Q:

C++ should I use pointer or reference?

I would like to have an insight about whenever I should be using references or pointers.
Let's take the example of a Polygon class using a Rectangle class for its internal bounding box.
Polygon.h
class Polygon {

private:
    std::list<Point> _points;
    Rectangle _boundingBox;

public:
    Polygon(const std::list<Point> &);

public:
    const std::list<Point> &getPoints() const;
    const Rectangle &getBoundingBox() const;

private:
    void setBoundingBox();

};

Polygon.cpp
#include <iostream>
#include "Polygon.h"

Polygon::Polygon(const std::list<Point> &points)
{
    if (points.size() < polygon::MIN_SIDE + 1) {
        throw std::invalid_argument("A polygon is composed of at least 3 sides.");
    }

    if (points.front() != points.back()) {
        throw std::invalid_argument("A polygon must be closed therefore the first point must be equal to the last one.");
    }

    std::list<Point>::const_iterator it;
    for (it = ++points.begin(); it != points.end(); ++it) {
        this->_points.push_back(*it);
    }
    this->setBoundingBox();
}

void Polygon::translate(const std::array<float, 2> &vector)
{
    std::list<Point>::iterator it;
    for (it = this->_points.begin(); it != this->_points.end(); ++it) {
        (*it).setX((*it).getX() + vector[0]);
        (*it).setY((*it).getY() + vector[1]);
    }
    Point topLeft = this->_boundingBox->getTopLeft();
    Point bottomRight = this->_boundingBox->getBottomRight();

    topLeft.setX(topLeft.getX() + vector[0]);
    topLeft.setY(topLeft.getY() + vector[1]);
    bottomRight.setX(bottomRight.getX() + vector[0]);
    bottomRight.setY(bottomRight.getY() + vector[1]);
}

const std::list<Point> &Polygon::getPoints() const
{
    return this->_points;
}

const Rectangle &Polygon::getBoundingBox() const
{
    return this->_boundingBox;
}

void Polygon::setBoundingBox()
{
    float xMin = this->_points.front().getX();
    float xMax = this->_points.front().getX();
    float yMin = this->_points.front().getY();
    float yMax = this->_points.front().getY();

    std::list<Point>::const_iterator it;
    for (it = this->_points.begin(); it != this->_points.end(); ++it)
    {
        Point point = *it;
        if (point.getX() < xMin) {
            xMin = point.getX();
        }
        if (point.getX() > xMax) {
            xMax = point.getX();
        }
        if (point.getY() < yMin) {
            yMin = point.getY();
        }
        if (point.getY() > yMax) {
            yMax = point.getY();
        }
    }
    this->_boundingBox = new Rectangle(Point(xMin, yMin), Point(xMax, yMax));
}

std::ostream &operator<<(std::ostream &out, const Polygon &polygon)
{
    std::list<Point>::const_iterator it;

    for (it = polygon.getPoints().begin(); it != polygon.getPoints().end(); ++it) {
        out << (*it);
        if (it != polygon.getPoints().end()) {
            out << " ";
        }
    }
    return out;
}

Rectangle.h
#pragma once

#include <stdexcept>

#include "Point.h"

class Rectangle {

private:
    Point _topLeft;
    Point _bottomRight;

public:
    Rectangle(const Point &, const Point &);

public:
    const Point &getTopLeft() const;
    const Point &getBottomRight() const;
    float getWidth() const;
    float getHeight() const;
};

Rectangle.cpp
#include "Rectangle.h"

Rectangle::Rectangle(const Point &topLeft, const Point &bottomRight)
{
    if (topLeft.getX() > bottomRight.getX() || topLeft.getY() > bottomRight.getY()) {
        throw std::invalid_argument("You must specify valid top-left/bottom-right points");
    }
    this->_topLeft = topLeft;
    this->_bottomRight = bottomRight;
}

const Point &Rectangle::getTopLeft() const
{
    return this->_topLeft;
}

const Point &Rectangle::getBottomRight() const
{
    return this->_bottomRight;
}

float Rectangle::getWidth() const
{
    return this->_bottomRight.getX() - this->_topLeft.getX();
}

float Rectangle::getHeight() const
{
    return this->_bottomRight.getY() - this->_topLeft.getY();
}

Point.h
#pragma once

#include <ostream>
#include <cmath>

class Point {

private:
    float _x;
    float _y;

public:
    Point(float = 0, float = 0);

public:
    float distance(const Point &);

public:
    float getX() const;
    float getY() const;
    void setX(float);
    void setY(float);
};

std::ostream &operator<<(std::ostream &, const Point &);
bool operator==(const Point &, const Point &);
bool operator!=(const Point &, const Point &);

Point.cpp
#include "Point.h"

Point::Point(float x, float y)
{
    this->_x = x;
    this->_y = y;
}

float Point::distance(const Point &other)
{
    return std::sqrt(std::pow(this->_x - other.getX(), 2) + std::pow(this->_y - other.getY(), 2));
}

float Point::getX() const
{
    return this->_x;
}

float Point::getY() const
{
    return this->_y;
}

void Point::setX(float x)
{
    this->_x = x;
}

void Point::setY(float y)
{
    this->_y = y;
}

std::ostream &operator<<(std::ostream &out, const Point &point)
{
    out << "(" << point.getX() << ", " << point.getY() << ")";
    return out;
}

bool operator==(const Point &p1, const Point &p2)
{
    return p1.getX() == p2.getX() && p1.getY() == p2.getY();
}

bool operator!=(const Point &p1, const Point &p2)
{
    return p1.getX() != p2.getX() || p1.getY() != p2.getY();
}

A lot of questions come with this snippet of code.

This does not compile because obviously whenever we try to create a Polygon, it ends up trying to create a Rectangle with a default constructor which does not exist.
I can't use initializer list because obviously the bounding box depends on some computed values from my list of points.
I could create a default constructor creating two Point(0, 0) by default for the Rectangle but this does not make much sense.
I could use pointers but then I feel this is not the nicest solution as I tend to think this is mostly used for polymorphism in C++ we should prefer reference whenever possible.

How should I then proceed ?
I feel I am missing something out about C++ and could learn a lot from this.

A:

I think your main question is about how to deal with the problem of needing to initialize both std::list<Point> _points; and Rectangle _boundingBox;, while also doing some validation of _points.
The simplest solution is to just give Rectangle a default constructor (or pass two default Points as initializer). Then once you have validated the points argument in the constructor, you calculate the Rectangle based on the points.

A slightly more complicated alternative is to allow the validation function to be invoked from the ctor-initializer list, e.g.:
Polygon::Polygon(std::list<Point> points)
    : _points( validate_point_list(points), std::move(points) ), _boundingBox( calculateBoundingBox(_points) ) 
{
}

where you have functions (which could be free functions):
void validate_point_list(std::list<Point> &points)
{
    if (points.size() < polygon::MIN_SIDE + 1)
        throw std::invalid_argument("A polygon is composed of at least 3 sides.");

    if (points.front() != points.back())
        throw std::invalid_argument("A polygon must be closed therefore the first point must be equal to the last one.");

// caller must pass in same first and last point, but we only store one of the two
    points.erase( points.begin() );
}

and 
Rectangle calculateBoundingBox(std::list<Point> const &_points)
{
    // whatever logic you have in setBoundingBox, except return the answer
}

Note that the loop in your Polygon constructor is unnecessarily complicated. You could have just written _points = points; and then erased the extra point (which is O(1) for lists).

Note that I have passed by value and then used std::move. The reason is that if the argument given is a rvalue then it can just be moved right on through into where it's being stored; whereas with the const & version, a copy is stored and then the original is destructed.
I would use const & a lot less than you did. Small objects , such as Point and Rectangle, don't suffer a performance penalty from pass-by-value (and might even be more efficient that way). And as mentioned in the previous paragraph; if your function accepts a parameter and it is going to take a copy of that parameter, it's better to pass by value .   
Passing by reference is best only when you are using but not storing the values passed. For example, calculateBoundingBox.

Finally, once you get this working, you might want to think about having the Polygon constructor accept an iterator pair of points range, and/or a std::initializer_list. 

