Seeking to reduce incidents of student violence and insubordination, the Los Angeles Unified School District voted 9-3 Monday to institute a gay-ass uniform policy. 'We feel these lame uniforms, with their dorky ties and dipwad school crests, will help create a school environment more conducive to learning,' said LAUSD board officer Jefferson Crain. 'We foresee fewer outbursts when students are forced to walk around in these retardo suits.' 