sell out records skit
"Hello?"
"Yes, hi, is this Logic?"
"Yeah. This is Logic. What's up?"
"Hi, Logic. How ya doing? This is Marty Randolph, big-time, big-league, record-executive, super-white-guy afficionado, and I just, uh, want to talk to you about a couple things."
"Alright man, what is this regarding exactly?"
"Basically, what we want to do is we want to take Logic, we want to take everything about you, and we want to take it and put it on a bigger level. How's that sound?"
"I mean that sounds great, man! What do you have in mind?"
"Basically, okay, you know that whole thing that compiles you? The whole "Young Sinatra," smooth, intellectual lyrics, the realism of who you are and how you project that, everything that you do with your music?"
"Yeah, man, thanks. I'm glad you spotted that out."
"Basically, what we're going to do is get rid of that, okay? We want to put you in the limelight with a bunch of bitches and popping bottles... cos nobody cares about that stuff."
[Logic
"...what?"
"Yeah, I know, right?! It sounds amazing! Maybe you might be aware of some previous work that we've done. Basically what we want to do is: have nobody remember you in five years."
"I don't know man... I really don't know..."
"Have you ever heard of Young Lollipop? Or Little Chedda?"
"Naw. Naw, man I haven't."
"Exactly. That's the point!"
"Wait... where did you say you were calling from again?"
"Oh, I'm just calling from, uh... Sell Out Records."
"What?! Sell Out Records?!..."
"Yeah!"
"Oh my God. Wait... like you, like, sell out stadiums and stuff?"
"Naw, man. Sell out like you... like you know... you know. This is what it is, man: Illuminati."
"What?! Illuminati?!"
"Yes, Logic. It's your time now."
(laughing) "Yo, man, who put you up to this? Lenbo?"
"Uh, no. No. Uh, I don't know where else to look. Look, just sign with us."
"Naw, I'm straight, brah." (hangs up)
"Oh... hello? Hello? (pause) Damn it! He hung up. These rappers are usually the easiest ones to convert...".