According to a local police report, Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera only connected on a pitiful 13 of 67 swings during an altercation with his wife Saturday, bringing his average down to .194 for the day, with a laughable .220 slugging percentage this month. 'The guy'll swing at anything,' Cabrera's wife, Rosangel, told reporters. 'The truth is, he's been whiffing all year. When he does make contact, it's just a little dinker here and a dinker there.' Though Cabrera continues to struggle, the scratches on his face indicate that his wife could be on pace to hit well over .400 this year. 