I perceived that the words
they spoke sometimes produced pleasure or pain, smiles or sadness, in
the minds and countenances of the hearers. This was indeed a godlike
science, and I ardently desired to become acquainted with it. But I was
baffled in every attempt I made for this purpose. Their pronunciation
was quick; and the words they uttered, not having any apparent connexion
with visible objects, I was unable to discover any clue by which I could
unravel the mystery of their reference. By great application, however,
and after having remained during the space of several revolutions of the
moon in my hovel, I discovered the names that were given to some of the
most familiar objects of discourse: I learned and applied the words
_fire_, _milk_, _bread_, and _wood_. I learned also the names of the
cottagers themselves. The youth and his companion had each of them
several names, but the old man had only one, which was _father_. The
girl was called _sister_, or _Agatha_; and the youth _Felix_, _brother_,
or _son_. I cannot describe the delight I felt when I learned the ideas
appropriated to each of these sounds, and was able to pronounce them. I
distinguished several other words, without being able as yet to
understand or apply them; such as _good_, _dearest_, _unhappy_. “I spent the winter in this manner. The gentle manners and beauty of the
cottagers greatly endeared them to me: when they were unhappy, I felt
depressed; when they rejoiced, I sympathized in their joys. I saw few
human beings beside them; and if any other happened to enter the
cottage, their harsh manners and rude gait only enhanced to me the
superior accomplishments of my friends. The old man, I could perceive,
often endeavoured to encourage his children, as sometimes I found that
he called them, to cast off their melancholy. He would talk in a
cheerful accent, with an expression of goodness that bestowed pleasure
even upon me. Agatha listened with respect, her eyes sometimes filled
with tears, which she endeavoured to wipe away unperceived; but I
generally found that her countenance and tone were more cheerful after
having listened to the exhortations of her father. It was not thus with
Felix. He was always the saddest of the groupe; and, even to my
unpractised senses, he appeared to have suffered more deeply than his
friends. But if his countenance was more sorrowful, his voice was more
cheerful than that of his sister, especially when he addressed the old
man. “I could mention innumerable instances, which, although slight, marked
the dispositions of these amiable cottagers. In the midst of poverty and
want, Felix carried with pleasure to his sister the first little white
flower that peeped out from beneath the snowy ground. Early in the
morning before she had risen, he cleared away the snow that obstructed
her path to the milk-house, drew water from the well, and brought the
wood from the out-house, where, to his perpetual astonishment, he found
his store always replenished by an invisible hand. In the day, I
believe, he worked sometimes for a neighbouring farmer, because he often
went forth, and did not return until dinner, yet brought no wood with
him. At other times he worked in the garden; but, as there was little to
do in the frosty season, he read to the old man and Agatha. “This reading had puzzled me extremely at first; but, by degrees, I
discovered that he uttered many of the same sounds when he read as when
he talked. I conjectured, therefore, that he found on the paper signs
for speech which he understood, and I ardently longed to comprehend
these also; but how was that possible, when I did not even understand
the sounds for which they stood as signs? I improved, however, sensibly
in this science, but not sufficiently to follow up any kind of
conversation, although I applied my whole mind to the endeavour: for I
easily perceived that, although I eagerly longed to discover myself to
the cottagers, I ought not to make the attempt until I had first become
master of their language; which knowledge might enable me to make them
overlook the deformity of my figure; for with this also the contrast
perpetually presented to my eyes had made me acquainted. “I had admired the perfect forms of my cottagers—their grace, beauty,
and delicate complexions: but how was I terrified, when I viewed myself
in a transparent pool! At first I started back, unable to believe that
it was indeed I who was reflected in the mirror; and when I became fully
convinced that I was in reality the monster that I am, I was filled with
the bitterest sensations of despondence and mortification. Alas! I did
not yet entirely know the fatal effects of this miserable deformity. “As the sun became warmer, and the light of day longer, the snow
vanished, and I beheld the bare trees and the black earth. From this
time Felix was more employed; and the heart-moving indications of
impending famine disappeared. Their food, as I afterwards found, was
coarse, but it was wholesome; and they procured a sufficiency of it. Several new kinds of plants sprung up in the garden, which they dressed;
and these signs of comfort increased daily as the season advanced. “The old man, leaning on his son, walked each day at noon, when it did
not rain, as I found it was called when the heavens poured forth its
waters. This frequently took place; but a high wind quickly dried the
earth, and the season became far more pleasant than it had been. “My mode of life in my hovel was uniform. During the morning I attended
the motions of the cottagers; and when they were dispersed in various
occupations, I slept: the remainder of the day was spent in observing my
friends. When they had retired to rest, if there was any moon, or the
night was star-light, I went into the woods, and collected my own food
and fuel for the cottage. When I returned, as often as it was necessary,
I cleared their path from the snow, and performed those offices that I
had seen done by Felix. I afterwards found that these labours, performed
by an invisible hand, greatly astonished them; and once or twice I heard
them, on these occasions, utter the words _good spirit_, _wonderful_;
but I did not then understand the signification of these terms. “My thoughts now became more active, and I longed to discover the
motives and feelings of these lovely creatures; I was inquisitive to
know why Felix appeared so miserable, and Agatha so sad. I thought
(foolish wretch!) that it might be in my power to restore happiness to
these deserving people. When I slept, or was absent, the forms of the
venerable blind father, the gentle Agatha, and the excellent Felix,
flitted before me. I looked upon them as superior beings, who would be
the arbiters of my future destiny. I formed in my imagination a thousand
pictures of presenting myself to them, and their reception of me.