Monday, February 15, 2010

The twain finally meet.

“Aye thu blady naansense”, I screeched into the unsuspecting ear of The Eyer, when he suggested we meet up at Lalbagh.“My fother will drive so far or what?”I said, picturing my journey-across-the-seven-seas for our much awaited meetup.

“Shut up now.Basavangudi is central, its you Malleswaram types that are in the burbs.” He said.Besides it’s walking distance for me”, he added helpfully.

“Ohoho, very close to you means what I must do.Trans Siberian Railway and all I cant catch and come to see your face ok.”

“Dude you didn’t volunteer to organize this, so thatsaaal means thatsaal, jhungachukka.You must only come to Lalbagh and meet us, I do not know anything.Besides, it’s your workplace anyway.”

“Ayeeeeee, how very dare you call me a gardener I say?”

“Err, because you are one?”

“Oh correct no?Ok, see you in half an hour.”

Unwittingly caught in the crossfire was our celebrity guest - Krish Attack, who magnanimously postponed his flight back to Chennai to hang out with us, after smashing his way through a maha funda presentation at IIMB.After some frantic calls to ascertain his whereabouts, we finally located him, suitcase in hand, appropriately clad for the Bangalore chill in a three piece suit.

After a couple of “mad or what?” looks directed at the Eyer and I, who were busy clawing each other’s eyes out deciding which Lalbagh gate to enter, he cleared his throat.The Eyer and I stopped in mid claw and looked back at his rapidly reddening complexion.

“Err, I have seen Lalbagh before you know”, he ventured timidly, peeling off 7 layers of winterwear.“My parents took me there as a kid.”

“So, err.. what shall we do then?”said the Eyer, dismayed at his grandiose plans of a botanical tour of the gardens being dashed to the ground.

“Eh, lets eat”, we all said in chorus, and whirled the car around to our first stop in the gastronomic tour of “the place where the other people live” – Basavangudi.

First stop:New Modran Hotel.“Do not put leg on Chair.Do not wash hand in plate.Do not yodel. Do not sing mainstream Telugu film songs while chewing”, read the sign above where we sat, as we waited for the famous modran hotel thatte-idli to arrive.Meh.It was salright.Sorry Eyerboss.Veena shtore rules.Aaa nexxxxxt…

My smirkiness died a quick death however, when we stopped at our next venue: Shettr angdi (appojite New Modran Hotel).After making us chomp through an interestingish tamota-slice, The Eyer pulled out his trump card.He whispered into the Jabba-the-hut-like proprietor’s ear.Jabba guffawed, gave us the up-and-down, rubbed his palms together and went to work:on Shettrangdi Special Andre Speshhhhhal Butter Gulkand.

“Whaaaaaaaaaat?”I hear you loyal Bhagyalakshmi Butter Gulkand loving Malleswaramites scream?“How very dare you, Bikerdude”, you sob?Well sadly, Shettru has only one word to say to you.“Mwah.”

First came a gob of butter.Then a slather of gulkand.Then the mixed fruitu.Familiar enough, no?But no.That’s where Bhagyalakshmi stops and Shettrangdi starts.On went the murabba (murabba???Yes) followed by nuts, candy, more fuits, chaat masala (No!Yeah?Yeah.) and finally a dollop of butterskaachu icecream!

Enoughaaaa?No.On the top of the butterskaachu went more chopped nuts and a glazed cherry.Whaaaaaataylovely!!!!Jabba handed it over with a flourish and 12 seconds later, fini!What a beauty I say!Sorry ma Bhagyaakshmi, you lose.Ok? ok.

Next stoppu:Subbamma angadi.While Attack stocked up on 564 packets of kodbale and chakli, I settled for the mind numbingly spicy masala vadey. Good stuff.Well done Subbamma, wherever you are, smiling down upon us with a plate of dynamite-nippat in hand.

With about minus 10 minutes to spare for Attack saar to catch his flight, we managed to teleport him straight into a vayu vajra, from where with his superior Web 2.0 skills he managed to re-program the check-in-lady’s brain to jettison him through an open cockpit window into the flight as it was taxiing off to Chennai.

So- um yeah. Basavangudi.Hmm.Some possibilities there I agree :)

Many thanks to Eyer saar for smiling stoically through all manner of abuses hurled.I am suitably impressed ok?ok.

Attack saar, kindly come nesht time I say.I will feed CTR benne masale and veena idly and you only decide.

One small correction - We all watched Mani Shankar Aiyar give high funda peter at IIMB. The only thing I gave was the occasional vague joke like "I come from the Breakfast in Chennai, Lunch in London and indigestion in New York generation of California Computer Coding Coolies" or something like that.

And before any benne ala urulaikazhangiatta can be sampled in your part of town, pliss to head down to Madras for some authentic Burmese fare at well..Burma Bazaar

As Basavangudi 's Offcial Spokesperson (Forin Depotmentu) I am glad to see that this 'Avar-Amman Ki Asha' effort for peace between Basavangudi and Malleshwaram has begun smoothly, in presence of distinguished third party. Looking forward to many more such external affairs and bilateral excursions.

(By the by, nice morabba drawing. Correct colour you have got off. And Jebba. Without tracing only you did off-a?)

Aiyo seriously whaaaaaaaaaa? you mean Bhagyalakshmi Butter gulkand has competition? no! how? i just cant believe ich! I have to try this shettrangdi I say. Will include this in my itinerary when i visit Basavangudi. weekend only i can go there pa, too much planning required no.

my3, serendipity nandini, :brahmin's coffee bar and VB were my college haunts. Went to the latter recently, couldnt recognize the place without the grottiness of yesteryear and came back without eating only. Anyway The Eyer said he wasnt a big fan of it :P

mohan: haudalla? monne i went to janata to get sambar - no great shakes any more. and those gargantuan vadeys are like chakli size now. Hoon CTR is back in business and just as nice as before :)

Attacksaar, Harini: yes yes coming coming :)

inbavalli: kindly describe said jigiridhanda i say!

anna bond: kindly convey best regards to family owners! Ootadh beedhi is next shtapu (and hopefully material for next poshtu)

mischief maker: subbamma is solpa naat available now i think. Its family members are still doing roaring business evidently!

longblack: aaan correccct. u also talkoff like this maa, no yescape im telling you

Eyersaar: Yes yes several long lasting bilateral relations are from henceforth hoped to be maintained

Aditya: Hoon pa, kadsheeko!

Nileena: Ayyo iseeeet? Inssstantly I am going. Ifonnnly namma BIAL was in bidadi instead of dyavudapalli (not complaining abotu that one bit) we would have had regular thatte idli no?

shruthi: correctu full voyaze of seven seas it is, but worthiteyesay- go off!

Zahra: Hogamma = go mother. Original song is "Bhagyada lakshmi baarama" (oh Lakshmi the bringer of good fortune, come,amma)

Yayay yet again you make me laugh int he middle of workday when physical knee pain where bringing unwanted floods to the eyes.... welcome back ... pliss to be staying here only not disappearing.... mwaah

Totally agree with your Mallespura fixation dood..nann kelidre must die off with a piece of Veena stores idlichutney in your mouth! But somehow this murabbagirabba and aal I dont like. Just saying.

I always wanted to tell you this..PLEASE watch 'Bhavya Brahmanda' on Suvarna chonnel at 9 a.m. Thotagarike minss you have no office & no hours. Watch it AT LEAST for a week to get the whole juice.You gotta say something about it, man! PLEEJ.

On a different note, I've noticed that Bangalore temperatures have been soaring lately. Like any true bangalorean (especially a Malleswaramite) would, I quickly looked up the temperatures in Chennai. Results of comparisons are very disappaainting, I say!! :(I remember how accurately you noted in one of your older posts, that we bangaloreans find solace only when our temperatures are at least 7-8 degrees lower than Chennai's at any given time.How's the mood with people this time around in this regard? Cool majjige may not do us any good, unless Chennai's tempeature skyrockets into the 40s soon :D. What say?

So happy to see you writing again.I was checking your blogs like a maniac daily to see if you have posted anything new...Thanks for returning..I loved your new entry as usual and laughed my head off...

Aa yes - bannee saar! Welcome back. Jesht I took chance-u to see if yennnything abowe the jyaakfruitu - and whataysurprizisay!

Your pal Eyer did not take you to Srinivasa Brahmins Bakery wa? Ayyo - next time you "schlep" to my hometown, musht go, wokay? Wokay. Also, to be hyawing idly vade sambar at Brahmins Coffee Bar. (spotting Brahmin pattrun? This is Basavanagudi, I say!)

Hey, can you tell me where this shettru angadi is? Veena stores idli is very good i agree, you have to check out brahmin's cafe idly near uma theatre (best in the world) :) and nothing can beat CTR benne masale.... i guess its under renovation right now...

Basavangudi indeed! Maleswaram Rocks. Do go through my article in Rediff on the best dosais in Bengaluru, http://www.rediff.com/getahead/2006/mar/20rest.htmThe score is Malleswaram 2, Basavanagudi 1. That goes for pretty much everything. By the way, my family stays in RT Nagar and I am in Abu Dhabi at the mo.Your blog gets me maudlin about Bengaluru and Malleswaram. Loved the Mandyam lady's dialogue with the Call Centre guy. Will visit it very often. should thank my brother for pointing me to it. The butter gulkand, must try it sometime but Shettru Angadi seems to be a nightmare for me, what with my sugar levels. Getting on in years you know!

Hi,I think I came to your space some 2 years ago, while i was just blog hopping, and I couldn't stop laughing after reading some of your blogs. You really write very well.Now again as I was hopping from blog to blog i came across you again : it was a pleasant surprise.I am also from Bangalore (Whitefield).Have a nice day.

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