Hoping to get as close to the stores entrance as possible, local 42-year-old Gregg Wightmans decision Wednesday to continue driving around the Costco parking lot in search of a more convenient spot reportedly produced the carbon emission that finally does it. I think I see one over thereIll just loop around, said Wightman as his vehicles exhaust system released the last quantity of greenhouse gas necessary to tip the scales on climate change and plunge the planet into an irreversible global catastrophe. Screw it, I dont want to have to push the cart all the way back out here. I think I can find one closer. At press time, Wightman had grown annoyed with the lack of adequate parking spots and resolved to just drive back to the store later. 