Citing his ability to score over 100 points when he is 'not even trying all that hard,' Bernie Grout, 34, announced yesterday his dream of becoming a professional bowler when he grows up. 'Ever since I was 27 and I got my first turkey, I fantasized about eventually pursuing this as a career,' said Grout, adding that his love of bowling started when he and his father used to go to the OK Alley to 'throw the ol' [bowling] ball around' when he was 26. 'Just imagine what I could do if I had my own ball and one of those gloves.' Grout plans on patiently working hard over the course of the next decade to lose some muscle mass, grow a solid moustache, and give up on all of his other dreams, so he can one day 'compete on the professional level.' 