"Someone said... it'll eventually bring good luck." "But that's just a lie. and I've never heard of a god who would bestow charity on someone like me." "[Teriyaki Western Bar JANGO] [Note:" "Spoof of the movie "Sukiyaki Western Django."]" "that is." "What a seedy bar..." "There're so many shabby customers here that are just like me." "but there is a goddess..." "Come on!" "Jessica-chan!" "Look at me!" "[Note:" "Spoof of Sin City and the actress Jessica Alba who played the dancer.]" "Jessica..." "It sounds like the name of a goddess." "It looks like my luck is changing." "I'm totally wrong." "You don't have any money and yet you walk into this bar?" "!" "What a loser!" "you bastard!" "and another for the poor." "after all." "What a wonderful life." "Damn it..." "Taizo Hasegawa (38 years old).]" "[Note:" "Madao (MArude DAmena Ossan) means a totally useless old man.]" "[This is the "totally useless old man." Will something happen during his hospital stay?" "]" "hey!" "Where did you get these?" "old lady?" "Your face does look like a prune." "[Note:" "Ryugujo is a palace at the bottom of the sea where the Dragon God lives.]" "mop head!" "My friend gave these to me." "so they all went bad." "Please help us throw them out." "I wish I could help eat them." "What a waste." "you!" "Don't even think about eating these." "You'll get food poisoning from eating rotten crabs." "Stop saying things like that." "Even someone like me wouldn't stoop to eating rotten food." "it's still a samurai." "old lady." "yeah..." "Just get rid of it." "Ow..." "My stomach is spinning!" "That's why I told them not to eat it." "They're so stupid... stupid." "The Nastier It Is When It Goes Bad"]" "then there's nowhere to go but up." "But I don't know where the lowest point is." "I only remember the bad things." "my wife left me and people called me "Madao." "["I can't live with a Madao like you anymore." "From Hatsu."]" "Even kids held me in contempt. as if laughing at me." "There's nothing I can do but laugh..." "God?" "!" "idiot!" "Hasegawa-san..." "Geez." "I told you not to smoke in here." "Ah..." "Sorry..." "I just..." "And you shouldn't walk around yet." "It's not good for your injuries." "Let's get back to your room." "Y-Yeah... a nurse at this hospital." "She's a sweet person." "Takes good care of others and gives me a lot of attention." "she's like an angel." "it's like a dream that she's taking care of me like this." "But this dream can't last because a dream is..." "You said food tastes best just before it goes bad!" "That was completely rotten!" "Don't go blaming this on me!" "idiot!" "What?" "!" "You mop-head!" "Four-eyes?" "!" "please!" "they just checked in today." "Please get along with them." "Yes...my dreams always turn into nightmares." "Hey!" "What are you guys doing?" "!" "Head nurse!" "you no good patients!" "Why me?" "!" "Head Nurse!" "Stop!" "Stop!" "another helping please!" "I see..." "You are all friends of Hasegawa-san." "Hasegawa-san." "Now you won't feel lonely staying at the hospital." "Uchino-san." "We both just have rotten luck." "please don't say it." "But I guess you're really out of luck." "You were run over by a car driven by a mysterious man?" "It's rare to encounter a mystery man in civilized society." "why are you eating all my get-well gifts as if it was yours?" "you're a living reminder that there are worse things than food poisoning." "Banana Old Man." "no." "It's not "Banana Old Man." It's "Old Man's Banana." "You're eating right after getting food poisoning?" "You guys must be really healthy." "you should eat a lot and get well soon!" "too?" "!" "I have to get back to work." "Please be nice to each other." "Ouch!" "aren't they?" "take a woman who's a 7..." "Put her in a nurse's uniform and she becomes a 10." "I'll be awesome." "What would my score be?" "A 3!" "what does that mean?" "But then I'd have to start from zero." "Is it starting from zero?" "Hey!" "But something's strange..." "Huh?" "...about Uchino-san... but she's really out of her head these days." "She's not the kind of girl who'd eat someone else's banana." "What?" "You're still pissed off about bananas?" "you idiot?" "!" "I'm not talking about bananas!" "I'm just worried there's something wrong with her!" "Speak of the devil..." "What is she doing?" "Why is her face all red?" "It looks like she's staring into that patient's room..." "Ah-ha!" "but not physically sick." "hey..." "Don't tell me... they're all old farts." "There's no way she's lovesick for them." "She's got a daddy complex." "Daddy complex." "Looking at wrinkled ball sacks made her remember her dead father." "Why ball sacks?" "!" "You could've just said "wrinkly face"!" "You just like to say "ball sacks"!" "...Huh?" "Whoa!" "Wh-What's that?" "!" "There's something weird over there." "Huh?" "That is..." "Zu Zura?" "!" "you know... it can't be helped if you've already found out." "That's right..." "I'm in love...with him..." "I don't even know anything about him." "He's not even my patient." "But when we passed each other in the hallway..." "He had these intense and beautiful eyes..." "I can't stop thinking about him... but that guy's trouble." "but he's a wanted" "I don't care!" "That's all right..." "I kind of understood... that he's someone I shouldn't get close to." "He's from another world... anyway..." "As it is..." "I don't know him very well..." "Just as a beautiful memory..." "I'll keep in my heart." "You're satisfied with that?" "Talking it out makes me feel a lot better." "Thank you." "It looks like Katsura-san is here just to look after Elizabeth-san." "Elizabeth was also run over by a mysterious old geezer." "Really?" "There're so many mysterious old men around that no one's mysterious anymore." "They're just ordinary old men!" "I know!" "Let's just call him "Na-san" for short." "[Note:" "Nazo means "mysterious." Thus Na-san.]" "I really don't care." "right?" "Can't you do something?" "Huh?" "You trying to play cupid?" "An arrow shot by a cupid whose wife dumped him won't even pierce a tissue." "It's like Pochy." "Pochy." "[Note:" "Parody of Picky = Pochy]" "You leave Hatsu out of this!" "Convincing a stubborn person like him is impossible." "It's impossible." "like a junior high school student." "I don't want to owe him anything." "when are you going to pay me back for wrecking my convenience store?" "Ah..." "I had a series of misfortunes and was really depressed." "even though it was just part of her job she gave me hope." "you know a good woman deserves to be happy." "So they're discharging you tomorrow..." "Elizabeth. you've got to check for cars even if it's a green light." "Just hitting the stone bridge before crossing isn't enough in this mad world." "You need to shoot it with a bazooka before crossing." "but you know the score!" "Hasegawa-kun?" "Hasegawa-kun?" "Optimistic" and "Sweet"]" "Doctor. Hasegawa-kun?" "I wouldn't know anything about crossing bridges." "young man." "How about I give you a checkup?" "what are you doing?" "!" "Hands off me!" "I'm healthy." "Where are you taking me?" "[Neurosurgical Wing]" "I said I don't need it." "I don't have the time to worry about my own health." "Protecting the country is my only mission." "young man?" "How're you gonna take care of the country when you can't even look after yourself?" "Take a look at this." "This is a photo of your brain we just took." "I don't remember having that taken." "Hasegawa-kun?" "Hasegawa-kun?" "Please look right here." "Here." "right?" "the dark spot has grown larger." "What's going on?" "No..." "You bastard!" "I told you to use a permanent marker." "please stop." "We don't want the patients to know we're having an affair!" "I'm leaving." "please calm down." "The ink was only to mark the troubled spot!" "There's something terrible going on in your brain right now." "in a matter of days your head will...uh...it'll go BOOM." "What's with that?" "your head will go BOOM." "...My head will go BOOM?" "Stop clowning around." "Damn it!" "Did he find out?" "!" "I can't fall ill when my country needs me!" "Please cure me!" "Ah..." "This guy's a moron..." "D-Don't worry." "You'll be okay if you just check into the hospital!" "I don't have time to stay in a hospital." "I don't care if the treatment is harsh." "Just quickly cure me." "You're really something..." "It's not our fault if you die." "get me that thing!" "I don't what "that" is." "Kagurazaka-kun." "so come over here..." "Zentogen?" "the Japanese word for X-ray.]" "Hasegawa-kun?" "How do I know?" "You're the one who wants it!" "it's all right." "It's a powerful machine that will uproot the source of your illness." "Get inside the machine." "Go!" "Where's the machine?" "!" "That can't be..." "Just get inside." "[Box says:" "Extra Stiff Adult Diapers]" "Inside!" "Let's do it!" "Beat him up so they'll keep him in the hospital!" "Gintoki!" "What are you doing in a place like this?" "what's going on?" "I'm really sorry." "We have no resentment towards you." "But just... just check into the hospital!" "Have you guys gone mad?" "!" "I'll make you bite off your own heads!" "Hasegawa-san!" "What's the matter?" "What happened?" "Uchino-san..." "You're still young..." "You shouldn't give up so easily..." "Hasegawa-san!" "My health isn't just important to me." "It's for the country." "I won't let you guys mess me up so easily..." "Hey!" "...Huh?" "What are you guys doing?" "!" "Head Nurse!" "Kill me!" "Kill me!" "Kill me!" "Kill me!" "what a mess." "Why do we have to stay in the hospital longer?" "!" "interfering with someone's love affairs can only bring bad luck." "But that's all right." "Something like this happens only once in a while." "I heard that Katsura-san was hospitalized after all." "Looks like the head nurse beat him to a pulp." "The rest is up to Uchino-san." "There's nothing more we can do." "Speaking of that..." "It looks like Uchino-san has confessed." "All the patients are so excited!" "It's like their Uchee has a boyfriend." "What?" "!" "You're kidding!" "but then she got her chance." "She must have felt like she had to do something." "Do you really think so?" "A totally useless old man..." "Maybe he gave her some courage?" "Idiot..." "There's no way a lady in love would notice a Madao." "But I still can't believe..." "About Zura... look over there." "You see?" "Over there!" "it looks like she's having fun." "It's so good to be young..." "Who's that?" "It's her boyfriend with the intense eyes who's from a different world." "I see..." "That's what it is..." "Here we go... did you hear about Uchino-san?" "I heard." "It's unbelievable." "Why is she with that thing?" "I was certain she liked the guy with the long hair." "you know..." "That strange thing was also hit by a mysterious old geezer." "Just like the man with sunglasses." "That's right." "anyway?" "so why don't you call him "Na-san"?" "Sounds perfect!" "ladies." "How about having lunch during lunch time?" "[Spoof of scene from Sin City movie.]" "["Gin-san Has Turned Into An Invisible Man"]" "I feel awful." "Am I still hung over from drinking sake last night?" "Here we go... it's morning." "Wake up!" "Huh?" "Huh?" "What's this?" "I can't see myself!" "What does this mean?" "Eh?" "but I'm also invisible!" "Wh-Wh-What's going on?" "!" "Invisible man?" "Did I turn into an invisible man?" "!" "wake up!" "Kagura!" "What?" "Gin-chan?" "You're too noisy this early in the morning..." "Huh?" "Gin-chan?" "Even Kagura has turned invisible!" "Invisible?" "Huh?" "I can't see myself?" "What's this?" "What's going on?" "but we've become invisible men." "What?" "!" "An invisible man has appeared?" "But an invisible man shouldn't be able to appear!" "Stop saying things like "Mii and Kay." "[Note:" "Mii and Kay make up the PINK LADY duo band who's hit song was "Invisible Man."]" "we can't see ourselves!" "What does this mean?" "Kagura!" "Gin-chan." "it's true!" "This is really bad. a young man and girl naked under one roof is..." "I'm not a little girl anymore." "No!" "Where's your common sense?" "!" "Don't say something like that!" "too!" "Ow..." "Huh?" "I'm wearing my clothes." "Even my clothes are invisible." "What's really going on?" "I'm completely naked." "What?" "!" "Just kidding." "Don't make fun of adults!" "Gin-chan." "But I can't believe even Sadaharu is invisible." "ow!" "He's biting me!" "Biting!" "Sadaharu is biting me!" "Gin-san!" "it's Shinpachi!" "We have a problem!" "we have a problem!" "Ouch... too." "Everyone in Edo has turned invisible." "even their clothes and glasses are invisible." "I'm completely naked." "What?" "!" "Just kidding." "stop it." "Ouch!" "we have to find the cause... ow!" "He's biting me!" "Biting!" "Sadaharu is biting me!" "stop it!" "that's not Sadaharu." "no!" "that's me!" "Sadaharu!" "you knew all along and you're doing it on purpose?" "Of course not!" "Ow! the people watching us on TV can only see the background." "What the hell is going on?" "!" "[Director of Photography]" "I forgot to turn on the cell." "[Cell A" " Gin-san]" "[BG" " Yorozuya] [Cell C] [BG]" "Ah..." "Then Stop Eating and Start Moving." "[FASTING DOJO]" "Kagura and the girls are experiencing extreme weight gain.]" "[They've come to the Fasting Dojo to go on a fearless diet!" "]"