TALE OF THE TAPE

Was The Trent Richardson Trade Less Painful Than LeBron James’ “The Decision”?

Oh. Poor Cleveland. Not again. I can’t believe this is happening to those poor fellas. For those of you who haven’t been paying attention…Trent Richardson, the #3 overall draft pick in the 2012 draft, just got traded to the Indianapolis Colts (where he’ll play with the #1 overall draft pick, Andrew Luck). That means that, up to this weekend, Cleveland’s leading rusher is quarterback Brandon Weeden, who has 7 yards. In 2 games. NONE of the Brown’s RBs have a single yard. It’s…a disaster. But how does it compare to Cleveland’s greatest heartbreak – “The Decision”? Let’s go to the tape to see which of the two was less painful for the city of Cleveland.

Trent Richardson Trade

LeBron James 'Decision

Metaphorical Pain Scale Equivalent?

Winner
Someone clubbing you in the head with a brick when you aren’t looking.

A month-long torture where you’re awake and in full control of your faculties for every second of it.

Dan Gilbert’s magenta-tinted comic sans letter about how Cleveland will win a championship before LeBron James. That didn’t work out. Twice.

Most Pompous Moment in Sports History?

Winner
No, it’s just business. Plus, many speculate that this will give the Browns the draft firepower to acquire a Teddy Bridgewater, and actually start a true rebuilding process.

Oh yes.

The Winner Is

WinnerTrent Richardson Trade

7 out of 7

Oh my, sports fans. We’ve never seen a victory quite this lopsided in Tale of the Tape history. The Richardson trade sweeps The Decision, 7-0. In a manner of speaking, Cleveland finally won! That said, losing your best offensive player, and STILL having it be 100% less painful than the LeBron fiasco just goes to show you what a dog and pony show the whole thing was. Just disgraceful.
-Brian Cullen, CBS Local Sports contributor