After touring various energy plants and fusion reactors throughout the country, newly elected Iranian President Hasan Rowhani told reporters Monday that he is incredibly impressed with the Islamic republics advanced nuclear weapons program. Wow, I was originally under the impression that we were months if not years away from fully functional nuclear warheads, but theyre all pretty much ready to go, said Rowhani, adding that he was really amazed after seeing enough fully enriched weapons-grade uranium for hundreds of atomic bombs. I had no idea that our long-range rockets and launching mechanisms were so up to speed as welltheyre way further along than I thought. This is great stuff. We should be ready for test strikes any day now. Rowhani added that he is especially excited about Irans recent development of nuclear missiles capable of reaching both Tel Aviv and Washington, D.C. 