At a time when she would rather be left alone, recent divorcee Denise Jacoby, 42, is finding herself besieged by unsolicited offers of help from Birds Eye Foods coworker Donna Traschel. 'If she tells me that she's there for me anytimeday or nightone more time, I'm gonna strangle her,' Jacoby said. 'She's already lent me three different books on coping with change and overcoming loss. What do I have to do to make her understand that I don't want an ear to bend or a shoulder to lean on?' 