But yet, I not to do this, because that in the same time that she did so
stir me to love and admirings, she to set somewhat else in me at
variance, so that I did half to feel stern with her, for I perceived
that she had that naughtiness then within her, that she did be like to
have a real intent of impertinence unto me, so that she should be
naughtily outrageous, and to have no heed to my advisings, neither unto
my desires, unless that I set my hand upon her, to _make_ her to obey. And truly, you that have had dear maids, shall follow mine explainings;
but unto others, I know not whether they shall understand, until they
too have been possessed of One that shall set all their heart adrift,
even as this One that did be Mine Own. And sudden, I to know that Naani did change from her low singing unto an
olden air that had surely not been heard in all that eternity. And in
verity, for a little while, I not to know why that it did so shake all
my heart; nor what it did be; nor whether that I had truly heard it
before, or only to think so. And, surely, it did be as that the silence of the olden moonlit world
did steal all about me; and sudden, I to know that the Maid did sing an
olden love-song of the olden world, and to go halting a little as she
sang, because that the words did steal something odd-wise through the
far veils of her memory, even as a song doth come backward out of
dreams. And I to feel all my blood to seem to tremble in my veins, and my throat
to be troubled, as with vague sobs that did be the ghosts of forgotten
tears. And the dim sorrow that had come so swift and strange upon me, to
be likewise steeped in golden mists of the love that I once did love;
and the glamour to be come all fresh upon me, and I to know in that
moment how much we do forget, even when that we do believe that we have
all memory and all sorrow within our hearts. And I lookt unto the Maid, something dimly, because of the way that I
did be; and I perceived in a moment that Mine Own did weep as she
walked; but the less with pain than with the strange anguish of Memory,
that doth have in it Tenderness and Sorrow and Love and all that Hath
Been and all that Did Never Be, and all to make a Vale unto the Spirit,
where doth be both a dim greyness and a warm and everlasting light, and
an utter speechlessness, and the low and far music of forgotten songs,
that do come downward over the shadowy mountains that do be builded of
Years and Forgetfulness, and yet made to be seen with the light of that
our Memory, which doth cast so many husht shadows. And surely, as I did say, the Maid did weep as she went; but not to be
cast down; but rather that she held her head upwise, as that she did
walk in a glory. And the song to come oft-broke, and oddly, and to set
her voice to little human quiverings, as her memory did shake her sweet
spirit unto tears afresh; and she to walk with her pretty head upheld
and as that she did go in a Triumph; and the tears to come down
strangely upon her face, and all her soul to be there, pure and
wondrous, and in the same time both troubled and glad. And this thing to be very dear and amazing; and she to be as that she
not to know then that she sang; but as that she did be lost in her
thoughts, as we do say, and this to have come sudden upon her, out of
all her upliftedness of spirit, that had been like to make her very open
unto all subtile and subtle powers of thought and inward stirrings, as
you shall think. And again the song to come full-remembered, and fresh, as that this
Eternity did be but the yesterday of that moment. And Mine Own to be
all in a sweet madness with those half-dreamed memories, and the wonder
and pain of all that no man hath ever said, and that shall be never
said; and of the utter lost years, and all that hath been lost, and all
forgotten greatness and splendour, and the dreadfulness of parting, and
the loveliness of beautiful things that do be hid in the abyss of the
years. And it did be sudden to my quickened fancy, that there did be low echoes
all about us, of the voices of dear beautiful ones that have died; for
so did memory set a strange and lovely mystery about my spirit in that
moment, that I did be all shaken so much as Mine Own. And I to be as
that I drew my breath anigh to tears, and did be there with Naani amid
the quiet spareness of the trees and the rock of that part of the land;
but yet did be to see half dimly that I stood within a light, even as
the light that doth be the wonder of olden sunsets; and I to be, in the
same time, both _that_ man and _this_ man that now doth write; and to
have beside my spirit but one maid, that I did lack to know whether I
say to her Naani or Mirdath; for though the two that have been Mine Own
did be different-seeming to the eye, there to be but the spirit of one
maid beside me in that moment. And surely, I did be there, all shaken unto the seeing of visions, as it
did seem; so that the Land about me to have grown half as that it did
lack that it be real unto my sight, because that I lookt inward unto
Lands that did be of Memory. And lo! in a moment this to go; and I to be
in that Country of the Seas, and to look newly unto Naani, and she to go
as I have told; and there to be the lonesome trees and the rocks in all
parts for a great way about. And sudden, as I lookt at Mine Own, she to come round unto me, and she
held out her arms, and did gaze at me with such a love, as that she were
transfigured, and to need strangely that she be in mine arms; and
surely, I to an holy need that I have her unto me, because that, after
all, there did be no wonder so great as that wonder, that when all did
be said I did have Mine Own, after that all Eternity had nigh past. And, in verity, we ran each to the other, and did be silent, because
that there was no speech of words by which we could say aught of all
that did be in our hearts. And truly you to be with me in understanding;
for you too, mayhap, to have suffered thiswise of dumbness; even if that
it hath not been so great. But yet to make you to know. And presently, we grew quiet in the spirit; and Mine Own to come back
again to her joyousness, and to go beside by me, as we made forward. And presently, Naani to begin that she look at me with dear impudences
again, that did be very sweet unto me; but yet to be like to lead unto
defyings. And truly, by these things shall you know the spirit of Mine Own Maid;
and there to be none to me that ever did be like her. But, indeed, you
to think thatwise of the maid that you did love; and all the world to be
thinking each these thoughts of one dear maiden that doth be the one
maid in all the round world. And this to be the lovely niceness of the human heart; and I not to have
any grumble thereat; but yet, surely, you shall say that this Maid that
did be Mine Own, did be very dear and lovely.