Recap

Couch: A psychiatrist (who looks like a caricature of Sigmund Freud) is sitting in a chair next to the couch. Homer hops on the couch and yells, "Oh, doctor, I'm crazy!", then sobs as the other family members stare sadly at each other

Episode Quotes

Bart:(Holding up skateboard) Satan, eat my shorts!(Crowd cheers)Bart:(Singing) I was a sinner, a real bad kid.
What thou shalt not, I shalt did.
Neighbor's cat I tried to neuter,
Took a whiz on the school's computer.Sherri & Terri: He took a whiz, oh, yes he did.Bart: But now I changed, you can't deny.
Come on up, and testify.Sherri & Terri: Testify, testify, come on up and testify!Grampa: My hip's misbehavin'.(Bart knocks his cane away.)Grampa: Hey!Sherri & Terri: Testify!Patty: Got a nicotine cravin'.(Bart slaps away the cigarettes.)Sherri & Terri: Testify!Professor Frink: Got a cramp in my glavin. (Bart kicks Frink's rump.)Professor Frink: Oy!Bart: Testify!All: Testify! Testify!(Bart dramatically holds up two lit Roman candles, one in each hand. The flames shoot off to his sides.)

Lovejoy: Am I boring you, Bart?
Bart: Well, to be honest, yes.Lovejoy: Hey, I'm doing the best with the material I have.Bart: But church can be fun! (everyone laughs) No, really, it can be a crazy party, with clouds and lasers and miracles.Homer: And chili fries!Bart: A real preacher knows how to bring the Bible alive, through music, and dancing, and Tae-Bo! (begins Tae-Bo-ing)Sideshow Mel: He's kicking it old-school!

Lisa: Bart, I hope you don't believe your own hype.Bart: Number of miracles performed by Bart: Two. Number of miracles performed by Lisa: Zero.Lisa: How can you believe all this mumbo-jumbo? The bucket came off Dad's head because the bright lights heated it, causing the metal to expand.Bart: Heat makes metal expand. Now who's talking mumbo-jumbo?

Homer: Poor guy... he lost his leg.Dr. Hibbert: Oh, no, no. The fans will whoop it up with that tonight -- you know, drink beer out of it and so on -- but, uh, it'll turn up in the morning, and I'll sew it back on.Marge: Will that really work?Dr. Hibbert: Well, I assume so... as long as I have Bart's healing powers...Bart: Why won't anybody listen to me? I don't have any special powers. I am not a healer!Dr. Hibbert: Fine. More money for me.

Kent: Big game fever is taking a fevered pitch as the fevered rivalry between Springfield U and Springfield A&M spreads like wild fever. This, this is writing?Nephew: I'm sorry, Uncle Kent. I lost my thesaurus.Kent: Ugh, thesaurus, you'll lose more than that…..In preparation for the big game, Springfield Stadium has caught additional seating capacity fever. Arrgh!

Episode Goofs

When Bart holds the note in "Testify", through the tent's skylight, he's briefly seen wearing the red cape again that was removed when he got on stage.