These are the Olde Book Backpack and Messenger Bag available from ThinkGeek. The messenger bag costs $50, the backpack $60, and either is guaranteed to get the attention of the sexy librarian of your dreams. *puts pencil in hair, pushes glasses to end of nose* Hey good lookin', nice backpack -- are you familiar with the Huey Decibel System? "It's Dewey Decimal System, and yes." That's cool, I'm not a real librarian anyways, I just played one in a softcore video once when I was in college and needed money to pay rent and buy ramen noodles and Celeste pizzas. So -- your place or mine? "I'M NOT INTERESTED." Shhhhhhhh, this is a library! Come on, at least come over and read me a fairy tale before bed.

Keep going for several more shots and a video.

Thanks again to Gregory, who, for two tips in a row, gets to pull his desk up to the front of the class and sit by me.