Samuel L. Jackson has just announced that he's quitting acting — but don't worry, you'll still be able to see the "Pulp Fiction" star deliver immensely entertaining and no-doubt obscenity-laden performances on the big screen in the future.

Jackson shocked the internet — at least momentarily — when he popped up in a video Friday to announce, "I am quitting acting and pursuing a life of vigilantism."

Of course, he's not doing any such thing — though that would be awesome. And surely obscenity-laden.

The announcement came at the conclusion of a contest on Reddit.com, in which Reddit users were urged to submit a 300-word monolog. According to the contest rules, the winning entry would be read aloud by Jackson.

But Jackson shook the world when he appeared in the video and announced, "Hi, I'm Samuel L. Jackson. I'm sorry to disappoint you, Reddit, but I've decided to break the rules of my own competition, and I will not be reading a user-submitted entry as my monolog. Instead, I'd like to speak to you all from my own heart, in my own words; honestly and openly. I've been waiting to reveal something for a long, long, time and… well, here it is: I am quitting acting and pursuing a life of vigilantism. Now, I know what you're thinking: "Sam Jack, you are one bad motherfucker when it comes to the fine art of thespianism." And you know what? You're right. But it's time for me to step out of the limelight … and step into the shadows."

A noble endeavor, for sure. But as it turns out, completely inaccurate. Jackson was, in fact, reading a monologue crafted for maximum trolling by a Reddit user named adiddy.