Able to call to mind a unique anecdote for each grease smudge, errant pen mark, and splash of barbecue sauce, local man Thomas Newcomb, 31, has a story for every single stain on his pants, sources confirmed Thursday. That brown one right there near the inseam is from Ribfest back in 08; man, that was an unbelievable weekend, Newcomb told reporters while gesturing toward his spotted and discolored pair of blue jeans, which include reminders of an array of cherished memories that include a streak of engine oil from when he patched up the carburetor on his first motorcycle, a mustard splotch from the hot dog he dropped when he caught a foul ball at a Cincinnati Reds game, and several white-looking drops from when he accidentally dumped some bleach into his laundry the day before a job interview. And then theres this bit of blood from when I tripped and fell on the way back from Paddys Pub the last night of college; God, I was pretty drunk the night I got that one. And these red wine specks are from June 8, 2009how could I forget? Thats from the party where I first met Chelsea. When asked about a series of light grass stains on his left pant leg, Newcomb reportedly grew suddenly pensive and, after an extended pause, claimed that [he didnt] want to talk about that right now. 