If you didnt already have enough to worry about, heres something else to keep you up at night. According to an announcement from the U.S. Sludge Warden today, the sludge will be on its way soon, and unfortunately, it doesnt look like theres anything we can do about it. The Sludge Warden warned in a press conference that the sludge is showing signs of unrest and will likely arrive any day now. Weve been carefully monitoring the situation, and what were seeing right now are conditions that are highly conducive to the sludges return, the Sludge Warden said. At this point, theres not much we can do to contain itits really just a matter of time. Do not try to run, for no man, woman, or child can escape the sludge, he continued. The sludge will envelop us all. If the circumstances werent already alarming enough, the Sludge Warden cautioned that there will be no way to predict the manner of the sludges arrival. Whether from north or south, east or west, sky or sea, the sludges approach cannot be foreseen. All that is certain is that its coming. Until the sludge does appear, the Sludge Warden is urging all Americans to take basic precautions to safeguard against its ravages, such as burying heirlooms, releasing pets back into the wild, and wrapping children and elderly in garbage bags. He has reiterated, however, that no matter what preparations one makes, the sludge will still have its way. We will not see it or hear it until it is here. What will you and your family do to prepare for the sludge? Facebook/Tweet us and let us know! 