If you will not desert me,
your salary next year shall be double; and that will enable you to marry
your cousin immediately. Nothing is more improbable than that any of us
should be sick; but, if this should happen to you, I plight my honour
that you shall be carefully and faithfully attended.' "These assurances were solemn and generous. To make Susan Hadwin my wife
was the scope of all my wishes and labours. By staying, I should hasten
this desirable event, and incur little hazard. By going, I should
alienate the affections of Thetford; by whom, it is but justice to
acknowledge, that I had hitherto been treated with unexampled generosity
and kindness; and blast all the schemes I had formed for rising into
wealth. "My resolution was by no means steadfast. As often as a letter from
_Malverton_ arrived, I felt myself disposed to hasten away; but this
inclination was combated by new arguments and new entreaties of
Thetford. "In this state of suspense, the girl by whom Mrs. Thetford's infant was
nursed fell sick. She was an excellent creature, and merited better
treatment than she received. Like me, she resisted the persuasions of
her friends, but her motives for remaining were disinterested and
heroic. "No sooner did her indisposition appear, than she was hurried to the
hospital. I saw that no reliance could be placed upon the assurances of
Thetford. Every consideration gave way to his fear of death. After the
girl's departure, though he knew that she was led by his means to
execution, yet he consoled himself by repeating and believing her
assertions, that her disease was not _the fever_. "I was now greatly alarmed for my own safety. I was determined to
encounter his anger and repel his persuasions; and to depart with the
market-man next morning. That night, however, I was seized with a
violent fever. I knew in what manner patients were treated at the
hospital, and removal thither was to the last degree abhorred. "The morning arrived, and my situation was discovered. At the first
intimation, Thetford rushed out of the house, and refused to re-enter it
till I was removed. I knew not my fate, till three ruffians made their
appearance at my bedside, and communicated their commission. "I called on the name of Thetford and his wife. I entreated a moment's
delay, till I had seen these persons, and endeavoured to procure a
respite from my sentence. They were deaf to my entreaties, and prepared
to execute their office by force. I was delirious with rage and terror. I heaped the bitterest execrations on my murderer; and by turns, invoked
the compassion of, and poured a torrent of reproaches on, the wretches
whom he had selected for his ministers. My struggles and outcries were
vain. "I have no perfect recollection of what passed till my arrival at the
hospital. My passions combined with my disease to make me frantic and
wild. In a state like mine, the slightest motion could not be endured
without agony. What then must I have felt, scorched and dazzled by the
sun, sustained by hard boards, and borne for miles over a rugged
pavement? "I cannot make you comprehend the anguish of my feelings. To be
disjointed and torn piecemeal by the rack was a torment inexpressibly
inferior to this. Nothing excites my wonder but that I did not expire
before the cart had moved three paces. "I knew not how, or by whom, I was moved from this vehicle. Insensibility came at length to my relief. After a time I opened my
eyes, and slowly gained some knowledge of my situation. I lay upon a
mattress, whose condition proved that a half-decayed corpse had recently
been dragged from it. The room was large, but it was covered with beds
like my own. Between each, there was scarcely the interval of three
feet. Each sustained a wretch, whose groans and distortions bespoke the
desperateness of his condition. "The atmosphere was loaded by mortal stenches. A vapour, suffocating and
malignant, scarcely allowed me to breathe. No suitable receptacle was
provided for the evacuations produced by medicine or disease. My nearest
neighbour was struggling with death, and my bed, casually extended, was
moist with the detestable matter which had flowed from his stomach. "You will scarcely believe that, in this scene of horrors, the sound of
laughter should be overheard. While the upper rooms of this building are
filled with the sick and the dying, the lower apartments are the scene
of carousals and mirth. The wretches who are hired, at enormous wages,
to tend the sick and convey away the dead, neglect their duty, and
consume the cordials which are provided for the patients, in debauchery
and riot. "A female visage, bloated with malignity and drunkenness, occasionally
looked in. Dying eyes were cast upon her, invoking the boon, perhaps, of
a drop of cold water, or her assistance to change a posture which
compelled him to behold the ghastly writhings or deathful _smile_ of his
neighbour. "The visitant had left the banquet for a moment, only to see who was
dead. If she entered the room, blinking eyes and reeling steps showed
her to be totally unqualified for ministering the aid that was needed. Presently she disappeared, and others ascended the staircase, a coffin
was deposited at the door, the wretch, whose heart still quivered, was
seized by rude hands, and dragged along the floor into the passage. "Oh! how poor are the conceptions which are formed, by the fortunate
few, of the sufferings to which millions of their fellow-beings are
condemned. This misery was more frightful, because it was seen to flow
from the depravity of the attendants. My own eyes only would make me
credit the existence of wickedness so enormous. No wonder that to die in
garrets, and cellars, and stables, unvisited and unknown, had, by so
many, been preferred to being brought hither. "A physician cast an eye upon my state. He gave some directions to the
person who attended him. I did not comprehend them, they were never
executed by the nurses, and, if the attempt had been made, I should
probably have refused to receive what was offered. Recovery was equally
beyond my expectations and my wishes. The scene which was hourly
displayed before me, the entrance of the sick, most of whom perished in
a few hours, and their departure to the graves prepared for them,
reminded me of the fate to which I, also, was reserved. "Three days passed away, in which every hour was expected to be the
last. That, amidst an atmosphere so contagious and deadly, amidst causes
of destruction hourly accumulating, I should yet survive, appears to me
nothing less than miraculous. That of so many conducted to this house
the only one who passed out of it alive should be myself almost
surpasses my belief. "Some inexplicable principle rendered harmless those potent enemies of
human life. My fever subsided and vanished. My strength was revived, and
the first use that I made of my limbs was to bear me far from the
contemplation and sufferance of those evils." CHAPTER XIX.