I had gotten a random call from a girl I hadn't talked to since high school.  Turned out she was in my neck of the woods and wanted to catch up. So I threw on some fresh khakis and air nikes and 2 condoms just in case. Turned out it's always better safe than sorry.
That is true, but why the air nikes? Haven't you heard about their effect on women?
No enlighten me please
They're known to cause erectile dysfunction? There's chemicals in the laces, dude! A conspiracy I tell you! Done by OBAMA!
Oh man well thankfully I was born with adamantium cartilege...because she wasn't complaining she literally just left bro