Now, sir, I
suppose you want to be shaved, and it is well you have come here, for
there aint a shaving-shop, although I say it, in the city of London that
ever thinks of polishing anybody off as I do." "I tell you what it is, master barber: if you come that laugh again, I
will get up and go. I don't like it, and there is an end of it." "Very good," said Sweeney Todd, as he mixed up a lather. "Who are you? where did you come from? and where are you going?" "That's cool, at all events. Damn it! what do you mean by putting the
brush in my mouth? Now, don't laugh; and since you are so fond of asking
questions, just answer me one." "Oh, yes, of course: what is it, sir?" "Do you know a Mr. Oakley, who lives somewhere in London, and is a
spectacle-maker?" "Yes, to be sure I do--John Oakley, the spectacle-maker, in Fore-street,
and he has got a daughter named Johanna, that the young bloods call the
Flower of Fore-street." "Ah, poor thing! do they? Now, confound you! what are you laughing at
now? What do you mean by it?" "Didn't you say, 'Ah, poor thing?' Just turn your head a little a one
side; that will do. You have been to sea, sir?" "Yes, I have, and have only now lately come up the river from an Indian
voyage." "Indeed! where can my strop be? I had it this minute; I must have laid
it down somewhere. What an odd thing that I can't see it! It's very
extraordinary; what can have become of it? Oh, I recollect, I took it
into the parlour. Sit still, sir, I shall not be gone a moment; sit
still, sir, if you please. By the by, you can amuse yourself with the
_Courier_, sir, for a moment." Sweeney Todd walked into the back parlour and closed the door. There was a strange sound suddenly, compounded of a rushing noise and
then a heavy blow, immediately after which Sweeney Todd emerged from his
parlour, and folding his arms, he looked upon _the vacant chair_ where
his customer had been seated, but the customer was _gone_, leaving not
the slightest trace of his presence behind except his hat, and that
Sweeney Todd immediately seized and thrust into a cupboard that was at
one corner of the shop. "What's that?" he said, "what's that? I thought I heard a noise." "If you please, sir, I have forgot the money, and have run all the way
back from St. Paul's churchyard." In two strides Todd reached him, and clutching him by the arm he dragged
him into the farther corner of the shop, and then he stood opposite to
him, glaring him full in the face with such a demoniac expression that
the boy was frightfully terrified. "Speak!" cried Todd, "speak! and speak the truth, or your last hour has
come. How long were you peeping through the door before you came in?" "Peeping, sir?" "Yes, peeping; don't repeat my words, but answer me at once, you will
find it better for you in the end." "I wasn't peeping, sir, at all." Sweeney Todd drew a long breath as he then said, in a strange, shrieking
sort of manner, which he intended, no doubt, should be jocose,--

"Well, well, very well; if you did peep, what then? it's no matter; I
only wanted to know, that's all; it was quite a joke, wasn't it--quite
funny, though rather odd, eh? Why don't you laugh, you dog? Come, now,
there is no harm done. Tell me what you thought about it at once, and we
will be merry over it--very merry." "I don't know what you mean, sir," said the boy, who was quite as much
alarmed at Mr. Todd's mirth as he was at his anger. "I don't know what
you mean, sir; I only just come back because I hadn't any money to pay
for the biscuits at Peterson's." "I mean nothing at all," said Todd, suddenly turning upon his heel;
"what's that scratching at the door?" Tobias opened the shop-door, and there stood the dog, who looked
wistfully round the place, and then gave a howl which seriously alarmed
the barber. "It's the gentleman's dog, sir," said Tobias, "its the gentleman's dog,
sir, that was looking at old St. Dunstan's clock, and came in here to be
shaved. It's funny, aint it, sir, that the dog didn't go away with his
master?" "Why don't you laugh if it's funny? Turn out the dog, Tobias; we'll have
no dogs here; I hate the sight of them; turn him out--turn him out." "I would, sir, in a minute; but I'm afraid he wouldn't let me, somehow. Only look, sir--look; see what he is at now! did you ever see such a
violent fellow, sir? why he will have down the cupboard door." "Stop him--stop him! the devil is in the animal! stop him I say!" The dog was certainly getting the door open, when Sweeney Todd rushed
forward to stop him! but that he was soon admonished of the danger of
doing, for the dog gave him a grip of the leg, which made him give such
a howl, that he precipitately retreated, and left the animal to do its
pleasure. This consisted in forcing open the cupboard door, and seizing
upon the hat which Sweeney Todd had thrust therein, and dashing out of
the shop with it in triumph. "The devil's in the beast," muttered Todd, "he's off! Tobias, you said
you saw the man who owned that fiend of a cur looking at St. Dunstan's
church." "Yes, sir, I did see him there. If you recollect, you sent me to see the
time, and the figures were just going to strike three quarters past six;
and before I came away, I heard him say that Mark Ingestrie was dead,
and Johanna should have the string of pearls. Then I came in, and then,
if you recollect, sir, he came in, and the odd thing, you know, to me,
sir, is that he didn't take his dog with him, because you know, sir--"

"Because what?" shouted Todd. "Because people generally do take their dogs with them, you know, sir;
and may I be made into one of Lovett's pies, if I don't--"

"Hush, some one comes; it's old Mr. Grant, from the Temple. How do you
do, Mr. Grant? glad to see you looking so well, sir. It does one's heart
good to see a gentlemen of your years looking so fresh and hearty. Sit
down, sir; a little this way, if you please. Shaved, I suppose?" "Yes, Todd, yes. Any news?" "No, sir, nothing stirring. Everything very quiet, sir, except the high
wind. They say it blew the king's hat off yesterday, sir, and he
borrowed Lord North's. Trade is dull too, sir. I suppose people won't
come out to be cleaned and dressed in a mizling rain. We haven't had
anybody in the shop for an hour and a half." "Lor' sir," said Tobias, "you forget the sea-faring gentleman with the
dog, you know, sir." "Ah! so I do," said Todd. "He went away, and I saw him get into some
disturbance, I think, just at the corner of the market." "I wonder I didn't meet him, sir," said Tobias, "for I came that way;
and then it's so very odd leaving his dog behind him." "Yes, very," said Todd. "Will you excuse me a moment, Mr. Grant? Tobias,
my lad, I just want you to lend me a hand in the parlour."