"Oh, that's nothing," said Ben; "I think I shall like it, especially if
it's any pleasure to you. I suppose that's what you call a Christian
consolation. Will you sit down, Mr. Tulip?" "My name aint Tulip, but Lupin; but if you wish it, I don't mind sitting
down, of course." The beef-eater, with a movement of his foot, kicked away the reverend
gentleman's chair, and down he sat with a dab upon the floor. "My dear," said Mr. Oakley to Johanna, "you go to bed, and then your
mother can't say you have anything to do with this affair. I intend to
rid my house of this man. Good night, my dear, good night." Johanna kissed her father on the cheek, and then left the room, not at
all sorry that so vigorous a movement was about being made for the
suppression of Mr. Lupin. When she was gone, Mrs. Oakley spoke, saying--

"Mr. Lupin, I bid you good night, and, of course, after the rough
treatment of these wretches, I can hardly expect you to come again. Good
night, Mr. Lupin, good night." "That's all very well, marm," said Ben, "but before this ere wild beast
of a parson goes away, I want to admonish him. He don't seem to be wide
awake, and I must rouse him up." Ben took hold of the reverend gentleman's nose, and gave it such an
awful pinch, that when he took his finger and thumb away, it was
perfectly blue. "Murder! oh, murder! my nose! my nose!" shrieked Mr. Lupin, and at that
moment Mrs. Oakley, who was afraid to attack Ben, gave her husband such
an open-handed whack on the side of his head, that the little man reeled
again, and saw a great many more lights than the Rev. Mr. Lupin had done
under the influence of the mulled wine. "Very good," said Ben; "now we are getting into, the thick of it." [Illustration: Big Ben Compels Mr. Lupin To Do Penance.] With this Ben took from his pocket a coil of rope, one end of which was
a noose, and that he dexterously threw over Mrs. Oakley's head. "Murder!" she shrieked. "Oakley, are you going to see me murdered before
your eyes?" "There is such a singing in my ears," said Mr. Oakley, "that I can't see
anything." "This is the way," said Ben, "we manages the wild beastesses when they
shuts their ears to all sorts of argument. Now, marm, if you please, a
little this way." Ben looked about until he found a strong hook in the wall, over which,
in consequence of his great height, he was enabled to draw the rope, and
then the other end of it he tied securely to the leg of a heavy
secretaire that was in the room, so that Mrs. Oakley was well secured. "Murder!" she cried. "Oakley, are you a man, that you stand by and see
me treated in this way by this big brute?" "I can't see anything," said Mr. Oakley; "there is such a singing in my
ears; I told you so before--I can't see anything." "Now, ma'am, you may just say what you like," said Ben; "it won't matter
a bit, any more than the grumbling of a bear with a sore head; and as
for you, Mr. Tulip, you'll just get down on your knees, and beg Mr.
Oakley's pardon for coming and drinking his tea without his leave, and
having the infernal impudence to speak to his daughter." "Don't do it, Mr. Lupin," cried Mrs. Oakley--"don't do it." "You hear," said Ben, "what the lady advises. Now, I am quite different;
I advise you to do it--for, if you don't, I shan't hurt you, but it
strikes me I shall be obliged to fall on you and crush you." "I think I will," said Mr. Lupin: "the saints were always forced to
yield to the Philistines." "If you call me any names," said Ben, "I'll just wring your neck,"

"Young man, young man, let me exhort you. Allow me to go, and I will put
up prayers for your conversion." "Confound your impudence! what do you suppose the beasts in the Tower
would do, if I was converted? Why, that 'ere tiger, we have had lately,
would eat his own tail, to think as I had turned out such an ass. Come,
I can't waste any more of my precious time; and if you don't get down on
your knees directly, we'll see what we can do." "I must," said Mr. Lupin, "I must, I suppose;" and down he flopped on
his knees. "Very good; now repeat after me.--I am a wolf that stole sheeps'
clothing." "Yes; 'I am a wolf that stole sheeps' clothing'--the Lord forgive me." "Perhaps he may, and perhaps he mayn't. Now go on--all that's wirtuous
is my loathing." "Oh dear, yes--'all that's wirtuous is my loathing.'" "Mr. Oakley, I have offended." "Yes; I am a miserable sinner, Mr. Oakley, I have offended." "And asks his pardon, on my bended--"

"Oh dear, yes--I asks his pardon on my bended--The Lord have mercy upon
us, miserable sinners!" "Knees--I won't do so no more." "Yes,--knees, I won't do so no more." "As sure as I lies on this floor." "Yes,--as sure as I lies on this floor.--Death and the devil, you've
killed me!" Ben took hold of the reverend gentleman by the back of the neck, and
pressed his head down upon the floor, until his nose, which had before
been such a sufferer, was nearly completely flattened with his face. "Now you may go;" said Ben. Mr. Lupin scrambled to his feet; but Ben followed him into the passage,
and did not yet let him go, until he had accelerated his movements by
two hearty kicks. And then the victorious beef-eater returned to the
parlour. "Why, Ben," said Mr. Oakley, "you are quite a poet." "I believe you, Oakley, my boy," said Ben, "and now let us be off, and
have a pint round the corner." "What!" exclaimed Mrs. Oakley, "and leave me here, you wretches?" "Yes," said Ben, "unless you promises never to be a female variety of a
useful animal again, and begs pardon of Mr. Oakley, for giving him all
this trouble; as for me, I'll let you off cheap, you shall only give me
a kiss, and say you loves me." "If I do, may I be--"

"Damned, you mean." "No, I don't; choked I was going to say." "Then you may be choked, for you have nothing to do but to let your legs
go from under you, and you will be hung as comfortable as possible--come
along, Oakley." "Mr. Oakley--stop, stop--don't leave me here. I am sorry." "That's enough," said Mr. Oakley; "and now, my dear, bear in mind one
thing from me--I intend from this time forward to be master in my own
house. If you and I are to live together, we must do so on very
different terms to what we have been living, and if you won't make
yourself agreeable, Lawyer Hutchins tells me that I can turn you out and
give you a maintenance; and, in that case, I'll have my sister Rachel
home to mind house for me; so now you know my determination, and what
you have to expect. If you wish to begin, well, do so at once, by
getting something nice and tasty for Ben's supper." Mrs. Oakley made the required promise, and being released, she set about
preparations for the supper in real earnest, but whether was really
subdued or not we shall, in due time, see. CHAPTER X. THE COLONEL AND HIS FRIEND.