Despite the repeated efforts of Reno resident Ken Hartley, a stupid thing that cost $185 will not work as of press time Tuesday. 'The stupid thing won't work,' a visibly angered Hartley told reporters. 'You're supposed to hit both buttons at once, and then a number lights up, and you turn the switch to the 'on' position,' he said, 'but all I keep getting is these two dashes instead of numbers.' Hartley went on to state what a royal pain in the ass it was just to get the stupid thing out of the box; how mad he is that the thing doesn't even come with a warranty; and how annoying it was to call the 1-800 tech-support number included in the stupid thing's stupid booklet, only to get a useless pre-recorded message. 