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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

*squints* Is that not a (patoooie!) cupcake cake? Will the poor elephant rip in half, or topple to his death when hungry party-goers finally reach the centre? Will the lion get his own dinner, or be left frozen and hungry in the wasteland of empty cupcake wrappers?

While the Artax reference would make me tear up, my kid wouldn't shed a single tear over this cake. He would think it was like his book - Simba and Nala Help Bomo, where the two lions help a baby elephant that is stuck in the mud get out.

The elephant is drowning in green Jello... uh, very... creative! And, oh look! theres another dying animal under the price tag! (I can't even tell what sort of animal it's supposed to be...) I think the lion really doesn't like green Jello because look! He's eating grass. Strange? No actually. Haven't you seen the south african vegetarian lions? No? Well then your life isn't complete.

Why is it that the rank amateurs know that if you're piping blue gel for a body of water, you MUST make the icing underneath it white, so it doesn't look like the tar pit of death, but the "professionals" (and I use the term loosely) can't figure that out? Or do they just not give a rat's red rump?

When I was about ten, I flooded part of my back yard with a hose until I had an impressive mud pit. Then I sloshed through it for like two hours screaming, "Aaaaaartaaax!" My parents were not amused when they got home.

I kind of like the life lesson in this CCC. The sticker is hiding a gorilla who is watching the elephant's demise. He's not helping the elephant, he may even have engineered the situation, and he hides behind "it's just business."Now pay attention kids because this is what adulthood is: either a gorilla tricks you into killing yourself for his amusement -OR- you destroy an elephant for your own gain.The lion about to eat the gorilla represents the inevitibility of death, regardless of your own success.The circle of life indeed.

So, does the elephant have legs that are smashed down taking up valuable cupcake space? Or is it a legless elephant? Pulling an elephant off a cake only to find it was a quadruple amputee would be the cracking point for me.

There is a story of a woman running away from tigers. She runs and runs and the tigers are getting closer and closer. When she comes to the edge of a cliff, she sees some vines there, so she climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down, she sees that there are tigers below her as well. She then notices that a mouse is gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees a beautiful little bunch of strawberries close to her, growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and she looks down. She looks at the mouse. Then she just takes a strawberry, puts it in her mouth, and says, "This is the BEST strawberry I've ever tasted!"

It has nothing to do with the wreck, but I absolutely love that story.