Following reports that Nelson Mandela is showing sustained improvement as he recovers from a recurring lung infection, media sources confirmed Monday that the former president of South Africa must believe the worlds reporters have nothing better to do with their time than stand around like fucking idiots waiting for him to die. Oh, so hes stabilized and is showing signs of improvement? Great, Ill just be right here with my thumb up my ass, BBC News world affairs correspondent Mike Wooldridge said of the ailing civil rights champion and anti-apartheid crusader, who apparently thinks journalists must have freed up their entire schedules to stand outside a hospital all day long. But really, Im glad hes feeling better, and I sure hope he doesnt think for a second about those of us who arent allowed to return home until he dies. Really, he should take his sweet time in there, and meanwhile Ill just keep rewriting this one obituary until hes good and ready. Fucking asshole. Wooldridge added that if Mandela does happen to pull through, the two months he spent waiting for him to die would have been a complete waste of time. 