimme, gimme...
I'm sorry. I'm not allowed to divulge that information
No, what you don't understand, it's- its's not like you're divulging informa- I already had it. It's just...I need you to just open up your little black book and- and- Jesus Christ! C'mon!
Well, Mr. Randolph, there's nothing more I can do for you
Alright, bitch, you're gonna give me that fucking number right now! You're gonna loo- on your computer or book or whatever the hell you're looking at right now, and you're gonna give me his goddamn number, because he was supposed to sign with me, not Visionary and go do awesome things with Def Jam! What the fuck is that shit?
If you keep speaking to me like that, Marty, I'm gonna have to hang up on you
Oh yeah! Yeah, you're gonna hang up on me? You're gonna hang up on Marty Randolph? I da- no, I double-dog fucking dare ya', you slut! Now, gimme the number!
Visionary doesn't pay me enough money to deal with this shit!
Yeah? That's cause Visionary ain't shit! And you're not shit! And fucking Logic isn't shit! And I was supposed to have him first! He was supposed to sign his soul! Sell out! Just give me the number! Fuck!
Fuck you, and have a good day! (Hangs up phone)
... Hello? Eh- Have a good day