"Haity taity, one must not speak next, I suppose. Some people fancy that
other people know nothing, but there is such a thing as overhearing what
some people say to other people." Johanna had not the most remote notion of what her mother meant, but
Mrs. Oakley's tongue was like many pieces of machinery, that when once
set in motion are not without considerable trouble brought to a
standstill again, so on she went. "Of course. I now know quite well why the godly man who would have made
you a chosen vessel was refused. It was all owing to that scamp, Mark
Ingestrie." "Mother!" "Marry come up! you need not look at me in such a way. We don't all of
us see with the same eyes. A scamp he is, and a scamp he will be." "Mother, he whom you so name is with his God. Mention him no more. The
wild ocean rolls over his body--his soul is in heaven. Speak not
irreverently of one whose sole crime was that he loved me. Oh, mother,
mother, you--"

Johanna could say no more, she burst into tears. "Well," said Mrs. Oakley, "if he is dead, pray what hinders you from
listening to the chosen vessel, I should like to know?" "Do not. Oh do not, mother, say any more to me--I cannot, dare not trust
myself to speak to you upon such a subject." "What is this?" said Mr. Oakley, stepping into the room. "Johanna in
tears! What has happened?" [Illustration: Mr. Oakley Defends Johanna From The Violence Of Her
Mother.] "Father--dear father!" "And Mr. O.," cried Mrs. Oakley, "what business is it of yours, I should
like to know? Be so good, sir, as to attend to your spectacles, and such
like rubbish, and not to interfere with my daughter." "Dear me!--ain't she my daughter likewise?" "Oh yes, Mr. O.! Go on with your base, vile, wretched, contemptible,
unmanly insinuations. Do go on, pray--I like it. Oh, you odious wretch! You spectacle-making monster!" "Do not," cried Johanna, who saw the heightened colour of her father's
cheek. "Oh, do not let me be the unhappy cause of any quarrelling. Father! father!" "Hush, my dear, don't you say another word. Cousin Ben is coming to take
a little bit of lunch with us to-day." "I know it," cried Mrs. Oakley, clapping her hands together with a
vengeance that made Oakley jump again. "I know it. Oh, you wretch. You
couldn't have put on such airs if your bully had not been coming; I
thought the last time he came here was enough for him. Aye, and for you
too, Mr. O." "It was nearly too much," said the spectacle-maker, shaking his head. "Tow row, row, row, row!" cried Big Ben, popping his head into the
parlour, "what do you all bring it in now? Wilful murder with the chill
off or what? Ah, mother Oakley, what's the price of vinegar now,
wholesale--pluck does it. Here you is. Ha, ha! Aint we a united family. Couldn't stay away from you, Mother Oakley, no more nor I could from
that ere laughing hyena we has in the Tower." "Eugh!--wretch!" "Sit down, Ben," said Mr. Oakley. "I am glad to see you, and I am quite
sure Johanna is." "Oh, yes, yes." "That's it," said Ben. "It's on Johanna's account I came. Now, little
one, just tell me--"

Johanna had just time to place her finger upon her lips, unobserved by
any one, and shake her head at Ben. "Ah--hem! How are you, eh?" he said, turning the conversation. "Come,
Mother O., stir your old stumps and be alive, will you? I have come to
lunch with your lord and master, so bustle--bustle." Mrs. Oakley rose, and placing her hands upon her hips, she looked at
Ben, as she said--

"You great, horrid, man-mountain of a wretch. I only wonder you ain't
afraid, after the proper punishment you had on the occasion of your last
visit, to show your horrid face here again?" "You _deludes_ to the physicking, I suppose, mum. Lor bless you, it did
us no end of good; but, howsomedever, we provide agin wice in animals
when we knows on it aforehand, do you see. Oh, there you is." A boy howled out from the shop--"Did a gentleman order two gallons of
half-and-half here, please?" "All's right," said Ben. "Now, Mother O., the only thing I'll trouble
you for, is a knife and fork. As for the rest of the combustibles, here
they is." Ben took from one capacious pocket a huge parcel, containing about six
pounds of boiled beef, and from the other he took as much ham. "Hold hard!" he cried to the boy who brought the beer. "Take this
half-crown, my lad, and get three quartern loaves." "But, Ben," said old Mr. Oakley, "I really had no intention, when I
asked you to come to lunch this morning, of making you provide it
yourself. We have, or we ought to have, plenty of everything in the
house." "Old birds," said Ben, "isn't to be caught twice. A fellow, arter he has
burnt his fingers, is afeard o' playing with the fire. No, Mrs. O., you
gave us a benefit last time, and I ain't a-going to try my luck again. All's right--pitch into the grub. How is the chosen vessel, Mother O.? All right, eh?" Mrs. Oakley waited until Ben had made an immense sandwich of ham and
beef; and then in an instant, before he was aware of what she was about,
she caught it up, and slapped it in his face with a vengeance that was
quite staggering. "Easy does it," said Ben. "Take that, you great, fat elephant." "Go it--go it." Mrs. Oakley bounced out of the room. Johanna looked her sorrow; and Mr.
Oakley rose from his chair, but Ben made him sit down again, saying--

"Easy does it--easy does it. Never mind her, cousin Oakley. She must
have her way sometimes. Let her kick and be off. There's no harm
done--not a bit. Lord bless you. I'm used to all sorts of cantankerous
animals." Mr. Oakley shook his head. "Forget it, father," said Johanna. "I only wish, my dear, I could forget many things; and yet there are so
many others, that I want to remember, mixed up with them, that I don't
know how I should manage to separate them one from the other." "You couldn't do it," said Ben. "Here's luck in a bag, and shake it out
as you want it." This sentiment was uttered while Ben's head was deep in the recesses of
the two-gallon can of beer, so that it had a peculiar solemn and
sonorous effect with it. After drinking about a quart, Ben withdrew the
can, and drew a long breath. "Has he brought yours?" he said. "What?--who?" "Why the other two gallons for you and Johanna." "Good gracious, Ben, you don't mean that?" "Don't I, though. Oh, here he is. All's right. Now, my lad, get the
little pint jug, with the silver top to it, and if we don't mull a drop,
I'm a sinner. Now, you'll see if Mrs. O. don't come round quite
handsome." Ben, by the aid of some sugar, succeeded in making a very palatable
drink, and just as the steam began to salute the nostrils of old Oakley
and himself, the door of the parlour was opened, and who should
heedlessly step into the room but the pious Mr. Lupin himself.